Heretical Fishing: A Cozy Guide to Annoying the Cults, Outsmarting the Fish, and Alienating Oneself

Pleasant heat washed over me, making a smile spread over my face. Fragrant steam rose from the barbecue plate, bringing with it the scents of beef tallow, fresh fish, woodsmoke, and myriad herbs and spices. I’d seasoned each slab of mature blue fish with a different combination of seasonings, and my mouth watered as I considered how they’d all taste.

In the few hours the residents of New Tropica and I spent fishing for the celebratory feast, we’d caught more than enough. The entire barbecue was covered in thick slabs of mature blue fish, only thin gaps between them revealing the cooking surface below. Tallow hissed and spat around the edges of the fish, bubbling up and crisping every bit of flesh it touched.

Taking a deep breath, I bathed in the flavors suffusing the air. I exhaled slowly, leaning into the welcome warmth rising up from before me.

The filets were ready to turn.

One by one, I flipped each of them, revealing perfectly cooked, golden-hued skin.

“All right,” Peter said, stepping up beside me. “I agreed to let you help, now go socialize.” He waved me away with both hands. “Shoo. It’s your feast, after all.”

I laughed at him, holding my ground. “You dare shoo me? The great and venerable Fischer?”

He blew air from his lips, telling me exactly what he thought of that description.

“Besides,” I continued. “It’s not my feast. It’s everyone else’s.”

“Point taken.” He rubbed his chin and frowned, glancing between me and the barbecue plate, a glint in his eye. “Tell you what, since you asked so nicely, I will allow you to remain and help me cook the fish.”

I bowed theatrically. “Lord Peter is gracious! This lowly one thanks you.”

“Oh, stop that.” He lifted me up by the shoulders, rolling his eyes. “You’ll plant the wrong idea in my apprentices’ minds.”

I smirked at said apprentices, seeing nervous grins on their faces. “I wouldn’t worry about that, mate. They already know I’m a full-blown goose.”

“It’s true,” Maria called, striding around the corner onto my back patio. “It only takes a look to diagnose Fischer as a goose.”

“See?” I nodded sagely. “Nothing to worry about.”

Maria stepped up beside me, resting an arm on my back. “The food on the fire is almost ready. We’ve already removed the vegetables.”

“Perfect timing.” I wrapped my arm around her waist. “These will be done in a moment, too.”

As swift and soft as a summer breeze, she darted in to plant a kiss on my cheek. I watched her go, my heart racing as she glanced over her shoulder and gave me what was possibly the most beautiful smile I’d ever seen, then disappeared from sight.

“A good lesson, apprentices,” Peter said. “Never let your love enter the kitchen. See how distracted Fischer is? He isn’t focused on the food, and it might—”

He cut off as I clacked my tongs in front of his face, threatening to pinch him if he continued. He just laughed at me, showing absolutely no remorse.

In the blink of an eye, his demeanor turned serious. “Jokes aside, Fischer, I want to try something...”

“Oh? What’s that?”

“Well, you know how we haven’t been able to unlock a boon from your barbecue yet? I was thinking we could both try pouring our will into it.”

“Ohhh! You want to try brute forcing it? I am so down.”

He stepped up beside me, and as we both stared down at the almost-cooked fish, I sent my will out into the world. I felt Peter’s there too. It was potent, revealing his level of cultivation, but was notably less focused than mine. I sent strands of my chi out, helping shape and guide his strands toward the barbecue. At first, Peter’s will railed against my influence. I sensed his surprise, and after only a moment, he lowered his walls, letting our intentions join.

With our wills aligned, I closed my eyes, focusing entirely on the barbecue and the food cooking atop it.

The hotplate had its own chi that ran through it, gathering strongest where the fish touched. It was doing something, but I couldn’t work out what. Rather than try to comprehend the essence’s purpose, I pictured what I wanted. What we wanted. The food was for all of our friends and acquaintances, its chi and nutrition an offering.

Peter’s consciousness pulsed in protest—he disagreed.

My eyebrow furrowing, I let his intent roll over mine, coloring it. He wasn’t content with providing only what the fish already held. He dreamed of more. Feeling both embarrassment and understanding, I blew air from my nose. He was completely right. Why should I be happy with what the fish already provided? I wanted to give my pals everything possible. I wanted the world itself to contribute and bestow upon the food whatever it could spare.

Shooting Peter a mental nod of gratitude, I redoubled my efforts, letting chi flow from me in a steady stream.

Peter’s will was with me; he opened up the gates to his core, giving everything he had. As we released more and more into the surrounding world, the land noticed. Essence flowed up like groundwater burbling to the surface. It didn’t head toward the barbecue though, instead lingering in the air around waist height. Nonplussed by the anomalous occurrence, Peter and I fortified our intention.

This feast was to be a physical representation of our gratitude. We had brought strangers to our village, and though we had freed them from the shackles of slavery, they were free to do what they wanted. Some had chosen to rebel, and even with that corrupting force allowed to roam free, most of them had instead aligned themselves with New Tropica and the church. They’d even come forward of their own accord to let Barry know what was going on, well and truly passing the test he’d laid for them.

I felt a spark of amusement, imagining their faces when Barry revealed that he knew and had planned for it.

Chi continued rising from the ground, forming into small droplets instead of strands as it so often did. Abruptly, I noticed that it wasn’t just in the surrounding patio; it was happening on the sands too, especially toward the ocean just east of us, which was where the feast was to take place. The spherical sources of power were like thousands of glowing orbs in my mind’s eye, casting a welcoming light over everything their light touched.

Realizing I’d become distracted, I dismissed the thought, immediately returning to the task at hand.

It had been less than a minute since we’d started, and the fish was nearing its completion. I sent my awareness down into the meat, as did Peter. Someone called my name from the waking world, but I ignored them, knowing the pivotal moments had arrived. The person called again, even louder this time—I paid them no mind. The bubbles of chi wavered as I willed them into the food, ordering them to obey. They shook, condensed, yet held their position. I swept my chi around, trying to corral them forward, but it was like attempting to move boulders with a breeze.

I returned to my body, then sent my awareness toward the barbecue. It was now or never; the fish was cooked, and if they remained any longer, they would start to burn. Something shifted around us, making a pressure build in the air. I sent curiosity toward Peter, getting only elation in return.

Elation...? I wondered. What are you so—

His thoughts bulldozed over mine, flattening them. He had gained insight, and given we were mentally joined in a task, his newfound knowledge raced through me. This was what Peter existed for. His goal wasn’t the mere act of cooking. His fate, his very purpose in life, was food. Through it, he could communicate... everything. Love, gratitude, kindness, sorrow, regret. Even anger could be channeled into a dish, turning a regular meal into something passion-filled. In response to his understanding, chi shot up from beneath him in vast ropes, winding out into the world in a complicated mesh.

Oh, I realized all too late. He’s having a breakthrough.

The chi slammed down into him, rocketing toward his core, and as it did, the orbs of chi finally moved. The closest spheres to us appeared within the barbecue in an instant, their glow transferring to the hotplate. Those on the sand did something else, but I didn’t have time to consider what that was.

There was an explosion.

Chi shot from Peter in every direction, and though it wasn’t like Roger’s blade-like chi, the force was ready to burn everything away. At the last possible instant, I ripped my awareness back and surrounded Peter with it, bottling the detonation. Well, I tried to, at least. A wave of pressure struck my chest, and though I didn’t move, Peter’s three apprentices were blasted backward, skidding to a stop just before striking the rock wall.

I dashed forward as I released my chi, catching his unconscious form just in time to stop his head from colliding with the ground. With him secure, I checked on the food.m and my heart sank.

The fish was nowhere to be seen; it must have been vaporized by the breakthrough.

“What...?” Peter said, groaning as he sat up. “Did I...?”

I grinned. “You certainly did, mate.”

“Fischer!” Maria yelled.

I glanced toward the patio entrance, finding only her head visible as she peeked around the side.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“What’s up?” she repeated, giving me an are-you-fracking-serious look. “You have to come see this. Now.” Without another word, she disappeared from sight, her footfalls growing faint as she jogged back to the rest of our pals.

Peter and I raised an eyebrow at each other. I shrugged. “I guess we should go check out whatever magical shenanigans your breakthrough caused. Can you stand?”

Peter nodded, letting me help him to his feet. He clenched and unclenched his fists, his eyes going wide. “This... wow. This is my power?”

“Certainly is, mate. You feel just as strong as Roger. Nowhere near as sharp though, which is nice.”

I’d already sent a tendril of chi out to feel the aspect he’d taken on. It was interesting, to say the least. There was a steady heat there, but it wasn’t like the flames that Trent seemed to command. It was more akin to the heat that radiated off a bed of embers.

“You said Roger feels like a blade, right?” he asked, walking for the exit. “What... what do I feel like?”

“Honestly, mate? You feel like a heat-source. It might be the perfect power for someone who aspires to create experiences with food.”

He missed a step, stumbling to catch himself as his eyes darted toward mine. “You, uh, felt that…?”

“Yeah, mate,” I said, laughing at his sheepish expression. “Nothing to be ashamed of—I think it’s a grand purpose. And the System clearly agreed.”

Though his apprentices followed us, they said not a word, simply trailing and watching their teacher with awed expressions.

The moment we walked around the corner of the patio and onto the sand, a roar of voices reached my ears. It sounded as though every single citizen of New Tropica was fighting to be heard over one another, their conversations only growing louder with our approach.

When I caught sight of them, I froze.

They were crowding around the tables we’d set up, gesturing wildly and yelling to each other to be heard over the din. Atop the tables, where we’d intended to place all the food made for the feast, bubbles of thick, golden chi hid whatever was beneath them. I walked forward on uneasy legs, reaching out with my senses to try and understand what was going on.

“There you are!” Maria called, catching sight of me. She dashed over, excitement held in every line of her face. “What did you guys do?”

I blinked at the concealing bubbles, then at Peter. “What the frack did we do, mate?”

“I... don’t know.”

I turned back to Maria. “Peter had a breakthrough, and I was too distracted keeping the explosion contained to notice what happened out here. What did you see?”

“Chi rose from the ground and formed little orbs the same color as the ones covering the table. They just floated there. I ran over to try to get your attention, but you were too focused on the barbecue.”

“Oh, that was you calling? Sorry—I heard you but had to focus. How did they get onto the table...?” I pointed at the massive line of coals that ran along the sand. “And what happened to the rest of the food?”

There had been dozens of blue fish cooking there, along with stacks of root vegetables, but the pans, and the food within, were gone.

“I was hoping you knew,” she said. “The veggies were on the table, but the fish was still cooking. The golden orbs all radiated a blinding light. When I opened my eyes again, they were covering the tables and all the food was hidden.”

Taking her hand in mine, I walked forward. The crowd noticed our approach and parted, letting us come up beside the table. The sea of bubbles seemed to call me forward, and my arm reached out of its own accord. I paused for a single moment, my finger mere millimeters from an orb the size of my head. Swallowing, I forged forward.

When my skin made contact, light and chi exploded outward, washing over me.

I stood slack jawed, staring at the words that appeared in my vision and dulled the blinding glow coming from the feast.