NOVEL NEXT 82. Graveyard
Julia had been kneeling in front of the grave in silence for a couple of minutes now. Seeing it was making her feel like she had a massive hole in her heart. No, I shouldn’t feel like this. I am Julia, and Julia has no kids. This is Alony’s daughter, who died millennia ago. As soon as this train of thoughts came into her brain, a dull thud was heard. And a few more followed soon.
God, I am horrible. Why would I even… A few tears ran down her cheeks, but Julia paid them no mind. Just like the blood that came out of the fresh injury forming on her head.
“And now I even dirtied your resting place... Just why can’t I make anything right?”
Julia took out a handkerchief and started to wipe her blood off the gravestone. Not that it went nearly as easily as she would have liked. Come on, why does my blood have to be so hard to clean? And here, of all places? Julia’s face morphed with desperation as her hand started to wipe with more force and increased speed.
“Had I not gotten those memories back, then I wouldn’t be feeling like this. Like a failure.”
Julia sighed in resignation. The stain of her blood was stubbornly resisting, refusing to let go.
“…You’re not.”
Who? Julia looked around as a barely audible voice was carried to her ears by the wind. The voice of a young girl was accompanied by the feeling of a small hand on her shoulder. The feeling was cold and yet warm.
It was the sort of familiar warmth that brought a smile to one’s face. but in this case, it brought only more tears. Julia remembers this feeling from the past. Which is why she feels the way she did.
“Please don’t rush after me; I don’t want you to die so soon.”
Along with the cherry-like voice, the wound on Julia’s head began to heal quickly. Once it healed, Julia was enveloped by a sensation resembling a loving hug. And she wanted to return it.
“…Mia.”
Julia closes her eyes. The face of her daughter crossed her mind. It felt like she was near, like Julia could embrace her, like in her memories. Julia wiped the tears running from her eyes, brushing her finger along the withered golden letters.
“I hope your second life is a happier one.”
Julia murmured. As she herself experienced and as she taught her daughter, after death comes reincarnation. So, her only hope was that Mia would be reborn into a good family that would love her and that she would have a lot of great friends. And just all that Julia was not able to give her.
“I am still here; can’t you see me?”
A cold wind brushed past Julia as she merely chuckled.
"It looks like I am going insane. To clearly hear her voice... or perhaps did you come to haunt your foolish mother?”
Smiling sadly, she directed her gaze at the grave. She was sure she could see the figure of a little vampire standing near her. though when she would look there, then there was nothing.
“No, I am really here.”
And Julia laughed to the heavens.
“Oh, goddess. For what sin have you decided to torment me? And for what did you sentence my child to be my tormentor in your place? Or perhaps you are merely using her voice to do so?”
Julia’s face looked like she was mentally broken. Maybe it was a mistake to come here. Julia thought. Had she known that a certain fox deity would torment her, she would not have bothered. Though it had been a long time since she visited her daughter’s grave.
“Can’t you even recognize your own daughter? Mom, wake up!”
A concerned girl appeared in her field of vision. Through her clouded eyes, Julia could still tell the girl’s identity.
“You really did come to haunt me?”
In front of Julia was a transparent figure of a girl she never thought to see again. Her daughter from her previous life; Mia. And she was pouting.
“You finally pay attention to me, and that is the first thing you say?”
Mia crossed her arms while floating above the ground. Which forced Julia to look slightly up.
“What else should I say? It was two thousand years; you should have more than one new life already.”
As glad as she was to see her again, the thought that she stayed in this world just to haunt Julia was saddening for her. While she would never judge her past self as an excellent mother, she still doesn’t think that Mia would have many reasons to want to torment her.
“It’s your fault for not having kids.”
“He?”
Mia murmured to herself just loudly enough for Julia to catch it. resulting in her perplexed reaction.
“When that fox lady told me I could choose how I wanted to be reborn, it made me happy. And when she accepted my request to be reborn again as your daughter, I was so excited.”
Mia looked at Julia with a stained smile, making Julia think that she had gone through a lot of hardship. Mia continued without paying her mother any mind.
“So, I waited months, years, decades, centuries, millennia... looking at how you waged war in my name.”
Julia scratched her head awkwardly. She knew what she was doing for those few hundred years. Using her daughter’s death as an excuse to do whatever she wanted. Having it spelled out by her daughter’s spirit was making her feel more awful.
“Sorry but… You do know I would never have more children than you, right?”
“Did you ever think you would have me in the first place?”
That’s fair. Julia thought. The fact she was lesbian in her previous life didn’t stop her from having her own child. But that was under different circumstances. Circumstances in which Mia would not be involved again.
“I think you should focus on something else...”
Julia choked on her next words. She didn’t want to say them to her, but she had to.
“You know I will never be with a man. I am not going to have another child.”
Julia found herself unable to face her daughter’s spirit, but she was sure she was disappointed.
