How To Be Misunderstood as a Villain in a Zombie Apocalypse

Chapter 21. The Art of Deceiving One Another (17)

* * * * *

Virginia was noticeably gaunt. Her hair was matted, her eyes and cheeks were sunken, and there were needle marks on her arms.

It’s not my fault.

The fact that she was noticeably thin was because she didn’t eat well, and the needle in her arm was because Cassandra was poking her around like a trainee, saying, “Hmm, I can’t find the vein. Was it here?” It was clear that she did it on purpose. She wasn’t poking her around with the needle in a petty way, but it was a means to collect as many cells as possible and analyze her blood.

Virginia, like Cassandra, was clearly ‘a bit improved’. She had a considerable resistance to the Cro Virus, so drastic measures such as ‘let’s trap her in a pheromone chamber and infect her’ or ‘let’s just inject her with John’s Cro Virus’ were rejected.

The remaining question is how to deal with Virginia.

“The way I see it, there are two possibilities. Either soldiers loyal to Virginia come to rescue us. The solution to this problem is simple. We just have to leave early.”

“The other one?”

Camilla asked.

“The other is that the usually ambitious figures will emerge and become warlords. It’ll be interesting to see. Some will be for Römer, some for Minsk, and some will just hate the opposing warlords… Elsa will be torn apart by small constituencies.”

“What a depressing alternative.”

As Leticia said.

Both scenarios are not good. There is also a third option that was not mentioned. Virginia is returning to the presidency. Of course, in that case, it would be difficult to guarantee the safety of the four of us.

“Anyway, we can’t drag this out like this. If we waste time, Elsa is likely to fall apart. So, let’s get Virginia on our side.”

“I don’t like it.”

Camilla immediately blushed. So did Leticia and Cassandra. So I brought up the words I had prepared in advance.

“There’s one good thing about dragging him in. He’s the youngest among us, so we can bully him as much as we want.”

“Is that what you call comfort now?”

Camilla looked slightly upset.

“I’m going to give you a chance to tease me up close as much as you’ve been through so far. Like tickling the soles of your feet with feathers while you sleep…”

“John?”

Leticia crossed her arms. I shrugged.

“Anyway. I like to think of it as something like taxes. No one likes paying taxes. But if you say, ‘If you pay me ten thousand won a month, I will protect you from outside invasions and protect your property and life from all kinds of vicious criminals,’ then isn’t it worth paying? Virginia, that is, can protect us… or even Elsa. After all, she’s the head of state power.”

“How did that woman do it?”

Camilla is still skeptical. I told her what Virginia could do. Not the four of us, but she could do it.

“…how is it?”

All three women looked displeased, but eventually nodded. Still, I’m grateful that they listened to me.

“That’s only if she cooperates. If she continues to be uncooperative, then I’ll just leave her here and go. We’ll hide out to avoid the war, and we can have fun like we are now. Infecting zombies, having a beer with the fanatics every now and then. As long as no shells fall on our heads.”

“It’s not fun.”

Camilla pouted, but her hands were carefully cupping her lower abdomen.

* * * * *

In the past, I worked part-time at a convenience store in a nightlife district. I got to see all sorts of people, and although they looked different, they all didn’t see the part-timers as people. So when Virginia glared at me, it was more like a reward.

“Oh, you’re awake? Did you sleep well?”

She deliberately refused to eat, only drank water occasionally, and stubbornly kept her mouth shut as she tried to sleep. There wasn’t much she could do when her whole body was tied up. Virginia laughed at me as the chains clanked.

“Ah, is it time for torture now?”

“Just wait and see.”

I placed a barbecue grill on the floor and filled it with charcoal. Crackle, I lit the torch and the charcoal caught fire, then soon gave off a gentle heat. I also took out the skewers I had brought in advance.

“How classic.”

Virginia was smiling broadly, but her face was getting wrinkled as she watched the things I was taking out of my bag. Diced onions, carrots, and beef. It was the last beef in the world, miraculously found in the freezer.

There’s green onions. I intentionally placed the green onions on a grill over the charcoal. They’re delicious when you peel them and eat them after they’re cooked well. I skewered each of the prepared ingredients and placed them over the charcoal.

“Really? It’s classic?”

The ingredients were cooked one by one on the charcoal fire, giving off a savory smell. While I was at it, I shook some brandy in there too.

“Is this Minsk?”

“… I know that too!”

“If you don’t know, I was going to give you a sip, but if it tastes familiar, you don’t have to give it to me. I’ll drink it. I’ll enjoy it.”

In front of Virginia, who was tied up tightly, I enjoyed a leisurely meal. Of course, I opened the window slightly because there was a risk of poisoning when lighting charcoal in a closed space.

Thanks to that, the smell of grilling meat wafted in. There was a festival going on outside as well. Although it wasn’t beef, but processed meat like sausage, it was still good enough to gather together and have a party.

“The men who came with you are also eating there.”

Virginia groaned, but her eyes were already half-rolled back. The hunger typical of the unprotected area, coupled with her own unjustified hunger strike. To me, it didn’t seem much different from just throwing a tantrum.

So, I brought up a trick.

“You have one too.”

“No need.”

“I don’t think so.”

He brought a small box that he had prepared in advance in the hallway. It was Minsk marshmallows. There were more than five kinds, not just one, so he prepared them all.

“You haven’t eaten for a few days. If you eat something suddenly, you’ll get an upset stomach. It’s better to start with sweets and eat them little by little. And you said you lived in Minsk when you were young?”

“… … .”

For the first time, Virginia didn’t react in a grumpy manner. Instead, she closed her eyes and turned her head to the side. Well, that’s good enough. I skewered the marshmallows and toasted them, turning them so they wouldn’t stick. They sizzled and cooked nicely on the outside.

And then he slowly ate it in front of Virginia.

“It’s delicious. Is this what Minsk kids eat when they grow up?”

Virginia seemed quite embarrassed. She pretended not to win and tried to look away.

“If you don’t want to eat, don’t eat. But this isn’t rice, it’s a snack. Isn’t this okay?”

Gulp.

Her head was still rebellious, but her body was honest. Virginia really wanted to eat this. But I wouldn’t give it to her first. So she ate it. Virginia’s pupils dilated. Something like a sigh escaped her mouth.

“It doesn’t taste as good as I thought. Why is that?”

“… … !”

Yeah. You’re dying to tell me, right? I know how to roast marshmallows. I even read the instructions on the box. But I’m going to do it poorly on purpose, just to make you even angrier.

“… It would be better to learn it more thoroughly.”

Finally, Virginia spoke up. I did as she told me to keep quiet.

“I don’t know if it went well or not, but would you like to try a bite?”

“…If I ask that, are you planning on piercing my throat with a skewer?”

“No. You should put it on a plate and give it to me. I’m more hygienic than you think.”

He cut off about half of it, placed it on a plate, and thrust it into Virginia’s face. For the sake of dignity, he turned his head slightly and peeked at her out of the corner of his eye. Virginia seemed to be seething, but eventually she stuck out her tongue and licked the plate.

“Ugh.”

“Is it hot?”

“Ah. No.”

No, I don’t think so. She had been starving for so long and now she has something sweet in her mouth. Her expression looks like she’s about to go to heaven. But the amount I gave her was literally just enough to taste. I took out three more marshmallows and roasted them in front of Virginia. Subtly, I could hear the sound of chains rubbing. She was getting impatient.

“Ah. Sorry. You must be very thirsty. Here. Whiskey. Would you like some water?”

“… … .”

You don’t have to say anything. I felt a little annoyed, so I poured her some more whiskey. Virginia took a sip, looking a little more docile than before.

“ha….”

Now, her complexion has returned to normal, as if she is starting to feel better. But her agitated body seems to want more.

“It’s funny. You like marshmallows from Minsk, but you declare war on them.”

This time he held out a whole marshmallow. Virginia squeezed her eyes shut and stretched her neck out to take one in her mouth.

“I’m going to hit Roemer too.”

“… You don’t know anything, John.”

“Of course I don’t know. Anyone can see that it’s a crazy plan. What can a small country do against two powerful countries?”

“A small country?”

Virginia laughed at my words. Of course, she’s laughed at more than one thing, but this time she seemed to be making a bold statement.

“Isn’t it a small country?”

“It’s true that we are a weak country. However, it’s not the strong countries that survive. It’s the countries that survive that are strong. And Elsa has always survived until now. For countless years, for countless hours… Thanks to the goddess of hunger.”

An unexpected name.

“What? Have you become tainted by being here as governor for so long?”

“No. Not at all. It’s a story that the upper class of Römer knows. Minsk doesn’t know at all. In Elsa, only the archaeologists know.”

It was my first time hearing this story, so I was curious. I pulled up a chair and sat down in front of her.

“Really? Tell me a story. What is it?”

“… That’s difficult. I’m hungry and thirsty, so it’s hard to talk…”

Oh my. You came all the way here to haggle.

Well, that’s not too bad. It means you’ve opened your heart to the point where you can make a deal.

“Then what? Do you want some Römer sausage?”

“… I wish I had Elsa.”

“wait.”