I Planned a Su*cide Mission and Got Kicked Out of the Party

---

Margaret loved this man. She couldn’t clearly remember when it had begun, but even she, who was proud, couldn’t turn a blind eye to the truth her heart pointed out.

He was, to her, a weak and lovely man, filled with affection she had never felt before in her life.

Even when he stormed into a lord’s castle, covered in blood, demanding a horse, and even when he borrowed a horse, waving a flag like a madman and running wild, it was ultimately the horse that got tired and collapsed before Margaret did. All she wished for was that it wouldn’t be too late for her, that he could be safe, she prayed for just that.

Why had she fallen in love with such a man? She, who had never truly cared for anything other than the blades of grass growing on the land in the thick forest and the citizens who walked on them, why had she fallen for a human who did not belong in this world?

One thing she could be certain of was that her first impression of him was ordinary, if not lower. In the gathering of heroes formed by Walter Hellhound’s design, Jeongjae Park, still too fresh to shed his rookie skin, had bluntly addressed Margaret in informal speech.

He had probably mistaken her for quite a young hero upon seeing her appearance. After learning about Margaret’s social status through Walter, Jeongjae hastily added the title ‘Your Highness’ to apologize for his rudeness, but Margaret simply allowed him to call her casually. She thought he was certainly capable but a bit naïve.

One day, while listening to his story about the forest, he said this.

“The forest, when you think of it, has no weeds, so it seems really nice.”

When she asked what on earth he meant by that, Jeongjae blushed as if worried he had misspoken and replied.

“What I mean is… I don’t mean anything weird. Usually, when a regular human cultivates land, we only select a few types that we deem useful. Everything else is treated as weeds. Since there’s only the same kinds, if there’s something different in between, it can’t help but stand out. But the forest… it doesn’t seem to have such a situation. There are various kinds of plants growing together, so there aren’t really any weeds…”

Margaret looked at him again after hearing that. A thought sprouted in her mind: ‘Are there such individuals even among magicians?’ The magicians she knew were the kind who took their work to the extreme and weren’t satisfied unless everything fit into calculations.

Was there really a magician who could so easily appreciate the beauty of natural harmony? It was clear his attitude was neither pretentious nor showy. Margaret found herself intrigued by this Grand Mage.

One day, there was a moment when they had to burn the entire fields behind the enemy to trap and annihilate their legion. Margaret agreed that it was the best strategy but still furrowed her brow and clicked her tongue with reluctance.

After successfully concluding the battle, Jeongjae came to find her. She thought he might be coming to excuse himself for offending her regarding her tactical decisions.

Saying, “I had no choice,” or “There was no other way,” she expected him to come up with these usual excuses.

But Jeongjae said something that perhaps there could have been another method. He expressed his resentment and regret for having chosen such a destructive route, which should always be avoided.

Margaret, who was taken aback, stopped him. There was no need to worry about her feelings; when it came to swift decisions on the front line, one couldn’t afford to dwell on the details. Instead, she comforted him.

Jeongjae nodded, saying this.

“I know. I’m already doing that. But Margaret, I still think it’s right to question whether there could have been a better way rather than deeming it unavoidable. It’s my weakness, but I think it might be better to correct it… still, I can never shake off such doubts.”

What sort of person is he? He wasn’t a perfect gentleman. He wasn’t an invincible powerhouse. Sometimes, when pressed with urgent situations, he would curse wildly and lose his temper, and in the midst of unbearable situations, there were times he would secretly shed tears. After successfully completing a recent critical retreat operation, Margaret felt her heart ache when she saw him curled up in the wreckage, crying and hiding his face.

Yet, he always reflected on himself, again and again. Always seeking for a better answer, a better future, a better fate.

Even Walter Hellhound often found himself gripped by fear of his future, cursing his fate, yet this man had never cursed a fate that was still undecided but could not endure his reality.

Margaret believed there were fundamentally two types of people in the world. The first were those ready to follow others but not at all prepared to lead. They made up the majority of the world and, in the end, kept the world turning, which was why Margaret held a deep affection for them.

The second was the ambitious types who believed themselves to be at the center of the world. They always etched their names deeply into history and were treated as the most important people, yet for some reason, Margaret felt little affection for them. It seemed the more a person stepped forward, the more their imperfections were revealed.

Jeongjae was fundamentally a following type of person. After crossing over to this world, he had never fought with anything in mind other than Walter’s will, not even for a moment. Walter’s orders, advice, directions, and thoughts bound him. It was the influence that anyone by the side of the warrior of wisdom could not help but succumb to.

However, Margaret knew one clear evidence that Jeongjae had not been devoured by Walter Hellhound. He judged his own actions as his own. He believed it, considered it, bore any praise or criticism by himself. He did not make excuses. Even while obeying orders, he was not the kind of person who would say, “I merely followed orders.”

Margaret observed him keenly. The more she watched, the more she saw an unhatched eagle trapped in an egg, an ordinary person with the qualities of a lord.

Was that why she was so captivated by him? Had she seen the qualities beating within his heart? Was she convinced he was a hero with a mindset greater than appearances?

Even if that were so, it was just a catalyst. Everything was like that. All processes, all reasons ultimately served as a foundation leading to an inexplicable love and affection.

Margaret lifted Jeongjae’s arm, whom she had unjustly fallen for, with all her strength. After using the ‘Vanpleet’ magic to devastate the coastline, Jeongjae, who had been completely knocked down, could only lift his upper body at the sight of her and could not yet stand on his two feet.

Seeing Margaret supporting Jeongjae’s right arm, Jenis walked over, perhaps feeling a hint of jealousy, and supported his left arm. Margaret and Jenis exchanged uncomfortable glances for a moment but soon reached a consensus that this was not a situation to engage in petty rivalry and turned their attentions toward the sea.

Jeongjae, having no idea about the rapid exchange of glances between the two, finally recovered his breath and expressed his gratitude.

“Thank you, Margaret, and Jenis. That seems to be the enemy’s last landing army. If we can take care of them, the Kraken will surely acknowledge that it has no means left to attack us and will retreat completely.”

“Get your strength back. Even if it’s just me, I can’t take on an orc division alone. I need the support of a competent wizard,” Margaret remarked, pulling out a dagger from her waist and embedding it into her boot. Watching her actions with interest, Jenis asked.

“Do you use a blade by sticking it in your foot?”

“I find it comfortable to use.” The more weapons there are, the better the effect, after all.

“You’ll see soon, Jenis. The sight of a Fairy Lord wielding two swords at once is nothing short of marvelous.”

Jeongjae grinned broadly, as if feeling much better. To an observer entirely ignorant of the situation, he might have appeared to be a very happy man sandwiched between two fairly attractive women.

“Anyway, my mana consumption is serious right now. Supporting you with my current state will be difficult… I need to somehow get that cannon ready to fire at least once…”

At that moment, the cannon that Jenis had barely managed to keep intact exploded with a bang, completely falling apart. It seemed the steel used to make the cannon had significantly weakened due to repetitive overheating and cooling.

Jeongjae sighed and finished speaking.

“I can no longer use the cannon. It’s really down to magic now.”

“Then share some of your mana with me,” Margaret said, tightly gripping Jeongjae’s hand and channeling a portion of her mana into his body. Jeongjae squeezed his eyes shut and frowned. He felt an abrupt surge of energy along with the pain of someone else’s mana flowing into him.

It wasn’t impossible to transfer mana to another, but the transmission efficiency was quite poor. It was akin to connecting a mobile phone charger and losing about 70% of the power during charging; this was the amount of mana lost during transmission, and it came with pain as well.

However, deciding to fight in hand-to-hand combat, combined with the fact that there weren’t many kinds of magic she could use, made it a rational decision for Margaret to endure that inefficiency to get Jeongjae on his feet to support her.

“Are you okay?”

Margaret stopped the mana transfer and asked Jeongjae. He stood firmly on both legs, shaking off the support and nodded.

“I can use support magic. I need more recovery time to use anything beyond that.”

“And the mana rejection response?”

Jenis inquired. It was typical for anyone to experience some level of rejection when receiving another’s mana. Jeongjae gently grabbed his abdomen and nodded.

“It’s not that severe. Just a bit of nausea?”

“You could always vomit on the beach you smashed up. That should be fine to endure.”

“That’s true. The beach is already stacked with orc corpses, so adding some vomit isn’t going to make it any dirtier.”

The situation on the beach was hell itself, and Jeongjae’s observations were not exaggerated. Just a few hours earlier, it had only been a threatening barricade, but now it was entirely covered in black dust, looking almost like a rocky area blanketed with volcanic ash. Among the piles of ash, the sight of corpses that clung to life, having not been completely burned, was also disturbing.

The orc legion seemed prepared to unload their ships, but we could tell they were hesitant to disembark, perhaps due to the shock from the earlier bombardment or the fear invoked by the beach’s state.

The large orc, presumably the commander or chief, pointed towards Jeongjae’s group, likely to say that they could no longer attack with the cannon smashed, but since they spoke in orcish, the meaning didn’t get across.

Finally, after more than 15 minutes of merely preparing to disembark, the orcs only began to step off their ships after their commander had severed the head of one who was hesitating right in front of him.

“Discipline is in shambles,” Margaret evaluated, while Jeongjae shrugged.

“You should have seen the bombardment. Considering they suffered such an attack, it’s no wonder they’re acting like this.”

“Of course I’ve seen it. I could see it clearly even from hundreds of meters away. I thought I might be the end if I went there, thinking the fortress was under attack by dragon legion.”

The orcs began to gather en masse on the shore. Following suit, Margaret stepped forward, drawing a bow from her back and nocking an arrow.

“Let’s take out the leader first.”

Margaret declared, releasing the arrow that sliced through the air, striking the orc commander screeching madly in the throat.

The commander of the orc legion, hit by the arrow from the Fairy Lord, fell dead without even letting out a scream. Naturally, the orcs fell into even more intense panic than before.

“The basic tactic is not to flaunt that you’re the commander when under fire, foolish creature.”

Margaret clicked her tongue as she readied another arrow. Just as she decided that she could potentially throw the orcs into panic and overwhelm them easily, the Kraken, unable to hold back any longer, came crashing out splashing water everywhere.

With a crash, the Kraken began to smash down all the ships in the sea. As soldiers, unwilling to disembark, watched, the Kraken coaxed their sense of fear by slowly destroying those bare vessels behind them one by one.

In the end, they had no choice but to disembark. The Kraken’s goal was to create a situation where not advancing after disembarking would force them to starve on the beach.

It could be likened to the motivation behind Spanish conqueror Hernán Cortés burning his ships before the Aztecs, refusing to turn back.

Ultimately, the orcs were driven off the ships, clustering on the beach. Jeongjae, slowly emerging from behind Margaret, licked his lips in satisfaction.

“If only we could bombard once more. They have no means to return now.”

“That means they will attack desperately. How about the kid?”

“If it’s Jenis, I’ve let her rest in the back. She can’t draw on mana like me and is already exhausted.”

“Good. That works. Once we clear those brats, this should all be over.”

“That’s the gist of it.”

The elf and wizard nodded at one another.

At that very moment, more than 3,000 orcs charged frantically to conquer the territory. Margaret, in response, began running forward while shooting arrows.

“I’ll lead the charge! Support me!”

Margaret shouted. Jeongjae nodded, wrapping his hands around magic circles.

About four hours into the battle, the last clash of this conflict was beginning to unfold.