Chapter 18: Sylphy's diary
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It had been a few weeks since I last saw him, since the moment I realized the person I met that day was actually him. Rudeus. Rudy.
I knew this day would come eventually. The day I'd have to face him again, properly this time, and talk about everything that happened. It wasn't something I could ignore forever, even though part of me really wanted to.
I could never forget the way he had lied to me, hiding behind a false identity just to make a fool of me.
But even with all that anger, I was also… confused. And hurt. Why had he done it? Was it just to hurt me? Or was there more to it?
I asked him that question and his answer still lingered in my mind. His answer still stuck in my head, even though I tried not to think about it.
"It's because I thought it would be funny," he said, his voice kind of quiet but not really apologetic. "That's just the kind of person I am. Disgusting, isn't it?"
It hurt to hear that. At that moment, I wanted to walk away and never see him again. Friends weren't supposed to do things like that. To hurt you for fun, treat your feelings like they were part of some joke.
But before I could storm off, he said something that made me stop in my tracks.
"Still," he said, his voice softer now, "I didn't want to leave you in trouble back then. So it's not like the whole 'I just did it for fun' story really fits, does it? The truth is I wanted to help you while having a little fun. Does that make it forgivable?"
His words were so confusing. I didn't know how to respond, but something in me just snapped. "It's wrong! It's absolutely wrong!"
I thought he'd argue back, or maybe even laugh at me again, but instead, he agreed.
"You're right," he said calmly. He didn't sound defensive, or even upset. He accepted my accusations. "It is wrong. I won't argue with that."
Those words hung heavy between us, as if he truly meant them, yet something in his demeanor suggested he didn't intend to wallow in regret. It was as though he'd accepted his nature and simply wanted me to understand it.
And honestly? That made me even more frustrated. He was such a puzzle. Mischievous and honest all at once, like he enjoyed messing with me but didn't mean it in a bad way. How was I supposed to figure him out?
I didn't move as he turned to leave, walking away at his usual slow pace like he had all the time in the world. My chest felt tight, and I hated how my feet stayed rooted, even as the space between us grew bigger and bigger.
"—wait!" the word burst out of me before I even realized what I was doing. My voice cracked a little, and I felt my cheeks flush in embarrassment.
He stopped, turning just enough to look back at me. His expression was unreadable, but there was a flicker of curiosity in his eyes.
I swallowed, trying to keep my voice steady. "I'll forgive you, but only if…" I paused, suddenly feeling ridiculous for what I was about to say. My hands fidgeted with the hem of my sleeve, but I forced the words out anyway. "Only if you teach me how to do magic. And then—and I'll make sure you stop acting like… like this!"
For a moment, he just stared at me. I thought maybe I'd said something stupid, but then his head tilted slightly like he was trying to figure me out.
"Why would you want to learn?"
The question caught me off guard. Why did I want to learn? I hesitated, thinking back to that moment when he'd used magic.
"I don't know…" I started, feeling a little silly now that I had to explain. My hands balled into fists as I tried to find the right words. "Back then, when you used magic, it felt like… like the air was alive. It was warm, and… I don't know, it felt nice." My voice got quieter as I spoke, and by the end of it, I was staring at the ground, my face burning. "I just… I want to feel that again."
When I finally dared to look up, I saw something strange in his expression. He wasn't laughing at me or smirking like he usually did. Instead, he just… smiled. Not in a teasing way, either. It seemed softer. Like he actually understood me.
"That's a good reason," he said after a moment, his voice lighter than before. "Magic is truly precious. For you and me as well, it's wonder.
I blinked, unsure if he was being serious or just messing with me. "So… does that mean you'll teach me?"
He shrugged, the familiar grin creeping back onto his face. "Sure. But don't think you'll be able to change me."
I pouted, crossing my arms. "W-we'll see about that."
His grin eased into something more smug. Then he turned back toward the path ahead, waving a hand for me to follow.
"Come on, Sylphy," he said over his shoulder. "Let's get moving. I've got some things to do first, and then we'll get started. Consider this your first lesson: keeping up with me."
I stood there for a second, processing his words, before I hurried after him, my heart racing for reasons I didn't quite understand.
First, he made me get on this scary creature he called Emrys. I knew it was just a horse and not some monster but they always used to terrify me. They were so large. And this one? It had these sharp, piercing eyes that seemed to burn right through me like it could see all my fears. My legs felt wobbly just looking at it, and I thought I was going to melt like a snowflake if it kept staring at me.
"Come on, Sylphy, it won't bite," Rudy said, his voice full of amusement. He made it sound so easy like I was silly for hesitating.
I clambered up as carefully as I could, gripping the saddle like my life depended on it. My heart was racing, and not in a fun way. Every step the horse took felt like we were a hundred feet in the air.
After what felt like forever, we reached the other side of the village. Rudy slid off the horse with that same relaxed ease he always had, while I awkwardly scrambled down, my knees wobbling as they touched the ground.
There, he started chatting with an old man who looked like he had lived in the village his whole life but I never saw him before. I didn't catch his name because Rudy didn't bother introducing us but they talked for a while. I stayed back, unsure of what to do, fidgeting under the weight of Emrys' still judgmental gaze. He hadn't stopped staring at me, and I was starting to think it might actually be plotting something.
When Rudy finally waved me over, I followed without a word, throwing one last nervous glance at Emrys as we left.
We ended up near the forest, just outside the village. Several thick logs were lying around, neatly stacked like someone had been preparing firewood. I tilted my head, curious but also a little nervous about what Rudy had planned.
"Your first lesson," Rudy said, gesturing to the logs with a wide grin, "is to cut these into pieces using Wind Magic."
I blinked at him. "What? I—I've never used magic before!"
He didn't seem fazed at all by my protest. Instead, he crouched beside one of the logs, lightly tracing a hand over its surface like he was showing off. "That's fine. I'll teach you. It's not that hard."
He went on to explain how to create wind by focusing on mana and channeling it. His explanation wasn't super detailed, but it sounded so simple when he said it like it was as easy as breathing. Then, with a quick motion, he flicked his wrist and sent a sharp gust of wind slicing cleanly through the log.
"See?" he said, standing up and dusting his hands. "Now you try."
How do I start?
I stared at the neatly split log, then back at him, my hands already starting to sweat. I wasn't sure I could do it—no, I was sure I couldn't do it. But Rudy just stood there, watching me expectantly, like he had no doubt I'd figure it out.
So I tried.
At first, nothing happened. My hands shook as I struggled to focus, and I could feel Rudy's eyes on me, making me even more nervous. But then, after what felt like an eternity, something clicked in place. The something in the air felt right to me. A small gust of wind shot from my hand, weak but steady, and I aimed it at the log.
To my surprise, it worked. The log split, not as cleanly as Rudy's, but enough to count. I stared at the pieces in disbelief, my heart pounding.
"Whoa," Rudy said, leaning closer to inspect my work. "Great job, Sylphy."
His praise made my cheeks heat up, and I ducked my head, feeling both proud and shy. "N-no… I just… tried my best."
He smiled in satisfaction, "Well, your best is impressive."
After that, Rudy walked me back home. Thankfully, only Mom was there. If Dad had been around, I would've had to come up with some awkward explanation about why Rudy was with me. I could already imagine Dad puffing out his chest, asking a million questions in that overly protective way of his.
But honestly? Mom's smug grin was almost worse.
She stood by the doorway, arms crossed, looking between the two of us like she already knew something I didn't. Her smile wasn't big, but it had that certain look, the kind that made me want to melt into the floor and disappear.
"Well, look who decided to stop by," she said lightly, her voice dripping with amusement.
I stammered something about Rudy just "helping with magic practice" and practically bolted to my room before she could say another word. Even from behind my door, I could hear her soft laugh, and my cheeks only burned more.
Oh god, I left Rudy with Mom!
Once I was safely in my room, I collapsed onto my bed, burying my face in my pillow to smother the mix of embarrassment and exhaustion swirling inside me.
As I lay there, my thoughts wandered back to everything that had happened that day. Why had Rudy taken me all the way to the edge of the village just to teach me magic? And what was with that old man? I didn't even know his name, and yet he and Rudy talked like they were in some business.
Something about it didn't sit right.
I rolled onto my back, staring at the wooden ceiling above me. For some reason, I couldn't shake the feeling that I'd been tricked. Not in a bad way, exactly, but still… Rudy had this way of doing things that made it hard to tell what he was really thinking.
The thought made me groan softly.
Why did he have to be so confusing all the time?
I hugged my pillow close, trying to push the nagging questions out of my mind. I didn't have the answers, and honestly, I wasn't sure I wanted them. Not yet, anyway. For now, I just wanted to close my eyes and let today fade away.
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Rudy often talks to me like I'm just a little kid. It's not that I mind... well, maybe I do, a little. Sometimes, how his curious eyes linger reminds me of how someone would watch interesting things—a mix of amusement and fascination. It's odd, but not unpleasant.
"Wait, Rudy. Have you ever had a pet?"
My sudden question catches him off guard. His head tilts, and for a brief moment, his expression flickers between confusion and curiosity.
"What brought this question on?"
I press on, ignoring the way my cheeks heat up. "I'm curious, so tell me!" My voice is firm, even as I step closer, tugging lightly at his sleeve to make him meet my gaze. There's this odd sensation, and I can't quite place why it's there.
His lips curve into one of his signature mischievous smiles. "If you must know, I think I had a white squirrel once... or perhaps it was a cat. Imagine whichever seems more fun."
A white squirrel? A cat? The image that pops into my mind is so ridiculous I can't help but giggle, even though I know he's probably joking.
"Rudy, you say such strange things! Sometimes I can't understand you at all!"
My laughter must have struck a nerve because his expression shifted to one of hurt. "Ouch! That stung. Don't be so harsh, alright? I'm doing my best here. Besides, you were the one who asked."
He looks so defeated that I almost feel bad... almost. "But every great wizard has a familiar, don't they?" I counter. "Shouldn't you have one too?"
He points dramatically toward his horse, Emrys, happily munching on a carrot nearby. "I do, in fact. Emrys here is my loyal companion. Grumpy as he may seem, he's got a heart of gold, I tell you."
I glance at the towering beast of a horse and feel an involuntary shiver travel down my spine. Emrys turns his large eyes on me, and I swear he's judging me with that stare. "He's scary," I whisper, barely loud enough for Rudy to hear.
His laughter echoes warmly around us. "Oh, if you think he's scary, I wonder what you'd say about an ancient vampiric beast."
"Huh?" I blink up at him, utterly lost. "What do you mean by that?"
He waves a hand dismissively, still smiling. "A tale for another time, perhaps." His expression carries that playful amusement he often wears when teasing me. I puff my cheeks in frustration, realizing too late that he's just having fun at my expense again.
I mutter, "Miss Roxy doesn't have a familiar, though."
His smile widens as he hums thoughtfully. "Roxy is an exceptional mage, but she doesn't quite grasp the true essence of being a wizard. A familiar isn't just a companion but a symbol of the bond between magical beings and yourself."
I nod, pretending to understand. Miss Roxy's lessons are always kinda helpful, but Rudy's methods... they're something else entirely. He's taught me that magic isn't just about casting spells. It's about creativity, strategy, and being prepared for anything. Even if his explanations often go over my head, they always stick with me.
"What are we practicing today?" I ask, eager to distract myself from Emrys' watchful gaze.
He leans on, a proud gleam in his eye. "You've already mastered the material I gave you. I didn't expect you to learn it so quickly, Sylphy."
His praise makes my heart leap, though I try not to show it. "Of course I did," I reply, trying to sound confident. Deep down, though, I'm thrilled. Rudy is incredibly talented, so hearing him compliment me feels like the greatest achievement.
"Well then," he says, "today, we're going to learn how to fly."
My entire body stiffens. "F-fly? But you said flying was useless!"
"It is," he agrees with a chuckle, spinning his apple lazily in one hand. "For showing off, at least. Flying never stuck with me, but it's an excellent exercise in magical control. To stay airborne, you need to maintain the air pressure around your body constantly. It's a skill that will help you with more advanced magic in the future. Easy, right?"
Easy? He must be joking. Flying sounds terrifying! If I mess up even once, I'll plummet straight to the ground. My stomach twists with anxiety, but I force myself to nod. "I-I'll do it!" I stammer, determined not to fall behind.
"Try your best," Rudy says, his grin widening. "Just remember, magic is as much about heart as it is about focus. Don't let fear weigh you down."
Somehow, his words make me feel a little braver. Even if he teases me endlessly, Rudy always makes me feel like I can do anything... as long as I try.
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I was in the air.
For a fleeting moment, everything seemed to fall into place. The balance, the magic coursing through me.
Then, I failed.
The ground rushed to meet me, the impact hurting my pride a little. Slight pain through my limbs as I lay there before standing up.
I expected to get it right on my second attempt. That's how things usually worked for me. I had always managed to adapt quickly, to learn from my mistakes, to push through with talent and determination.
But I failed again.
The fall was sharper this time, not just physically but in my heart. Doubt started to creep in, coiling itself around my thoughts like a serpent. Was I losing my touch? Or was this spell simply beyond me?
Rudy healed me and told me to practice again.
What followed was a series of failures, each one more embarrassing than the last. No matter how hard I tried, the wind slipped away at the worst moments, betraying me. Each fail leaves me more exhausted, and soon I'm shaking just trying to stand.
My track of bad progress didn't end with just this. I fell yet again, causing the wind surrounding my body to scatter.
Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure. Failure.
I lost count of how many times I have repeated the same mistake. My body must have been exhausted from the constant use of magic as it was becoming difficult to stand on my feet.
My breaths came in ragged gasps, tears blurring my vision as I struggled to keep going.
Give up.
My knees buckled, and I crumpled to the ground again, clutching handfuls of grass as though holding on to the earth itself might steady me.
"Do you see where the mistake lies?" Rudy asked gently after my latest failed attempt.
"I... I don't know!" I admit, tears stinging my eyes. I hate feeling like this—so weak and useless. I remember my weak self chasing. But instead of looking disappointed, Rudy smiles assuringly.
"We'll try again," he says, placing a reassuring hand on my shoulder.
"N-no, I...!" My voice cracked, and before I could stop it, a sob escaped. I wanted to promise I wouldn't give up, to insist I could do better, but the words caught in my throat.
To my surprise, Rudy pulled me into a warm hug. His arms enveloped me, steady and gentle. My mind goes blank as his arms wrap around me.
"Sometimes," he murmured, "a bit of comfort is just as important as encouragement."
I froze, my mind going blank at his rare display of affection. Slowly, the tension in my shoulders melted away. I let myself lean into him, the weight of the day easing just a little.
"Let's try for another time tomorrow," he said.
"But—" I began to protest, the ache of failure still fresh.
I wanted to protest, to make him see just how much effort I'd poured into today. My throat felt tight, and my eyes burned with the sting of tears. I felt the failure of today crushing me. It wasn't supposed to be like this.
"I'm proud of you, Sylphy. You've worked hard today."
His words wrapped around me, soothing yet bittersweet.
"Normally, I'd just whisper sweet words," he continued, a faint smile tugging at his lips. "But recently, I realized something—sometimes, closure is just as important."
His voice grew quieter, almost as if he was speaking to himself.
"A-ah…" I stayed quiet, unsure of what to say, unsure of how to process this strange moment.
His expression softened, sadness flickering in his gaze. Still, he held me gently, his words dispelling some of the ache in my chest.
"My mother hugs me when I am sad," he admitted, his gaze distant. "She said it could turn any burden into joy. At first, I thought it was silly, but... I came to cherish that warmth."
T-that's…
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" He smiled wistfully. "At first, I thought it was a little twisted, leaning on someone else to lighten my thoughts. But then… that warmth became something I cherished. From that moment on, I let myself be embraced. There's a kind of magic in it, don't you think?"
"Beautiful?" I whispered, glancing at him. Somehow, everything seemed brighter, as if his words had cast a spell over my surroundings. For a fleeting moment, it felt as though I was seeing the world through his eyes.
I didn't like how he still saw something more.
I looked down, guilt bubbling in my chest. "You're too good at everything," I admitted in a small voice. "That's why I'm mad. I know it's wrong, but... I can't help it. It's... ugly."
"Haha, far from it," he replied, a playful glint in his gaze. "Spend more time with me, and you'll see. For example, I'm a terrible cook. The last time I tried, Lilia nearly fainted!"
I blinked, caught off guard by his confession. My earlier bitterness faltered, replaced by a grudging amusement.
"Y-you shouldn't say that about yourself," I mumbled.
"Why not? It's true," he said with a wink. "But that's not the point. Sylphy, you've done more in a few days than most magi manage in months. Your progress is remarkable."
His praise felt foreign, almost surreal. I'd always been called a demon child. What kind of talent could he possibly see in me?
"Wh-what? No way that's true..." I muttered, my brows knitting together. It felt like he was just saying that to make me feel better.
"In any case," he continued, brushing off my doubts, "your progress isn't something you should worry about. When it comes to magecraft, you're like a fish in water. Honestly, most accomplished mages would probably look at you with envy."
"Envy?" I echoed, the word sounding strange to my ears. "But I just started… that doesn't make sense."
"It does," he replied with a knowing smile. "The way you control the flow of mana so naturally in just a few days. It's not something you see every day. Sure, you're not at my level yet," he added, teasing rather than mocking, "but it's still impressive."
His words felt like they didn't quite belong to me. Until now I have been called a demon kid by others. I had no idea what kind of talent he saw in me. And yet, despite my skepticism, his praise warmed something deep inside me.
"Teacher," I hesitated, glancing up at him, "you said I had talent, but… you're still not teaching me offensive spells. Why?"
"Ah, good question." He met my gaze. "It's because I'm taking a shortcut with you, Sylphy. Right now, I'm focusing on teaching you the fundamentals—the kind of magic that gives you control and versatility. Offensive spells are important, sure, but they're useless without a strong foundation. We'll get there, eventually."
I nodded slowly, not fully understanding, but trusting him nonetheless. Rudy always knew what he was doing, even when I didn't.
"Though," he added thoughtfully, "what type of mage you become depends on the world you encounter and the choices you make. I wonder what kind of people you'll meet."
That day, I learned I might have some talent. Whether it was true or not, I didn't know. But I decided to trust Rudy and follow his guidance.
"Come to think of it," Rudy said, his tone shifting, "today is a special day. It's Sylphy's birthday."
Birthday? But it was far too early. My next birthday wouldn't come for a few more years.
"What does that mean?" I asked hesitantly.
Instead of answering, his hand began to glow faintly, magic weaving in the air. When the light faded, a pair of earrings rested in his palm, shaped like tiny golden flowers. They shimmered softly as if imbued with magic. Were these real flowers?
"F-for me?" My voice wavered.
"That's right," he said with a warm smile. "Sylphy's birthday is a special occasion. I wanted to make sure it was celebrated properly. When I heard that people celebrate this time every year in a different country, I thought it was such a kind tradition."
A strange warmth bubbled up inside me, spreading outward until it felt like my whole body was glowing. I couldn't look away from the earrings.
Clutching them to my chest, I marveled at their craftsmanship before attempting to put them on. But as I fumbled with them, I froze. Something had slipped my mind.
"…Oh," Rudy laughed awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. "I forgot—you don't have your ears pierced yet. H-haha…"
"S-seriously, Rudy!" I scowled lightly, my cheeks heating with embarrassment. His laugh was light, and carefree while I shook in embarrassment.
The air between us grew lighter, more comfortable. Still, a question lingered at the back of my mind.
"Rudy," I began, my voice barely above a whisper, "you promised to train me until I became a true wizard. But… if I do become one, will you still stay by my side? I'll work hard—I'll be the best, I promise! I'll catch up to you!"
His expression softened, and the light in his eyes flickered at my words.
"I can't promise that," he said quietly. "But… I will try my best, okay?"
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A special chapter in which Sylphie aka Sylphy meets Merlin's food.
It was a complete accident that I ended up at the Greyrat household that day. Mom and Dad had some important errands to run in the town, and I absolutely did not want to go with them. Staying behind seemed like the perfect escape, or so I thought until they decided I couldn't be left alone and arranged to spend the day with Rudy's family.
Before I could even protest, I was practically bundled up and delivered to their doorstep.
And that's how I found myself standing awkwardly in front of a blue-haired girl who looked a little older than me. Her expression was pinched, and she seemed to be in the middle of grumbling about something.
Probably Rudy.
"H-hello, I'm Sylphiette," I said, trying to be polite despite my nerves. My hands fidgeted behind my back as I forced a smile. "Y-you seem a bit older than me, so I thought I should say hi. Is that okay?"
For a moment, she froze. Her eyes widened, and then, to my horror, she burst into tears.
"I—I'm not girl! I'm a woman!" she sobbed, her voice shaking. "Why does everyone always say that?!"
I panicked, my ears burning as I scrambled to fix whatever I'd done wrong.
"S-sorry! Did I say something bad? I didn't mean it like that! I'm so, so sorry!"
But no matter how much I apologized, she just kept crying and mumbling something about her appearance and misunderstandings. I was at a total loss, my guilt sinking in deeper by the second.
Luckily, Rudy's mom appeared and gently patted the girl's shoulder, murmuring something comforting to her. She gave me a kind smile before guiding me away, leaving the blue-haired girl to calm down on her own.
"Don't worry, Sylphy," Miss Zenith said as we walked. "Roxy's just sensitive about certain things. She'll be fine."
I nodded quickly, still feeling bad but relieved that someone had stepped in to help.
Miss Zenith led me to a room that reminded me of the kitchen at my own house. Inside, Rudy and a woman I hadn't met before, who I later learned was Miss Lilia, were engaged in a heated discussion.
"Uh, e-excuse me," I said hesitantly, my voice barely above a whisper.
Both of them turned to look at me, and Rudy's eyes lit up like he'd just had the best idea in the world. His grin widened in a way that made me immediately take a step back.
"Perfect! Sylphy's here so she can decide!"
"Master Rudeus," Miss Lilia interrupted, her tone sharp but polite, "forgive my boldness, but I cannot allow you to poison this young girl."
P-poison me!?
"What—what do you mean by poison!?" I stammered, my voice rising in panic.
Before I could get a proper answer, Rudy set something down in front of me with a flourish. It was a beautiful and shining dessert, like something out of a storybook. Its presentation was so perfect that, for a moment, I forgot all about the strange tension in the room.
But something wasn't right. Miss Zenith and Miss Lilia both avoided looking directly at it as if it radiated some unseen danger. I couldn't understand why. The dessert looked delicious.
With a cautious glance, I took a small bite.
The moment it touched my tongue, my body betrayed me. My face twisted in pure horror, and I spat it out instinctively, unable to swallow.
"Why is it so disgusting?!" I couldn't stop myself from shouting, my voice cracking as the lingering taste burned into my memory.
Rudy stared at me, utterly betrayed, as if I'd stomped on his dreams. "Sylphy... how could you?"
Miss Lilia sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Master Rudeus has a peculiar gift for creating dishes that appear flawless while being utterly inedible. It's a recurring problem."
I gaped at him, still trying to recover from the taste. "W-why would you make something like that!?"
Rudy muttered under his breath, something about treacherous knights who told him otherwise. What?
Zenith burst into laughter, leaning against the wall for support. Even Miss Lilia let out a quiet chuckle, shaking her head at Rudy's theatrics.
As for me, I could only groan, vowing never to trust anything Rudy cooked ever again.