If the Deep Sea Forgets You

“I don’t think he looked like that though, he sat here beside you and waited for a long time that day. He didn’t do anything, and just drank his coffee. I reckon he wanted to wait until you had slept enough, but you slept for too long in the end and he left first.”

Xia Qingyi felt that it was a little inappropriate to hear news on Mo Han so abruptly from a stranger. She could see that the girl would keep on chatting and wanted to leave. “That… I still have something on… in the future… when I have time, we can talk.”

Xia Qingyi retreated and did not continue to listen to what the girl was saying, leaving as though she was fleeing for her life.

She walked on the road, thought back to what the girl had said when she suddenly remembered something. She stopped in the tracks and her eyes widened before she started to flip through her bag.

No wonder she kept feeling that her sleeping pills had decreased by a lot these few days. She had just started on them, and when she woke up she felt that there was less than half of the bottle left. Now that she thought of it, Mo Han had probably poured the pills away when she was still asleep.

Xia Qingyi held up her phone and wondered whether to give Mo Han a call. But she decided not to in the end. He had not mentioned it to her when he had come probably because he did not want her to discover it. He had also told her not to contact him.

What if he got angry?

She let go of this thought and prepared to return and act as though nothing had happened when Han Liang called her.

“Hello? Where are you?”

“At Linyin Street, I’m coming back soon.”

“Don’t go home, come to where I am at, I have something for you to do.”

“What is it?”

“You’ll know when you come. I’m at Someday restaurant, you can take a taxi here.”

“Must I go?” Xia Qingyi asked. She thought that Han Liang was going to introduce her to some friends from the past again and chat with them, but she had never liked doing these kind of things.

“Yeah. Just come over.”

She could not shirk away from it any longer. “Alright, then wait for me for a while.”

After Xia Qingyi hung up, Han Liang shook his phone before the person sitting opposite him at the Someday restaurant. “Don’t worry, she’ll come here soon.”

The person opposite him smiled lightly, and spoke in a low but attractive voice. “It’s okay, I’m used to waiting for her.”

When Xia Qingyi arrived and saw Han Liang, he was sitting alone at the table. He smiled and waved his hand at her, and Xia Qingyi walked towards him. She had just sat down and wanted to place her bag at the side, but her clothes accidentally hooked onto the zipper on her bag, and she bent her head down as she tried to separate them.

She was busy trying to deal with the clothes stuck in the zipper when she suddenly heard that there seemed to be someone beside her, and Han Liang had asked him, what did he want to eat?

She raised her head, wanting to see what Han Liang’s friend looked like, and she did not expect to see a familiar face. It was Mo Han.

Their eyes met, the many words they wanted to say hidden within their eyes, but they just quietly stared at each other.

“I knew you’d be surprised.” Han Liang rubbed her head. “We wanted to discuss the remuneration, which was what we had talked about earlier with you, as a form of appreciation to Barrister Mo. I initially wanted to go S City today, but he said he was in F City, so we just decided to meet here. I called you here so that you could help with some suggestions.”

“This is between the two of you, so you can just discuss it between yourselves. There’s no need to call me here.” Xia Qingyi hastily glanced at Mo Han before she avoided looking into his eyes, her heart thumping about agitatedly, and she moved her hands a little to hide the clamor within herself. She lowered her head and tried to get her clothes out from the zipper, but the more she tried, the more wedged it became.

“What is it? Your clothes are stuck?” Han Liang and Xia Qingyi sat on one side, and he looked over the table at her.

“Yeah,” Xia Qingyi did not raise her head. Her hand was all sweaty, she held onto her clothes and refused to let go.

“I can help you,” Han Liang wanted to lean over.

“No need, no need…” Xia Qingyi wanted to retreat, but Han Liang grabbed her hand, and helped her pull her clothes out.

“Don’t be so anxious, look, your hands are all sweaty now, it’s no wonder you couldn’t pull it out,” Han Liang said, his hand slowly tugging at the zipper, and her clothes were freed not longer after.

Xia Qingyi secretly wiped the sweat on her palms on her shirt, and stoically smiled at Han Liang. After Han Liang helped her smoothen out her clothes, he looked over at the expressionless and silent Mo Han and smiled. “I’m sorry, Barrister Mo, look at me! I was helping her with her clothes and had forgotten about you, I’m really sorry.”

Mo Han only said, “Let’s order our food.”

The meal turned out to be a rather uncomfortable experience. Xia Qingyi kept her head lowered and only took food from the plate closest to her for the entire time. She nibbled on her food, hoping for this meal to end sooner.

She had thought of what the situation would be like when she met up with Mo Han, but she never thought that it would be something like this, that it would be sitting beside Han Liang to discuss the amount of remuneration with Mo Han.

Han Liang said, “I will take care of the medical fees, school fees, living fees, whatever amount Nian Nian had spent over there with you. In addition, the both of us will prepare another sum compensation for you, just treat it as compensation for the time you’d spent taking care of Nian Nian.”

Mo Han’s eyes always remained on Han Liang. “She mostly spent small amounts of money here and there when she was with me, so if you really want to compensate me for every single cent, I can no longer remember what she spent it on.”

“If it’s like this, then we can only do it ourselves. Nian Nian, how do you think we should decide for the compensation?”

The hand that was holding the chopsticks trembled a little. She did not even dare to look at Mo Han and hastily said, “As long as he’s satisfied. You two don’t have to consider my opinions.”

“How can we not consider your opinions? Your opinions are very important.”

Mo Han interrupted Han Liang, seemingly replying to Xia Qingyi’s previous statement, “Actually…” He stopped for a while, the corners of his mouth curling into a smile. He casually poked at the vegetables in his bowl as he continued, “Things don’t have to be so complicated, if you two are willing to compensate me more, I’m okay with any amount. She’s someone who had stayed at my place for so long after all.”

Xia Qingyi raised her head, and looked at him for the first time they were at this table.

“I’m not Nian Nian’s relative, I pretended to be her brother in name only. Now that she’s returned, if you want to pay remuneration, then you can pay. The amount doesn’t matter; I don’t care about the money anyway.”

After hearing Mo Han say these words, Xia Qingyi did not feel very well, as though all the feelings and relationship between the two of them could be settled by a sum of money. The rice she was chewing in her mouth had already lost its taste. She really did not want to sit there and listen to them talk about money, so she simply stood up and said, “Sorry, I’m going to the washroom.”

Xia Qingyi behaved just like before, she clearly did not need to go to the toilet but she still holed herself in there and did not want to come out. She did not want to face the two people outside discussing the calculation of money because of her. During times like this, she felt that she was no different from worthless goods.

She sat on the sink in the female washroom, looked at her dangling legs with her head lowered, and occasionally raised her head to look back at herself in the mirror. There was not a trace of a smile on her face, and she had some slight dark eye circles, her dispirited look making her seem like a stranger.

So what if she could find her memories? She was still unable to go back.

Why did she want to go back? Without her, Mo Han’s life would become smoother. Without her, he would probably be able to adjust back to his old life quickly, and return to the peaceful and steady life he had in the past.

She jumped down from the sink, faced the mirror and sighed at herself. She patted her own face, she should stop thinking about it. It was time to go out.

She closed the washroom door, and when she turned back she was shocked by the person leaning against the wall.

It was Mo Han. He leaned back against the wall, and opposite him was the male washroom. He was smoking, his eyes looking at the swirling smoke, seemingly not noticing Xia Qingyi’s presence.

Xia Qingyi smelled the pungent smell of smoke and frowned. Seeing him all quiet and in such low spirits, she did not know what to say either, and decided to turn and walk away, pretending not to have seen anything.

“You don’t even want to greet me after you’ve seen me?” Mo Han deeply sucked in a puff of smoke.

Xia Qingyi turned around again, and forced herself to smile. “It’s just that, I don’t know what I should say.”

“You don’t know what you should say, this is unlike you.” Mo Han smiled. “Didn’t you like to talk in the past?”

“People will change.”

“Then you’ve changed too fast, it has only been ten days.”

Xia Qingyi made herself smile a little, not knowing how to answer him.

Mo Han saw how meek she looked, completely lacking the arrogance and bossiness she had initially, totally unlike the cheery and noisy Xia Qingyi who would fight over everything with him. He finished smoking his last cigarette and pressed the head of the cigarette onto a table next to him.

“Did he bully you?” Mo Han asked in a low voice.

Xia Qingyi raised her head and looked at him, not understanding why he would ask and only shook her head. “No, things are pretty okay.”

Mo Han smiled coldly. “Then, going to bed with him is something you’re willing to do?”

She stared at him disbelievingly. “What do you mean?”

“After going back to your old life, did you remember everything and start to be chummy with your husband? Can’t wait to put your hands on him in front of everyone?” Mo Han did not know why, but the memory of Han Liang helping her with her clothes kept replaying in his mind, and this irritated him to the point of making him become incredibly sharp-tongued.

Xia Qingyi said, “I can’t believe it, that there would be a day when I would hear such things coming out of your mouth.”

“I can’t believe it too, that you can get into your identity as a wife so quickly.”

Xia Qingyi was so furious that she kept panting. She did not want to speak with him and turned around and left, but Mo Han tightly grabbed onto her arm.

“Let me go!” She said in a low voice, using all her strength to get out of his grip.

“I won’t!” Mo Han looked at her.