hazbin hotel universe harem x male reader

If you would like to support me check out my new Ko-fi.com/noahkiller05 page where you can also get 5 plus chapters

——————————————————————

It was just like any other day, with buildings burning and dead bodies all over the place. Babies are getting kicked into space. It's just your normal day.

y/n was looking up at a building that had horns of some kind sticking out from it. He was about to go inside before someone got thrown out the window and smacked hard through the ground.

???: I-m ok…..

He said weakly from the hole that he was in.

???: and don't come back till you get the femboy over here!

(Image here)

He was questioning whether coming to this place was a good idea. Now that he had thought about it, why did he come to this place again?

*a few hours ago*

Angel: Oh baby right there that the spot keeps going.

Y/n: like this right

Angel: yeah just like that come on go faster and harder

y/n: don't worry I'm going to make you feel so good from this.

angel: oh yeah baby give it to me I'm almost there come on go faster.

He complied by holding her down by her two arms as his hands moved down her body.

Y/n: just leave your body to me and I'll make you feel good.

Angel:" huffing" I'm "huffing" almost there just a bit more.

Vaggie charged into the room with her spear in hand.

Vaggie: What the hell is going on here!?

Vaggie look at the two seeing Angel on a table lying down with y/n on top of her body with his hands pushing down on the spot of her body

y/n: oh hey vaggie is there something you need?

Angel: yeah huh why did you suddenly barge in here?

Angel face:(image here)

Vaggie took a step back not expecting to see something else. She has a small blush on her grey skin.

y/n: don't worry that was just Angel fucking making it weird with everything she was saying.

Angel: aw why did you have to ruin my fun y/n

She sat up and turned her body to sit on the table's edge.

Angel: so was it convincing huh vaggie did you think we were in here fucking each other.

Vaggie: uh huh agh sh-shut up.

y/n hopped off the table and felt his phone going off. He pulled it out and saw a random number calling him. He put it next to his ear and accepted the call.

???: hey, uh this is y/n right?

Y/n: yeah it is who is this?

Blitzø: it uh Loona's father Blitzø remembers from the loo loo land.

Y/n: oh yeah I remember what can I help you with Blitzø?

Blitzø: Well I need your help with my loony. We need her for our job but I need her to be focused on it so could you come down?

He looked around at what was happening in the room and Charlie was now there and was trying to keep everyone calm.

Charlie: come on vaggie let's head back into the main hall. see I said nothing was happening in here.

Angel: yeah babe go with your little sweetie and leave me with snookums here.

She pointed with one of her hands behind her toward where y/n was. However, when the three looked he was gone.

*present*

He stood after realizing he didn't want to be in the middle of all that so he decided to come over and see what he could do for Loona.

He looked back at the body-shaped hole as a hand popped out and a head as well as it hit the ground. He looked familiar to him. Now that he thought about it he was pretty sure he was one of the other imps that worked with Blitzø.

The poor imp opened his mouth and his teeth started to fall out. y/n just walked into the building not thinking anymore about it, he went to the floor that Blitzø told him to head to,

He found a door that had a paper on it with some horrible ass handwriting. It read I.M.P. He let out a sigh before opening the door and heading in. The room he was in looked like a waiting room.

Looking around at the place it was not that bad. He walked past a room but stopped when he heard someone talking behind it. It looked like a conference room. He was not sure if he should head in or not but he went ahead and opened it heading inside.

Inside he saw three people one was Loona on her phone not paying attention but the other was Blitzø and that one imp girl. If he remembered it was Millie she was the first one to notice him and wave at him and had a big smile on her face.

Millie: Oh hey their y/n right?!

That is when Loona's ears twitch and turn to the direction of their talk.

Y/n: yeah and you're Millie right?

Millie: aw you remember.

It's kinda hard to forget something like seeing her change her clothes right in front of him when they were in the van that one time.

He noticed Blitzø making his way over to the two.

Y/n: oh hey Blitzø uh why were you asking for Oiled up femboy?

Blitzø: oh that yeah I need fuck ton oli up femboy so that we can have a massive orgy later.

y/n: (image here)

Millie: hey come on sir, you will fry his brain if you say it like that. He sent moxxie to go find some femboy to help us beat that bitch from the room across from us.

Blitzø: don't even get me started on that fucking whore of a bitch.

y/n: woah sounds like you have some beef with this person

Millie: his ex stole our parking spot and did you know he dated a pop star?

Y/n: shit really?  Well good for him.

Blitzø: HA see it's not that hard to see me with one

Loona let out a sigh then got out of her chair and walked over to y/n.

Loona: Y-Y/n it's good to see you but what are you doing here?

Y/n: oh your-

He saw Blitzø making a quiet motion with his hand. It looked like he did not want him saying anything about him needing him to watch Loona.

What did Blitzø say again about this thing? He thought about it then he knew what to say.

Y/n: Blitzø asked me for help with this thing you guys were doing.

Millie&loona: He did?

Blitzø made a loud cough as he walked over.

Blitzø:Yeah I did I thought we could get more of those fuck tards killed faster by having two people pulling people to them

Millie: That's a great idea, sir.

Blitzø: thanks Mills. So gear up because we have a lot of killing to do

The two walked away leaving him and Loona by themself.

Loona: "sighs" Blitzø called you over to watch me didn't he?

Y/n: it's because he cares about you

Loona: As if he only trying to embarrass me because I saw some-

y/n looked at her because she went quiet her face turned red before she shook it off.

Loona: Stop looking at me like that, 

Y/n:sorry it's just why you are mad at him.

loona:nothing he is just trying to make my life horrible is all.

Y/n: well I came because I don't want anything bad to happen to you out there.

Loona: stop saying stuff like that...thank you though.

He patted her shoulder as she looked at him with a small smile.

Loona: soooo you were with that bird girl right?

Y/n: Octavia?

Loona: yeah her why were you with her?

Y/n: oh she sent me a message asking if I wanted to come over because she was bored and let's just say it was an interesting experience.

Loona: you two fuck?

Y/n looked at her with a deadpan face

Loona: Alright I get it you both didn't. It's just the photo you posted of her kinda has the look of someone who just got her brains fucked.

He notices her tail wagging around from his response. 

Loona: hey so would you be down to hang out sometime again?

Y/n: of course, I would be down to.

Blitzø was making his way over to the two with a grin on his face. While he was walking over y/n took a look behind himself taking his claws out.

Blitzø: Alright, who is ready to beat that bitch for our parking spot!

y/n: yeah I'm ready.

As he says that he pulls up his tail in his right hand.

Loona:... 

She leans back to take a look at where his tail should be. All she saw was blood pouring out from the point where the tail was ripped out at

Loona: Why did you cut your tail off!?

Y/n: I need a disguise don't I?

A tear was falling down his face from the pain

Loona: Why didn't you just cast a spell?

Y/n: I can't do magic like some people

Loons: you just need to remember the spell and say it correctly.

Y/n: you tell me that after I already cut it off.

"Later, place: the beach"

Blitzø: alright let's get this shit done!

Loona: Do you have to be screaming when you say that?

Blitzø: oh sorry my sweet loony

Loona: agh shut up da-Blitzø

Blitzø's eyes sparkled when she almost called him dad. While that was happening they were all under a sea walk bored. y/n took a step out from behind the walk. His skin looked just like how when he was alive. He wore a hat on his head with sunglasses covering his eyes.

He only had swim trunks on, and with his tail completely gone he looked human again.

Loona walked over to him in her human disguise.

Loona: So this is how you looked when you were alive well I can say you're looking pretty good y/n.

Y/n: you don't look so bad yourself loona you're pretty cute.

She tries to hide her blushing face from him.

Y/n: I just hope I don't get into any trouble for being up here especially because I'm a sinner.

Blitzø: Hey don't worry about it, what you should be concerned about is winning, we can not lose our parking spot to that bitch. Now let's get to work.

As he says that he pulls out a pistol. Loona walked out to some guy as Blitzø went to the high point area. y/n turns to Millie.

(Image here)

(goddamn those thighs. I would happily die for those)

Millie: Let's get ther' done y/n!

y/n: yeah we got this.

He took a look down at the list and saw a couple of people whose names fit how they look.

He went up to one of the girls on the beach.

Y/n: hey there girl you want to have some fun.

Girl: oh are you trying to rizz me up like you from Ohio?

Y/n places his hand on his chest where his heart is at. He shook his head. Maybe it was just this person.

Y/n: sure am

He pointed at the rocks behind him, she nodded at him and they walked behind the rock. She wrapped her arms around moving close before Millie came out of nowhere and kicked her causing her to hit her head on the rocks killing her.

Millie: see your nature at this just keep on bringing the ladies over here

Y/n: ye-yeah you're right.

He lets out a sigh before walking out to another girl.

y/n: hey there girl you trying to hook up?

Girl: with your gyatt, you wouldn't even be able to bag two Skibidi

Y/n:(image here)

He didn't even wait, he pulled out one of his claws and slit her throat. She was grabbing her throat as y/n placed her onto the sand. The blood got sucked up by the sand.

He couldn't believe the words these people were saying he was not sure if it was because he was old but he tried to stay up-to-date on the new slang but this gen slang they were something else

He took a step back to where they were leading people

Millie: Hey what's wrong why didn't you bring her over to me?

Y/n: sorry I just lost my temper from what she said.

Millie: Oh how come?

Y/n: nothing, don't worry. Let's see if I can speed this up.

He walked over to a good spot and grabbed at his trunks, lowering them showing off a bit of the asset that he has.

He called out to a group of girls that were getting a tan. They looked up at him and they were surprised but one of them liked what she was seeing. They were gossiping with each other before they got up and walked over to him.

He was set up next to the rock as they got close Millie came out and used her tail to rip off one of their heads and throw her knife at the two others.

She jumped and dived into the sand kinda like a rabbit he could see where she was going as she got to the body she pulled them down with her.

After all that her head popped up from the sand

Millie: nice idea to show off your body more you even had me wanting to come over.

Y/n: don't you have a husband?

Millie: moxxie yeah we are together but he likes to get pegged so I don't get to feel good too often even when he decides to fuck me I don't really feel it. He is on the smaller side don't tell him I told you that alright we can keep this between us alright?

He just stared at her not sure what to do as he felt like he had learned a bit too much about her whole thing.

Millie: and from the glimpse that I saw of your "big" friend of yours is packing a good treat.

He thought to himself for a moment what he had to lose by not playing along with her. Get beat up by that one imp who seems too scared to do anything. Fuck it he might as well see where this whole thing leads.

Y/n: well with how good your body is my friend would find it hard not to want to try it out.

She let out a giggle at his little response

Millie: Just for you know I'm a good old farm girl underneath you really think you can take me on?

Y/n: well there is always a first try for something and why not try to conquer a farm girl? I mean you did change in front of me that one time,

Millie: Hey, that's not fair I needed to do that for my job.

Y/n: so your jobs need you to not be wearing a bra? You could have also just had me leave the car.

Millie: Well you like the view don't you?

Y/n: yeah it was a very interesting scene to see.

Before they could say anything, Blitzø threw a bag of bodies toward them.

Blitzø: hey you two better not be slacking off over there we need to beat that bitch. I doubt she could make that many people fucking piss, squirt, or cum that fast.

However, out of nowhere, there was a concert stage with light and smoke going off with someone talking on the stage….. No, really he was wondering where the stage even came from.

Millie: Oh that's the person we are fighting over there.

Y/n: the girl on the stage?

She nodded her head at him. The person on the stage started to sing and for some unknown reason, there was a heart floating around her head.

Y/n: she is a succubus isn't she?

Blitzø was now standing next to them watching the whole thing. He had his arms holding onto the side of his other arm.

Blitzø: more like succubitch.

Y/n: what the fuck how did this beach go from 13+ to 18+ there is even a girl sucking a hotdog sexually over there.

Blitzø: fuck she doing that fucking mating call making these fucker actuting like horny teens in a 90s horror movie.

Y/n: hey uh Blitzø 

Blitzø: what!

Y/n: we lost Loona.

His eyes opened as he looked around for her

Blitzø: wh-wh-where is my baby at!?

Millie: look!

Blitzø looked at where she pointed and saw her heading after the buff black guy who may or may not have the name of Tyrone

Blitzø went after her leaving y/n anMillieie by themself. He just looked aMillieie.

Y/n: ok I got an idea you go and just kill people in the crowI'llll deal with the music.

Millie: Are you sure about this?

Y/n: no way now let's do this. He started running to the crowd of people as Millie followed behind him.

Millie was going left and right killing people some were in the middle of doing it while others were drowned to death

While she was doing that y/n got close to the stage not seeing the black guy around anymore. He took his phone out and clicked on the Bluetooth for the speakers and he clicked play on the song.

(Song here)

(Image here)

Someone: HEY WHO CHANGE THE MUSIC

Y/n:(image here)

They start grabbing him and pulling him almost crowd surfing but with punches and he is pretty sure someone stole his wallet.

???: Hey wait, bring the person who did that up here. 

They threw him onto the stage.

???: hey there handsome you are pretty daring for doing that. How about if you don't do that again I can have one of my friends help you Let some steam off

She made a hand job motion. He noticed a strange mist coming off of her. Now he can't lie she was pretty hot, with good boobs, nice thighs, and a great ass as well. He had a small smile on his face.

Y/n: bitch please if you're going to try to seduce me. you're going to need to hit me with the strong stuff. Instead of this small stuff.

She looked at him confused about why her pheromones weren't working on him.

???: Wait, why is it not working on you? You should be head over heels for me or even want to have sex but nothing is going on with you.

Y/n: I have seen a lot of porn so your little pheromones aren't going to work on me.

Another reason was because something like this happened to him before when he was still alive so this didn't hit him that hard.

???: fuck someone get this fucker off my stage.

y/n: oh nooo whatever shall I do naw I got this don't worry plus I see the fucker who took my wallet get back here you fucker.

y/n ran off the stage not giving her the satisfaction of doing it he ran and tackled the guy and beat the living shit out of him, making sure to get his wallet back. 

He walked out of the crowd looking away, not sure what to do at the moment. He felt something moving underneath him looking down and saw Millie popping out

millie: So much for your plan huh?

y/n: hey I was trying something at least. But anyway I think we should-

As he turn to her he saw Millie being hit with a tongue and getting pulled into a creature's mouth and what was going through his head was damn she really got eaten by a fish thing,

He looks around quickly as the fish thing lets out a big scream making people run away.

He saw people running past an alcohol jug and he got an idea. He got the jug and tied it down around his waist. He pulled out his claws on both of his hands.

He started rubbing at it while the fish threw his fins at him which he jumped over and was running up its fibs leading up to its neck he saw that it was fighting something in its mouth before one of its teeth got sent flying away.

He saw Millie crawling out from the lost teeth she was climbing up to its eyes as she took her knife out from her mouth and started stabbing it in the eyes.

As y/n got to the mouth he took the jug off, started a fire and threw it into the jug before kicking into its mouth.

y/n jumped away from the fish thing just as its head blew but chunks sent them flying, he landed on the ground safe and sound. He looked up as he heard a sound coming from above he saMillieie heading toward him, 

He moved around all over the place til he was able to catch her. He let out a sigh he turned around with her in his arms walking over to Blitzø

Millie: Aw thanks for catching me y/n.

He placed her down as he saw a group with that one girl from earlier coming over.

Y/n: yeah it's no problem.

???: Blitzø

Blitzø turned to look at her.

???: That was very obvious, don't you think?

Millie grabbed something from her pocket as she put it in her face.

Millie: I don't think this belongs to any of us.

She then threw it at the woman as she caught it. Millieie: would be ashamed if someone were to find out that you caused a giant monster fish to kill all these people.

In the background, y/n was standing next to a person who seemed kinda like he had been at war

The guy:(image here)

y/n looked around as he started making his way back trying to not be seen next to the guy as the guy looked at all the blood and bodies around him.

Millie came over to him climbing up his body and grabbing at his collarbone.

Millie: Fuck yeah Y/n we won.

Blitzø: You beat your sweat as we won. We showed that bitch who is the boss around here.

Y/n: uh fuck yeah we won I told you my plan will help.

Millie: yeah sure did but we won that is all that matters!

She hopped off of him onto the ground and started putting blood on the ground writing strange words as the port opened. It was back in the room of their building. She waved at him before jumping into the portal.

He followed after her but before so he turned to that woman who was walking away

Y/n: imagine losing to Imps how fucking embarrassing

He flipped her off before leaning into the portal. She was confused about who that person even was.

He was hanging around as Loona went through the portal. He walked over to her noticing something was off with her.

Y/n: hey what's wrong Loona?

She gave him the side eye.

Loona: It's nothing.

Y/n: don't make me start calling you loony.

Loona: god fuck no please don't that already fucking annoying

He just stared at her with his eyes. She let out a sigh before leaning against the wall.

Loona: There was a hot hellhound and I was trying to talk him up and I just found out that he has a girlfriend.

Y/n: oh I see well loona that's just how life is don't let it get in your way. Plus you're one of the badass hellhounds I know.

He patted her shoulder before heading over to Blitzø. Loons was watching him with a small blush on her face.

Y/n: hey Blitzø I'm going to head out now it getting pretty late and sorry about not helping with Loona.

Blitzø: eh don't worry about it you help us put that bitch in her place but hey how would you feel having a job kinda like what we did today.

Y/n: you want to give me a job here?

Blitzø: you know under table stuff but yeah why not

Y/n: I'll think about it and get back to you on that

He got up and went out the door after a couple of minutes moxie came through the door with a lot of femboy

Moxie: sir I got them just as you ask.

Blitzø: fucking M I ask for that motherfucking 5 hours ago. I don't even need them anymore

Moxxie: eh

Millie: Come on love why it took you so long to get here?

Moxie: I don't want to talk about it.

He looked behind himself to look at one of the femboy who had a belt in his hand straining it apart

*back with Y/n*

He walked through the hotel door looking at the place. It was a mess. Charlie walked over to him and her hair looked messed up.

charlie: we are having a bonding experience and you have to come this time got it.

Y/n: oh uh yeah I'm fine with that.

She started walking away with a hast in her step.

Well, nothing like bonding with each other he thought to himself.

Word count 4346

Alright everyone this story will be going on break while it will continue on Patreon for a bit. But I will also be heading on break before working on them so anyway I hope you like this chapter.