Dog of War

Camila nearly exploded on the spot. She could feel her core about to burst and scatter itself to the stars. Her every flower bloomed anew, as her vines curled and wiggled with a tangle of love, joy, and seeing the single cutest thing she had ever seen. Hearing Princess say that for the first time would have been enough to make her squeal, but she just had to be adorable about it too! She wasn't even on any Class D either, she did that entirely of her own volition!

 

Oh dirt how she wanted to sweep her up and drug her into a blissful stupor and lavish her with pets and kisses. Ugh, if only she didn't have therapy today! She couldn't miss it either, it was a critical component of the plan! Tomorrow, once she was hers, Camila would give her everything she was due and more. For now, she'd have to settle for just a infinitesimal fraction of what Princess truly deserved.

 

A vine brushed through her hair as Camila used the one she nuzzled to reach down to her chin and tilt her head up. “That means more to me than you know, little one.” Princess didn't respond, not with words.

 

The look in her eyes told Camila all she needed.

 

Camila savored the moment before she finally broke eye contact, giving her a small head pat. “Let's finish getting you ready.”

 

“R-right.” Princess mumbled, trying poorly to hide her blush as she fidgeted with her bear’s paw. Stars, she was cute when embarrassed.

 

Camila brought out the shoes- black leather, a heart shaped buckle that went over the foot and one for around the ankle, sporting a low three centimeter block heel. She had ended up choosing the corset to match it after some deliberation. She had doubts about putting black on Princess, but it wound up being perfect. It made the lighter colors stand out more, and tied it all together.

 

Princess eyed them curiously, likely sizing them in comparison to her boots. A tap on each leg was all it took to get her into them, and Camila locked each buckle to its inward most notch. The girl tested her footing, alternating between twisting on the balls and heel of each shoe. Camila watched closely, taking in her biorhythm, anxiously searching for any sign of her mood turning from curiosity to displeasure.

 

Princess took a few steps, span around, and came back, stopping in front of Camila with a satisfied ‘hm.’ “These are.... not bad. We would prefer laces and better support, but they are acceptable.”

 

Relief robbed Camila’s vines of tension. That was about as well as she let herself hope for. “I'll make sure you have something nice for tomorrow.” She proffered a vine. “Are you ready to leave?”

 

Princess accepted it. “Yeah.”

 

Camila led her out into the living room, where Jess was finishing up. Pinks and purples accompanied the whirring of her vacuum. “Jess?”

 

“Sjgskgs!” Jess’s vacuum shut off, yellow joining the cycle of colors. “M-Miss Verdun! I didn't notice you come in! I'm already done I was just, uh, double checking!”

 

Camila fought off the urge to giggle. “I just wanted to let you know Princess and I were leaving now.”

 

“Oh, okay! I'll be working on those designs! I think I have them pretty much figured out already.”

 

“Wonderful!” Camila could hardly wait to see what she came up with.

 

Princess suddenly let go of her vine and made her way over to Jess. “One second, Miss!” Was she-? she was! Camila let out a squee as Princess kneeled down to hug the robot. “Bye Jess!”

 

“Hkdkgafjzhksgj! B-bye Princess!”

 

Princess practically skipped on the way back, taking her vine again. “Okay, we're ready now.”

 

Camila couldn't help but give her a scritch, having to contain herself once again as her pet pressed into it with a sigh. “Let's head out, then.”

 

The local star was burning away the remains of the overcast as they stepped outside. Camila gave Princess a comforting touch, sensing the poor girl’s nervousness. Letting her stay inside hadn't given her much opportunity to be comfortable as herself around strangers. The girl  calmed down with that, moving to her side and staying there even as Camila led her on. She matched the set pace almost immediately, only getting a few steps ahead at the start before returning to her side.

 

The walk down to Acaulescent’s office was short but lovely. The traffic outside of the hab was practically non-existent. However, as they made their way onto the main streets it livened considerably. Sophonts excitedly flitting to and fro, getting the final preparations in for the festival tomorrow. Festival goers scoping out the booths to better plan out the day. A number of Affini overseeing the commotion, one of whom was accosting a Terran about not taking her hourly break. Meanwhile other Affini were walking their florets, enjoying the final traces of crisp morning air, or simply cooing over the sheer number of adorable sophonts.

 

Princess stuck closely to Camila, but seemed to be doing fine in the crowd. She actually seemed to be doing better, once it became clear that no one was really paying attention to her. A good sign, given that tomorrow would be far busier. Very few sophonts did little more than glance their way. To them, they were just another Affini-Floret pair out for a walk, and there were far more remarkable things happening than a shy girl in a cute dress. The few gazes that did linger gave a friendly wave, and Camila had to signal to the odd approaching Affini that Princess wasn't available for petting at the time.

 

The door to the office jingled as they pressed inside, and Acaulescent called out from the back. “Ah, be right there!”

 

Camila took the opportunity to give Princess one last set of scritches, which the girl savored as much as she did. “I'll be just outside if you need me, okay? Even if you just want me there for comfort.”

 

Princess placed her hand on a vine brushing her cheek. “We should be alright, but if we aren't, we'll call for you.”

 

Acaulescent exited her office to greet them both. “Princess, it's good to see you again!” She beamed as she took Camila's vines in her own. “You as well, Camila.”

 

“Good morning, Miss Nele.”

 

“Are you ready to start? I've already put on some tea if you’d like it.”

 

Princess took a breath and smiled. “Yes, and some tea sounds lovely.”

 

“Wonderful. If you'll follow me into my office-” On that note, Acaulescent and Princess left Camila in the lounge.

 

Camila wished she had snuck in a few more pets as she picked out a place to sit. She settled on the same large chair with a view of the ocean, watching the florets play and imagining herself out there with Princess.

 

Soon enough.

 

 

-_-_-_-

 

 

Princess clung to Mr Bear as they followed Miss Nele inside. The office was as cozy as they remembered it, perhaps more so now that it had a degree of familiarity, but there was a strange off feeling that sat on them, alleviated somewhat by Mr Bear. Luckily there was already a cup with fresh tea in it sitting on the tray near the chair. They took a moment to seat themselves and position the teddy in their lap before taking a sip. The flavors were as subtle, layered and delicious as they recalled.

 

We should ask Miss to make us some again sometime.

 

Thoughts of Miss and the potential berry flavored tea she might make brought a smile to their face, that off feeling lifting just a bit. Maybe after this? They had been a good girl, and good girls got treats.

 

“So,” Miss Nele started, bringing out her pad and getting their attention. “Miss Verdun has kept me updated on your progress and well being, but I thought we could start with going over how you've been since our last session.”

 

Since last session? Stars, the three days had felt more eventful than the last three years. “Good, we think? A whole bunch of stuff happened.” Princess took another sip from the cup as they ran through the events in their head. A lot of it was easily the best moments of their life, but other parts... They weren’t ready to talk about those just yet. They spent some time recounting minutiae to Miss Nele, who asked follow-up questions in the manner of one speaking to a respected colleague in a prestigious field of study.

 

“This isn't a report Princess, you don't have to mention everything, just whatever sticks out to you.”

 

Princess sighed. Talking helped a lot last time, hopefully it would help them out again. “We talked with Miss after we left, like you suggested, and that went really well. We even signed a partial contract that said she couldn't make us wear a collar. We also asked her to make us believe we're safe, and that helped a lot too. It did take a bit of hypnosis, but, uhm, i-it's really nice.” It was still strange to think about how safe they finally were.

 

“I imagine so! Does it bother you that you were hypnotized for that though? In contrast to reaching that point yourself. ”

 

Princess blinked, caught a bit of guard. They hadn't really... thought about it like that? They had needed the help. Even if it had taken some brainwashing, they couldn't bring themselves to regret it. Besides, Princesses rely on others. “No. We were just so tired of being scared all the time. We're not sure we even could have done it on our own. We would happily do it again.”

 

Miss Nele quickly made a note. “It takes a lot of strength to admit you need help, Princess. That was a very brave thing to do.”

 

They fidgeted with Mr Bear for a moment, before pushing past it to continue. “The day after was pretty good until it wasn't. Miss had left us at the hab as per our request and we kinda... ate a synthcube and threw up everywhere.” They shuddered as they recalled the taste.

 

Miss Nele looked aghast. “Goodness!”

 

“It was awful.” Princess took another sip of the tea, they could already feel it starting to ease their worries. “It didn't help that we messed up the next time she left us alone, either. The day did turn around after Miss got back though. She helped us get cleaned up and then Daisy came over and- oh! We're dating Daisy now, that happened then!” The memory brought with it an irresistible smile. Miss Nele took a few notes and motioned for them to continue.

 

“We had a really nice night together and kissed a bunch, and then yesterday we, uh, had sex with her for the first time?” Princess cleared their throat, feeling flushed at the memory. “It was also just our first time in general, but it was really good.”

 

“That’s wonderful! It shows a lot of growth that you feel comfortable enough here to allow yourself to be vulnerable.” There was an odd feeling in the back of their head, like they had forgotten something. “Now, you said you also messed up the other time she left you alone. I'm told there was an incident with Jess, and that she became aware, is that what you were referring to?”

 

Princess flinched, using both arms to press Mr Bear to them like a protective vest as they nodded. “We, uhm, said some really mean things and made her cry.”

 

“It's alright, Princess, I'm not here to judge you. I understand Miss Verdun already helped you but I thought you might want to talk about what happened?”

 

It probably was a good idea. Miss may have gotten rid of the sharp edges, but there were still a few sore spots left. Where did they even begin?

 

Why we snapped?

 

As good a place as any. “It was-” Princess took a few breaths, then steadily drained the remaining half cup of tea. They set the cup back down with a sigh, waiting for its effects to take hold. “We were scared, annoyed, frustrated, and projecting a bit. Okay, we were projecting a lot, actually. It's not that having to disassemble AIs under a very real threat of physical harm doesn't play a role in how we felt about them, but more than that they reminded us of us.” Even with the xenodrugs, the events from yesterday still soured their gut.

 

Miss Nele poured them another cup of tea. “It’s common for self-hatred to be projected outwards in a number of ways, and being able to recognize and move past it is good. I would be interested in hearing how they reminded you of yourselves.”

 

“Depends.” Princess shrugged. “The ones that are still fancy machines make us think of how we were at the Company. Complacent, unwilling and unable to  challenge their place. Merely existing to fulfill their purpose.” Even the sweetness of the tea couldn't cover the bitter taste of the words. “The ones that are-” rogue “aware make us think about all the ways we failed to grow past our own programming until it was too late, and how everyone died. Both of them just remind us that we were made to be a tool for violence, and we resent that.”

 

Miss Nele hummed as she tapped away at her pad. “That's a very interesting sentiment, Princess. Can I ask why you stayed a mercenary after The Company collapsed? It seems like you wouldn't want anything to do with it after what happened.”

 

Princess thought it over another sip of tea. Sure it paid well, and was easy for them, but someone of their skill level could have taken a much cushier job. They could have been an advisor. They could have been the personal attack dog of any number of tyrants or wealthy people. They could have avoided jobs with AI and enhanced soldiers, but they had sought them out. It all kept coming back to one thing, at the center of it all. “Miss Nele are you, perhaps, familiar with Sun Tzu?”

 

Something the Affini shifted. It wasn't the confused apprehension of the Captain, but the excitement of a scholar. “Why, yes! I read The Art of War as part of my Terran psychology studies. It offered some very intriguing insight to your species. In fact, after Miss Verdun noted it held personal significance to you, I reread it in several languages in various editions with Terran annotations.”

 

Princess couldn't help but smile. “Yes, he writes a lot on some very foundational concepts of warfare. Most of which are considered basic or common knowledge by today's standards, but in the Warring States period of the Zhou era he was centuries ahead of his time. On some level, we were enamored by the just the premise alone- that warfare is an art. More than that, we were fascinated by his concept of ‘supreme excellence.’ That one could master the art to the degree that they barely have to fight at all, that doing so results in minimum casualties... It was an intoxicating idea. We thought that if we could attain such a level of mastery, that if we could become supremely excellent, we would be more than just a tool or a dog. We studied the art with a fervor, reading every text about it from Clausewitz and Strechan to Feldman and Zhang. We didn't limit ourselves to just strategy either, we studied the history of war as well. We could tell you about any major recorded conflict from the time of the Macedonians to the modern era. Our knowledge surpasses that of likely every Admiral. The Company may have made us a weapon, but we made ourselves an artist.”

 

Princess winced as they recalled the nature of their supposed ‘art.’ The dragged up memories sickening them to the core. All those sophonts... how could that be art? “Well, that was the idea at the time. Looking back on it now... We were just making excuses. After a while it was just what we did. We didn't want to question it, we just wanted to tell ourselves that we were doing something else than being a slave to our nature. Thirty two years outside of the company and we never once bothered to actually grow.”

 

“I don't think that's true at all.” Miss Nele broke her silence, and their moping. “You had numerous severe disadvantages at the onset compared even to other Terrans in the Accord, and had to try to overcome them in an environment extremely hostile to recovery. I bet you before you came into the Compact would be unrecognizable to yourself from The Company, or even ten years after the Company to then. You may not have been able to move on entirely until now, but that doesn't mean you didn't make progress. I think it's admirable what you were able to accomplish by yourself! You shouldn't diminish your personal achievements like that.”

 

“Oh, uhm, thanks?” They did have to do a lot of work just to be able to function in the Accord. The Company didn't exactly teach them how to socialize or act in public. They wouldn't have even taught them how to read if they didn't need them to.

 

“You are quite welcome! Although, I would like to note that's not what ‘Supreme Excellence’ is.”

 

Princess blinked. “Huh?”

 

“‘Minimizing casualties.’ That's not what ‘Supreme Excellence’ is.” Miss Nele clarified. “‘Supreme Excellence’ comes from victory without fighting at all. The point of that statement was that war is to be avoided at all costs. Even with no casualties, fighting at all is automatically a ‘failure.’”

 

Princess fought the urge to roll their eyes. “We know that. It was only aspirational, but armed conflict was the main industry of the Accord. It was unavoidable. Even the rebels and aspirational revolutionaries engaged in it. In fact, warfare has been the industry that drives all others for centuries, arguably even millennia of Terran history.” They picked up the cup, using it to further drive their point. “Even this has a long and bloody history for our species. Tea has been an inciting factor from the opium wars to the United States’ revolution.” They punctuated the statement with a sip. “True Supreme Excellence is unobtainable.”

 

“Well the Compact doesn't have any wars, nor do we ever permit violence as conflict resolution.” Miss Nele stated, before suddenly brightening. “In fact, I'd say you've finally accomplished your goal!”

 

Princess huffed. “We find that hard to believe.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“Miss Nele, we literally were involved in the war for this planet.”

 

“Domestication campaigns are not wars.” Princess was taken back. It was the first time they had ever heard anything resembling a harsh tone from the Affini, even if it was at worst the tone a teacher takes when correcting a student. “You may fight, scream, run or hide, but we are not engaging in warfare. We use no weapons and we certainly do not kill. Every single sophont is counted and cared for, and every single loss is mourned. I do not know any Affini that wouldn't give their own life if it would save even one sophont.”

 

Nonsensical propaganda.

 

“Even if you aren't trying to use violence, that doesn't mean it isn't violence. We can personally vouch that intentions don't account for much. Making people into pets against their will is still a kind of warfare. The Compact lacks violent conflict internally, and only because there are infinite resources.”

 

Miss Nele deflated ever so slightly. “You’ve touched upon a gnarl of very ancient arguments there, one too challenging even for most Affini.  Even so-” She perked right back up. “You seem to have made excellent progress since our last visit. If you keep this up, I think you'll have a chance at being declared independent at your trial!”

 

Trial?

 

Recognition followed confusion, succeeded by faint worry. How had they forgotten about leaving? Oh, stars, why did the thought of leaving hurt? “R-right...”  They couldn't stay though, could they? Sure every moment with Miss was wonderful and Daisy was here but wouldn't that mean becoming a pet? They couldn't be property again! They couldn't think about life without them either. “That's- uhm.” They couldn't bring themselves to say ‘good.’

 

“Princess? Are you alright?”

 

They swallowed, the dryness of their mouth stuck to their throat. “D-do we have to leave? If we're independent we can stay, right? A-and not be a pet?”

 

Miss Nele stopped typing, setting her pad aside. “Technically? Yes. I know of a few independents who have a relationship with an Affini more like roommates than a pet and owner. Some even live with an Affini and their florets, subbing in as an owner on occasion. However, if I am to be honest, I don't think that will happen in your case.”

 

“W-why not?!” Even the dulled panic was starting to compress their chest. “You just said we could be declared independent!”

 

“I did, and I do believe you've shown a lot of the growth necessary for that.”

 

“Then why?” Princess’ voice was quiet, barely above a whisper. Hadn't they done what they were asked? Hadn't they been good girls?

 

Miss Nele offered Princess her tea. They accepted the cup, eagerly drinking as politely as they could. They finished the cup with a sigh, and set the cup down.

 

“Princess, why do you want to be independent?”

 

They cocked their head, taken off guard by the question. “We don't want to be property?”

 

The Affini shook her head. “That's a different question. Why do you want to be independent? Do you have a goal that matters to you?  Something you want to do, or create, or become?”

 

“Uhm, N-none of the other soldiers from the company ever got the chance to be independent, so-”

 

“Again, that's not what I'm asking. This is your life, not theirs. If it could be proven that every single one of those soldiers would have volunteered to become florets, you would still deserve the chance to say no. I'm asking why you want to be independent.”

 

Why... Why... “Because... Because you're supposed to, aren't you? We can't just- just-” They didn't want to be property, but that's not wanting to be independent. If it weren't for that caveat, would they even care? Princess relied on others, didn't they? “We're not sure?”

 

Why do we want it? Because we were told to want it?

 

“That's alright. Take a moment to breathe, and then I’d like to ask a different question. Why do you want to stay with Miss Verdun?”

 

“She's wonderful.” The words flowed easily. “The way she carries us, the way she feeds us, the way she pets us, even just being in the same room as her- it's all wonderful. Everyday since we came here has been the best day of our lives. We had never actually been happy until we came here.” Tears welled up from the bottom of their heart as Princess continued. “Plus she's helped us so much! She helped us figure out we're trans and learn about plurality and- and we love her, Daisy too! And we still need to actually hang out with Jess, and-!” The point of the exercise hit Princess with all the sudden force of a kinetic bombardment. “Ah.”

 

We don't care about independence, we want Her.

 

“I think that's a good note to end today's session.” Miss Nele stood up, offering a kind smile. “I do encourage you two to think about what we discussed today some more, and what it is you actually want. Now, before we go back out there, would you like some counteragent for the tea?”

 

Princess thought about it before they nodded. They felt the prick a moment later.

 

 

-_-_-_-

 

 

Camila was watching a cat floret play in the gentle waves, idly wondering how exactly their Affini went about drying all that fur when she heard the door open. She immediately rose out of her chair, turning to see Princess walking out, her bear clutched to her chest. There was something shifted in rhythm, subtle but definitely there. Acaulescent had worked another miracle; she'd be ready tomorrow. “Hello, Princess.”

 

“H-hi Miss.” The girl mumbled, hiding in her plushie. Stars, she could hardly be more precious.

 

“Princess did very well today, I'm looking forward to our next session. Feel free to let me know when she's available.”

 

Camila would have to see about sending Acaulescent a gift in the near future. “Of course, I'll probably let you know after the flower festival.” The other Affini gave them a parting touch, before disappearing back into her office.

 

Camila could hear Princess’ heart rate tick up as they were left alone. A small scritch where her neck met her skull was all it took to get her to relax. “So, Princess,” she brushed a vine against her cheek. “Are you feeling ready for your walk?”

 

“Yeah,” Princess sighed as she nuzzled into the touch, placing her hand over the vine. “A walk sounds nice.”