Filthy Gamer in Narutoverse

Beyond the porcelain mask that held the woman's violet eyes, Kai noticed many other things. Hints, more like, that made his breath hitch for a moment. The woman's bright red hair was tied into two perfect buns, the kind that you'd wanna hold from behind with a golden, fan-shaped headdress pinned on her hair. Two paper tags hung from each of the hair buns.

The Left one had— Taming the Fox.

The Right on contained— Still on Top.

His gaze, however, silently trailed down. The woman wore light, which also meant she had her curves exposed to others. Slender and filled in just the right places, a little lacking when it compared to his Sensei, Kai noticed. He's an honest boy, after all. But what attracted him were the uncovered feet of the woman. Nah, he wasn't into THAT.

But he'd been focused on only a single set of feet for two years. Wrinkled or not, he'd recognize the pair in an instant.

Just the silent hints, that Kai knew the figure purposely gave, however, made him peeved. Cranking back the pressure of the fuinjutsu weights on his body to normal, Kai gave the woman a look. It may not be his place to speak so... overbearingly but damnit, he loved Mito, and impersonating her younger self, the picture of whom he'd also seen in the Uzumaki mansion back in Konoha, wasn't appreciated at all!

"That's a joke in bad taste," Kai scowled, "You could have done several things, like maybe crashing the funeral or something else but impersonating a dead woman? That's 0 points from me."

Tsunade and the woman behind the mask were stunned before they blinked and the lady in the mask chortled, "0, huh? You've soured my heart, dear. So? You seem annoyed enough. What will you do about this?"

Kai noticed that the woman's chakra was beneath even a genin. A chakra suppression technique, he realized. But that also meant the woman would need time, no matter how short, to utilize chakra again and that would be his chance to set the woman straight. But...

'Why the hell is Tsunade amused...?' Kai was stunned. Wasn't Mito her grandma? Didn't she have an ounce of compassion? Even Kai felt he had just one... or two ounces of it but he, at least, did!

'Unless...' He hesitated for a second. Again, he knew that nobody around him was aware that he can sense intent in their chakra. While the woman in front of him could even mask her intent, Tsunade couldn't. Despite the frown on his Sensei's face, she was mad cackling inwardly!

'One way to find out...' Kai smirked as his entire intent converged. His muscles tensed and his whole body screamed a sense of aggression he rarely revealed.

He licked his dry lips for a second and then tested the grounds as he intended after a moment of logical deduction. Of course, if he had gamer mind, he would know just the kind of risk he was taking since battling would have been easier.

"If you wanted to impersonate Mito-sama... at least get her toes straight. She had ugly ones. Thick, brawny, sometimes stinking! Her nails jutted out and whatnot. Yours are just fin—"

Kai didn't need to see his life flash past against him to move at a quick speed as dodging was easier than wasting a millisecond on Body Replacement Jutsu.

Tsunade's expression was frozen as the masked lady's punch tore into the ground before causing massive ruptures that pushed chunks of earth up and uprooted the trees.

"Oh... I'm now sore and annoyed," her melodious chime echoed as Kai scowled even harder and stood his ground this time, "And what? All that drama was just bullshit?"

His words stopped the woman in her tracks as he was covered in a poof and the next second, he transformed into an elderly Mito who spoke in her aged voice, "Oh, Kai, take care of Kushina. Oh, Kai-kun, accept the mission. Oh, brat, study harder. Oh, boy, your fuinjutsu is subpar..." Every time this 'Mito' spoke, her expression would sometimes show kindness and sometimes exasperation as if she was the real Mito herself.

*Poof*

Kai reverted once he was done and waited for his answer. No, he wasn't being a little bitch with feelings but damn, Kushina cried the hardest, and for what? A sham? No matter how logical the woman's reason would be... Kai felt he had given enough to demand an explanation in return. And he was certainly filled with sass that annoyed both the women in front of him, something Kai could feel... even from the masked one.

"What happened—" The commotion attracted Mikoto who stood beside Tsunade and had her Sharingan working while throwing the masked lady a cautious look.

But her words only elicited a reaction from Tsunade who waved her hand and signaled the Uchiha fledgling to not make a move while the figure wearing a loose but thin white dress and Kai continued to stare at one another.

And then she stepped towards him, making Mikoto tense but seeing Tsunade unmoving, she had to stay rooted, too, lest she'd be written up for insubordination... again.

Very soon, the woman towered over Kai. Her calm gaze pinned him down as her muffled whisper echoed softly enough so that only he could hear her, "I really am sorry. No excuses for it, really. But I'd say what I did was beneficial for me, you, and Kushina."

Uncaring if he was pressing his luck, he demanded, "How?"

"Beneficial for me because I am free of my previous obligations and can give support where I must. I have to thank you for that... and in time, I will. Beneficial for Kushina because she gained the only complete Uzumaki legacy that rested with me. And beneficial for you because I allowed Kushina to share it with whomever she wishes. We both know who she would share it with once she starts practicing herself."

Kai scoffed, "And did you think that she would want to learn things beforehand just to be all smug about it? And how is making her a Jinchuriki beneficial?"

She didn't explain anymore as her hand fell on his head and ruffled his hair, "I meant what I said. And..." her gentle coo turned into a frosty whisper as she leaned down while her hand was only a few tense muscles away from balling his hair, "What was that about toes?"

"Ah," Kai smirked, "I meant, what they'd be like if I wasn't there to massage them every day. And this brings me to the next part... how about I continue my services? Even if for a day? I could... maybe massage your whole body and make it more beautiful..."

Her giggle echoed through the mask as her eyes glinted for a second. Yet... how the hell she still kept her chakra and intent so hidden was out of his scope of understanding at the moment.

"Some other day when I really feel tired. As you can see... age is just a number after all. It's the mind that needs to stay young."

"Okay, I got none of it," Kai blurted as she stood up again, "You will, probably. I came before you BECAUSE I did not wish for any misunderstanding," she asserted, "And I trust you. Enough that I'm offering to remove that mark... you can keep the shell of the mark to prove your status as the guardian in Konoha but the rest isn't needed."

Kai looked at the back of his hands. He was well aware that the reason why she was offering this wasn't just trust. No, according to what she had revealed long before, he always had her trust... but some things needed to be done, that's all. Yet, the mark was also a test. It was probably an A-rank fuinjutsu mark, in Kai's opinion and he could remove it once he reaches that level of mastery.

But...

He beamed, "It doesn't make any sense to keep it on as a test for my skills later on, huh. Sure, I'd forgive you after you remove the mark."

The woman scoffed as she held both of his hands while the seals on his arms, both, the Uzumaki and the Senju ones, were completely hollowed out, "Not that I needed your forgiveness, cheeky brat..."

"But I forgive you," He chortled with a smirk, making the woman shake her head, "Makes me wonder if it even impacted you enough or not."

"Oh, it did. Why else would I have even gotten angry otherwise?" Kai tilted his head and checked the seals on his hands before nodding internally. It was an unexpected gain, really. Now he can 'maliciously' spank the Uzumaki disaster in their home in Konoha.

"Hmm, be a good boy. I'll keep in contact with only you in Konoha, Tsunade knows that. I don't have to tell you to not spread the news about this, right?"

Had it been Kai... he would have used a similar seal on someone else to make them keep the secret but just her lack of it in this regard made him quite... emotional. Oh, he would cry a river if he wasn't distracted by the smashable grandma's body.

"Uh, yeah, of course. Can I ask you something?"

"I have many matters to take care of... but sure, your team would be leaving today so I can entertain one last question."

"Is this a transformation jutsu?"

Smirking underneath her mask, she giggled, "Get strong enough to find out."

'Not old enough?' Before Kai could even share his thoughts, the woman's body disappeared in a flicker, way faster than his own but not as silent, making him a little proud about his Chakra Paws skill.

Kai glanced at Tsunade who now sported a discreet smirk herself, making him roll his eyes and groan.

Women— vicious ones indeed. And he just had to desire a whole lot of them, didn't he?

Compared to all of them, the gentle Nono and the sweet pup Tsume were beginning to look better options to find friendship in.

---

As 'she' predicted, or maybe concocted behind the scenes, Team Tsunade left Uzushiogakure three hours later once Ruuji Uzumaki, the Uzushiokage, provided them with his seal of acceptance that would be delivered to their Hokage and mark the end of their mission but... once Heijo left, surprising even Team Tsunade was the act of the space-time ninjutsu seal suddenly fizzling out.

Uzushiogakure just cut off the last contact with the outside world.

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