Gacha Gacha Hero

“There are a lot of people out there.” Eins whined while looking out of the remains of the driving window.

“What about the Guard?” Ave asked.

“There’s a woman helping him get back up.”

“I don’t want to deal with this right now.” Tasha massaged her own neck.

“It’s all right.” Luke comforted her. “We’ll turn ourselves in and tell them that we were attacked by monsters.”

“Uuugh.” Tasha moaned.

“We’re not going to do any of that.” Ash exclaimed.

“Is anyone inside of there!” Someone yelled from outside the carriage.

“Crap. He’s up.” Eins informed the others. “What should we do?”

“Come out of that carriage!”

“Should we leave the carriage?”

“No?” Ash said.

“Yes?” Tasha asked.

“We have to do something. We’re right in the middle of the road.” Ave looked around.

Tasha cleared her throat. “Okay. You three-”

“Four.” Luke corrected as he pet Eins.

“Right. You four stay in here. I’ll go out there and try to explain things.”

Tasha climbed out of the vehicle.

*Clatter*Clunk*

Odds and ends tumbled out of the doorway after her.

Tasha faced the Gate Guard. He was red in the face and brushing stray bits of straw off of his armor. Tasha smoothed back her hair. She put on her best smile.

#

“I told you. I’m a traveling trader. I trade things.”

Tasha adjusted one of her barrettes. She was sweating under the stares of so many tourists.

“What does that mean?” The Stalwart Gate Guard asked again.

“It means I travel between towns exchanging goods through bartering.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.” The Guard crossed his arms.

“Are you saying that you travel to different towns to do this?” The Charmed Adjuster asked.

“That’s right.” Tasha nodded.

The Gate Guard sneered. “That sounds suspicious. Why wouldn’t you summon the items yourself? Are you a criminal? Are you wanted in another town? Is that why you have a made-up job?”

#

Ash peeked out the window. “This isn’t going well. We need to get out of the road. Let’s get out there.”

“What if they recognise me?” Luke questioned.

“Don’t worry, they won’t even look at you. Now grab Eins, follow me, and do what I say.”

#

Tasha bit her lip. She took a deep breath.

“I’m trying to tell you we were attacked by a-”

“A tornado!” Ash interjected. He hopped out of the carriage into the street. Ash carefully corrected his concealing curtain covering.

“A what?” The Stalwart Gate Guard turned to question the new face.

“A rogue storm. A giant swirling vortex of wind.” Ash added.

“Hmmm…” The watching tourists murmured.

“I know what a tornado is.” The Gate Guard glowered.

“Then you know how powerful they are. They can uproot trees and toss boulders. We were on our way here when a rogue storm dropped one right on top of us. Look at me.” Ash gestured to his wrap. “It sucked the clothes right off of my body.”

“Oooh…” The tourists observed.

Ash pointed at the carriage. “Look at all of the damage that it did to our carriage. Tore the door clean off. Isn’t that right Tasha?”

“Uuuh…” Tasha wavered.

“That’s right.” Ash answered himself. “And look at my poor brother.” He put a hand on Luke’s shoulder. “He’s so traumatized that he can only speak in ventriloquism. Isn’t that right brother.” Ash stared pointedly at Eins as the dog sat in Luke’s arms.

Eins whined. “Uh… that’s right? It was… terrifying!”

“That’s incredible.” The Charmed Adjuster exclaimed.

“I didn’t even see his lips move.” The Stalwart Gate Guard stared.

“Aaah…” The crowd of tourists gasped.

“Please sir. You have to let us in. I don’t want to even imagine what might happen if another tornado suddenly appeared with all of these people waiting outside the gate.” Ash quickly winked at Eins.

The Gate Guard frowned. “I don’t know. It all sounds so… unbelievable…”

Eins spoke up. “Did you know that a water spout is capable of sucking seawater almost 50 kilometers into the air?” The canine grinned.

“What?” The Gate Guard inquired.

The Charmed Adjuster pushed her glasses up her nose. “I think he’s right. I’ve heard that before.”

The Gate Guard looked at her. “Are you sure?”

Ash slipped to the back of the group. He concentrated.

*pop*

*pop*

*pop*

*Splat*

The Gate Guard looked around. “What was-”

*Splat*

Something soft and wet hit the road in front of him. He looked down at the sticky mess.

“Is that a…?”

“I think that’s a trout.” The Adjuster finished.

*Splat*Splat*Shunk*

More fish rained down. A sickly cod impaled itself on the Stalwart Gate Guard’s spear.

“Oh no… it’s happening… again…!” Tasha seized the moment.

“Eeeh!” The tourists cried out in terror.

“Can a tornado really appear out of nowhere like that?” The Gate Guard tightened his grip on his spear.

The Charmed Adjuster looked at the clear blue sky overhead. “For a rogue storm to create a vortex so suddenly is highly improbable…”

*Splat*

She looked at the fish next to her. “But, not statistically… impossible.”

“Blast it all!” The Gate Guard bellowed. “Everyone inside! There is a chance of extreme weather. All tourists grab your children and your belongings and head inside the city gates!”

Tasha nodded. “Right away sir. Grab the carriage and start pushing. Let’s go, go, go.”

Tourists and travelers ran towards the town gate as a few more fish splatted into the streets behind them.

The Charmed Adjuster collected her papers. She watched the Gate Guard herding people inside. “So commanding.” she swooned.