Elden Ring: Miquella's Consort

Miquella :"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was changing his name to Alistair."

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*Clank clank*

Sounds of heavy rocks hitting the ground echoed in the closed space, catching Alistair's attention. He turned to see several more imp statues standing in his way, ready for mischief. He scoffed :"Come here."

Putting away his swords, he cracked his knuckles as he walked forward. Forget about weapons, he was going to enjoy the feeling of shattering them into dust with his own hands. As one pounced at him, it didn't even have the chance to swing down it. Alistair swung his fist, his strength allowing him to punch right through its little arms and turn its head into pebbles.

The other ones, unafraid, followed their fallen brother's example and attacked. He dodged one before throwing a right hook, sending its head flying, before sidestepping another's attack and kicking it flying into the wall. As it tried to get up, his foot made its head and the wall besties.

He weaved again and grabbed one's head, throwing it at several more who were coming at him hard enough to crush them all. Alistair grinned as they all broke into pieces :"Strike! Full marks for me."

Another one tried to sneak attack him, but he grabbed it by its face and crushed it effortlessly. Kicking away the body that was falling, he dusted himself off :"Alright, we can go now."

He continued on his way, killing the imp statues that attacked him until he reached a set of stairs. But as he walked down, his eyes widened at what was on the other side :"Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit~!!"

He ran back up as fast as he could, managing to dodge the fire attack of the pillar trap down the path. He barely managed to dodge it. So close to getting burned that he felt the heat against Miquella's beloved cake.

Dusting off his ass, he sighed in relief :"Phew... that was too close..." Sighing in relief again when he saw that his clothes weren't burned.

"(Please be careful of my lovely butt.)"

He grinned in amusement :"Yours?"

"(You said that my butt is yours, so naturally, yours is mine.)"

"*Chuckling* Eh, fair enough."

"(That's right, so please be careful to not hurt my amazing belonging.)"

"Hahaha aye aye, sir."

He waited for the fire to come and stop again before he started running, looking out for any openings. When he spotted the one, his kick found the hidden imp statue's face. As it tried to get up, the wall got yet another bestie.

Once the fire stopped again, he ran into the open space. Just tapping it with a bit of force was enough to deactivate it. As it went into the ground, no longer a threat, he continued.

The room he walked into was a grand, open chamber. The place was humongous, with but a bridge connecting one side to the other. Candles on the bridge illuminated the way, but it was hard to see what was below if one fell from the bridge.

In the distance, below a statue and on top of a dead, withered corpse, he saw a glow, indicating an item. But after a short smile, he turned even more serious. After all, who could forget what would be faced in this chamber when going to pick that item?

But although serious, he still couldn't contain his grin :"Miquella, it's finally showtime." Ringing his Spirit Calling Bell, he summoned his demigod consort. But instead of appearing like how he normally would, he descended from the air onto Alistair's back, glowing an ethereal golden light in a phantom-like state rather than his normal form.

His calm but cruel grin matched nicely with Alistair's bloodthirsty one :"Then let us fight together, my beloved consort." Halfway across the bridge, two very familiar roars were heard before two figures dropped from the ceiling, one landing on each side of the bridge.

What were they? Grafted Scions. And not just one, but two of them. Alistair could still remember the way his heart dropped when he saw the scene. The sheer panic of getting jumped by two Grafted Scions and hurrying to kill at least one of them before the other could get close was just sickening.

"Oh... so that's what you meant by a special foe..." Miquella was speechless, before he scoffed softly, his little smirk returning :"No matter. We are not the same as the first day, after all."

"You've got," Alistair twirled his blades, smirking deviously :"That right."

"AHHH!!" The Grafted Scion screamed. Iframing through the sound waves, Miquella fired a Flame Sling as he swung his swords. The fire ball to the face stopped its yell, making it yell in pain as its face and small real body burned.

It yelled again, but in pain rather than for attacking, as it guarded itself with its greatshield. But with its giant body, the swift slashes of Alistair's blades easily found places to cut.

He slashed a few times before the abomination tried to counterattack. But it was what they were waiting for. Just as its slow arm readied its swords, their assault intensified tenfold. Their moves synchronized as Alistair slashed, slashed and slashed while Miquella chain-casted Catch Flame point-blank instantly after each swing of his consort's blades.

It wasn't like a two people against one monstrosity fight. They acted like they were one body and soul. Although inexperienced in fighting together, Miquella had watched him fight long enough to know his every move.

As he watched the battle carefully to accompany Alistair's movements perfectly, he also kept a watch on the Grafted Scion's health bar. He smiled proudly at the rate of which it depleted.

Under their synchronized assault, it didn't even take 20 seconds before the Grafted Scion was beheaded and turned into dust. Their onslaught and speed of killing its companion alarmed the other Grafted Scion.

Unlike its friend, it didn't charge straight away. Instead, keeping its shield steady in front of it and two swords ready for swinging. It walked carefully on the bridge, intending to use the small space and its own large frame to its advantage.

The consort and god smirked, careful themselves. Twirling his sword comfortably, Alistair kept his eyes on the Grafted Scion as he picked up what he had come so far for, the Erdtree's Favor, and instantly marveled at the benefits it brought. He had made the right choice of finding it.

-

[Erdtree's Favor: Raises maximum HP (3%), Stamina (7%), and Equip Load (5%).

[HP: 1355 -> 1477

Stamina: 113 -> 118

Equip Load: 64.1 -> 67.3]

-

Licking his teeth, he rolled his shoulders to pop them as walked towards the Grafted Scion :"Now, where were we, my dear God?"

Miquella, sensing his rise in power, smirked back :"I believe we were about to kill this monstrosity, my beloved consort."

"Shall we finish the job then?"

"It would be my pleasure." Seeing that it wasn't coming closer, the golden femboy's smirk only widened :"But our accursed friend doesn't seem to be so excited. Let's give him a little... encouragement."

A Flame Sling appeared in his raised hand before he threw it. The Grafted Scion's shield protected it, but then came another. And another. And another. The Grafted Scion wanted to play smart and block all of his attacks, but unfortunately for it, Miquella, as a Spirit Summon, didn't have a limit to his FP.

And unluckily for it, it only realized that blocking was fruitless when only 1/3 its health bar was remaining. Causing Alistair to snicker :"You know what? You can have this kill, Miq. There's not much left to do."

"Oh, you have my thanks, my beloved~." Miquella, basking in the feeling of power, smiled sinisterly, his assault relentlessly. If not for the battle, Alistair wouldn't be able to resist kissing those full, smirking lips he loved so much :'God, he's so hot when he's mean.'

"AAAHHH!!" The Grafted Scion screeched before marching at him. However, with Miquella shooting fire balls constantly, its health bar was just about depleted. It swung its blades, hoping to end them. But that hope was shattered when Alistair's own blades blocked its own and Miquella threw one last Flame Sling at its face, frying it.

[Runes: 1,166 (583 x 2)]

With a final wail, it also turned into ashes that returned to the Erdtree. With them gone, Alistair looked back at his grinning God Consort with an equally excited grin :"Good job, Miq! Nice teamwork!"

Miquella nodded with a pleased smile :"I am happy we had such amazing teamwork! Good job to you as well, my beloved consort."

"Hahahaha it wasn't really teamwork though? I was just fighting like usual and you were doing an amazing job of following my movements. You have a really awesome battle IQ despite never having fought yourself."

Miquella blushed, happy about not letting his consort down as he buried his face in Alistair's neck, drowning himself in his scent :"Hm, thank you~. But well, I have watched you fight for quite a while now whenever I was inside of your mind, so it's not really surprising that I knew your fighting style."

"True, but just seeing something doesn't mean you can do the exact thing, so my point still stands. You didn't have a single flaw when following my attacks with your own attacks."

"Hahahaha whatever you say then, my beloved consort. Whatever you say."

For a moment, they just stood there. Basking in each other's warmth as Miquella hugged his neck happily. Being able to fight was always an unachievable dream in the past, so was it really a surprise that he was so happy right now?

And Alistair, being the good lover that he was, could obviously read the mood and his thoughts. So he just stood there, letting Miquella enjoy his warmth and scent as he lovingly stroked his golden hair.

But knowing that it wasn't the right time or place for cuddling, the golden femboy stopped after a fond kiss to his sexy neck :"As much as I'd love to stay like this, this isn't the right place. Let's finish this dungeon so we can get back and cuddle, alright~?"

Alistair's lips pulled up into a childish grin :"You got it! Then hang on tight, cause we're speedrunning this shit! For cuddles!!" Making Miquella giggle loudly as he put the pedal to the metal.

-

"And~ we're done!" As the Chariot crumbled into pieces, the Tarnished received the message of the Erdtree Greatbow appearing in his inventory :"Now, let's go back!"

"To where?" Miquella asked innocently, but Alistair's smile was anything but innocent :"To the place we love so much~."

"Ooh~." The femboy demigod's gorgeous face reddened, a little smirk that matched Alistair's in intent appearing as he bit his sexy lip :"So my Alistair is impatient, hm...?"

"Impatient would be the underestimatement of the day, sweetheart~." As he kissed his cheek, the scenery changed abruptly.

- (Third Church of Marika)

But Miquella barely had the chance to register it before he was in Alistair's strong arms and his lips crashed into his plumper ones. His eyes widened in surprise, but closed moments later as lust filled them to the brim.

Loving the feeling of the muscular arms holding his waist and keeping his still trembling and weak legs from giving up, his delicate, beautiful arms circled around his consort's neck. Deepening the kiss as Alistair kissed his now sexy lips harder than ever. He wasn't even trying to go down his throat like he always would. His entire attention was just on his lips. (A/N: Can you blame him though👀? Image:)

Pulling back to catch his breath, he smiled lustfully :"Somebody seems to like my lips." Shivering at how much Alistair's pupils had dilated from pure lust for him. His arms around his slim waist tightened, not willing to let him get away. He couldn't help but giggle at his horniness.

Seeing that his eyes were locked onto his lips, he bit the lower one with a cheeky grin, making his Tarnished consort let out a shuddering breath at how plump and squashy they were :"Like? Babe, I'm in love with your fucking lips. God, just looking at how sexy your lips are is driving me crazy."

'And your attention is driving me crazy.' Miquella let out a low moan, making Alistair groan as the golden femboy palmed his growing erection :"Then how about I let you enjoy them, my beloved~?" Causing the Tarnished's eyes to widen as he descended to his knees.