NOVEL NEXT Pull 19
Belbuk leaned against the doorframe leading into the kitchen of her Cabin. Luke and Ash stood against the far wall with their crosses held protectively in front of their bodies.
*Stomp*Stomp*Stomp*
The goose monster waddled up to the porch of the Cabin. Its long neck twisted in through the front door. The creature pulled its wings in tight then *Heaved* its bulk at the opening.
Luke lowered his stick. “I don’t know if he’s going to fit…”
With a creaking *Shudder* the goose pushed into the room. A cloud of feathers exploded filling the living room with white down. Luke and Ash coughed.
The goose shook itself and stretched its wings. Boxes, benches, and baskets were tossed in every direction.
“It is good to be back.” The goose said with a deep, breathy voice.
“Make yourself at home Deus.” Belbuk smarmed. “These kids said a monster died in the woods. I thought it might have been you.”
“Nonsense.” Deus trumpeted. “I was investigating the forest. I sensed something, uncanny. But I became disoriented in the storm. My beautifuh wings covered with mud.” The goose spread a wing. Cups and dishes were scattered off the top of the nearby table. “I returned to you. I knew you wouhd provide your magnate with assistance.”
“You know this creature.” Luke asked.
“Yeeeah…” Belbuk trailed off.
“What, are, you?” Ash poked the creature with the handle of his stick.
“I am…” The goose threw back its head. “Ghorious.”
The creature puffed out the feathers of its body.
*Cricket*Cricket*
“You may address me as Deus.” The goose spoke.
“Are you a monster?” Ash asked.
“Nonsense.” Deus chuckled.
“Yes.” Belbuk said flatly.
“Devoted you wound me.” Deus dramatically hid its face with a wing.
There was a *Patter* of paws on the stairs.
“What is going on? What were those explosions?” Eins stopped in its tracks on the staircase. “I mean. Bark!”
“Eins. My ohd compatriot. How have you been?” Deus turned its head to the dog.
“Deus? What in the world are you doing here? Dammit. I mean bark bark!” Eins yelped.
“You can tell your dog to swallow its spittle. I always knew it was a spirit.” Belbuk said.
“You knew? But you made me sleep on the floor. If you knew why did you make me eat out of a dog bowl on the ground?” Eins asked with outrage on its little doggy face.
Belbook absently chewed the end of her wax sprig.
“Because it was funny.”
#
*Gobble*Gobble*Gobble*
Deus was unrepentantly devouring a bucket of corn. Seriously. Face down. Beak in the bottom of the bucket. Corn kernels flying through the air. Pure devastation.
“So it’s not a Shadowbeast?” Luke asked from across the table.
Luke, Ash, Eins, and Belbuk were seated at the living room table. Because of Deus’ size the table was pushed all the way against the far wall.
“No. But it is a monster.” Belbuk sat back on her stool. “Deus is a spirit. Like your dog. It’s a creature made of mana instead of flesh and bone.”
*Gobble*Gobble*Gobble*
They all watched the goose shovel more corn into its beak.
“Well that’s not entirely accurate. They have a physical form but they use mana to sustain themselves in our world.” Belbuk added. “Think of them like ghosts. Clever ghosts that managed to find a way to turn themselves into real people.”
“Come now Behbuk you are simphifying things.” Deus sprayed corn all over the table. “We are divine beings. We protect your worhd and bring you wisdom from the heavens.” Deus spread its wings protectively over the table.
Then the goose jammed its head back into the bucket.
*Gobble*Gobble*Gobble*
“What is all of this noise that you’re making down here?” Ave, wrapped in a quilt, swung her body over the edge of the staircase so she could look down into the living room. Her greasy hair hung upside down in front of her face.
“Oh hey, there’s a goose.” She observed.
“Turns out Eins isn’t a god. He’s just a weird ghost dog.” Ash called up to her.
“I never said I was a god.” Eins retorted.
“Yes you did. You said you were a god.” Ash accused Eins.
“No. I said that you may worship me like a god. Not that I was a god.” Eins replied.
Luke mused.
#
“So how do we use these?” Ash asked.
Luke and Ash were standing in the front yard. Each of them were holding sets of matching metal bottles in their hands.
Deus stood in the yard impatiently ruffling its feathers.
Belbuk waited on the porch. “Unscrew the top of the reactive container then add it to the compression chamber. That will trigger the alchemical reaction.” she explained.
Luke and Ash looked at each other. They looked back at Belbuk.
“Put the small bottle in the big bottle, shake it, then douse Deus with the foam.” Belbuk explained again.
Ash looked at the bottles. “These aren’t going to dissolve him, or us, are they?”
“No, they're actually a mild detergent this time. Don’t worry so much.” Belbuk said. “Think of it as another alchemy lesson.”
Ash and Luke looked down the hill at the smoking crater in the front yard.
“Okay…” Luke worried.
Luke and Ash followed Belbuk’s directions. They filled the larger bottles with the contents of the smaller ones. There was a *Gurgle* from inside the bottles. A white foam sprayed from the neck of the bottles into the air.
“Whoa!” Luke gasped in surprise. “There’s so much.”
“It’s coming out so fast.” Ash shook the bottle with both hands.
“Don’t just spray it all over the place. You’re making a mess.” Belbuk crossed her arms. *Sigh* “Boys.”
Luke and Ash turned their spray bottles on Deus. The goose spread its wings. The giant bird was saturated with white foam.
Ave came out of the cabin still wrapped in a quilt. She sat down on the porch next to Belbuk. Eins padded out after her and jumped up into her lap.
Ave scratched Eins. “So these are spirit creatures.”
“You don’t seem surprised.” Belbuk observed.
“The Capital is a big place. There were always legends. Soldiers in the barracks telling each other stories of monsters, demons, and magic.” Ave looked down at Eins. “I’m beginning to wonder how much of it was really true.”
“More than you’d hope, less than you’d think.” Belbuk instinctively rubbed the stump of the missing finger on her hand.
Belbuk watched Ash and Luke soap up a goose. “Did those pads work out for you?” she asked.
“I didn’t need them yet.”
“Huh?”
“I won’t need them until tomorrow.”
Belbuk sniffed. “You know exactly when it’s going to start?”
“That’s right. One hour. Just after sunrise. Every time, like clockwork.”
“Wow. Now I really hate young people.” Belbuk spit out a snot ball into the yard.
“That reminds me. Eins?” Ave picked up the dog so that it was facing her. “Are you a boy or a girl?”
“What do you mean?” The dog tilted its head at her.
“When you were sleeping on top of me I took a casual look at your anatomy. I’ve seen your anus, but you don’t seem to have any sexual organs.” Ave held the dog up for examination.
“Spirits don’t have any.” Belbuk picked a clinging feather off of her shoulder. “None of them do.” She flicked the feather into the yard.
“No. Why would I? I’ve seen those floppy bits you mortals are so proud of. No thank you.” Eins shook its head.
“So the gods don’t have a sex? At all?” Ave asked.
Eins tapped its chin in contemplation. “There are some that could if they wanted to. But why bother? It requires a lot of energy to maintain our physical forms. Making extra organs that we couldn’t use would be unnecessary. Who wants to deal with that kind of aggravation?”
“Your doggy god has the right idea. Some days I feel like hanging my vagina up on a clothesline and leaving it out in the rain.” Belbuk chuckled.
#
Ash and Luke’s bottles finished spurting out a few last drops of foam.
“Okay. He’s soaked. What now?” Luke called back to the Cabin.
Belbuk kicked a bucket of water next to her on the porch. “Grab some rags and some water. You’ve got to rinse the foam off now.”
“More alchemy training?” Luke questioned.
“More alchemy training.” Belbuk nodded. “Everyone has to start somewhere.”
Ash stomped up the porch to fetch the water.
“This is so stupid. Now we’re goose polishers.” he said.
The boys walked back down next to Deus.
“Let’s get this over with.” Ash said.
“Here. Let me help.” Deus raised its wings into the air. With a tremendous downstroke the goose created an *Airblast*. Foam droplets shot off in every direction splattering all over Ash and Luke.
“That shouhd assist you.” Deus spoke with pride. It raised one of its paws into the air and spread its toes. “Make sure you rinse between the digits won’t you.”
#
After plenty of scrubbing Deus was finally clean.
The goose raised its head and pranced back and forth across the front yard.
“Fine work my young genthemen. Observe.” The goose spread its wings in full display. “Am I not even more ghorious than I was before?”
“You’re something alright.” Ash grumbled.
“Now then, give me a chance to express my gratitude.” The giant bird lowered its head and stretched out its neck.
“Hork, hork, hooorrrkkk…” Deus made a serious of retching noises. The muscles of its throat throbbed with exertion. “Hohd out your hands… Hooork… Here it comes!”
Ash and Luke gingerly held out their hands.
“HHHooorrrKKK!”
Deus spit directly into their outstretched palms.
“There you are.” The goose said in satisfaction.
“What is this?” Ash held up the slimy object. “Is this a chess piece?”
“I think I got a belt buckle.” Luke said.
Deus nodded. “Keep the change.”