How to Live as a Genius Scholar in another World

Chapter 36- The White Mage (5)

#Only READ at DarkstarTranslations

—–CROW—– 

—*Gurgle.*

After about 30 seconds submerged, when the heat of the bathwater began to feel hotter than the flush in my face, I resurfaced.

*Splash…*

Like an assassin emerging from the water, only my eyes were above the surface.  Francesca, cupping her cheeks, looked embarrassed, then steered the conversation back on track.

“But if that’s the case, we should go to the Mage’s Guild soon.”

“…Right. If the situation calls for it, I’ll have to go even if it means revealing my face.  Early treatment is crucial for illnesses.”

Sensing Francesca’s attempt to lighten the mood, I emerged from the water and replied.  She thought for a moment, then said,

“Should I just stay up all night and fix it? Dwarves can go a week without sleep!”

“Let’s not do that…”

Why did she always use “dying” as a benchmark?  Coming from someone who measured their alcohol tolerance by how much they drank before almost dying, it didn’t sound like a joke.

When I shook my head again, Francesca sat down in the bath and splashed the water, tilting her head.  Suddenly, her face brightened as she exclaimed,

“I’ve got it! I’ll cancel today’s request and spend all the extra time fixing your clothes!”

“What?”

Cancel a request? I couldn’t believe Francesca would say such a thing.

“Cancel? You mean skip today’s request?”

“Yes! But I should still let the reception desk and the others know.”

It sounded responsible, but these were the words of someone about to play hooky.

“Oh my.”

I was surprised by Francesca’s change. I had heard that some women, after starting a relationship, completely transformed, their previous diligence becoming a distant memory. Did Francesca have that tendency?

‘Is she going to dye her hair and get a tan next?’

I imagined a blonde, tanned, half-dwarf delinquent Francesca and grimaced.

If that happened, the innkeeper, Beyna, would come after me with a cooking shovel and smash my head like a lightbulb!

“Don’t. Canceling a request will affect your promotion.”

“I don’t care.  I’m not aiming to be a receptionist anymore.  And besides—”

Francesca said with a bright smile,

“Since I’m a senior adventurer compared to you, I’ll get promoted first anyway. What’s the point of me getting the Bronze Plate alone? I’d rather be promoted a little later and work with you, Nord.”

An angel.

A fucking angel was right here.

Blinded by Francesca’s merciful radiance, I closed my eyes. This wasn’t a couples’ bath; it was a holy site for baptism.  Overwhelmed with emotion, I clasped my hands together in prayer.

“…Nord. Are you crying?”

“Sniff.  Crying? Why would I be crying?  In my country, men only cry three times in their lives.  Sniffle.”

These weren’t tears.  It was just my heart’s pre-cum, overflowing with emotion.

Heart pre-cum was generally classified as a physiological phenomenon. It was like how you wouldn’t say you were crying just because you teared up a little while yawning.

“*Sob…*”

I was deeply moved, my heart’s pre-cum flowing freely at Francesca’s immense love.  It was an unconditional love, almost maternal.  My voice choked with emotion.

“Mama…”

“Mama?”

“…”

Dammit, vocal cords, why did you have to make a sound?!

“N-no, Francesca, it’s not like that…”

My unfiltered words instantly stopped my tears!!

Fuck, this was way too much.  No woman would remain unaffected by her boyfriend calling her “mama.”  Jokes like “mama’s milkies” should only be made on the internet!!

‘Mama?  Fucking mama?’

This was something you could freak out about even if you *didn’t* say it out loud!!  Putting yourself in the other person’s shoes made it even clearer!!!

—Daddy.  My dick is hard.  *Slurp, slurp.*

Imagine your girlfriend saying that while sucking your dick!!  Unless you were seriously messed up, it would be impossible to get a boner!!

A man calling his girlfriend “mama’s milkies” was no different!!

“Mama… mama…?”

I tried to come up with an excuse, but Francesca, as if she couldn’t hear me, murmured to herself, then looked up.

“Hmm~?”

A mischievous smile I had never seen before spread across her face, along with uncontainable amusement.

Francesca spread her arms and exclaimed in a bright voice,

“Mama it is!”

“…Huh?”

Francesca sat on the edge of the bath, her posture suggesting complete acceptance.

She was my personal Madonna, radiating the same benevolence as the Virgin Mary!!

“Mama Francesca…!!”

I felt the child within me cry out at the sight.  My heart’s pre-cum, which had stopped flowing, gushed forth again.

Francesca’s maternal love was as soft as her ample bosom.

Ah, this was what sex was all about.

***

Around 10:30 AM, Francesca and I left the bathhouse.

“We look forward to your next visit.”

We quickly fled from the receptionist’s knowing smile.  The fact that a stranger knew we had been engrossed in sex in the middle of the day was incredibly embarrassing.

Emerging under the bright blue sky, we exchanged glances.

“…Want to grab some food?”

“…Sure.”

Francesca nodded at my suggestion.  We had snacked on wine and fruit in the bath, but other than that, we hadn’t eaten all day, and we were starving.

“I know a place that’s cheap and delicious. But the portions are huge, so I always end up taking some home.”

“Let’s go there.  I could probably eat 1.5 servings, including your leftovers.”

“Okay. This way.”

We followed Francesca to a nearby restaurant, ordered some food, and finished our meal.

The food at the Dorkaen Inn was better, but this place was more cost-effective.  It was like comparing a 10,000 won galbi-tang to a 5,000 won makguksu.  Which one you chose depended on your preference.

After finishing my meal, I put down my spoon and said,

“Francesca. I’ve been thinking, maybe I could take your request for you?”

“You, Nord?”

“Yes. I’m off duty today, and if I substitute for you while you’re fixing your clothes, it would be better than canceling completely, right?”

It was like calling in a substitute.  Depending on the job, it wouldn’t matter if I went in her place. They probably weren’t expecting Francesca-level dexterity or lock-picking skills from a newbie adventurer.

Francesca asked, her eyes filled with concern,

“…Today’s request is in the sewers…”

“…It’s fine.”

I felt my PTSD from the giant crickets resurface, but I put on a brave face.  Now I understood why men tried to act tough in front of their girlfriends and ended up causing trouble.

‘Fuck it all!  Trauma be damned! Fear is overcome by facing it head-on!!!’

It was the kind of bullshit a psychiatrist would try to stop me from doing, even if it meant chloroforming me.

But there were no psychiatrists in this world. Freud, you’re just a creepy old man here!!

—*Shiver.*

“I’ll… be… right… back…”

“B-be careful.”

I returned to the inn, exuding bravery like a Death Knight of the Bloody Laws, his frozen banner fluttering in the wind.

I had to grab my equipment from my room, inform the Adventurer’s Guild reception desk about the substitution, and be at the meeting point by noon. I had enough time to spare.

—*Gulp.*

Back at the inn, Dorka was sitting at the counter, reading a newspaper.  Wasn’t he supposed to be working? Ah, there were no customers.

“Well, well, well.  Look who’s back. Our inn’s biggest spender.”

The innkeeper, with his villainous face, grinned and folded his newspaper.

“Why am I a big spender?  Nice rhyme.”

“You skip the free breakfast and stay out all night.  There’s no customer more profitable than you.”

“Well, I can’t help it. I’m an adventurer. I was working yesterday too.”

“*Chuckle.*  You’re funny.  Without your armor and weapons?”

Dorka pointed at me with his newspaper, as if my words were preposterous.

“It wasn’t a dangerous job. So I just went with my body.”

“Is that something you would do? You’re the type to wear full armor even for a delivery job.”

“Hey, we haven’t known each other *that* long. What kind of person do you think I am?”

“The type who overthinks and misses the obvious. The type who worries about monsters hiding behind distant rocks and trips over a pebble at their feet.”

“No shit.”

He was spot on.

Seeing me unable to refute, Dorka chuckled and said,

“So you’re self-aware.  Find a reliable companion.  There’s a saying, ‘A giant needs a dwarf on his shoulder.’”

“Never heard of it.”

“It means someone like you needs someone meticulous and caring.”

Before I could respond, Dorka patted his own shoulder.

“Someone who looks in the same direction as the giant and points out what the giant can’t see. A dwarf who can whisper in the giant’s ear without being crushed underfoot.”

“A giant, huh. I am a big guy in many ways.”

“It’s just a metaphor, so don’t get cocky.”

“Confidence is all I have. Are you telling me to die?”

“Oh, please. No wonder you seem a bit empty-headed sometimes.”

“Emptiness is just space waiting to be filled.  Even the greatest masterpieces start with a blank canvas.”

“With that silver tongue, you won’t starve to death. But if you plan to have a long career as an adventurer, not a circus performer, you need a companion you can trust your back to.”

—*Swipe.*

Dorka’s thick finger traced the large scar on his face.

“Trying to do everything yourself is arrogance. Even I leave the serving and running of the inn to my wife during busy nights. Even if people can’t share the same dream, they can at least sleep with their heads together, right?”

“Holy shit!  I can feel the intelligence seeping through your words! You’re not Dorka, are you? Give me back my friend!”

“*Chuckle.* Give up.  Take this instead.”

*Whoosh!*

Dorka tossed me a thick package. The slightly fragrant smell told me it was smoked jerky.

“You’re the first person I’ve met who pays 3 coppers and skips breakfast like that. My conscience wouldn’t let me just throw it away.  It’s leftover stew meat, so eat it.”

“I can’t eat it now. I’m going to the sewers.  But thank you very much.”

“Hey, a real adventurer can eat three meals a day even next to a rotting corpse.”

“Ooh. Dorka, you’re quite perceptive to call me a fake adventurer. I’ll accept this meat as a token of respect.”

“*Hahaha!*  You crazy bastard.”

Dorka burst out laughing at my strange pose. I chuckled along with him and said,

“Hee hee.  Oh, and about that dwarf on the shoulder thing… I don’t think I need to look for one.”

“What? Why?”

“—I came, I saw, I conquered.”

I raised my pinky finger with a solemn expression. Dorka grinned, his expression filled with amusement.

“You little shit, I knew you’d say that!  Hey! Tell me all about it when you get back!”

“That’ll be 1 copper, sir.”

“Damn it. I shouldn’t have given you the jerky.”

I parted ways with the tsundere Dorka, chuckling.  I went to my room, left the jerky, grabbed my armor and sword, and reported to the guild about the substitution.

“Understood.  Francesca wasn’t the party leader for this request, and it’s better than canceling altogether.”

The receptionist looked displeased but approved the substitution.

“However, please tell Francesca that repeated instances of this will affect her evaluation. The credit for this request will also go to you, Nord.”

“Understood.”

It was probably a measure to prevent people from hiring substitutes like it was a ranked game.  After finishing the paperwork, I headed to the meeting point and started the request.

Everyone was a stranger, but the request went smoothly.

…However, I didn’t want to describe the scenes I witnessed in the sewers that day.

“*Gwaaaaaack!!!*  Fucking giant cricket steaks!!!”

Those damn adventurers had somehow managed to fill the sewers with medium-rare cricket barbecue.  What the hell were they thinking, using flamethrowers in a place filled with toxic gas?  Those assholes.

I wasn’t ever coming back to these sewers again.

The infuriatingly delicious smell made it twice as frustrating.

—–CROW—– 

#Only READ at DarkstarTranslations