Hero For Lust

Caspian's gamble had paid off. By waiting until the last day before his removal from the Hero Registry for failing to meet his quota, all he had to do was show up in Z-City and stand around. Boring, but a guaranteed way to fulfill his quota without being mistaken for a villain by running around like a madman.

As expected Sonic found him and Caspian had to admit it was fun to mess with him. Nearly bursting into laughter when he snatched the ninjato from Sonic and tossed it away. Though he had almost ended a lady's life with that careless act—but honestly, she shouldn't have been standing there.

Caspian eyed the crowds of people scattered throughout the business district. Already, some of them had turned their attention to the pair.

While Sonic's eyes darted around, searching for his missing weapon, a nagging woman's voice tore apart the silence.

"That's him! He's very, very dangerous. Please stop him."

What? I refuse to believe anyone here could see me fling away his blade.

"So you're the offender, eh?!" the huge muscular man beside the woman flexed his arms. "Well, the hero Tanktop Tiger is here now!"

Caspian grinned and said, "Sonic, let's see how you handle this. I wonder how fast you can escape your cell w—"

A large hand clasped down on his head. "She means you, cue ball."

"Huh?"

The nagging woman yapped once more. "I've watched the news. This man is a lingering remnant of the 'Paradise Group.'"

"A blatant lie!" Caspian raised his hands in protest. "I'm a hero too!"

"I've never heard of a hero like you."

"Who cares whether you know of me or not? I'm new!"

"In any case, you're causing problems for everyone. If you're really a hero, then don't go around looking like a member of a known terrorist group.

You're hurting all the other heroes' reputation."

What kind of trash reasoning is that? Sonic you better deal with 'Stripes' here real quick.

"Hey, isn't that Tanktop Tiger?"

"Oh yeah, it is Tanktop Tiger."

"No way!"

"Awesome. He's the real deal!"

The onlooker's voices cried out.

Tanktop Tiger, towering above Caspian, smugly looked around. "Even C-Class Heroes get recognized if they're in the top 10." He then bent over his face a bit too close to Caspian's. "Wanna go a little wild here and make me look good?"

Now Sonic! Teach him a lesson!

Unfortunately, no 'Exploding Shuriken' arrived to save the day.

Tanktop Tiger's smug expression widened. "I'll make it painless for you. You can even take the first swing."

Caspian glanced back only to find that Sonic had run off. Damn ninja!

Before he had to resort to anything rash, a beautiful voice shouted from the heavens.

"'Hail of Carnage!'"

Several explosions thundered from multiple buildings.

"It's your lucky day, cue ball. Let me show you how real heroes act."

The plethora of people cried for Tanktop Tiger's help.

It's unfortunate then that before he could even reach Sonic, a stray shuriken exploded in his face, rendering him unconscious.

Following that, everyone one fled crying for another hero to save them.

Caspian wished he could fly up and give Sonic a high-five for his heroic act, but he had a quota to fill.

"Haha! Caspian, with him out of the way, you're the last hero standing. Now that I have my weapon back, you've got no chance."

Sonic remained airborne, raining down mayhem on the city.

Caspian surveyed the area until he saw a crying young boy. In a flash, he stood behind the boy and smacked away the car that was about to crush him.

Several seconds later.

"If you're not coming, I'll go to you!"

Caspian vanished from the street and reappeared the airborne Sonic. "That's my signal!"

A swift karate chop and one Sonic-shaped crater were all it took for him to meet his quota.

Caspian landed beside the crater, looking downward. "Later Sonic, I'll see you the next time it rains, probably."

¤ ¤ ¤

The following day…

Busho sat in a large room, lit only by the countless electronic lights, his eyes scanning the reports glowing on his computer screen.

"The man apprehended in Z-City by the C-Class Hero is suspected of being involved in several heinous crimes, including assassination."

Busho pondered his co-workers' words before pulling up a different screen on his computer. "This C-Class Hero Caspian matches the reports witnesses gave regarding Heavy Kong's assailant in W-City. Have we confirmed this information?"

After a moment of silence, the co-worker from across the dark room answered. "Yes. Though, several anonymous reports came in stating Heavy Kong was the instigator"

"How so?"

"The reports claimed Heavy Kong accused the duo of being monster apologists."

Busho's eyes narrowed. "More monster apologist accusations? W-City is getting out of hand. There's no need to investigate Caspian any further regarding this matter."

"Should we cease the other ongoing investigation you requested about him?"

"No..." Busho pulled up Caspian's records. "…instead we need to dig deeper. For him to defeat an A-Class Hero… We must uncover his true depths.

Moving on. What's the status of the other investigation I requested?"

A young woman, Z Branch Operator, typed away. "The one for Z-City Ghost Town?"

"Yes."

"Let's see… We've submitted an official request. Tornado is also on the assignment."

Busho leaned back in his chair. "I'm aware. Concerning this investigation, Tornado showed a level of stubbornness the Association hadn't seen before.

What exactly is happening in Z-City Ghost Town?"

¤ ¤ ¤

"If it means running into monsters like this all the time, I wouldn't want to live here either." The hero said before collapsing onto the concrete.

"Man, boring. This is boring me! I finally kick a hero's butt and I don't get even a single scream.

Now that I think about it, even if I start living here, I'll never be famous if there's no people. Guess I'll keep going. Gotta find where they live."

Kombu Infinity had traveled all this way seeking a rumored powerful foe, yet the first opponents he encountered were a pair of weakling heroes who brought him no enjoyment. Was this entire trip destined to be a pointless endeavor?

As Kombu Infinity walked away, a voice called out from above.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"How?!" Kombu Infinity lost control of his body and flew upward before stopping in front of the speaker. "The rumors weren't a complete lie, but I hadn't guessed the 'Tornado of Terror' would be 'The Ghost Town Monster.'"

"What did you call me seaweed?"

Kombu Infinity's body trembled under the invisible force as Tornado slowly closed her open hand, the pressure tightening around him like a vice.

Is this it? I wouldn't have made my way here if I knew she was the rumored 'Monster.'

"Hey! What are you trying to do with my soup stock?"

Kombu Infinity regained control of his body and dropped onto the narrow street, his bloodshot eye locking onto the man who had just spoke.

A normal guy. I guess there's no reason for humans to clear out with the 'Tornado of Terror' here. And did he just call me his 'soup stock...?'

The man stood in a plain blue tracksuit, bald, and carrying a single grocery bag in his left hand. He was the embodiment of ordinary, yet his following words were anything but.

"Good girl."

Why is this guy antagonizing her?

Up in the sky, Tornado clenched her little fists. "Say that again, Caspian."

She knows him?!

Caspian held out his arms. "Good girl. Now come here and let daddy have a little squeeze."

The moment Kombu Infinity decided to flee from this suicidal maniac, the ground quaked. Concrete and buildings tore free from the earth, lifting him along with the rising debris.

Kombu Infinity glanced away from Tornado toward the bald moron who still wore a stupid look on his face as he floated in the air.

Apologize to her! I just want to leave. I can find enjoyment anywhere.

Kombu Infinity's wish for an apology would never come true.

"Tatsumaki, I'll be stealing your lips today, I promise."

Despair filled Kombu Infinity. We're dead.