I am Peter Parker

200 gems = bonus chapter

20 comments per chapter = bonus chapter 

10 reviews = bonus chapter 

3 patreon subscriptions = 10 bonus chapters

Fully completed story at:

patreon.com/FanFictionPremium

***

Eroil, the Distributor of Worlds, sat contentedly in his chair quietly watching the goings on in one of the worlds. He had to intervene a couple of times to make things happen properly and lead to proper encounters.

A mistake in analysing the trajectory of a hit. And bam, an encounter with the Iron Lady.

A whiff of wind. And bam, popping up on the school fence to squeal in front of her friends, Flash Thompson in the hero's arms.

A friend's number falling out of the book supervisor's notebook. The report, which Brock helped write and which she also bragged about to her friend, was aired at the very moment Joanna was in the ward watching TV.

Yes, Eroil had done his best to recruit girls for the harem and get the story on the road to Peter's happiness started....

Except, would it be enough...?

**Gwen, after a kiss**

Yay!

Fuck!

- FUCK, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT JUST NOW? !!!!!!!!!!!!

Peter kissed me?! He kissed me! Why?! Why?! Why?!

- Haa... - I rolled down the wall from the fatigue of what happened and the long run. - What's the matter, really...?

He knows I'm a girl, right? So I thought that he would either, at worst, blackmail me with it or, which I expected, use it to tease me. But what if... Just what if.

He likes me? Could he like me?

Don't most people wish their lovers were their best friends at the same time? I'd like that.

- Wait! Did I just think I wanted to date Peter? - The intense pounding in my chest made the words come out of my mouth. - No, no, I was just thinking about a hypothetical situation, yes, I did. Ugh, because of that jerk, I even started talking from the wrong sort....

Looking around, I was able to exhale - no one was around. And to return to a new round of worries; after all, the situation is not hypothetical.....

Why did Peter like to cuddle with me so much? Why did he try so hard to find out my secret, and yet he wanted me to tell him? Why was the kiss so passionate?

If I imagine, just imagine, that Peter is really in love with me, doesn't it all add up?

Could it be that his invitation to his house today was unusual? Could it be that he was about to confess?

- Hey, Jesse, look at that guy over there.

And then he would--

- Oh, yuck! Why is he drooling all of a sudden? Come on, let's go. He's a little creepy.

At my manhood's innocent thoughts, I blushed and shook my head from side to side.

Except... What am I supposed to do now? His feelings aren't my feelings, he might be in love with me, but I... I like him, of course. As a friend, I can even say that I love him....

- А?! I-I love Peter? God, why is it that just thinking about it makes my heart race?!

So much has happened today that I just can't get my head round it. I feel like I don't understand anything! The only thing I can say for sure is...

I liked the kiss.

**Sue, after the same kiss, just a little later **

- RESPECTAAAAAAAAAAH!

Under the blue blanket, Joanna buried her face into the pillows, letting out an ear-splitting cry.

- Well, well, well... - Taking out my contact lenses, putting on my glasses and fixing my fringes, I sat down at my desk and took the documents Ria had asked me to look at out of my bag.

- WOWAAAAA!..! If you don't want to calm me down, you'd better get out of here! Uwaaaaaah!...

- My room... - I cut my sister's outrage short. - Come on, like he's the first guy who couldn't handle your temper? In fact, he's not even the first this year, what was his name, Chester?

- Don't mention that bastard, he dumped me in a restaurant on our third date! And then claimed on social media that I was stalking him, even though I just wanted to talk things out! Can you imagine that?!

- Yeah. This is the 30th time I've heard this, and I still can't imagine... - when will that idiot stop falling in love with every pretty boy? God, this one wasn't even close to being that good-looking!

- Yaaaaaah! But why doesn't anyone love me?

And every time, tantrums, depression, romantic songs at full volume, a little peace, and then the next handsome guy, or in the case of this one, not so handsome, and all over again.... When will it finally dawn on her that it's easy for people like us to find a guy for the night, but almost impossible to find one worthy of marriage...?

And the blokes, damn them, they're good, they see her on the screen, imagine her in their wet fantasies, and then bam! No-one would expect that, and she has her faults! She's a human being too!

- Uwaaaah!...

On the one hand, I'm glad at least no one tried to take advantage of her feelings, apparently life is more precious than profiting, or screwing the heroine. On the other hand, maybe this way she'd put away her hopeless fantasies already at last....

- Uwah!

What a load of rubbish I've been thinking.

- Okay, you're gonna be fine. - I sat down on the bed and stroked the blanket mound. - You'll find someone much better.

- No! It came from under the duvet. - I want to go out with Peter! He's my soul mate.

What a hard-ass. She doesn't know anything about him, but she's already invented a perfect prince for herself, acting just like the bastards who broke her heart.... Bloody idiot!

- Erm, Sue, one more thing.

- What?

- You're kind of stroking my arse...

....

*♪ Slap ♪

- Ow! For what?! - The turtle finally crawled out of her shell. Her eyes are red, her nose is red, and her lips are pouty - what a child she is after all. But I love her like that, and I want her to stay that way forever, no matter how much trouble it takes....

- I'm gonna go disinfect it or cut it off, and don't fall in love with some passerby in the window, okay?

- Fuck you! - my favourite sister threw a pillow at me. Damn Parker, how dare he hurt such a pretty girl?!

** Terry Stark. The next day.

- Julia, tell me something I can't see. - I've been checking my settings for six hours looking for what caused yesterday's problem, but I can't find anything.

- You have an oil stain on your arse.

- That's not what I'm talking about! Shit. What's wrong with you? Since yesterday, you've been acting looser than usual.

- As I said earlier, there are no system problems. It's most likely pilot error... - what did she just say?! - Or the original trajectory was too chaotic to calculate accurately.

- Haaah. Okay, let's just say - I'm too tired. I'll run some tests tomorrow, just to be on the safe side.

- As for my strange behaviour. I'm not the only one behaving in an unusual manner, Miss Stark, you're much more tense than usual.

- Of course I am. I almost died yesterday.

- Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

- Haa. Okay, yeah, that little bugger pissed me off. Who does he think he is to talk to me like that? Does he think he can interest me with his behaviour? Show me he's different? Yes, yes, the clever boy knows that patterns won't work on me.

- Miss Stark, have you considered-- You didn't consider the slightest possibility that he's not interested in you? - How nonsensical is that? - Maybe he has a girlfriend or--

- Does he? - I told Julia to check the evidence. Correspondence, selfies, just pictures of him together, gifts or money transfers - if he actually has someone, it wouldn't be hard to prove. Though I'm sure having one, two, three, five girls wouldn't stop him from trying to get me.

- There are pictures of him with one girl. She's pretending to be a guy, and I don't know if Parker knows it or not. Otherwise, there's no suspicious connection.

- What, he's not even in touch with his exes? - cold-hearted catcher, what a surprise.

- Erm... No. No information to indicate that Peter Parker has ever been in a relationship.

Hmm. Now that's interesting, and very suspicious.

We casually meet, he helps me out, shows a lack of interest in both his status and my money, then I find no evidence of his viciousness....

It's a bloody formulaic dorama!

- Miss Stark, have you also thought about the similarity of your situation to the standard plot of the Korean serials you're forced to-. that we so enjoy watching together?

- I'm thinking more about how it all came together. It's like a puzzle. Except who did the puzzle for me?

I could kidnap and interrogate the kid, but I suppose that would be useless, plus he'd easily turn the situation against me. I need to figure out how to get close to him and figure it out....

*(ringing)

I was interrupted from trying to come up with a plan by the phone ringing. It was Ripley. I wonder what she wants from me all of a sudden?

- Yes, little girl?

- Miss Stark, have you made your choice yet?

- A choice?

- Ughhhh. Miss Stark. - Ripley said pitifully. - A candidate for the show? - Just as I was about to ask which show, Ripley interrupted me. - The others have already chosen their candidates, you're the only ones left, and today's the last day, tomorrow's the shoot. And don't ask me, if I choose for you, then for the next season I'll have to choose for all the Avengers at once, and I wouldn't want that. So, have you decided on the man after your heart yet?

Apparently, Ripley is talking about the show "Avengers Bridegroom," an astronomically popular TV project with hundreds of millions of viewers. The gist of the show is that several men compete for our hearts with the goal of getting them all.... It's a silly concept, but a huge number of young ladies from all over the world enjoy watching guys and men who wouldn't even look in their direction end up brutally losing and walking away with nothing. Yes, in four seasons, to the surprise of probably no one with common sense, there was no man the girls and I liked.

And neither of us has any interest in a relationship of that nature, so from the selection to the filming, we only make a feeble show of interest, and that's on the best of days. An image, however, is an image. Even if it is earned in such a futile way....

Wait a minute.

- Yeah, you know, I think I found a guy I really want to see on this show.

- Wow! That's the first time I've ever heard you say that. Just give me his file number or his name.

- Peter Parker.

You got yourself a guy!

- Um. I don't want to break the dramatic pause, but it's the two hundred and thirtieth most popular name, and the forty-seventh most popular surname; so we have several men with such a prosaic name. So... You'd better tell me the number.

**Peter. The real one.

- It's morning. - a sleepy voice says hello to me, Silver Scammer.

- Good morning, you want breakfast?

- Oh! You're in a good mood today. Why would I be in a good mood?

I've had a lot on my plate lately. I've had so many problems popping up all over the place, it's overwhelming. But in times like this, you have to be optimistic and look on the bright side...

- Hey, over, you gonna answer my question?

- I was just thinking that when you have a lot of problems, the bright side is that the only way is to solve them. So things can only get better.

- Well... Or there could be more problems, like what?

- ...

- You seem a little down all of a sudden. So what's for breakfast?

- Shut up, you silver bum! You're gonna eat the boxes you usually sleep on!

- I'm a sable, Silver Sable! And that joke stopped being funny yesterday!