Filthy Gamer in Narutoverse

"Hoh~ Nono-chan, you're growing more and more beautiful. You'd soon compete with Tsunade, huh," Jiraiya chuckled as Nono smiled while setting another three vats of wine for her master and her friends before adjusting her glasses, "It's nothing much, Jiraiya-san. Besides, I wish I could say the same about you but I've seen Minato-kun... he is cuter than you."

Orochimaru stifled his chuckle as Jiraiya's expression fell. Tsunade rarely invited the rest of her teammates into the clan compound itself so Jiraiya was intent on raiding her collection of alcohol if not her closet!

"Ah, sharp as ever, girl. It's a shame you became Tsunade's secretary or the village could benefit greatly from such a Kunoichi, hehe, especially me after hmm... 7 years." The man ascertained and spoke proudly, "And I would have shown you why the village hails me as the most talented shinobi!"

Nono blinked. Jiraiya and dirty remarks came hand-in-hand so that didn't bother the bespectacled, gentle-looking Genjutsu mistress but she couldn't help but speak up, "I thought Kai-kun is the most talented shinobi... and then comes Minato? That's what Tsunade-sama told me."

"Hey, no way—" Jiraiya was stumped before he gasped while Orochimaru interjected, "Right, thank you for the wine, Nono."

"Of course," the girl chortled and left with a happy strut as Jiraiya groaned with a scowl, "World's unfair... you'll both see how well my novel is received because of the joy it would bring to others!"

Orochimaru smirked and remarked, "Join the club. Besides, you of all have no reason to complain about the unfairness of the world."

"Now, now," knowing what Orochimaru was getting at, Tsunade snickered, "Grass is always greener on the other side. Hah~ and here I'm jealous of the two of you. Jiraiya, you only have to train one kid while Orochimaru, you only have one talented shinobi, really, Nawaki. And here I am," she boasted with her nose stuck up, "Having to teach not one but THREE talents. Ah, and Kai won't let the team rest for even a day. So many missions," she drawled.

Jiraiya scoffed, "And you think others haven't noticed? While you and Sensei have been at it for months now, for whatever reason—"

"Whatever reason?" Tsunade scoffed, "We were ANBUshed and I still haven't gotten a concrete reason as Sensei just shoved everything under the rug!"

Tsunade has tried to use the other evidence, such as the piece of flesh from the first pursuer of theirs to try and find who was actually behind it since this third party also made things dubious but until now, no concrete evidence aside from Root truly have been infiltrated by another institution was known.

Orochimaru sighed softly. He no longer held trust for the Third Hokage thanks to one particular bandaged package and could see clearly that Tsunade was frustrated not because of the attack but the sense of betrayal she felt clashing with her loyalty to their Sensei.

"And that's what I'm getting at," Jiraiya shrugged, "Well... Sensei may have asked me to—"

He suddenly stiffened as Orochimaru and Tsunade realized what he was about to say. But spending far more time with Tsunade, the man with the snake-like features picked his cup and pulled a little back from the table as Tsunade inquired coldly, "Did he ask you to teach my apprentices something before they or I approached you ourselves?"

Jiraiya took a deep breath before scoffing, "Whaaat? Nooo, nothing like that..."

Tsunade only seemed unamused but soon she smirked and leaned on the table, letting her shoulder slouch slightly and she then felt her breasts easily rest on the table. A cocky smirk developed on her lips as Orochimaru sighed inwardly while Jiraiya's nostrils flared as his gaze zeroed down on the wonderful weapons that would bring peace to the world.

"Ehe~" A slurred and drunken giggle escaped the man's lips unbefitting his position as one of the few Elite Jonins of the village as Tsunade purred, "Come on, Jiraiya. You know I only get irritated because of clan stuff interrupting with me gambling away all the Senju Heritage. Help me out here, be honest with me for once."

While she smirked, the sincere plea made Jiraiya's gaze recover a flash of complicated emotion while Orochimaru looked momentarily sullen.

"Well... fine, sigh. Sensei did ask me to try and teach Kai-kun some of my mojo... both kinds. A shinobi needs to be versatile and the previous sex-ed only traumatized many that graduated from the Academy but hey, at least, they focus on training than boobs. That's a win...

Sarutobi Sensei wanted to see how well and quickly he learned my stuff. And then, I think, he was planning to do the same with Orochimaru. We both got capable apprentices, no doubt about that. Your brother is a full-blown chunin with everything but the official promotion while Minato... is a freak in fuinjutsu because he just keeps on expanding on his learning base.

But..."

Jiraiya sipped his wine and pouted, "Sensei thinks we are still wasting Kai's talents. You know he has nothing special going on... but he's reported to have mastered a few elemental jutsu. Think what he can achieve with practicing their respective nature transformation."

Tsunade scoffed internally. Nothing special? The boy had an affinity with all nature chakra. He HAS mastered three of the nature transformation practice already! He's got explosive Uzumaki tendencies of imprinting things with fuinjutsu and has enough Genjutsu mastery to tackle Mikoto with a two-tomoe Sharingan.

'Nothing special...' she sneered.

"Sensei's also afraid of overworking the boy. So he wants to start it easy. He needs to growl enough to have his other chakra growth spurts but that's about it."

"A kage candidate, huh..." Orochimaru smirked, "Isn't that a little too early?"

"At any given time, there are always a few Kage candidates. For instance, in our generation, it's us three. Even now, Sakumo Hatake and Yata Uchiha are Kage candidates, too," Tsunade pulled back as Jiraiya groaned reluctantly while Orochimaru nodded.

"Hmm, so, if their training goes as intended, the next candidates after us would be Fugaku Uchiha, Kai, and Minato..." Jiraiya muttered.

"And to think I have an apprentice who keeps claiming he'd be the next Hokage," Orochimaru drawled.

"Join the club," Tsunade smirked, "I have a redheaded potato doing the same. It's kind of cute, isn't it?"

"Yes," Orochimaru smiled.

"Still..." Tsunade looked at her white-haired teammate, "What did Sensei precisely want you to teach him?"

"Not that it matters at the moment since I won't actually get into it but I was hoping he and Minato would get some crazy seals done and then maybe try and develop something that Minato is interested in. It's just basic Shape Transformation at this point that Minato chanced upon. I mean, they don't have the reserves for anything crazy but they can practice Shape Transformation with it just fine. He can practice Nature Transformation later."

Tsunade nodded and sighed. At this point, she wasn't averse to teaching Kai 'better things', well, the things that couldn't be found in the archive but his chakra was too shallow to even start on many things including a simple shadow clone Jutsu that would drain a lot out of him much less her own special jutsu.

---

Kai looked at the blonde youth who had a blank expression. To not give any reason for letting a weird gossip or rumor circulate amongst other six-year-old fanbase of his, Kai agreed to meet Minato in Jiraiya's Training Ground after the break of dawn the next day.

Kai's hand was drenched with stream liquid as the rubber had been popped while a few splashes also fell on Minato's face who hadn't moved far away. They both looked silently at the wonder Kai had created. And boy it was intense!

"Uh..." Minato slowly came to be and plopped down on the ground, "Kai-kun, I sometimes forget that you're crazier than I am..."

"Well," Kai blinked. It was simple really. What Minato was practicing was the basics of Shape Transformation that he was at the cusp of mastering but while Kai started from [Chakra Thread], Minato began by shaping the chakra reminiscent of a ball using a water balloon as a crutch. After all, in time, even without a balloon, Minato should be able to form a gentle chakra construct made of rotating chakra alone the size of a ball.

Kai sat down, too, and inquired curiously, finally remembering why he was interested in the youth in front of him, too.

'Chakra reserve about 40000... finally, some fucking decent normalcy,' Kai grinned, "What brought this training on in the first place?"

Minato looked a little out of it with a basket filled with water balloons placed next to him as he groaned, "It's the Ichibi... wait, you do know about Jinchuriki, right? Sensei told me about Kushina..."

"Oh, yeah, I do. Massive monsters with world-ending powers that ironically lost to the strongest of shinobi and then got sealed. First, into items, then later, into humans," Kai nodded, "Why the One-Tailed beast, though?"

"Did you hear about the Jinchuriki of Ichibi using a disastrous jutsu that destroyed a fifth of our war fortification?" Minato questioned in return.

"Yeah, Tsunade Sensei told me about it once we returned from our mission. It was a Jutsu called..."

"Tailed Beast Bomb," Minato muttered with a somber expression as he added, "So... that got me to thinking. The only difference between Tailed Beasts and humans is size, chakra reserves, physical features, and some special nature transformation... but we have something in common. Chakra. If the tailed beasts can use chakra to form a Tailed Beast Bomb... can't a shinobi replicate something similar?"

"And... you have studied Tailed Beast Bombs... how?" Kai questioned, making Minato grin, "Oh, Sensei has such information to share. He usually teaches me the least amount possible and leaves me to my devices but the good thing is, he isn't quick to refute my requests."

Minato then saw Kai suddenly flopping on his back and spreading his arms wide open as he looked at the sky.

"What are you doing?"

"That's how I think," Kai shrugged and mumbled, "So the main idea is to replicate the destructiveness with meager chakra... relatively, huh? Do you know how an actual Tailed Beast Bomb is formed?"

"No," Minato shook his head, "The information I have is about various instances this technique was used by a Jinchuriki and the level of destruction it causes. Again, the idea isn't to form a Tailed Beast Bomb, but a pure chakra attack that is as solid as an elemental jutsu."

"Wait," Kai sat up, "An elemental jutsu has two basic foundations. Nature Transformation and Shape Transformation. When a Shinobi masters them both, they can shift and modify various jutsus to their own needs. What if a Tailed Beast Bomb, or the replica you're creating, has a nature transformation, too? Wouldn't it just be as simple as a Fireball Jutsu?"

His words stumped Minato and both of them fell silent in their thoughts.

"Wait... no, this is different," Minato's eyes gleamed, "What I want to form is a solid construct of chakra first, like a Tailed Beast Bomb. It has substance. A Fireball Jutsu is molding chakra into a fire nature and THEN shaping it. This time, the Shaping of chakra comes first."

Kai nodded eagerly, "Yeah, so if you want a more stabilized chakra technique it must have a constant flow! That's what chakra is, it keeps flowing. Even though shapes can restrict the flow... nobody says that the chakra itself cannot flow within the construct!"

After all, Chakra Thread was similar, too. It was a thin thread of chakra invisible to the naked eyes at the highest mastery BECAUSE the chakra flowing within the thread has been congealed to a level just above microscopic level. The only way to deal with such a Chakra Thread is to either predict its connections or just spam Byakugan.

"So, our main focus is to find a pattern of chakra flow that creates the most destruction!" Minato grinned before both of their eyes sparkled.

---

"Huff!"

Minato collapsed to the ground with an exhausted expression as his grey jacket was set aside while the last of the balloon was destroyed. Currently, they were still in the testing phase but... Kai sorely wished to beat himself up. This man was grind personified. After all... because of him, Kai managed to slip through a loophole and form various chakra shapes that are useless but brought him a good number of SP.

{A/N: I won't be describing these techniques... just to fill the word count. I mean, the names are good enough of an explanation and they don't do anything.}

[Chakra Spiral Ball (5/5)]

[Chakra Cube (3/3)]

[Chakra Cone (1/1)]

With each successive shape, Kai was granted more and more knowledge which meant that the resulting shape that had overlapping knowledge would provide a low level. But... 9 SP in one session wasn't bad at all. And Kai also managed to grind the [Shape Transformation] to some extent.

"Come on, you ain't done in, right?" Kai grinned as he remarked, "Now it's time for MY training."

Minato slowly sat up and stretched his arms before chuckling, "Ah, sorry. It's only right I help you with your training."

"Well... I don't really need help but I'm tired of asking which one Jiraiya would like to see since he bothers me a lot while I train."

"Sensei does?"

"Yeah," Kai took out a scroll before unsealing it as a plume of smoke revealed the contents soon enough which made Minato choke on his spit and blush fiercely as he averted his gaze from the stack of lewd magazines that just appeared.

"W-what are you doubt, Kai-kun?"

"Training my transformation technique to the level unheard by anyone. But... finding new things to transform is becoming increasingly tedious. So I usually just change the size of bust, hips, and the like. And Jiraiya does have an expertise and would also transform just for the kick of it."

Kai was covered in a large poof of smoke before 'his' voice turned mature while Minato... looked dazed before he muttered, "I have to help him train..." his gaze turning towards one of the open magazines as he certainly saw something he liked...

---

"Sigh," Hiruzen looked at Tsunade sitting across the table and sighed slightly, "Tsunade, if this is about Kai—"

"I'm here to tell you that it was the right decision," Tsunade interjected and spoke calmly, "Just because Kai is in an awkward stage where he can't learn more things from me should have already made me find someone else to instruct him for a while."

Hiruzen blinked in surprise before nodding, "Hmm, and I suppose... I shouldn't have bypassed your authority and considered you a master good enough to understand my reasoning."

But the lack of apology from both sides made it clear that their relationship was still rocky as Hiruzen cleared his throat and smiled, "Well, Jiraiya told me that Minato-kun has an inspiring idea. Want to watch them train right now?"

The Hokage took out the crystal ball that can view through almost everywhere in Konoha except for private properties and clan compounds.

Tsunade looked interested as the image began to flicker on the crystal ball as Hiruzen bit on his pipe, "I wonder what kind of techniques the two can pull off."

"N— *bzzt* Nah, when changing the bust size, keep in mind that nipples need to be a bit more tasteful—"

Tsunade's and Hiruzen's eyes widened as they saw two well-endowed women, a brunette in a bikini instructing the redhead before the brunette grinned, "Now check this out— Transformation Jutsu: Paradise!"

The next second, blood flowed out of Hiruzen's nose as the brunette turned into a familiar blonde with a pair of amber pupils and a body too sensual to ignore!

"Damn those fuckers! Geniuses, my ass!" Tsunade stood up while Hiruzen already leaned back on his chair, his head cocked up with a foolish grin as blood continued to flow from his nostrils.

"And finally, this is one of the more interesting ones. Think of it as customizing yourself. Transformation Jutsu— Future Inches of Destruction."

This time, the stunned redhead in the image hurriedly pulled back a hulking man made of pure muscle and tanned skin stood with short, well-trimmed dark hair and a pair of dark eyes. Yet... Tsunade's vision swam for a second and in the next moment, blood dripped down her nostrils before she weakly collapsed onto her chair.

"We... keep this to ourselves..." Hiruzen whispered weakly.

"Y-yeah..." Tsunade whispered with quivering lips, her eyes still trailing the figure who laughed loudly before turning into the familiar boy... but yeah, she deemed him more dangerous than even smooth-talking Dan should he turn out THAT way.

***

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