NOVEL NEXT chapter 19
19 – Beneath
Looking at me, who was panting heavily, Professor Cordelia spoke.
“What did you do to be so exhausted?”
“I was dispelling a 6-circle magic. Isn’t it tiring if it’s not?”
Upon hearing this, she shrugged her shoulders once and said, “Oh, come on. Don’t exaggerate. It’s nothing special.”
As Cordelia Professor spoke, tapping my back, I retorted.
“What’s nothing special…”
Cordelia Professor looked at me with a smile, then opened her mouth.
“Has your complicated mind eased a bit now?”
“Excuse me?”
I looked at Professor Cordelia. She shrugged her shoulders without any expression and said,
“Why? Weren’t you taking a walk because something was bothering you?”
“No… I mean, well, yeah, kind of.”
I stammered, not knowing what to say.
Cordelia Professor seemed to find my hesitation amusing, chuckled softly, and said,
“But still, I’m your direct mentor. I know everything. Whether it’s about using some strength or clearing the complicated thoughts in your head, is it okay now?”
“…You really know a lot about me.”
I said that and smiled.
“Well, still… honestly, it’s not completely resolved. It’s a dilemma that seems like it can’t be resolved in the first place.”
“Really? If it’s such a dilemma, telling me won’t make much of a difference. Well, it can’t be helped.”
It was true. Although Professor Cordelia was a trustworthy person, the very topic that made me ponder like this was not something I could discuss with someone else in the first place.
I nodded slightly to Cordelia Professor and said,
“I appreciate it, but I think I need to think about my concerns on my own. Still… thank you for caring.”
“No, it’s okay. Even though you’re my mentor, should I just stand by quietly when I see my disciple struggling? Well… it’s regrettable that I couldn’t be of help.”
I felt Professor Cordelia’s hand gently patting my shoulder.
Her hand was strangely warm.
“If you need help, just say the word. I’ll listen to your story while buying you a drink or something.”
Feeling the warmth of that touch, I could finally relax and smile.
“Haha… thank you. Really.”
Professor Cordelia looked at me with red eyes, and I looked back at her.
…If it’s this person, maybe it’s okay to share some of the story.
After a moment of contemplation, I spoke up.
“…Just, what should I say?”
Professor Cordelia looked at me, listening to my words.
“In the past, there was someone who did me a favor.”
I said that and turned my gaze to the sky.
“Thanks to that person, things were resolved luckily, but now, looking back, it seems like that person ended up in not-so-great circumstances.”
Why am I saying all this? It’s not like I’m drunk. Maybe I’m just intoxicated by the night sky, the dawn breeze, and the warmth I felt in her hand.
“But, that person asked me. What should they do? …Even in that situation, they gave me the choice.”
Professor Cordelia silently listened to my words. Looking at the sky, I continued.
“But, I couldn’t bring myself to answer that question. I couldn’t even say whether they should make a choice for themselves or make a choice for their own sake.”
Having said that, I laughed.
“No, honestly, I can’t even be sure of what I truly want. So, what to do… well, I don’t know. I really don’t know.”
Hearing my dilemma, Professor Cordelia opened her mouth.
“…If you don’t know, what about leaving it as it is?”
I looked at her. Professor Cordelia made a thoughtful sound and continued.
“You said that you’re troubled because you don’t even know what you want. But is that really a big problem? After all, it’s not uncommon for a person not to know their own heart.”
I felt like I had been hit on the head with a hammer. She continued.
“If you’re troubled because you don’t know what you want, is that such a big issue? In the first place, it’s not so rare for a person not to know their own heart.”
“At times, one may not even know what they want for lunch. Such a thing ultimately reflects a lack of understanding of oneself. Do you really not know what you want to do? Isn’t it crucial to decide now?”
“No, it’s just that…”
“If you don’t understand yourself right now, just admit it. Say you don’t know.”
Listening to Professor Cordelia’s words, I finally gained insight.
“…Thank you. Now, I feel a bit more at ease.”
Upon hearing this, Professor Cordelia cheerfully patted my back and spoke.
“See, as a true mentor, this time I was of some help, right?”
I smiled and replied, “Yes, tremendously.”
…
After that, I began writing a letter.
“To His Excellency,
The political situation outside seems to be even more chaotic than I had anticipated.
However, honestly speaking, I have… no words to offer. No, I cannot find the words.
The alliance between Arianne and our family’s adversary, Irikali, is indeed a regrettable and sorrowful event for me as well.
But even so, I do not wish for Arianne’s downfall.
Regarding Arianne, my emotions are still unsettled, and I cannot make a proper judgment at this time.
Yes, I cannot decide what to say or do right now.
I remember the assistance you provided me.
If you have decided to abandon politics in disillusionment and forsake Arianne, it is an unavoidable matter.
However, I cannot express approval for that. It is a problem that existed before I incurred the debt.”
Tap. After completing the letter, I placed the pen on the desk.
Is this the right thing to do?
Because of this, I may not have walked the path I should have.
But… I shook my head. At least, this letter contained exactly what I had in mind.
The astonishingly foolish and surprisingly timid letter I had sent would only reveal its consequences in time.
…
Ariel bit her lip. The unexpected visitor, just by being present, exuded a tension-inducing aura.
“Hello.”
Ariel bowed before him, a gesture that seemed to add to the already stern countenance of the old man.
“Hello, I guess. These days, I find the political nonsense quite unbearable.”
Upon hearing those words, Ariel swallowed dry saliva.
“…What specifically is bothering you?”
Saints responded with a disdainful sound to Ariel’s question.
“What’s bothering me? Everything. Watching those political idiots frolic and rampage, thinking it’s pleasant, is beyond me.”
“…”
Saints spoke, opening up about the current situation.
“Being on good terms with Ircalli might be a natural course of action from your perspective.”
Ariel responded upon hearing those words.
“Yes. To safeguard the family, it was unavoidable. The momentum of the Imperial Faction is steadily growing, and I needed allies who wouldn’t condemn me for not conforming.”
Hence, Ariel allied with the neutrally positioned Ircalli.
“Yes, that’s one way to put it.”
Ariel bowed deeply.
Later, Saints broke the silence.
“However, I cannot accept your methods.”
Ariel bit her lip upon hearing those words. Saints looked at Ariel and continued speaking.
“Do you know why I helped you?”
Ariel lowered her head and said, “I’m sorry. I still don’t understand why you chose to assist me.”
Upon hearing her words, Saints sighed and spoke.
“Did that guy say anything to you?”
That guy? Who could that possibly be referring to? Ariel hesitated before opening her mouth.
“Whom are you referring to?”
Saint answered Ariel’s question.
“Your former fiancé. When he first came to me asking for help to assist you, he seemed so enthusiastic. But ironically, the one who received help seemed unaware of it.”
With a chuckle, Saint looked at Ariel.
“Well, I suppose that’s why he decided to break off the engagement so easily. People’s hearts are unpredictable, aren’t they?”
“If it’s my former fiancé…”
She asked with a trembling voice.
No, there was no doubt that something was wrong. It couldn’t be true.
If her former fiancé, Edun, had indeed helped her… she would have no way to repay him.
Saint, indifferent to Ariel’s thoughts, continued.
“Who else could it be? Edun. Edun Kainos.”
Upon hearing those words, Ariel felt a sense of overwhelming confusion.
“That… what does that mean?”
“It’s a ridiculous situation. Asking me for help with his fiancée, yet he couldn’t even protect himself properly.”
Upon hearing this, Ariel fell silent.
The hidden truth overwhelmed her, something she had never known.
And Saint silently observed Ariel in that state.