13. Bumbleboop
Zoe went downstairs and found Joe preparing his morning meals. The pots and pans set up just the way he liked, with piles of plates sitting on the counter next to him. Eggs cracking onto the stove and sizzling away, the smell of oil wafting to her nose.
“Good morning Joe.” She said.
“Morning, Zoe.”
“I’m thinking today I’ll start working on winter’s master, just to make sure I’m not a day or two off of when winter really starts.”
“You should still have three days, you know. Can stick around in a comfortable bed a while longer, get things worked out.”
“Mm, yeah. But what if the system tracks it differently or something and it starts today or tomorrow this year for some reason?” Zoe asked.
Joe snorted, “I’d be surprised.”
“Well it doesn’t hurt anyway, what’s another couple of days if I’ve gotta last a few months anyway. Should be fun exploring the city a bit for once too.” Zoe said.
“Well I won’t stop you.” He said, looking at her bundle of belongings loosely wrapped in her clothes. “Do you want a bag for your stuff?” He asked.
“That would be nice, actually.” She said.
Joe finished up the dishes he was working on as Zoe watched, and then reached into a cupboard to grab a small bag that he handed to her.
“It’s not a storage item but it should hold your stuff. You could have the big one if you want too but it’s a bit more unwieldy.” He said.
“Thanks, Joe.” Zoe took the bag and stuffed everything she had in it. With the books resting on top, it all fit with even a little bit of room to spare.
“Yeah, stay safe out there Zoe. You’re always welcome back here if you need somewhere to stay.” He continued cooking over the stove, sweat beginning to bead down his brow from the heat.
“I really appreciate what you’ve done, Joe. I’ll definitely be back every now and then to say hi. Apparently I can come inside for a bit but the book didn’t specify how long, so I’m going to avoid it too much.” Zoe said.
“Maybe we can go for a walk sometime then, I’ll show you some places around town. I’ve got some chores to do in a few days before winter starts if you’re around.” Joe said.
“I should be, thanks Joe.” Zoe answered, leaving the kitchen.
She looked around for Rizick for a moment, but guessed he was either still with Isla or out on his own grand adventures. Zoe figured she could stop by later and say goodbyes, since he was leaving soon.
Zoe stepped out of the inn, and something about it felt more final. A part of her recognizing the commitment she was making, the months ahead of her spent outdoors.
She wandered through town towards a different area than the previous job board she found, hoping to build a rudimentary mental map of the town. It didn’t take long before she found another tavern rife with activity. Raucous laughter and music resounding as the patrons drank and enjoyed themselves.
She walked in and looked for a board with postings on it, which she found just off to the wall near the entrance. Many of the jobs were the same as the ones she saw at the last place. She wondered what happened if somebody from two places took the same job? And for that matter, how did Liz mark that he didn’t need the job anymore after she finished it?
The majority of the jobs were for catering and general security, jobs she didn’t think herself capable of. As she looked through, she noticed most postings had a different coloured shape on it, just under the pin. Squares, circles, stars and a slash. Most were white, a handful of the security jobs had a gold slash and there were a few catering jobs with brown squares.
Payment, probably. Brown for copper, white for silver and yellow for gold Zoe thought. The slash she figured meant a single coin. She felt a bit embarrassed she missed it last time, showing up to a job with an agreed upon price just to try and haggle for no reason.
She kept looking through the postings until she stumbled on one that interested her. It paid a silver circle and didn’t require a storage item from what she could see. Somebody needed a guinea pig to test their poisons on.
A little terrifying, but they wouldn’t just kill her. Probably. That would be illegal, she hoped. This was over the board poison testing with very good pay. A little scary, but she could at least check it out.
She ripped the posting off the blue pin it was hanging from and checked the address. Occ’s Tist on Jorna avenue. Instead of wandering aimless, Zoe walked up to the bar to ask for some directions.
“Hello, do you know where Jorna avenue is?" She asked the tall, lanky man with spiked brown hair who was manning the bar.
The man thought for a moment, his hand resting on his chin. “Yes I do. Head down the road until you reach Gila and take a right then carry on for a while and you should reach Jorna. Think it’s maybe oh, twenty minute walk from here?”
“Thanks!" Zoe waved and turned.
“Anytime!” The man waved back.
She followed the man’s instructions, walking down the streets until she found herself at an intersection of Gila and Jorna. She realized she never asked which way Occ’s Tist was, so she turned left and hoped. She walked for another thirty minutes, identifying all the buildings as she went until she got to a cul-de-sac at the end of the street and had to turn around.
It was another fifty minutes, almost at the complete opposite end of the street by the time she found Occ’s Tist. It was a black stone building, with stained glass windows and an ornate carved wooden door. She opened it and entered.
Inside was an empty room with a few chairs set up and a desk at the end. There were no lights, but the room was still well lit with not a shadow in sight. Sitting at a desk towards the end was a woman with short black hair and heavy bags under her eyes. She had a bowl full of various powders that she was measuring into vials.
Sitting on one of the chairs was a man in a comfortable looking green sweater and black pants, his head leaning on his shoulder as he snored.
The woman sitting at the desk looked up as Zoe entered. “Hello, can I help you?” She asked.
“Yes, I’m here to help test poisons, I guess?” Zoe said, walking up to the desk.
“Ah good good, I was worried nobody would show up today. Take a seat, I’ll be finished up here any moment and then we can get started.” She said, returning to her powders.
“Okay, sure thing.” Zoe said, grabbing a chair and sitting down.
A few minutes passed as Zoe sat and watched the woman mix up her potions. And then a few more minutes passed, and Zoe looked at the man sleeping in one of the chairs. She wondered if he was here to test poisons too, feeling a little smug that she didn’t have to wait as long as he seemed to have.
The woman put the vials she was working on away, and Zoe adjusted her posture in the chair. Her anxiety raising. She was going to get poisoned for money. Was it really so different from signing up to test some medicines, though? This was fine.
Zoe watched as the woman pulled out a mortar and pestle, along with some more vials and started crushing various rocks into powders, mixing the dust into vials.
“Umm, excuse me. How long is this going to take?” Zoe asked.
“Oh I’ll be done any moment now, don’t worry!” The woman said, a cheerful smile decorating her face.
“Right. Any moment. Okay.” Zoe muttered.
A few hours passed, as the woman continued crushing up different stones, plants and things Zoe couldn’t identify, mixing them into vials and putting them away. Every time she’d put the vials away, Zoe’s heartbeat would raise, her anxiety peaking at the thought of what she was going to do. And every time, she was left to wait for longer.
Until one time, the woman stood up and stretched.
“Alright, thanks for waiting you two. We can get started now.” She said, grabbing some of the vials she had been working on and placing them on the desk.
“Excuse me sir?” She raised her voice. The man stirred awake.
“Hmm? Yes. Oh, right. Are you finally done?” He asked.
“Yes yes, it was only but a moment! We’ll be getting started now if that’s alright with you.” She said, stepping in front of the desk.
Her long black dress draped behind her on the floor as she walked, the clacking of her black shoes on the stone floor echoing through the empty building.
“Sure, yeah whatever. Just let me know when I need to do something.” The man said, leaning his head back on his shoulder.
“Good, good. My name is Lorelei and today I will be studying the effects of some poisons I have created. Before we begin, young lady, I have a few questions for you.” Lorelei said, her eyes wandering to above Zoe’s head.
“Only level eight, lovely. It’s rare I get to test on somebody so low level. Most parents refuse to let their children be poisoned no matter how safe I tell them it is.” She scoffed.
“First off, I need to know your current health and vitality, your poison resistance level as well as any other skills you might have that would influence poisons.” She said, leaning against the desk.
“Okay, I have twenty vitality and two hundred health, and my poison resistance is at uhh,” Zoe focused on seeing her resistances.
Resistances:
- Mental (7)
- Poison (2)
“My poison resistance is at level two and I shouldn’t have anything else that would influence poison.” Zoe said.
“Good, good. Now I’m not some scrooge who will make you sign a contract, but I need to know you’re being honest with me. If you’re lying you may die. I’m not saying that you’re lying, but if you are and you don’t feel comfortable being truthful you should find another job to do. This will be entirely safe if we’re all honest but if one thing goes wrong it could get out of hand very quickly.”
“Okay, yeah. I’m okay with that. I’m not lying about anything.” Zoe said as she felt her heartbeat rising to uncomfortable levels.
“Lovely. Before we begin, I want to explain the process to assuage any fears you may have. I will provide you with a poison along with an antidote to consume and explain what effect the poison should have. You may choose to drink it or not. After you consume the poison you should immediately consume the antidote as well.
“Now, all of the antidotes should work. But as an extra safety precaution, when you take the antidote and get the notification that your poison is cured please immediately say bumbleboop. I know it sounds silly, but it is very important that you do this. If you do not say bumbleboop, Kharn here will heal you and we will end the testing there to prevent further mishap.
“After you say bumbleboop, I will have a series of questions. If you are able and willing to answer all of them, I will pay you a silver coin. I have twenty potions for somebody at your level and vitality to help me test today so should everything go well you could make up to two silver circles today. Does that all make sense?” She explained.
“Yeah, that all makes sense.” Zoe responded.
“Good, now when I give you a poison, what are you to do?” The woman asked.
“I drink the poison, then the antidote and if the antidote works I say bumbleboop.” Zoe said.
“Great. Before we begin, I have a test poison here. This is a known poison so I won’t need any information from you. It should be almost entirely harmless and deal one damage every hour, but we can get a feel for the process. The one marked with a skull will be the poison, and the other is the antidote.” She handed Zoe two vials.
Zoe drank the two vials in sequence, first the poison and then the antidote.
*DING* You have been poisoned. -1 hp/hr for one hour.
*DING* You have been cured of poison.
“Bumbleboop,” Zoe said, blushing.
“Good, great. Most people don’t get the bumbleboop on the first try!” Lorelei pulled out a clipboard and a pen.
“At this point, I would ask you some questions about the poison. How much damage was it doing, what debilitating effects did it have, and so on. However, I know this poison should deal one damage every hour, so we can move on if you’re comfortable with the process.” The woman said.
“Yes, I think I am.” Zoe responded.
“Good, great” Lorelei said, setting twenty pairs of vials on the desk and smiling.