I Was Sick of Loving You

8 – Ready

I fill the cut-out heart with happy memories, and write down the memories that have become dreams in my rough room.

It’s a mess of clear memories and blurry memories, but it doesn’t matter because the blurry memories aren’t important.

Unimportant hazy memories are collected separately, and the big flow is continued and completed.

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Looking at the completed flow, I look for the best to avoid a terrible nightmare.

If you can break her curse and achieve unrequited love, that will be the happiest. However, I know because I have experienced that it is extremely close to impossible. Draw a line and erase it.

After erasing it, the word breakup comes into view. Having failed once, the only option left is a slim chance.

A father who is not like a father will not allow the marriage breakup, and it is a failure to earn her hatred. So, in order to break off the marriage, the help of the royal family, stronger than that of the Duke of Brandt, is needed.

However, getting help from the imperial family was infinitely close to impossible.

It’s possible if I’m in a position like delicious meat, or if I can make a debt to one of the members of the imperial family. However, I do not have enough value to covet what the wild beast of the north has quietly put on its saliva. There was no incident that would create a debt to the imperial family.

An incident in which the princess is assassinated will occur next winter, but that is out of the question.

If I can solve it, I can seek help from the imperial family, but it was an incident that was not even revealed who did it until right before my death, so how can I solve it? It is impossible to prevent by even warning. Even if he tried to warn them, it would be difficult for the third son of a count family with no political foundation to have an audience with a member of the imperial family, and there was no way they would believe baseless words. Rather, if you get involved, there is a high probability of dying, so you should avoid it.

Cancel the marriage at the slim possibility.

With Haeju and the breakup erased, the only option left was to run away. It is an option that I withheld because I have to live the rest of my life running away from my father who has turned the top with compensation. It’s a flawed option, but it’s now the best option.

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Looking at the big flow, I choose a place where my father can’t reach.

Exile to Newdel Kingdom in the eastern part of the Empire. And how to escape into the realm of alien races and barbarians.

Exile to the Kingdom of Newdel, located in the eastern part of the Empire, is a matter of language and security. It is difficult to learn the language because the language system and pronunciation structure are different, and there is no time to bring an interpreter while learning. And it is only taking the shape of a country against the rebel forces that have been going on for 10 years, but it has turned into a lawless zone where you do not know when you will be stabbed.

The Newdel kingdom is withheld, and the territories of alien races and barbarians are classified.

Most of the areas classified have visited their territory in search of Haejubeop. Thanks to that, knowing the geography and way of life there, the situation is better than that of Newdel Kingdom.

And since there are more heterogeneous tribes and barbarian tribes interacting with the empire than expected, the language problem is not a big problem.

With that thought in mind, I scrutinize the areas I have classified and the information in my memory.

The heterogeneous tribes in the western great forest and grassland tend to be very exclusive to other tribes. Still, since beastmen revolve around the strong, it’s not bad as they respect people of other races to some extent as long as they have the strength. In addition, when a certain amount of trust is built up, it seems to be the best when you accept it as a member of the group.

However, in its current state, it will be put off for a while because it will be ignored or kicked out by beastmen with bodies far superior to human bodies.

The heterogeneous people in the south are fine because they are not exclusive to certain races, but their culture and lifestyle are so heterogeneous that it is difficult to adapt. The dissimilar tribes in the south also put it off for a while.

Withhold all other races, and see the realm of barbarians.

The place where the savages of the south are is out of the question because it is a hell full of disgusting people who enjoy cannibalism and offer live sacrifices.

Northern savages. Their lifestyle and culture are similar to those of the North, so it doesn’t matter too much. However, since you have to cross the North to get to the barbarians’ realm, there’s a chance it’ll get into her ears. So erase it.

The barbarians’ territory was all erased, and only the territory of the different races that had been withheld remained. The rest of the western tribes and the southern tribes were weighed and worried.

A southern heterogeneity with little exclusivity, but with a culture and lifestyle that are difficult to adapt to. A heterogeneous race in the west who is very exclusive, but respects and welcomes the strong.

Memories and thoughts about the two races pass by in a dizzying fashion, and the balance tilts towards the western territories of the different races.

Now that the scales have tipped, the time has come to make a move.

You must increase your strength. I have to train my body and mana, which can’t keep up with my mind yet. The body will be fine if you tune it through actual battles and training, but mana is not.

The amount of mana in the body was small, and the path the mana traveled was in a sloppy state, so only a few months or a year or two of training was not enough.

If you have a good elixir, you can achieve success quickly, but it’s expensive and hard to find in any way, so you should aim for the martial arts competition that will be held this time.

At the Colosseum in Vedinetio, the capital, martial arts competitions are held once every six months. Every time in that competition, though it is of a lower rank, an elixir is given as the winning prize. It’s an unwritten rule that no one with a certain level of fame will appear, so it’s worth aiming for the championship, and it’s not a real battle where you risk your life, but you can fight with decent people, so it’s not bad.

It’s a bit annoying to attract unnecessary attention, but there’s no opportunity like this, so you must aim for it. To organize my thoughts and go to the capital, I went to the office of the person who sold me.

I lightly knock on the luxurious door made of high-quality hardwood.

“I came because I have something to tell you.”

“Come in.”

Even though there are not many people who come to the office when you open the door and enter, a room decorated with useless fancy ornaments for self-satisfaction unfolds. The room seems to have been pulled out and put in as it is, a human whose vanity is greater than ability, and a sense of nausea rises.

“So, did you come here with a story about the princess?”

“It is not.”

When I said that the person was not related to the princess, her gaze shifted from me to the documents scattered on the desk.

“I plan to go up to participate in the next martial arts competition.”

As if he didn’t like what I said, fine wrinkles formed on his forehead and his gaze returned to me from the paperwork.

“Are you aware of your position? You are now the son-in-law of the Duke of Brandt.”

“I am fully self-aware.”

My answer must have aroused his temper more, his face reddened and his voice raised.

“What are you fully aware of! In the martial arts competition, murder is prohibited, and priests who have received miracles of healing are also called in to pay attention to safety, but people who die or become crippled every time come out. Do you know how much compensation our family will have to pay if you happen to be like that and the contract breaks down? At least the income of 3 years of our estate is gone!”

Seeing those eyes that just look at me as a commodity, I get annoyed.

“I am fully aware of that as well. If it is dangerous, I will withdraw immediately.”

“It doesn’t matter whether you abstain or not. What the Brandt family wants is a son-in-law who will remain silent and without influence. If you get caught by getting a reputation there, will you take responsibility?”

“There is no such thing as getting caught in a pod just because you gain fame. The reputation of the Duke of Brandt is not even a family that can become influential with the reputation that Darryl’s son-in-law has gained from martial arts competitions.

To meet that disgusting human gaze. The reputation that young warriors crave is reduced to the level of an option for a product. Lower me to the level of a stallion, and put me at eye level with that human. The human shuts his mouth, taps the desk with his fingers, ponders for a moment, then opens his mouth.

“Fuuu ok, you know better what you think, so take care of it yourself. However, don’t come because you’re hurt somewhere. Tsk, what do guys with knives like?”

“… All right. I’ve said everything I need to tell you, so I’ll go now.”

I was annoyed by the added words, but I ignored that feeling and tried to get out of this disgusting place where the business disappeared.

When I turned my back and opened the door, that person called me and stopped me.

“When I go to the capital, I will be staying with your brothers at the capital’s mansion, so check on their well-being. Even if a successor is decided, the children do not send a letter to their father.”

“All right.”

A sigh comes out when I close the door in a disgusting place.

My head aches at the thought of seeing older brothers who are not like me.

To be deprived of such things, the fate that oppresses me is too heavy and burdensome, so I erase the faces of those people from my head.

I cleared my head of useless things and moved on to prepare for what was to come.