I Ship My Adversary X Me

Chapter 22

Edited by Isalee

347.

Gu Yiliang saw the change in my expression, and leant over in curiosity to look at my phone before laughing. “Ah, I didn’t explain it clearly to her, she misunderstood.”

Wait, no. Then what are you still laughing about? Quick, shouldn’t you explain it now?

He thought about it. “But this is fine too. If there’s something, we can even get her to cover for us. Just let her treat you as the lady boss then.”

Just now, it had taken him so much effort just to say the word boyfriend, but now he was so comfortable saying the words lady boss? What was there to cover for us? Did we have to get all our people involved in this professional relationship of ours? …

But all these were not the key points.

I was already used to him shoving the huge amount of fluff in my face periodically. Without a change in my expression, I secretly enjoyed this piece of fluff, then looked at him sulkily. “Why am I the lady boss? Get her to change it change it hurry up and change it!”

“Oh.” He looked down at his phone and sent a few messages.

348.

My phone vibrated with an Alipay message, and I glanced down at it.

It was a message from Gu Yiliang’s assistant. “Sorry, sorry, I greeted you wrongly just now! Thank you, Sister-in-law1!!”

Me: “…”

Gu Yiliang, you’re getting your people to fool me, right?! I’m going to sic Little Chen on them!

349.

With a few taps, I sent Little Chen a Wechat message, the content being that from next month onwards, his salary would come from Gu Yiliang.

My phone vibrated. Little Chen’s response came very quickly.

OrangeWarmSun: Oh great! This progress is so fast! Yanyan is so impressive, help me thank Brother-in-law2!

350.

I blacklisted him.

351.

Although Gu Yiliang did not see Little Chen’s reply, seeing how my face changed even more, he smiled and reached out, wanting to pinch my face.

Just as he lifted his hand, he stiffly put it back down slowly. Vapidly, he spoke, “Mn… Then, good night?”

“Mn, sure.” It was already late at night. I stood up, walking to the door. “Isn’t there a shoot for a magazine tomorrow afternoon? Sleep earlier, and get a bit more rest, then you’ll look good on camera.”

He stood up as well, walking me to the door. “You too. Remember to prepare a few sets of your personal clothes just in case.”

I opened the door, heading out. “The drama leads are all going. What could possibly happen? Don’t worry, don’t worry.”

He followed me out. “Mn. If you’re not able to sleep well, I have a steam eye-mask that’s pretty comfortable. I’ll prepare some for you next time.”

I nodded gratefully. “Sure, sure. I have an essential oil to aid sleep that’s pretty good as well, I’ll get some for you next time.”

I stopped outside my own room, and he too stopped outside my room.

I took out my card, opening the door and walking a few steps in. He too, hesitantly walked a few steps in.

352.

What was this, a pair of lovers reluctant to part3?

I looked at him, baffled. “Why, is there something else?”

He looked at me, a little reluctant. Thinning his lips, he bit on them, then leaned forward slightly before returning to his original position. He seemed rather awkward, and in the end he scratched his head in frustration.

I did not really understand what exactly he was trying to do. He definitely was not trying to kiss me, and so I ventured, “If there’s nothing else, we’ll adjourn our meeting?”

He studied me for a bit, looking as though he was both sighing, as well as heaving a breath of relief. Then he said, “Good night.”

He was tossing and turning about for so long just to say this?

I blinked. I really understood less and less of this guy.

353.

Sincerely bidding Gu Yiliang good night, I finally sent off this buddha.

I swiftly removed my makeup, bathed, washed my face, and completed my entire skincare regimen, then picked up my phone preciously.

An utterly exhausting day was finally over! It was time to treat myself!

354.

With those two shocking Weibo posts, and today’s unrivalled broadcast, although I had been counselled by Gu Yiliang’s words that were filled with certainty, I still could not help but feel anxious.

So, despite how eager I was to consume more fluff, I still had to first take a look at any hashtags about Gu Yiliang and me. After that, I went to search our names along with the key phrases from the broadcast.

355.

All in all, it was fine, everything was fine.

The fans’ filter was extremely powerful, as well as blind. They still loved us deeply. Fans grabbed onto every single detail and squealed all over them, while anti-fans grabbed onto every single detail to smash us down. A few hid in their idol’s hashtags and posted some ambiguous statements nervously. Those who loved, loved, while those who hated, did so. Nothing changed because of this one broadcast, and it was peaceful and prosperous everywhere.

356.

Maybe I was worrying excessively. The two of us were not A-listers, and the image of us being rivals who could not exist simultaneously together for the past three years had been imprinted deeply in people’s minds. Not many people actually believed in the sudden fanservice. The consensus was that we were just mending fences like normal people. With the army of commentators that Sister Man bought to reap benefits in this situation, acting as mediators, along with the degree of fanservice we performed, fuel was added to this flame, and our situation turned into a very moving bromance.

As for those “ambiguous” words and actions, it became like the movie Rashomon, where fans of us as individuals and fans of us as a bias all had their own opinions and ideas. Their analyses were rational and logical. From our micro-expressions to the words we used, countless deductions were made, and each one sounded very plausible.

In any case, in the eyes of our separate, idol fans, no matter what the ship’s fans said, they thought that they were seeing things through the eyes of fujoshis. In the eyes of the ship’s fans, no matter what the idol fans said, they were just being blind to true love. Each stuck to their own argument, and neither could convince the other.

357.

Very good. Continue analysing, continue fantasising, continue maintaining such drive to seek the truth yet drifting further and further away from it!

358.

Feeling a load vanishing from my heart, I wondered if the Niangzi Army had any new output. It should be like the New Year for them, right?

As I hummed a tune, I tapped into the Niangzi forum.

Then I received a wave of mental attack and a baptism.

359.

How was this the Niangzi Army only celebrating the New Year?

They were celebrating National Day!

360.

My question: How many possibilities could surface from a 60-minute broadcast by two people?

The Niangzi Army gave me the answer: Unlimited.

A Niangzi Army member said, “It’s an entire 60 minutes of the essence of fluff! I played Truth is Real on loop seventeen times!”

The fluff came in hard and fast — the Q&A section had already been added to the archives. Based on our physical strengths, it had been decided who was the top and the bottom, and their bias personally sang the ship’s official song.

That scene where Gu Yiliang was lying on me? They even managed to flawlessly photoshop my legs around his waist. I surrendered.

This was a fruitful year, and this was an impressive nation.

Although such obvious fluff had already been scattered upon the audience, there were still some people who could never be satisfied, fighting bravely on the frontlines of digging even deeper for fluff.

There were girls with magnifying glasses going frame by frame seeking fluff, there were calculators counting the number of times our bodies came into contact with each other, there were tuners who autotuned Gu Yiliang’s offkey voice, there were sharp-eared girls who resolutely said that my “p-p-please” was “d-d-dear”4, there were appraisers who asserted that the mosquito bite on my collarbone was a hickey—

361.

There were even psychologists who were certain that Gu Yiliang was jealous of my assistant.

I burst out laughing.

362.

That’s it, Niangzi is rio.

No one was allowed to doubt it, no objection was allowed.

The one who found out the “truth” first, WilLiam, who had been mocked yesterday, now had an infinite future in front of her. With one step, she became the founder of the nation, or the biggest winner around.

363.

As I enjoyed all the fluffy moments gleefully, I suddenly recalled that I even joined a group that stan-ed Niangzi, and so I entered the group chat to take a look.

It was fine if I didn’t look, but now I was alarmed.

It was probably because there were too many fluffy moments. This group chat, unlike the one on Weibo, was not on a public forum. Everyone in the group was extremely excited. On average, after about every three sentences, there would be a fic heading off into smutty territory.

Eh? These ladies were so young, yet they knew way too much about such matters!

As I read, my face and ears burned red. Quickly, I scrolled down the chatlog, but as my memory was way too good, every word was burnt into my brain. Gu Yiliang’s face suddenly popped into my head.

364.

I locked my phone, calming myself down.

Then I unlocked my phone and continued searching for more fluff to enjoy.

365.

I carefully filtered out all the NSFW words, and then discovered that there was a member of the Niangzi army named SilentMoonWilLiam who kept posting. She seemed very well respected, and would even periodically upload some exposés she claimed was 100% true.

There were things like Gu Yiliang and I have been together since we were seventeen, that we already registered our marriage overseas, that I bought a small apartment in Amsterdam and gifted it to him as a birthday present, that I had a fever over the New Year, and Gu Yiliang drove from hundreds of miles away to come to the city I was in to visit me…

…

Compared to these, Gu Yiliang getting jealous of Little Chen was even more believable.

I scrolled all the way down, and saw the newest discussion.

366.

SilentMoonWilLiam: They’ll probably spend the New Year next year together as well.

NiangziArmy1: +1

NiangziArmy2: Definitely heeheehee without Liangliang’s smile, how would Yanyan be able to fall asleep

NiangziArmy3 : 【Message is too NSFW the system has automatically blocked it】

Yantastic: … When have they ever spent the New Year together?

SilentMoonWilLiam: *points to the forum* Newbie, go forth and explore!

Yantastic: I’ve looked through it already. Those exposés don’t seem accurate? During last year’s New Year, Yanyan was on an overseas vacation with his family, and there’s even photo evidence of it on his Instagram.

SilentMoonWilLiam: The location wasn’t tagged in that photo. One look and you’ll know it was an old photo that he posted to hoodwink people~

Yantastic: I just searched through photos that other people posted around the same time, take a look at the advertisement on the signboard 【image】

SilentMoonWilLiam: Yanyan did not appear in the photo~ It’s a photo he borrowed from others~

Yantastic: Isn’t this a little too far-fetched?

SilentMoonWilLiam: Do you not believe that Niangzi are already together?

Yantastic: ?

Yantastic: They’re not together in the first place.

SilentMoonWilLiam: Then, may I ask, why did you join this forum?

WilLiam: Please, don’t argue.

367.

I could sincerely feel her unhappiness and threat from her tone, and was rather baffled.

SilentMoonWilLiam: If you have any exposé, just post it. If you don’t, don’t come and question other people’s relationships.

Yantastic: …

But there’s not even a relationship between Gu Yiliang and me to question?!

I thought I should just appease the young lady, and so slowly typed a message out.

Yantastic: I do have something.

Yantastic: The salaries of their personal assistants are paid by each other.

SilentMoonWilLiam: Hah, is there any point in coming up with such an obviously fake exposé? Aren’t you afraid of cracking your teeth on fake fluff? Goodbye.

【You’ve been kicked.】

368.

What the fuck.

369.

Me, an involved party? Refuted the fake éxpose? Posted a piece of genuine fluff? Then got kicked out by the fangroup of my own CP?

Hello? Could this world be anymore fantastical?

370.

I stared at the screen incredulously, not knowing if it was this world that was crazy, or if I was the crazy one.

WilLiam privately sent me a few messages, but I could not be bothered to look at them. Deeply depressed, I sprawled across my bed, gloomily questioning the meaning of life.

We really were not together in the first place. How could this be my fault?

371.

My phone vibrated, then vibrated a few more times.

With nothing to live for, I unlocked my phone, tapped into Wechat, and realised that it was Gu Yiliang looking for me.

372.

Liam: Are you asleep yet?

Liam: I’ve signed some phone covers already, and I’ll bring some for you tomorrow to sign as well before handing them to the company for a lucky draw.

Liam: I’ve only signed my Chinese name for the fans. Your version is the special edition ^^

Liam: Good night, sweet dreams

373.

I dazedly look at that silly emoji, slowly locked my screen, and rolled from one edge of my bed to the other.

Then I again rolled from that edge back to this edge.

And repeated it countless times.

After that, I slowly unlocked my phone, and told him good night.

Then I pulled my blanket up over my head.

374.

I get to enjoy fluff that was specially given to me by my CP! When I’m not in a good mood, my CP will personally coax me out of it! All the fluff I get to enjoy is all real and genuine!

You guys can just go gorge yourself on that artificial fluff!

Ha! Ha! Ha!