Gotham's Dead End Bar

[AN: Last interlude chapter before we get back to the Dead End proper on Sunday. That'll begin a long-anticipated Sean story (at least, long anticipated for me). I'll give you all a hint: Boobs, oppai, tatas, banging breasty bongo-bazongas. 'Double D's', you might say... Also, a twist I don't think many of you will see coming ;]

"Alright, everyone, settle down," Clark chided gently, trying to bring order to the Justice League meeting of the day. "Yes, that means you too, John. Focus on the meeting, please."

"Which one?" Three voices asked in synch.

One was all too serious and rigid. John Stewart — Green Lantern — quickly put his ring and the sector-wide map of alerts that begged for this attention to the side despite what he'd asked. The second 'John' — Constantine — was all too grumpy, grumbling as he was made to put down a fascinating book on surviving succubi — a subject he'd taken particular interest in as of late. The last 'J'onn' — Manhunter — was all too airy, almost distracted as he tried to subtly stash a bong beneath the table.

Clark just stared at them, his gaze shifting over all three 'Johns'. One was obviously a bigger offender than the other two. Manhunter was usually much more discreet about his habits. He hadn't been the same after the League's encounter with Mew. Clark found himself having to chastise his Martian friend to try and get him to keep his… indulgence… in private.

The same could be said for Constantine though. He hadn't been the same after his… ahem, nightly visit… with the Devil herself. Himself? Clark supposed it didn't really matter. What the two did together was their business. He just wished it didn't spill over into Constantine's usual operations as it had. The man was growing even more paranoid than normal, which was saying something for a man as cursed as him.

Green Lantern was actually the one Clark had to chide most often. He was perhaps a bit too dedicated to his work. Clark understood the sentiment and motivation. But he preferred if John focused on the present since they were requesting his attention. Clark often wondered how heaping a whole sector of responsibility onto only two Lanterns was a good idea at all.

Still, all three 'Johns' obliged him and Clark nodded, "Thank you. I realize you're all busy but when we have meetings like this, I'd prefer if you were all here with us, so to speak."

"Of course, Clark," John nodded. Despite his confirmation, Clark had a sneaking suspicion he'd just taken his ring activities mental.

He couldn't prove it though so he just sighed, "Bruce, if you would?"

Bruce nodded to him from the other side of the meeting room table, taking control of the meeting with no-nonsense as he did so well, "Today's subject is pressing. And unfortunately, rather familiar to more than a few of us in the room."

"We're going back to the Dead End with this one," Barbara — One of the two 'Bat prodigies' attending today's meeting — said sarcastically. "Rejoice."

Dick — the other 'Bat prodigy' — laughed, "I very much doubt 'rejoicing' is going to be the first thing on our minds after this meeting."

"What has Sean done now?" Barry — Flash — joked.

"What 'HASN'T' he done~?" Kara giggled.

Diana smirked slightly, "This meeting should be… enjoyable~."

"For a certain definition of the word," Constantine grumbled.

Dinah — Black Canary — just groaned, "He just keeps coming back. We'll never escape. Never…"

Oliver — her significant other and the Green Arrow — smirked, "There, there, babe. Deep breaths."

"Hrrn…" Bruce grunted a sound that could have been mistaken for resentment. Clark recognized it as mostly just frustration. He tapped away at his tablet for a moment. A filed report was flicked to the rest of the League members at the meeting, displayed on their own tablets.

Glancing around the table, Clark realized that only a few of the gathered League members hadn't met Sean yet. Just Arthur — Aquaman, John — the Green Lantern one, Oliver, J'onn, and Zatanna. The impossible bartender had a remarkably long social reach, it seemed, interacting with quite a few of Earth's most notable heroes.

Clark had even heard that the Teen Titans were Mr. Barkeep's latest frequent guests. An impressive feat considering the Titans were based in San Francisco. Shaking his head in semi-fond exasperation, Clark looked down at his tablet. And paused.

"Bruce…?" He asked leadingly.

Bruce just grunted, not answering in favor of glaring at his tablet as if he were seeing the filed report for the first time all over again.

"Wow," Oliver muttered quietly. "I didn't even know our 'classified information' system went this high."

"This… can't be right," John considered. "I don't have clearance to override the redactions."

Zatanna furrowed her brow, "Neither do I."

"Nor I," Diana added more of the same, seeming much more amused by the situation than the other two did.

"Well, that should help narrow down the subject matter, right?" Flash reasoned, half-joking. "John doesn't have clearance so it isn't alien-related. Same with Zatanna so it's not magic. And with Diana on top of you two, it's likely not divine either."

"That's not how our system works though," Oliver pointed out, chuckling slightly. "Even with how paranoid and private Bruce is, he's pretty good at sharing top clearance with team leaders like all of us. The only ones here who theoretically shouldn't have the right clearance are Dick, Barbara, and Kara."

"I'd almost say it was a mistake~…" Diana teased leadingly.

Bruce scowled — his default expression, "It's not. I purposefully created a whole new clearance level to classify this report. After this meeting, it'll be shoved in the deepest, darkest, proverbial vault we have."

Barbara shuddered in her seat, "And thank Didi for that…"

The few members who were more unfamiliar with the Dead End raised eyebrows at her unusual swear. Clark knew all too well why she was substituting Didi's name for the Lord's though. He didn't particularly agree with it — having been raised a good Christian Kansas boy by Ma and Pa — but he certainly understood it. It was hard to deny that meeting Didi was something of a religious experience. Clark could easily see why someone who was agnostic would come to swear to her name after getting a taste of Didi's Truth in the Dead End.

Zatanna straight-out gaped at Barbara in shock when she invoked the nickname of Endless Death. Constantine barked an honest laugh, typically much more irreverent when it came to higher powers — good or bad — than his magical colleague. There were exceptions, of course, especially when it came to the Endless. But he'd seen far too much to be 'faithful' in the traditional sense of the word.

"That's crazy. Wild, even," He shook his head. "I might just have to start swearing to someone I know is listening too though."

"That-…! I-…! What?!" Zatanna sputtered, her expression vivid in its sheer uncomprehending confusion.

"She won't mind," Barbara smirked wickedly. "Hell, since it's you, she might just tell you to 'call more'. She's quite fond of family and I'd bet that extends to 'lovers-in-law' too~."

Constantine flinched, "Don't bring up Luci right now… It's too soon. I'm still looking over my shoulder."

"Aww, poor, poor, John~," Diana teased. "Did that mean old Devil make it so you can't sit straight~?"

"Yes," Constantine nodded. "I'm not ashamed to admit Luci terrifies me. So hot… but so scary…"

He trailed off at that last line, shuddering as he seemed to lose himself in memories. Oliver whispered to Dinah next to him, "I feel like I'm missing something."

"So many things," Dinah replied, her voice a forced monotone. "Trust me, you don't want to know."

Bruce cut in bluntly, bringing the meeting back on topic, "John's carnal affair with the literal Devil isn't what we're here to talk about."

"I'm sorry, his what??" John asked in disbelief.

Bruce pressed on as if nothing was said but Clark saw his lips twitch minutely in amusement, "The report is going to be cleared for this meeting and this meeting alone. Even then, everything potentially harmful in a memetic and existential way will be heavily redacted. Prepare yourself."

"You're all going to need it…" Barbara muttered.

With that ominous warning, everyone at the meeting was given temporary clearance to view the report. They all glanced down to read. And they paused again.

Barry quickly scrolled through the entire report, "Uh, Bruce…? How the Hell are we supposed to get anything from this?"

Clark couldn't help but agree. Practically the only thing that was eligible from the report was the title. And even that was partially redacted. 'Sean Caine's long, long night in [REDACTED]'. The rest of the report was much worse. It was essentially just a giant block of blacked-out text with one or two words here and there that made it through untouched.

"This seems a bit excessive," Clark pointed out, very much stating the obvious.

"It's for all of our safety," Bruce grunted. "We don't enjoy the same benefits as the Dead End does. The ones who wrote this report and heard the story in person had safety nets in the form of Sean and Didi. We don't. I'm looking into it. In the meantime, we have to be sure nothing slips through."

"This… sounds bad. Really bad. Who wrote the report? Are we sure they escaped unharmed?" John worried.

"Barbara and Kara," Bruce said, nodding to the two young women. "They've been thoroughly screened. And after everything, I have a certain amount of respect for Sean's competency. Didi's was never in question."

"They're clean," J'onn said, holding his head in his hands. "I wasn't after scanning them. But half a dozen ounces of the good stuff fixed that."

"Is that why you've been less subtle about you… ahem, habits?" Clark asked as diplomatically as he could manage.

"Yup," J'onn answered without shame. "After what I was forced to see in their minds, I need it. I really fucking need it… I wrote that off as a business expense, by the way."

Bruce scowled but nodded, "Acceptable. I'll see about ordering a re-up from Ivy's shop to help further your recovery."

"Oh, fuck yeah," J'onn mumbled to himself, slumping so his head was on the table. "Almost makes it worth the pain…"

"Hehe…" Dick chuckled awkwardly. "I've never been more glad to miss story night at the Dead End."

Barbara shuddered viscerally, "Yeah, count yourself lucky, Dick. This story was… honestly terrifying. Even for Sean."

Kara nodded, "It wasn't pretty. It's for the best that this whole thing won't be spoken of again after this meeting."

"Can we at least get a brief summary of events?" John still pressed for more information.

"Even that might be too much for mortal minds to bear," Bruce warned.

"It can't be that bad, can it?" Barry asked, trying to lighten the mood slightly.

"An ancient city built atop the still writhing Blood and corpses of Eldritch Gods," Barbara said bluntly.

"Ah…" Barry grimaced. "I think I'd like to withdraw my question."

"Considering what we know about Mr. Barkeep, shouldn't all of this have taken place in another reality?" Oliver asked. "If so, is it really such a threat here?"

"We're not taking any chances," Barbara shook her head.

"Scarecrow seemed quite susceptible to the story's horror, even with the protections Sean and Didi had in place," Kara added.

"The best thing to do with a memetic hazard is to not talk about it," Constantine advised gruffly. "I'd rather prefer not having to deal with a whole other reality's Great Old Ones. The ones we have now are more than enough."

Everyone suddenly froze on the spot and turned to look at him. Constantine snorted at the shock, dread, and horror creeping onto most of their faces, "Ah, don't worry. They're contained… Mostly."

The existential dread in the room lingered for a moment before Arthur suggested, "Perhaps we should move on from this topic entirely?"

Barbara nodded emphatically in agreement, "Yeah. It happened. It's been filed. It almost certainly won't become a threat. That's all there is to say on the subject if any of you want to escape this meeting with your sanity still intact."

John frowned, "I still feel like I should know more-…"

Bruce cut him off with a growl, "Too fucking bad. Drop it."

"Uh oh," Barry muttered in the silence that followed Bruce's cursing. "B-man's pissed..."

"I can't completely blame him," Diana shook her head. "Sharing any more of this report than necessary seems unwise."

"Don't fuck with memetic hazards," Constantine agreed in his own roundabout way. "Or Eldritch gods. Or Sean and Didi. Space cop needs to learn when to not be a nark."

Clark cut in before John could snap back at… John… "Alright, next order of business. Funnily enough, this also concerns the Dead End and Sean Caine. He seems to have received… visitors. Interesting visitors. From… outside, let's say…"

"Is this about Ciri and the Edgerunners or the… other ones?" Barbara asked, punctuating her question with a humorous snort.

"Oh, Ciri has returned~?" Diana asked in return, happily perking up at that information.

"Edgerunners…?" Knowing the Dead End, Clark was almost hesitant to request more information.

"Yeah," Barbara waved, explained casually. "They're Ciri's friends from a cyberpunk dystopic future dimension or something. They tagged along when she came back."

"They're nice," Kara smiled sweetly. "They seemed to get along well with Victor since they shared the whole technological transhumanism thing in common. David's been through a lot but his partner Lucy is helping him heal. Oh, and Becca reminds me a lot of Harley."

"It's a terrifying likeness," Barbara elaborated with a shudder. "I'm not sure the world would survive the two of them joining forces."

Kara nodded solemnly in agreement, "We would all burn in the chaos of their wake. Luckily, Deathstroke is taking them under his wing so they won't be in Gotham all the time."

"Wait, wait, wait," Barry interrupted hurriedly. "Deathstroke is taking on students? Cyborg students?! And that's considered 'lucky'?!"

"Compared to the chaos Becca and Harley would get up to, I'll take whatever I can get to keep them apart as much as physically possible," Barbara deadpanned.

"They… weren't the visitors I was referring to," Clark said slowly. "But I suppose it's good to know about them. We'll start a file for the Edgerunners. Thankfully, they sound relatively mundane as far as threat levels go."

Diana chuckled wickedly at that, "You're forgetting that we already know Ciri is a space-time, dimension-hopping mage, aren't you, Clark?"

Clark paused, "… Yes. Yes, I was. Perhaps 'mundane' is not the right word for that team then… Still, the visitors I was referring to are more… worrying."

"Yes," Diana smirked. "Let's address the angel in the room."

John groaned, "Do we have to?"

Those who weren't clued in — most of the gathered members — blinked in confusion, "Huh?"

Clark sighed and elaborated, "Last week — during the same night as the story that shall go unmentioned —, an unknown entity popped into existence in low-Earth orbit and quickly made their way to Gotham. Alarms were sounded so John, Diana, and I went to greet the newcomer. When we arrived in the skies above Gotham, we were introduced to Simmy."

He pulled up the relevant report on his tablet and sent it around to everyone at the table. They all looked down, and for the third time in the meeting, paused.

"Huh," Barry 'said'. "Yeah, that's an angel."

"A very big angel," Oliver helpfully added.

"Indeed," Clark sighed again. "Fortunately, she was quite reasonable and open to communication. Which is how we found out her intentions for coming here were entirely centered around Sean Caine."

"Simply adorable," Diana chuckled. "The way she talked about Sean was just the sweetest thing. We didn't speak to her much but I can already say I'm rather fond of what I saw."

"That makes one of us," John muttered. "I'm not afraid to admit she freaked me right the fuck out."

"Simmy was — surprisingly and thankfully — peaceful," Clark continued. "She simply wanted to join Sean in the Dead End. I don't expect she'll be causing many problems there. At least… not any more than the usual Dead End fair.

"The real complication comes from her origin. She's not from our reality. And we actually already have her on record… from one of Mr. Barkeep's stories. She's his ex-wife. Just wife now, I suppose, since they've been reunited."

"I remember her!" Barry snapped. "From one of the first stories we heard from Sean, right? The Endbringer? Damn, she looks pretty good for an apocalyptic monster."

"Please don't refer to her as such, Barry," Clark requested. "For diplomacy's sake at least. To our knowledge, not only are her 'Endbringing' ways in the past, but they were also forced upon her.

"We're not trying to make an enemy of her. Or Sean Caine, more importantly. The reasoning in Sean's case should be… obvious… but Simmy herself is a terrifying telekinetic as well. In both power and control, considering she flies with her telekinesis and even 'speaks' with it. Additionally, she doesn't seem to have any trouble coming and going anywhere she pleases. She quite literally pierced through realities and dimensions because she wanted to see her husband again."

Clark said that last line in a deadpan because of just how ridiculous it was. He'd seen quite a few things during his time as a hero. But Simmy's sheer determination to see her love again still stretched his belief a bit.

"I think it's touching," Kara said.

"It is rather romantic," Oliver agreed, smirking at his significant other.

Dinah rolled her eyes at him, "Don't think you'd get that lucky with me, Buster. I love you but I can't go around casually breaking the rules of reality like some impossible people."

"Simmy was also very nice to everyone when we met," Kara added, voicing her support for the 'false' angel. "She's an… interesting person. VERY devoted to Sean. But other than him, she just seems to want to learn about the world."

"That's about what we gathered," Clark nodded. "We shouldn't have any trouble with her so long as we maintain our current course in regards to Sean and the Dead End."

"I still feel like we're too hands-off with that whole subject…" John grumbled.

"Alright," Barry smirked. "You can be the one to piss him off then. Frankly, I'd rather stay on the good side of the eternally reincarnating guy who breaks reality as casually as he breathes. Not to mention Death… Literal. Endless. Death."

Even John cringed at that, "Good point. I just feel like he should be more regulated or watched."

"It's Sean," Barbara deadpanned. "Regulating him is a job done in bad faith. We don't have any right to try and control him. I wouldn't want to even if we did. As ridiculous as he is, I'm of the opinion that he's a relatively good influence on the world around him."

Bruce nodded firmly once, "You won't interfere, Green Lantern. He's distinctly out of your jurisdiction."

"Now, that's just not true!" John argued. "The whole sector is my responsibility! And we already know he's not limiting himself to actions on Earth alone!"

"Then you won't interfere because you have a modicum of sense in that head of yours," Bruce shot back with a scowl. "Drop. It."

The two heroes had a brief, tense staredown. John backed down first, grumbling, "Fine… The Guardians won't be happy about this. They're already in shambles…"

"Good," Bruce grunted. "They can rot in the center of the universe for all I care. The rest of us actually have to deal with reality."

Barbara smirked slightly in the lull of conversation that followed, "You know, Simmy wasn't the only visitor Sean received that night…"

"Yeah," Kara nodded slowly. "Ophis…"

"The Infinite Dragon God," Barbara finished for her.

"Well, that's a reassuring title," Barry drawled sarcastically to hide his worry.

"It's… worse in person," Kara admitted.

"Ophis is just a little bit terrifying," Barbara added.

"Hnn… Report?" Bruce growled.

"According to Sean, she's the literal embodiment of Infinity," Kara said. "Not exactly like Didi and the Endless. But close enough that she could be put into that same 'cosmic being' ballpark."

"What'd you see when she stepped through reality into the Dead End?" Barbara asked Kara curiously.

Kara shuddered slightly, "Something inhuman. And adorable… Everything. And nothing. Infinite Silence."

"Just great," Constantine grunted. "Add another being to the top tier of reality, why don't you, Barkeep?"

"Thankfully, her motivations are even more simple than Simmy's," Barbara consoled. "All she seems to care about are Sean's sweets and her Silence. Whatever we do, I'd recommend 'leave her alone' as our top priority."

"Noted," Bruce nodded. "Anything else happen that night that you've 'conveniently' left out of your reports, Barbara?"

"Nothing much," Barbara casually shrugged. "Just a magic lesson that left the mages in the bar reeling and practically unresponsive. Oh, and Sean freeing the first Avatar of Magic and ringing in a new Age of Magic as a bonus…"

Zatanna startled in her seat, "THAT'S what that was?!"

"Damn~…" Constantine let out a low whistle. "Hecate's finally free?

The others looked at them in confusion and Zatanna elaborated, "Magic has been all up in sorts these past few days. Completely unlike anything I've ever seen. Some of my spells aren't working. Others are working too well. Everyone in existence must have felt it to some degree. It's easily the most significant universal event of our lifetimes."

"Nah, even that's understating it," Constantine laughed darkly. "Hell's in disarray. As is Heaven. The Sphere of Gods — the entire realm — is running around like a chicken with its head cut off. I swear I even felt the dark half of reality poking through the barrier there once or twice. Magic is… happy. It's the damnedest thing."

"Oh, holy shit," John muttered. "That's what the Guardians are freaking the fuck out about."

"They feckin' should be!" Constantine barked harshly. "Bastards think they know everything. Think they've hidden their past. Magic remembers. It knows they're partially responsible for the shitty state it was in. And Magic is nothing if not petty…"

The others looked at him curiously and John stared in horror, "What… do you mean…?"

"Don't know your bosses' history, eh, space nark?" Constantine grinned viciously. "The Guardians are far from the paragons of 'Good' they portray themselves as. Ya wouldn't have heard of the Starheart, I presume?"

At John's shake of the head, Constantine continued, "Your bastard bosses thought it was a bright idea to gather up all of the universe's stray magical energies and lock them up in the heart of a star at some point in the distance past."

"Feckin' stupid," Constantine spat. "Bastards likely stunted the whole of existence with that move. The universe might just be twice the size if they hadn't. Or something even more important. We'll never know 'cause they thought themselves smart enough to knee-cap a damned aspect of existence!"

"It's a rather significant event in Magic's history," Zatanna nodded sadly. "Only a few fortunate mages truly know about it but the creation of the Starheart did handicap Magic for a long, long time. I don't think it's possible to fully discern or comprehend the effects it had on reality. Magic is essential. And a good fraction of its power was rounded up-…"

"Taken out back and shot in the head," Constantine interrupted gruffly.

"Yes, that," Zatanna agreed dryly. "But now with a new Age of Magic… Who knows what will happen to the Starheart? It might be fully released like a sudden tsunami of old magic. It might gain a life and sapience of its own. It might even stay exactly where it is and begin plotting its revenge on the ones who locked it up."

"It might not have to," Barbara noted. "Sean is very fond of Magic. The concept and the… disparate entity? Whatever you would call it. As he tells it, he's connected to Magic on an existential level. I doubt he'll take kindly to anyone abusing it, even in the distant past."

John gaped in horror, "I have to warn-…!"

"Don't," Diana cut him off, her voice stern and solid as enchanted steel. "They have dug their graves. It is far past time these Guardians faced the consequences of their actions. Magic's retribution is long overdue."

She glared John down until he conceded her point. It didn't take him long to look away and sink back into his seat, grumbling, "Fine… Nobody likes the Guardians, it seems… Makin' it out like we're the bad guys or something…"

"It kinda sounds like you are," Barry jabbed with a joking smirk on his face.

"Speaking of digging graves…" Kara laughed awkwardly, hating to be the bearer of bad news for her older friend. "Uh, the Olympians might have come looking for Hecate after Sean freed her and offered her sanctuary in the Dead End… Which may have then resulted in Sean putting the fear of god into the demigod they sent and not-quite declaring war on Olympus…"

Diana simply sighed at that news, "Was it deserved?"

"Totally," Barbara nodded. "The demigod was awful. Wouldn't take no for an answer and he was just straight-up rude to several of Sean's employees. Sean didn't even hurt him. Just scared the fight out of him and sent him on an express trip back to Olympus."

"Of course, Zeus then responded…" Barbara continued. "By trying to vaporize the Dead End and all of us inside it."

Bruce growled with thunder on his brow at that casual statement, "HE WHAT…?"

Barry winced — as did most of the others —, "Jeez, man. That's entirely out of pocket."

"Fucking Zeus…" Diana sighed again and stood up from her seat. "Excuse me, all. I believe I must go apologize for my idiot divines right about now."