I was born the Unloved Twin

"So many....soups..."

"Ow ow ow this is boring! Ow ow ow!!! Arms!"

"Keep stirring," I continue to threaten at the boys.

Remember everyone, child labor is really bad. Don't repeat this at home to innocent little children.

"I am innocent!!!" screams Lukas, red in the face from all the steam.

Being the size of kindergarteners, the boys have to be creative to be tall enough to reach all the soup pots. I myself, being tiny, am included in this not at all dangerous cooking.

It's not at all a safety hazard as Amar barefoots across the counter to handle 8 different simmering pots alone. One pot is too easy, keep stirring everyone!

Revenge smells like soup.

It's another busy winter day for me indoors, even at the troop's campgrounds. There's nothing quite like a steaming bowl of soup on a cold day. I'm sure it will be very much appreciated tonight in the cafeteria for dinner.

I have come up with the idea for a test kitchen! It's also built closer to a modern kitchen than these fireplace handles and grills. Such fire hazards with everyone's floppy clothes and bare hands.

Today's tester is soup! I may have admonished father on his bean craze a while back but it's actually a good idea given how easy they are to grow and keep in storage. Just don't tell father that. He doesn't have to know.

Soup is a very common dish for all social classes. It will grace every table in times of hardships and prosperity. In the summer and fall soup is green and colorful. In the winter it tends to be very brown and sad. It can't be helped since that's just what's available- beans and lentils.

We need to get some better food preservation going on here. Pickles maybe? Canning?

I'm still concerned about famines affecting the land. Even without famines to come, winter is a harsh thing to survive in these times.

I have so many things to test out in both famine research and just overall food improvement. I'd feel bad being in the way of either one of the kitchens all the time.

They've both very busy places, being the heart, soul, and stomach of each residence. It was much faster converting an unused outdoor kitchen into my test building at the troop's camp than it was to construct something in my manor home. Afterall there's a lot of hidden corners and probably magical space in here.

In order to improve the transportation time to and fro my home and the troops, there is now a 'wagon' shuttle schedule. Things are still being worked out with the new shuttle system but at least three times a day, a wagon departs from both locations transporting goods and people.

While I initially created it for me and my chefs, it seems like the hired tutors on both sides and father's accountants like the shuttle too.

Yay for improved relations and work efficiency! With all these people going back and forth on wheels, I am pleased to say more research is going into better paving roads and improving our shuttle.

Dirt is messy and cobblestone is too bumpy. I don't like them, my motion sickness does not like them. Grampa figure out the roads! Make me something asphalt-like or at least smoother to drive on. Father, you handle the wheels and wagons!

Good deal?

What?

I'm not smart enough to know the chemical composition and substitutes to make pavement. Or what road structure works best for the terrain with our current technology. That's grampa department.

I'm not some OP character that knows everything, sheesh. I don't even have proper magic! The most I can do is pipe on in about, I don't know, the curves and gutters to account for rain and snow. You know, the boring common sense stuff.

Do we have lime deposits? Can someone figure out concrete? Oh lime works for keeping eggs and stuff too! But so does salt, we have salt yes. Hmmm. I know we have a lot of mineral-rich clay, which is great for my beauty products.

Maybe I should post a reward on the bulletin board if anyone in the troops can bring forth a good enough idea? Huh....a patron reward system, like some science fair prize. Hmmmmm.

Likewise, the same with wagons or carriages. I don't know how they're structured or built. There's a lot of things I want to do or ideas to bring to this world but even if they're possible despite the tech gap, it's a lot of hard work to bring things into reality. Planning, drafting, commissioning, building - then there's figuring out what's wrong in those first, second, or third drafts, again and again.

I really lucked out having such a nerd for a father. He actually likes those kinds of things.

Though he did quip once about increasing the budget for parchment and paper costs.

Hey what is the paper market like? Papermills exist in certain places I recall but why are we still using parchment?

"There's a lot more animal skins around? You have lots of sheep and goat herds and not all of it is good for making leather. Paper is expensive here?"

"Gable uses both! He yells at me a lot to not waste parchment bc those are more magicy and stuff, like for his circle spells."

"Um, I don't know how paper is made or anything but it's more expensive around here? It's only made in certain places, right? Anyone can make parchment if they have skins or pulpy plants. Why don't they just harvest more paper plants? "

"Is paper made from plants? We can grow paper?! Gable never told me that! He always yells at me to not waste them!"

"I don't think there are plants that grow them but you use some plants to make paper? Same like clothes?"

The boys go back and forth, like chirping housewives over the stoves. If they have the energy to talk like this then my petty soup revenge is obviously not harsh enough. But the talk is interesting enough to move along my own brainstorming.

Hemp, flax, and cotton. Those are all common enough plants- and what I've gathered in my own clothing research. It's not just trees, those plants can and have been used in traditional papermaking on earth. It wouldn't be wrong to guess these as paper ingredients here either. We have water mills now with all of father's building projects, why can't we just make our own?

"Paper grows on trees too?!"

"It's just tree bark? Or it's made from it? I saw really white tree bark paper before, it was shiny and smoother than a deer hide."

"Whoa! How though? Trees are like brown and green and yellow and stuff!"

"I don't know? It gets clean when they boil it? Filters? Sugar and juice need filters so why not? I'm not sure? Rosalia do you know since you want your family to make papermills now too? I think the bulletin board reward thing will work too? They really need money after gambling too much."

"Stop reading my thoughts you two!" I screech, breaking up the boys, finally losing in with this conversation.

It's just creepy! I know I know I will fix this stupid thinking out loud habit of mine eventually! It's just hard when I don't even know when I'm doing it. Why does this body have such a weird habit?!

"We did not! You kept talking and asking things first!" complained Lukas, who looks a hilarious but concerning shade of pink.

I think he needs some water now. Ice. Go cool down frosty. That's enough soup sauna for you. Remember child labor is dangerous and bad.

"Lukas...can you read thoughts? Gable?" questioned Amar, as if the thought suddenly made him scared.

"What?! No! But that would be so cool!"

"Wait wait wait can Gable read thoughts? Can anyone? Grampa is oddly.....knowledgeable sometimes. Is that a magic thing?"

Oh great now I'm scared! Sure Gable and grampa know about my special circumstances but there's a lot of sensitive info in my head okay. Stuff I know for sure I don't mutter out loud and should not see the light of day. Information I don't even know how to organize yet, those are issues for future Rosalia. It's also a privacy concern!

"Guys, reading thoughts would be so so really cool but I don't think Gable can do that. He and Cap' would catch me a lot more when I do things they tell me not too!"

"..."

"Oh. That makes sense too!"

Yes....yes it does actually. Thank you Lukas for your very blunt words of comfort. That is very true, in how Gable just would not allow even a quarter the shenanigans Lukas manages to get himself into. How did he get stuck inside that tree that one time? I expect there to be a magical equivalent of a GPS tracking camera on the troublesome boy any day now.

I also should not let unfounded fear and paranoia take me over like a certain other day. Cursed kitti.

Huh is this how grampa often feels?

....Naaaaaahhhh he's just crazy.

"There's a lot of things we don't know about. Maybe somewhere out there there is someone who can read all thoughts?" nods Amar.

"Ahhh scary. I don't wanna think about. It's good enough if gramps and Gable can't."

"But cooooooooool."

No no no Lukas not cool. Very bad. Bad for me.

The door bursts open, letting in a cold draft.

"No one burned anything right?!" shouts out Georgie, a basket of bread clutched to his arms.

His ragged condition makes my heart hurt... in fashion! What a waste of such beautiful clear skin and carefully conditioned hair. He needs new clothes that aren't hideously medieval soon. If I am to keep him around as my assistant he must look the part, even when busy!

"No Georgie, close the door! It's chilly."

"No we're too awesome for that!"

"No? I think pot number 14 is a little burnt? It was the onions but Rosalia says she likes them kinda burning."

"Browning. I said I like them browning."

That's where the aroma is! The deliciousness. Only with proper time and heat can the true deliciousness of grilled onion be brought out and incorporated into other dishes. Simple children don't understand yet the magic of searing, yellowing and cooking with grilled onions!

"Oh. Well, it smells burning."

"...*sigh* Burnt, you mean 'it smells burnt'." I correct Amar's childish grammar.

"You think so too right?"

"That's not what I meant. I said-"

Georgie takes the bait and finally tastes the soup to shut us up. Good because he has more to taste soon. It's not a very fair vote if it's among the three of us.

"Whatever is in this pot is burnt yeah."

Curses. Well that's what the test kitchen is for. Shut up Amar, stick that tongue back in your mouth or I'll make you smell fermenting cheese again.

Along with the wonderful breadbasket Georgie has brought along, with Mr. Boaregous's research results, are some more supplies to stock the tester kitchen. My little assistant took quite a while with balancing everything.

Maybe soup pots were all we could do right now until I get more supplies? Who knows? Maybe I really wanted to make all this soup and stews? Who knows.

Either way, I want bread bowls now for my soupy. Gimmie the sourdough one.

"Wait. What in the world are you going to do with all this!?" Georgie waves around, gesturing to the who knows how many cooked soup pots and already tested experiments.

"It's 57 pots and 30 pans? Lukas spilled 3."

"Those ones sucked anyways!"

Thank you calculator, I am writing that down. Father gave me another blank ledger. Unfortunately for me though I fear it is quite expensive to produce books of any kind, empty or not. Hmmm, another thing to research.

"You can't just waste food like that!" Georgie screeches.

We don't ignore him, but it's just very normal of him to nag. I completely understand, those teenaged mood swings sure are bad for you.

There there Georgie, why don't you have some bread and calm down? May I recommend the ciabatta? Or the crunchy pane di matera? I think the bakers did a good job on that one, replicating my ideal deliciousness.

Figs and grape yeast really do work well, glad we got more yeasts to play with. Good job me!

Yay for bread!

"We tested enough Georgie, I got enough research. We can just give the rest to the troops during dinner. Also my tongue is bored. "

"Mine too, all I taste are bland beans. My arms hurt."

"Me too! And bored! I want the dark rye bread for mine!"

"Is there any lavash? Or roti?"

Throwing over the still warm crunchy bread to Lukas was no issue but turning the thing into an actual bread bowl was. Bread bowls are fun and tasty, stop being so sad about the lack of flatbread Amar. It's loafy bread bowl day! Geez kids can be so picky about the littlest things.

lt's also a really common way to eat among the locals. Saves on dishes, or if they don't have dishes, acts in place of one. I should make some for father as bribes. I think he would enjoy the 'commoner's' novelty.

"You can't just give ppl pots of beans!? What are people going to do with all these!"

Actually we were more planning on dumping everything together into one vat. Create one 'super monster bean soup', as Lukas calls it, to cover up the experimental mess. Stirring it all is very muscle building.

Good news, I have isolated some beans I would prefer to cultivate taste-wise. Father's research notes, which were generously provided and organized by Alfonso, helped out too.

Better news- these odd little brown beans I have found are a bit naturally sweet! We have dessert beans! Knock off adzuki beans have been identified. I shall have my bean paste for new sweets soon enough. So much potential.

Wait a bit longer tummy. You shall soon have anpan again.

So what if there's a little bit of a mess to clean up after? As long as I don't have to clean it. I'm using my young miss card here.

Now that Georgie is here, however, the next experiment can begin.

"Georgie. If you would be so kind...I command you to identify the best soup!"

"Out of....these?" again, he gestured to the room of pots and pans.

Huh, the more I look at it the more I realize that maybe I went over the top on bean testing. Just maybe. Oh well, good luck to whoever is on dish duty.

"Of course not- those were the experiments. These over here are lunch. Now pick!"

For some odd reason, Georgie looks fearful.

How silly, it's just soup. No need to be scared. You just need to pick the best one, which is obviously mine. Come on, it's easy. Just go for the best, that creamy rich clam chowder. It obviously stands out.

That richness, that flavor of fresh juicy clam meat melding with thick rich cream and bits of bright vegetables. How could anyone resist?! It beats these kiddies' basic pots by leaps and bounds! I have just created this world's first clam chowder, the perfect thing for bread bowls! Bwahahaha!

Before Georgie can rightfully crown me the rightful winner of this petty soup side competition, he screams and hollers, going terribly red in the face. I think he's even choking a little....ok a lot. Is he alright?

"I didn't do it! Mine's the bacon cabbage one!" shouts out Lukas, quick to defend himself.

"I think it's mine?" Amar bends his little head, quickly sliding a half-used pitcher of milk over to my choking assistant chef. To which Georgie is now hastily drowning himself in.

"What did you put it there? I thought it was mostly beans and tomatoes. Georgie breathe! Georgie no, I spent too much time and money on your beauty to have you die!"

Of course, he's not really dying. Just maybe on fire, at least his face and neck are. Is it spicy? We have spicy?!

Like idiots, the three of us spend a few seconds watching Georgie literally cry tears of intense pain, unable to utter a comprehensible word, then proceed each stuff a spoonful of danger into our own mouths.

Awww I'm disappointed, it's not that spicy at all. Paprika, black pepper, something else....but not really spicy after the first 3 seconds. Just a nice initial warmth, which is still very good given this world's standards on spice. The kids look fine too, slurping along. Why is Georgie acting like he's had a 5 alarm chili?

"I only put in one dried chile? It was really little, he could have eaten it whole? That might hurt yeah."

"YOU HAD CHILES?! There were chiles in this kitchen? Where?!"

"They were strung up in the corner over there."

"What are chilis and why is everyone going kookoo over it?! Is it yummy? Georgie doesn't make it look like it was very yummy, he looks red and dead. Ooooh is it a new weapon!?"

Georgie is doing a great job with babysitting, really. Very qualified at this point.

I'm sure whoever walked in right at this moment would be treated to such a nice sight. Surrounded by soup pots, a red faced teenaged boy groans in pain as he drowns in another jug of milk while some small children play fight among themselves over open stove flames.

That's what the messenger boy saw at least, sliding the door open after constantly ignored knocking. Whatever smart opening message he had prepared was stuck in his throat as he registered the scene.

Except for Georgie, the intrusion had the rest of us looking up. I can't help but narrow my eyes and seethe a bit in displeasure.

"Phillipe!"

Lukas cheers, perking up like a little boy who has spotted a friend. As if there was nothing odd at all about this sudden appearance.

What is he doing here, especially in my private test kitchen? I need to up security somehow. Shouldn't Philippe have gone back with his family for the winter? Unlike some others, he doesn't need to stay here really.

"I do beg pardon for interrupting~ I've been sent to deliver a message." the little redhead recites, no faults to be found in his manner.

In front of me stands a miniature version of my so very recognizable 'gentleman' fiend of a cousin. One I know very well from a lifetime of childhood rivalry, despite our little age gap. With his carrot-apple hair and sapphire blue eyes, a contrast that really does stand out against a neutral fair skin tone. Baby cheeks hide that scholarly refined bone structure to come but that dreadfully sharp nose is still there, a haughty sneer hiding behind his good boy smile.

What a shame- he would be such a good skin and hair model with that coloring. But he's my cousin! Can't use him.

He's a clean little kid, about the same age as the kindergarteners yet already so much more polished and polite. Very much a nobleman's son alright. Every part of his bearing, from his fine dress to the tip of his sharp little nose, screams money and practice. Many parents would love such a seemingly smart and well-behaved boy.

Thus, I don't like him. Can't trust him. What kid talks like that on their own?

Before I can even decide how to proceed, Lukas' jumps, a flurry of excited questions and random ramblings spilling from his chirping mouth.

It's a little adorable how happy Lukas looks but something is obviously off in how Phillipe reflects off the chatter. It's a rather one way conversation. There's also the blank reaction from Amar, who innocently blinks but otherwise only watches the exchange rather than join in.

With a charming little smile, Phillipe turns to address the room, more like the host rather than a mere messenger as he so claimed.

"One of the senior teachers is calling for you Amar. You have a lot of make up work and chores."

"Oh ok." slurps Amar, far more interested in lunch than the news or even the news runner. His lack of a reaction highlighted the tenseness that a young immature Phillipe fails to fully hide. How suspicious.

"You should go now." enunciated Phillipe.

"Ok."

"Madam Damia won't be pleased if you dawdle."

"Ok."

"It's terribly rude to keep an honored teacher waiting."

I bite into my bread, watching the new show presented to me. I'm not alone, by now Georgie seems to have recovered and quietly observes with a quiet expression of concern.

Philippe is obviously up to something, but what? Something tells me this isn't just a messenger run. The fact that he's still here in the troops' campground instead of a carriage ride back to his home or on some vacation is already a red flag. This is the first time I've seen him so close in this life without our parents around. He may be very young now but I can't underestimate him.

What did father say to do around adults and Bicchieris? Play dumb?

My reputation is rather infamous around the troops but that's just that, reputation. I never really interact much with the few kids here, let alone the young ones closer to my current age. I most certainly take note to avoid my blood relative.

I can still see him as I last remember. Feel the way my neck curves painfully, catching the hand that dared take a sword upon my back.

He always knew how to play dirty. I wasn't much better in our academic competitions and dealings but really now? Behind a lady's back? His swooning fangirls would be taken ill at the improper show of chivalry.

But that's not a grown Phillipe standing there, not yet.

"Ok. I know."

Amar finishes his bowl without much hurry, stuffing another bread into his mouth before hopping down the counter.

He munches and takes more food to go, waving us goodbye as usual. There are no secret codes or messages to his usual smiling expression. In fact, he walks around rather casually. That's the most interesting thing.

The kid is taking his sweet time lingering around when normally he runs off and disappears in a few blinks. Oh ho ho ho I see. Amar is teasing our unexpected guest, and it's somehow working at making Phillipe uncomfortable. I don't know what's going on here but I am quite enjoying how my cousin clenches his little fists where he thinks people won't notice.

"Sorry for the soup Georgie, I hope you feel better. Bye Lukas. Bye Rosa. "

Only when he's far gone does my cousin let out an uncomfortable breath, dropping his smile into something a bit more dire looking. I continue to play dumb, just a pretty little child gnawing on bread. I don't notice anything at all, nope. Georgie have some bread, it will calm you down and help that burning.

"Impertinent.... Are you all quite alright?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't we be?" asks Lukas, a little confused but again he goes ignored as Phillipe turns to our unofficial babysitter.

"You there serf, how dare you place the young lady on there! It's filthy and dangerous. Get her down!"

Georgie bristles at the tone. While he's moved from the milk puddle to stand by my side, he makes no motion to move me. Nor would I allow him too. It's perfectly safe on this counter! What gives?

"Who are you?" I tilt my head in mock ignorance.

Play dumb Rosalia. You are a dumb sweet baby toddler, you are a Lilyanne. Do not throw a pot at his head.

"Rosa! This is Phillipe! He's really smarts and stuff and like has all the other boys listening to him super easy and his house is really far and big and has lots of fancy glass things-"

"How dare you!"

Finally, Lukas is deemed worthy of his attention. Gotta hand it to him, the kid stays hyper and friendly through the entire unpleasant exchange, even if he's a looks a little lost. That gives Phillipe enough of an opening to lecture on.

"That is the young Lady of the house Ventrella. My own blood relations. How dare you address a noble, especially a girl as such! Know your place!"

"My what? That's just Rosa! And that's Georgie!"

"Hmmmpf! Since you were selected on that raid trip your ill-bred arrogance has risen. I see you got far worse with your apprenticeship! As expected from an unknown commoner, even if you did come from a recommendation."

"Why are you being so yelly Phillipe?! Oh are you still mad that you didn't get picked on that raid? That was like forrreever ago. Amar said you were butthurt and there are more raids and dungeons to see! Can't you go to one of your family's land's dungeons? Oh can we go?!"

"Silence! I did not give you permission to speak to me! Apologize to both myself and my young cousin!"

"Ohhh you really are still butthurt. Hehee I like that word. I don't think I have to say sorry for being stronger though! I got picked because of that! And I got to meet my new master! Oh Oh oh and my new master said that it's actually really bad if I hold back my strength because then I don't learn how to practice it! But you said before that I had to if I wanted to play because those were the rules but Amar and Gab- er my master said those were dumb rules! So let's practice training 100%!"

"Silence imbecile! Your mindless chatter is dirtying the air."

"Nooooo that's the smell of beans. Right Rosa?! We made lots of soup! Do you want soup?! Mine's yummiest because of bacon. and no one else used bacon. "

"You!!!!"

Pffffft I flipping love Lukas' nonsense and how they trip up Phillipe. Okay, it's decided, I need to keep his loud mouth around just for Phillipe. Hey hey hey that's your former loyal henchman there dear cousin! I don't know how you did it a lifetime ago if his chatter angers you this much already!

Ah, but do I detect a hint of jealousy behind his insults.

Right, Amar and Lukas are the only kids in their age range allowed on such missions. What little terrors, as Gable so fondly call us....Hey wait why was I included in that description?

There are no normal easy to kill people inside these troop walls. While the Phillipe I know isn't weak, I can't say he was particularly very strong? At least not that I saw. Rather than dirtying himself with some more unsavory missions he was often milling around the right circles and parties or chose prestigious and glamorous sounding adventures to add to his resume.

"It's useless to waste my breath on attempting to polish or educate you. I thought you had what it took once. Until you were dirtied and led astray."

"Of course I have what it takes, I have all the takes! We weren't astray, Cap was just taking us on a really long camping trip and there I got to meet my teacher and it's really fun and cool but I can't say everything because then he'll be mad again and then chickens."

"Imbecile!? Did you not intake a thing I said?!"

Despite his rudeness and confusion, there's something rather childishly fond in Phillipe's expression. Though he did his best to ignore Lukas previously and even defended my supposed honor, he hasn't looked back at me once. Lukas is just too attention-grabbing, his little cloud of pale hair and overdone enthusiasm overtaking the room.

Ah, Phillipe you must have really wanted to add Lukas into your collection. I have no idea why but you honestly do, even at this young age.

Too bad so sad. I don't like what you did to him in the last life so I'll just be handing him over to Gable now.

Let's see what is a normal dumb baby to do? As amusing and informational as this situation is I can see a bad time is escalating.

"Scawy! *hic hic* Georgwie it too loud and scawy!"

What a good little assistant, he only shivers violently for 2 seconds before taking me into his arms , playing along with my act.

"Yes it is quite the commotion, all from...a mere messenger. There there now young miss Rosalia, don't cry, don't let the mean boy make you cry."

"Too scawy! Meanie carwot so loud an scawy...mean to big bruders!"

"Oh noes, the meanie carrot scared you! Don't cry now! You might get him in trouble."

"Waaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!! Scway!!!! Meanie loud and scawi!!!! Save bruder Lukas from meanie!"

How's that? Is that a passable Lilyanne imitation?

I think I may have actually shocked Lukas into a moment of silence though. What is it with most people getting horrified when I actually act my age!?

"Hmmmpfff, playing with commoners! You there serf, don't teach her awful things! She's too young to know any better but I am her cousin and a noble, your master by default! How dare you address me as such! Or allow your mistress among such filthy low borns!"

"WWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH Scawy!!!!!!!"

Oh no, a pot of super bean soup has gone flying in my distress. Oh dear, oh no. Wherever shall it land? I'm a crying toddler, what is aiming?

Plop

What a coincidence! My toddler strong arms from soap and soup making have somehow flung it right at Phillipe! Oh nooooooooo.

"Oh no. What a mess." drawls Georgie, voicing out my true thoughts in his monotone voice. Take over Georgie! I'm busy playing my part with my maidenly baby tears.

The spectacle, however, was enough to have a bean soaked Phillipe huffing and puffing away indigently, though not without another general insult.

Good riddance!

"What was that about?" I turn and ask, finally putting a stop to my act.

"What do you mean was that?! What was THAT!" screams back Lukas, referring to my little cry play.

Eh he'll get used to it. Georgie has.

"How else would I get him to go away? Crying works really well on boys and adults, watching my sister taught me that. Why are you nice to him when he was so awful?"

"Phillipe? He's not uh awful? Just butthurt and weird sometimes but he's really nice to me, or he was. A lot better than the other kids and he doesn't say I'm annoying or make me go away. I don't know why he's still mad. Ok I do know a little because I talk too much and he says I look cooler when I keep quiet and he'll be my friend but it's really really hard to keep shut and nice. But that doesn't make sense either because Amar knows really well how to keep quiet and nice but Phillipe still doesn't like him and-"

And on and on he goes, when Lukas will stop no one knows. Ah, we must never let him get captured and interrogated, he spills so easily and without a care. How nice and refreshing it must be living in his head.

"So he'll only be your friend if you keep quiet and nice?" I try to simplify.

"That's! No! I don't know?"

"That doesn't sound very nice. Or much like a friend. You don't have to keep quiet around Rosalia or Amar? Nor me? I mean there's a difference between you children needing to behave because oh by the gods are you just messes but....that doesn't sound right." replies Georgie, making sense of it all.

"I don't know! I didn't have any friends before I came here."

Ow ow ow sad cuteness strike to the heart. Two birds, one stone. Georgie and I are the birds. Ow ow ow, someone fix this.

"I don't know but I know he doesn't like it very much when I do better on tests and exercises. And he really doesn't like it when Amar gets called on for private training, which is weird because why do you want more work?! It's really hard because he gets mad when I do good but if I don't do get then...then it gets bad. "

"I get it. He doesn't like people being better than him." I state, more from personal experience than anything.

"I don't know.....maybe. I'm the best though?! So I got picked on raids, and no one else is allowed because it's not safe if you're not strong enough."

Ah, good old Phillipe, very predictable, even at this age. He was always the first to rub it in my face when I failed at something versus him or Lilyanne. Always knew where to hit it where it hurts another insecure child the most. Huh, interesting?

Is that's what's going on here?

"Does he....tell the other boys not to play with you?"

"No! He helps me play with them! Oh...but he says not to play with Amar, and that's not cool even if it's because he's all mad and butthurt."

"The others actually listen to him?"

"Yeah it's so cool how he has so many friends that follow him and stuff!"

"I've...never seen that, and I think I've been around the troops a lot."

"That's silly Rosa. You only play around with the adults and teenagers! Which is super cool because Philippe can't do that, he's just with the small kids who aren't allowed to do much. They're nice when we play but it gets boring a lot. You're extra small and you do all sorts of fun things!"

The wheels are turning in my little brain as are the ones in Georgie. I don't like the sound of this at all.

"And you still want to be his friend? Even when he talks down on you like that? I know I tease and yell at you too but, not like that. "

"Um...yeah? I know you're all just joking!"

"I'm sorry. I'll do better to not call you mean things. How he talks to you is not ok. That's not a very good friend."

"But...we just joke yell alot...so...he..."

Lukas looks like he's confronting a rather difficult homework problem, despite his words there's a lot of uncertainty to his manner.

"Does Rosalia or Amar ever make you feel that Lukas? Do I? Or anyone in your life? Do they make you feel like you're not good enough as you are so you have to fake being a certain way to make them like you?" asks Georgie, sounding very mature.

"No! You guys are different and it's really fun! But that's normal because I'm not good enough at doing some things or acting or else....I don't know..."

"Have you talked about this with others? Your guardian?"

By now Georgie has long stopped fake rocking me, picking up Lukas as well. He may not look like it but this little jr. chef of mine is very motherly isn't he?

"No! Because it's not cool."

"A lot of things aren't cool! You kids making all these dishes to wash is not cool! How that Phillipe brat, noble or not, talks to you and me is not cool! Did he even call you your name once?"

"Georgie's right. It's not cool at all. It...sounds like bullying. You should talk to Gable too....he's helped solve a lot of things right? He can do it again...but he can't read your mind so you have to tell him. When you go back, you have to tell him everything ok?"

"But that's a lot and!!!....okay fine. I'll just ask Gable or something," he mumbles near the end, almost curling into himself in the nook of Georgie's arm.

Oh dear.

A strange mood as settled since Phillipe's unexpected appearance. Some knots and kinks under the surface. Lukas is now oddly depressed, my Georgie is simmering his fussy anger, and I have a lot more work to do. More than just beans. Amar definitely knows more to this drama that I have been blissfully ignorant of and inferring from Luka's ramblings, he's just as involved.

Dear cousin, it looks like I won't be able to play dumb with you for long. See these are my minions, this is my territory, and you're the one that doesn't belong. Are you ready to play with me again?

It will be just like old times.

 

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