I Possessed the Heroine’s Teacher

I tried not to care, but I have to admit that engagement ceremonies are nerve-wracking. I couldn’t even drink a sip of water properly. I saw Melchior, Melissa, and Glacies talking to the guests, but I had nothing to say to them. I couldn’t just go up to strangers and ask, ‘What’s your favorite anime? Is it Iron-Blooded Orphans? That guy’s a crazy bastard.’ and punch them with Confucian punches.

I wanted the ceremony to end quickly so I could relax and eat. I hadn’t eaten anything since morning, and I was hungry, but it felt awkward to go out and eat something. This is why international marriages are not recommended. I don’t know anyone here, so I’m just sitting here uncomfortably.

“Aren’t you hungry, Werner?”

It was Melchior. He brought a plate full of roasted goose meat and soft butter biscuits, all of Werner’s favorites.

“How did you know I was hungry, brother?”

“You haven’t eaten anything since morning.”

“Haa… You’re so considerate.”

I sighed and took the plate, using a fork to pick up a piece of goose meat. It was a bit cold, but the salty taste and soft texture suited my taste, or rather Werner’s taste. The butter biscuits were also buttery, crispy on the outside, and moist on the inside, just like Garrosh Hellscream.

“Werner… Are you really okay with this?”

“The die has been cast.”

“Don’t decide your life with a dice roll. Especially when it comes to marriage, it’s an important matter.”

“I can’t even use grand magic, and I can’t join the journey to cure Media’s illness. I have to live as it goes.”

Then, a heavy blow struck my head. I wondered if Werner’s head had finally cracked from the continuous blows, unable to withstand the constant shocks.

The person who hit my head was none other than Melissa. That damn child in a vampire skin was trying to kill me.

“Don’t treat my daughter as a choice in your ‘live as it goes’ life, little brother. And we will definitely find a way to fix your body.”

How do they plan to treat Werner’s body when even Lord Yeonggang, the Thousand Demons, gave up on it? I wanted to avoid talking about his physical condition, so I held my head where Melissa had hit me and exaggerated my pain.

“Oh, sister… If my head’s durability decreases and some bad guys break it, what will you do?”

Although my question was just a joke, Melchior and Melissa seemed to take it seriously.

“Then we’ll kill all those bastards who dare to touch our little brother! No, before they kill our little brother, we’ll crush the heads of those who even think of it. Those bastards, how dare they…”

“Watch your mouth.”

The only one who can beat a barbarian warrior is his wife. Melissa smiled slyly and gave her answer:

“If there are bastards who do such terrible things to our little brother, we’ll make them beg for death.”

“Is that so? You’re right, hahaha!!!”

And the two of them started laughing heartily. These people are crazy, but Glacies is a normal person compared to this crazy family. I thought they were idiots, but I also wanted to become a part of this family. I never had a family before the possession. Is it greedy to want something I’ve never had before?

“The ceremony will start soon. Little brother, if you run away this time, I’ll really kill you?”

“Where did the person who wanted to kill for me go, the one who said she’d make them beg for death?”

“It’s okay for you to talk to your brother and sister like that.”

Damn, this vampire hag is so stingy.

“Tsk… That’s why you’re so short, you old hag.”

I muttered quietly, but Melissa’s ears seemed to be very sharp.

Today’s trivia is that when someone kicks you in the ribs, it really hurts. My ribs still hurt.

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The northern engagement ceremony was a bit unusual. It wasn’t like the bride would put the groom in a rear naked choke or anything, but the emcee introduced the groom’s and bride’s families briefly, and then the couple faced each other and touched their foreheads together. After that, they exchanged flowers, cut a loaf of bread, and shared it, and the ceremony was over.

The emcee was a man who had been an announcer in the arena for 30 years. I was a little nervous, but I decided to trust him. The emcee held a magic tool that looked like a microphone. I remembered that in the game, it was made by drying the vocal organ of a Gigantic Bat.

“Hello, everyone!!! I’m Forcewagon, your emcee for today’s ceremony!!!!”

His name sounded familiar, but it seemed more like an arena than an engagement ceremony. However, no one seemed to question it. I thought Melissa would use blood magic to attack him for ruining her daughter’s engagement ceremony, but she was laughing.

Hmm… It seems like a cultural thing in the north. I guess in the north, it’s common for the emcee to shout during the engagement ceremony. Culture should be respected, as long as it’s not something like cannibalism or defecating on the street. Of course, if someone goes to another country and demands respect for their culture, they should be given a Confucian punch.

“Everyone here knows about the blessed couple getting engaged today!!!!!”

I wondered if his throat would be okay. I wanted to break his skull with a Confucian punch, but I was afraid of the consequences. Running away from the first engagement ceremony and breaking the emcee’s skull with a Confucian punch at the second ceremony? Buddha would shake his head and use his Buddhist Palm Strike, Jesus would use his Nazarene Sword Technique 1 – Satan Slash, and Confucius would use his True – Confucian Punch.

I decided to stay quiet, fearing the combined attack of the three saints.

The emcee then introduced me with all kinds of flowery words.

“And the blessed man is!!! The great grand magician that everyone knows!!! One of the great heroes!!! The magician who disappeared like the wind and returned like the wind!!! Werner Alton!!!!”

No matter how I listened, it sounded like an introduction for a player entering the arena. I really wanted to throw a Confucian punch. But everyone, including Melchior and Melissa, was clapping, so I guess this is the northern culture. Damn, the northerners’ culture is so barbaric. Do they really eat human flesh?

I sighed and managed my expression as I entered the hall. Seeing some of the women at the engagement ceremony blushing, I realized that Werner’s face was indeed charming. I also noticed some men blushing, and they were definitely getting a Confucian punch later. I wouldn’t respect a culture where men liked me. There will never be BL in my life, and if I throw a Confucian punch at them, the three saints will praise me.

The emcee then introduced Glacies with the microphone.

“And the second protagonist of today!!! Our current lord of the north!!! The greatest warrior with the blood of two great heroes!!! The grand duke of the north!!! Glacies Winterheart!!!!”

No matter how I listened, it sounded like an introduction for players entering the arena. I thought about throwing a Confucian punch at Glacies or using lightning magic to strike first, but fortunately, we were having an engagement ceremony, not an arena match. We touched our foreheads together, and during that moment, I saw a face filled with happiness. She really did love Werner.

Now, we had to cut and share the bread, and as I was about to cut the loaf…

A loud bang shattered the door of the wedding hall. Was it a terrorist attack? Or the Rocket Gang?

It wasn’t the Rocket Gang. The intruders were two people who had been wearing robes to keep out the cold.

They took off their robes, and I could finally see their faces. Damn, the Rocket Gang would have been better.

Camellia drew her sword and said:

“Melissa, Melchior, I know you’re upset, but this is too much.”

And my disciple, Iris, waved at me happily.

“Master! I know you’ve been through a lot! I’ll save you now!”

It seemed like the difficult situation was just beginning. I turned my head to the side and looked at Glacies’s expression.

Her previous smile was gone, and she had a cold and murderous look on her face. And Werner’s exceptional hearing allowed him to hear Glacies’s quiet muttering.

“That slut…”