I woke up on the wrong bed!
If you're guessing that I destroyed a girl's purity and am currently balls deep inside her, then you my friend are known as Captain Obvious! If you think I am currently impregnating Murayama, then you are not as clever as I am. Ha-ha! So while I lay here in heaven let me fully recall what I did when I blacked out and made poor life choices and broke a few bro codes..............Scooby-Doo flashback.............
After releasing Murayama from my deep throat examination, I just look deep into her eyes and say,"Murayama are you my wife from my past life?" I am currently holding her in my arms while every one in the studio is speechless at my bold as fuck behavior.........
Murayama, in her excitement of kissing her crush in front of everyone, just rolls with the mood and does not take my question as a truth but rather that I am just flirting, so she just nods and says,"I am, and I always will be........" I of course just think Big G sent my wife to me in a no memory form, and my inner drunk happiness just went from zero to sixty in one second.....So I just smiled and made out with her right there.......Yup there was some confusion in the room, then Asia jumps up and turns my head and joins in the chaos,"Me too!" Then she pulls my face for a kiss too!
I then pull both girls to the couch and say..."Aika and Saji you guys are up singing well ha-ha.....My wives and I will just enjoy it!" Damn drunk me is nuts!
Both Asia and Murayama just looked like two pure girls ready to be devoured by a big bad wolf.......The smile both had made drunk me even more happy! However, Drunk me was not done yet...No, there are so many fun things I can do right here in this place alone...The possibilities are endless!!!!
I excuse myself from the two blushing messes at my sides and close in on Kiba and put my arm around his shoulder and whisper into his ears..."Kiba if you trust me....I will tell you an important world shaking secret.....Your child named Trunks, will end up saving the underworld from a God class being that goes around collecting planets to sell to other races.....This mighty God is called Freeza......If your fated child is not born with love and care.....Not even I will be able to save us...Trunks is one of the mightiest sword users that ever lived! I know this is hard to believe....But have I ever led you wrong before?!" With a super convincing face...both Kiba and I were screwed at that moment, why?
First Kiba bought my Dragon Ball bullshit......Second while I was whispering into Kiba's ear Aika took a convincing, Boys Love moment between me and Kiba, like I was picking up a poor innocent girl at a bar......FUCK DRUNK ME! Akeno you're good!
"OK Matsuda, I will do anything I can just say the word!" Com-on bro I trick you all the time don't fall for it!!!!!!!
I turn his head to face Katase and say,"She is the hope for us all, your child brought up with love and sword training will save us! Your mission is to make her your girlfriend and impregnate her! Do your best to love her!....The more love you two have the stronger the future hero will be.....Then your son Trunks will be able to fight alongside my daughter Sera and push back the invaders! So our kids will save the Underworld!" Damn I think in all Universes and worlds, Katase has never had this happy ending right?
Kiba just takes a deep breath then stands up, walks to Katase and says,"Would you join me for a love duet?" Fuck I think I heard her panties explode!
So I go back to my angels and pull Murayama into my lap....and yes drunk me does not care about that stiff brother, is poking the bear on her panties.....No really drunk me is a bastard!
I just whisper in her ears,"Will you be mine forever Murayama?" She just blushes super red and shakes her head yes...not sure what she should do about that lap snake trying to find a nice home! While the two future love birds are singing and Asia is chatting with Yura....I look to Motohama who just got the chills and say,"Issei told me he loaned you his boy's love collection last year. Did you ever give it back?" Yura, Aika, Asia, and Saji all looked at Motohama in surprise, and thanks to what drunk me did in the past the look of guilt in his face was EPIC! And if you're wondering why Murayama did not notice anything, that would be because drunk me currently has his damn hands on her thighs! Bad Hand!!!!!
"W-what a-are y-you talking about....I do not have Issei's boys love books!!!!!" The jury found your face guilty! Saji just moved further away from Motohama, but Aika just said,"Boyfriend, why are you holding out on me?" My work on killing my friends is done here ha-ha!
"Oh Saji, can you come with me to the Student Counsel's house after this, I need your help with something....I think Sona is going to declare her new love!", Saji's danger alarm went off at full tilt! And he also felt a bit excited.....After all, he is in love with his King! Poor guy, drunk me is ruthless!
By this time the new lovebirds were done doing a few songs in a row and Asia was excitedly talking about cosplay.....I told Murayama,"My love, why not spend time with your sister Asia and go do cosplay...and take some pictures for me.....I will reward you nicely any way you want!" She then asks Aika if she can join them and Aika was super excited and said,"I have lots of new costumes to put on you although some might be tight in the bust."
The night at the lounge ended around 8:00 pm, and I said my goodbyes to Asia and Murayama and while no one was looking I ended up kissing both girls again....Then Saji and I went to Sona's house......Did I call to let them know I was coming.......Nope, drunk me can not operate a phone in this mode!
I stagger to the front door and knock, then the door opens and Tsubaki is there. She of course noticed I was three sheets to the wind and just giggled. She also noticed a very confused Saji standing a ways back looking like he will get in trouble standing next to me. I say can you ask the lady of the house to come to the doorstep my dear....hick!
Soon a very confused Sona noticed what her Queen did and asked,"Matsuda and Saji, may I ask what the both of you are doing here?" She did not mind me but I am sure she was confused about Saji's presence.
I pull out a ring I made for Sona and dropped to one knee at her feet and said,"Sona my most beautiful Underworld flower, how I have longed for you in my heart.....My soul is hungry for your company...And I Matsuda Tanaka ask for your hand in marriage......If you turn me away I will never bother you again! But if my love were to say yes, I shall make a beautiful family with you my love!" At the look of shock on Saji's face, both Sona and Tsubaki knew what drunk me was doing and Tsubaki held in her giggle...well she tried...Sona just looked at the ring and smiled thinking 'So his true feelings come out when he drinks, I am soooooo happy!' and Sona just holds out her left hand and says,"I am moved by your proposal, so I shall accept your token of love! Yes I shall marry you my love!" Sona then picks me up and gives me her second kiss for Saji to witness.
"Thanks Saji I will see you on Monday.....I was afraid of getting attacked in the streets...your a hero in my book.....I then grab the waist of my two fiances and walk in and close the door.......The door camera captured a twenty minute video of a man crying in the street!"
Inside, I was smiling from ear to ear and said,"Tsubaki I am homeless for the night. Can I sleep in your bed tonight? And my love Sona anytime you want me I am yours!" Sona just rolls her eyes knowing I am wasted but she said,"Tsubaki I made you wait to be with your man long enough, now that he is mine too, you can do as you like with him......" Sona knows the only reason Tsubaki has not claimed me yet was because she was waiting for her King....Now Tsubaki looks like a puppy that got a giant bone to devour....and for the first time drunk me had a bit of fear enter his mind....too late he was already captured.
Tsubaki just smiled at her King and pulled my arm fast to her room and threw me on the bed.......When did her clothes come off? "Tsubaki my love please be gentle! And I love you!"
That night was one to remember......Akeno is the forward acting girl that is passionate in bed....Tsubaki is the calm and composed girl......That is a freak in the sheets! No seriously she is tied with Kala for being forceful.....I realized her Queen strength was no joke vs drunk me.....She was super aggressive and I loved every second of that long ass night. If there was a BGM going it would have been the [Lone Ranger] theme!.........And that my friends is how I ended up in the wrong bed with the wrong girl.....and it was great!