Hogwarts, i am Dementor

When a man has a goal, no matter how great the obstacle, he'll find a thousand bizarre ways to overcome it. 

And Cohen's method for quickly and safely earning Sin Points?

Over the next two weeks, Cohen unleashed a series of highly efficient pranks on his fellow first- and second-year students.

Friday morning, after the last Potions class of the week:

"You *must* explain yourself, Mr. Norton," Professor McGonagall said, blocking the doorway to the Potions classroom, her eyes practically shooting sparks. 

"According to Mr. Macmillan, his hair turned green after eating the candy *you* gave him."

"Maybe the candy went bad…" Cohen dodged, "or it's one of my dad's pranks. Last time I heard him say he wanted to dye *my* hair green—"

"Oh, and was the 'suddenly squeaking and turning into a rat' hairpin you gave Miss Abbott also your father's prank, Mr. Norton?" McGonagall emphasized the "Mr." with a sharp edge.

"That was my mom—"

"Detention, one week!" 

McGonagall delivered her verdict: 

"I taught your parents, so I know they wouldn't waste their time on pointless pranks like this. You wouldn't want them summoned to the school two weeks before Christmas, would you? Over the past two weeks, more than a hundred students have come to me complaining about you—some even shrieking that you're the Dark Lord reborn. You should be ashamed! Classmates are supposed to help each other through tough times, not serve as targets for your foolish pranks!"

Their accusations were a bit exaggerated. All Cohen had done was tell some spooky stories in his own dramatic style while secretly siphoning off a little of their happiness. 

If it were Voldemort, he'd have taken their souls and lives, not just their little rainbow unicorns and Babbity Rabbity daydreams.

"Grow up a little and stop picking up childish tricks from the Weasley twins…" McGonagall said earnestly. "You've got real talent in Transfiguration and Charms. If you're that bored, come talk to me or Professor Flitwick about learning something from the next level. Spells aren't toys to mess around with—you need to understand that a single mistake could lead to very serious consequences…"

McGonagall spent nearly half an hour lecturing Cohen on treating his classmates "kindly." Only after he nodded repeatedly and swore he wouldn't pull anything like this again did she reluctantly let him go.

Yes, yes, yes—Cohen admitted he might've gone a bit overboard… 

But setting aside the fact that his reckless spending of Sin Points had left him short of the 2,000 needed to unlock a side quest, wasn't some of the blame on Hogwarts' students too? 

"Are you seriously being this unreasonable?" 

Back in the Room of Requirement, the Earl scoffed at Cohen's "crisis of conscience." 

"I'm eleven years and four months old—being childish is *normal*, okay?!" Cohen flopped onto the bed in the corner, stretching out comfortably.

After two weeks of relentless effort, Cohen had finally boosted his Sin Points.

[Current Sin Points: 1999] 

So close—just one more prank. But who should be his final target? Tough choice— 

Cohen's gaze landed on the endlessly chattering Earl.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!" 

The Earl once again enjoyed the thrill of losing its feathers.

[Ding! Sin Points +1] 

The wool had been sheared bald. Cohen had originally planned to keep farming Sin Points off the Earl, but the darn thing built up a "tolerance." If he kept targeting it, the points it yielded dwindled—until a few days ago, when even turning it into a cup during its "date" with Hedwig didn't earn him a single point.

Luckily, a surprise attack like this still squeezed out a little, making Cohen suspect that earning Sin Points might be tied to how much the target accepted the mischief. 

[Current Sin Points (2000/2000) achieved, Evil Side Quest unlocked] 

[Note: You naturally wicked little Dementor spawn, I'm going to download Genshin Impact into your system.] 

"…" 

Cohen felt like he'd never smile brightly again—wait, no, Dementors don't produce sunshine anyway. That's a sunflower's job.

[Evil Side Quest (1/7)] 

[1. Prevent Harry Potter from obtaining the Philosopher's Stone] 

[Reward: 1000 Sin Points, Mourning Frost (weapon)] 

[Note: Future evil side quests will shift based on your choices. Mind your alignment.] 

"Easy—I'll just take the Philosopher's Stone myself, right?" 

With that, Cohen stopped suppressing his aura— 

"When the hell are you going to turn my feathers back?!" the Earl roared for the second time in this room. "I must've created mosquitoes in my last life to end up as *your* pet in this one!" 

This time, Cohen didn't need to get scolded by Professor Kettleburn. He could now cast the counter-spell to Vanishing Charms.

But maybe the spell brought back a bit too much—because it didn't just restore the Earl's recently vanished feathers, it also brought back the ones Cohen had vanished last time… 

"You little—" 

--- 

By November, the climate in the Scottish Highlands had turned brutal. 

What had been a mildly chilly autumn transformed, in just a month, into a frost-covered wasteland. 

Cohen half-suspected Dumbledore was outright abusing Filch by making him work in the castle—the poor guy had to shovel all the frost off the bricks in front of the castle by himself, without magic. 

It turned Filch into a walking, ticking "detention" bomb during this period. Any young wizard who dared come within five meters of him outdoors was slapped with two days of detention. 

Fred and George had made significant contributions to riling Filch up—they'd sneak out every night to sprinkle water at the castle entrance, making the ice even harder to clear. 

Cohen joined in too.

"You've got to eat some breakfast, Harry." 

On a clear Saturday morning, Cohen looked at Harry—who seemed as stressed as a student about to take a college entrance exam—and offered a friendly nudge. 

"I don't want anything," Harry said, rubbing his temples. 

Today was his first-ever Quidditch match, and to make matters worse, Snape had confiscated Hermione's copy of *Quidditch Through the Ages* that she'd lent him—and he hadn't managed to get it back. 

Plus, Harry had seen something horrifying: Snape's leg, drenched in blood. Harry was convinced it was from Snape trying to get past the three-headed dog guarding the fourth-floor corridor. 

"No arguing there—I think he's behind it too," Cohen said, siding with Harry. 

Snape *had* to be the one stealing the Philosopher's Stone, right? 

Voldemort was a strong contender too… 

Quirrell was hiding too well— 

Wait a second—who the heck was Cohen Norton? 

(End of Chapter)