Discordant Note | TBATE

Toren Daen

I watched Naereni go, a complicated mix of feelings settling in me. From what I could gather, Karsien knew about Blood Joan's drug-mixing operations and had for some time. The fact that he was taking steps without Naereni's knowledge, and utilizing Wade's help, must have felt like a massive betrayal.

She was supposed to be his second in command, after all.

I looked at the Rat up and down, a new understanding finally clicking into place in my mind, like the final piece of a complicated puzzle. The picture it formed was now crystal clear, obvious with the last little segment.

"So that's why you recruited me," I said wonderingly. "You wanted a weapon to point at Blood Joan. A knife with which to sever the corruption from the healthy flesh. Not a thief. A warrior."

It made sense. If Karsien had been making plans and gathering information against Blood Joan and this operation for the past few months, then bringing me on, a mage who had a blood vendetta against them, was a wise choice.

I felt a bit of anger at that. I wasn't just a weapon to be pointed at something Karsien wanted destroyed; a tool of his machinations. Another part of me felt resignation. I had signed up for this, knowing the man had deeper motives. And even better, those motives matched my own. I knew mages were weapons, regardless of what they wanted.

Karsien narrowed his attention on me, his stance more rigid than before. The conversation with Naereni had affected him, but I didn't know the man well enough to tell how. "No, not sever corruption from healthy flesh, Toren," he said, more bite in his tone than he used with his protege. "Blood Joan isn't a wound that can just be excised. They are a limb that needs amputation. You were a surgeon's assistant once, weren't you? You understand this."

The bitterness in his voice surprised me. It was something I recognized well; an anger that resonated deep within. Blood Joan had hurt Karsien somehow. The look in his eyes was personal.

Before I could latch onto that familiarity, the storm dampened, then vanished back into Karsien's relaxed posture. He seemed to shed the effects of the conversation, his confident and guile-filled air returning like water filling in a breach. "But that doesn't matter to you, does it Toren? You'll get what you want sooner or later." A pause. "Congratulations on your first heist, by the way. I hope you made a good impression on any who saw you."

I nodded. "Thanks," I said, even more unsure about the man in front of me than ever before.

Karsien waved at me with a dismissive hand. "I'll call you back here shortly. There's something I want to talk to you about later."

Understanding the dismissal, I shuffled to leave, catching the look on Hofal's face before I went to my room.

He looked sad, a mournful look stretched across his features. He seemed far older with that expression. It was something about how his wrinkles deepened, and shadows coated his brow.

"Thank you for helping me back there," I whispered under my breath. "I don't know what I might have done if you hadn't stopped me."

Lady Dawn hovered at my side, the familiar darkening of shades and colors beckoning her arrival. "Your actions were wiser than they may have been, Contractor," she said, sending a glance behind me to Karsien. "I have another note of advice if you are inclined to take it." Her arms were folded neatly over her stomach, the picture of poise.

When Naereni had told me about what Blood Joan was doing, a familiar anger swallowed my thoughts. It wasn't just me that the Blood was hurting, but every broken addict in East Fiachra. I knew what drugs could do to a person; how addiction broke them down.

In my previous life, I knew where the people who enabled such things peddled their wares or wrote false prescriptions. But in that life, I didn't have the power to burn a warehouse to the ground or bring such false men to justice. I couldn't send their supplies to the sky in an explosion of mana and energy. But in Alacrya? I could make that warehouse burn.

Lady Dawn had intervened, citing the risks of such an act. There were people inside, who might be blind to what was being sold. Burning the warehouse could spread fire to the surrounding buildings, causing it to break out of control and cause far more harm and damage than I wanted. And if I wanted to destroy the Joans, I needed to do it methodically, not in a fit of emotional rage.

"I'd like to hear what you have to say," I said at last, reaching my room. The Cistern didn't have a particularly tall ceiling, so I always felt like the rooms were looming down on me. With the narrowed vision and dampened colors of the Unseen layering over it all, that feeling was multiplied.

"This Rat," Lady Dawn said, gliding alongside me as I moved, her phantom form glowing slightly, "Cannot be trusted wholeheartedly. He is a man who keeps his thoughts close to his chest, unwilling to share them with those he needs to. I doubt he will guide to you your goal straightforwardly, if at all."

I contemplated Lady Dawn's words for a moment. "But he does have a grudge against Blood Joan," I replied, feeling conflicted. "I could feel that much. The same as you did when you decided to trust me." I paused. "We have the same goal, don't we? Why would he try and lead me astray?"

"The destination of your journeys may very well be the same spot," Lady Dawn replied as we walked into my room, "But the paths you tread are different. And to take the next step on his road, obstacles can easily be shifted to yours. That does not mean to abandon trust completely, merely be conscious of this man's nature." Lady Dawn looked contemplative. "An alternative may be to grow closer with your other teammates, but maintain a distance with their leader."

"You make a good point about Karsien," I acknowledged, "But what would distancing myself from him like that do to help me along?"

"The man desires to control," Lady Dawn replied. "It is his crutch and his drug. He shows it in the very nature of showmanship, in how he wishes to influence others around him and maintain information. Show him that some of that control may be slipping; that his unwillingness to trust has caused him ill rather than gain. Not too much, however, else he may try to assert his control with an iron grip."

I sighed as I fell down onto my bed. "It doesn't make sense," I mused, thinking back to the night before when Karsien had shown me the good he had done. The intensity in his eyes as he watched Greahd distribute the food felt just as real as the anger I saw today. "Does he want the best for the people around here, or is it vengeance against Blood Joan? He felt genuine last night when he showed me the good the Rats were doing."

Lady Dawn tilted her head. "Motivation is a complicated concept, Contractor. This Karsien may not be driven by just one objective. He may have complementary end goals; one to see his enemies fall, and the other to see his allies prosper. But that does not detract from my earlier statement."

"That's an awfully insightful look into humans from an asuran mind," I said musingly, more to myself than to the phoenix.

"It is engrained," Lady Dawn replied, countering my observation with what could either be obliviousness or apathy.

The moment stilled, then I asked a question that had been tugging at the back of my mind for a while now. "What do you do when you're not gliding over the stones in front of me?" I asked. "Do you just… vanish into my core, or am I just not able to see you?"

Lady Dawn cocked her head, seemingly surprised by my question. "When I appear before you, I simply choose to make myself visible to your eyes," she said, answering that question. "Where before you are blind to the true workings of the world, I allow you to peer a bit deeper for a few minutes at a time," she said.

I furrowed my brows, sitting up from my bed. So it was like the latter. Lady Dawn essentially put the magical equivalent of night-vision goggles over my head, allowing me to detect infrared light. "Wait, does that mean you can just explore on your own? Go off wherever you want for a time?"

The phoenix hesitated. "No, I cannot move far. As I stated before, I am bound to you in more ways than one," she said evasively.

Perhaps it was a bit selfish, but it felt comforting to always know that I could call for Lady Dawn. That thought immediately soured with guilt as I realized the implications of her words. I never gave it much thought before now, but Lady Dawn couldn't leave me. She was probably stuck trailing after me as a ghostly shadow, only able to be seen by a single person. She wasn't clear on the details, but it was a prison nonetheless.

My mouth felt very dry. "You traded one prison for another," I said guiltily, looking at the floor. It was I who initiated the offer for her to grant me power, and it seemed that I still wasn't fully aware of the implications. She escaped her capture by Agrona only to be bound to me, unable to interact with the world or speak to anybody else.

"This is no prison," I heard Lady Dawn say, surprisingly resolute. "I have more freedom here than I enjoyed in an age." She paused. One of her dusky purple hands brushed against her forehead. "And my mind… my mind is my own. My choices are my own. This is no prison."

I struggled to accept her answer. Her bars might be far, far better relative to her previous conditions. But just because the injustices she faced now were minor compared to the past did not make them less injustices. But looking into her simmering eyes, I knew I wouldn't be able to change her mind.

"Is there anything I can do to make it better for you, at least?" I asked hopefully. "It must be awfully boring to just stand around all day, unable to interact with anything."

The asura contemplated this for a second. "It would please me if I could have some reading material," she said slowly. "I do not know what my options are, though. It has been many years since I have been allowed to enjoy a book."

—

And so, a few minutes later I found myself in front of Wade, who looked crestfallen at the recent scuffle he had with Naereni. If I wanted a book from a library, the obvious avenue was talking to the librarian.

I coughed into my fist, drawing Wade's attention. He had been stooped over the table in front of the map of Fiachra, reading over a few papers. 

"Oh, Toren," Wade said, adjusting his glasses. The man was dressed in dark trousers and a light buttoned shirt that was looking very wrinkled. "I didn't notice you there. I hope I didn't ignore you too long."

I spared a glance at Wade's work. It was a smaller map, with certain buildings highlighted in light ink with notes scrawled around them. "You didn't miss me," I said. Peering closer at the map in front of him, I felt a note of curiosity. "What're you working on, exactly? I recognize one of the marked buildings as the one I just helped steal from."

"Ah, this is part of what Karsien had me working on," the young man said with a sigh, running a hand through his hair. "These points are for warehouses that Blood Joan uses to distribute their drugs," the sentry said, gesturing to a few of the dots. "I don't know what Karsien was planning on doing at each of these places, but he had me tracking their locations and movements for a while now."

"I thought the boss man wanted you to keep quiet about that," I replied, remembering Karsien's stern rebuke of his protege.

"There's not much of a point to that now," Wade said bitterly. "Though I don't think there was a good reason in the first place."

I stared at the small map. There were a surprising number of warehouses: at least six that he had identified. "So, is acidbeam paper used in the creation of blithe?" I asked, staring intently at the map.

Wade identified something in my tone, causing him to take his eyes away from the paper. "I think it is. Nobody really knew the origins of blithe here in the slums," he said with a note of understanding. "The drug has been called the hivemother's honey for the longest time, but most people didn't know the origin of that. In more recent months, I've sent my rats to the deeper parts of the Joans' operations, and have discovered concrete proof of it. The secret for its creation has been hoarded closely for years."

It clawed at something deep in me that all the men who died on the acidbeam hornet attack did so at the whims of glorified druglords, looking to get their next product out on the market. But I didn't let the thoughts overwhelm me. I couldn't.

I shook my head, dispelling the thoughts. "I actually wanted to ask you if you could get me a few books from the library," I said, changing the topic. "Seeing as you're a librarian, it probably wouldn't be too hard to sneak out a few extras for me."

Wade sat up straighter at this. "I could do that for you," he acknowledged with a tired smile. "Anything in particular you want?" he asked.

"A few primers on Mana Theory," I said, stating what I wanted for myself. "And are there any nonfiction reads you'd recommend for somebody who hasn't read anything in that genre at all?"

Wade's eyes glittered, pushing away some of the earlier melancholy. "Nonfiction is a bit too broad of a category for me to pick out anything . Do you mean philosophy? Language? Science? History?"

I realized that the phoenix's request of 'anything nonfiction' included half of the genres of reading known to man. I felt the urge to call out to Lady Dawn and ask what she really wanted, but it was a bit late for that.

"Do you have anything on the stars or constellations?" I hedged, taking a gamble at what the phantom asura might appreciate.

I felt even more guilty that Lady Dawn would need to use me as an intermediary for this, as she couldn't interact with the outside world. I was like a jailer to her, as she couldn't ask Wade himself.

Wade seemed to think for a moment. "I can think of a few books on the cosmos. Maybe Aldoreth's Encyclopedia of Stars , then. That has a lot of old folk tales about the stars in it for somebody who wants a good story. But a Catalogue of Constellation's Movement Across Alacrya has more data-backed information." The man looked at me. "Which would you like?"

"Both?"

Wade chuckled to himself. "I'll see what I can get you in a few days, Toren."

I felt thankful for his help on this. "Thanks, Wade," I said with a smile.

"Don't worry about it," he countered, staring back at the papers in front of him. "I've got a lot on my hands right now, though. I don't know when I'll get you those books."

"Are you the only one able to do the work, though?" I asked, looking over the sheets he had. "Can anybody help you with it?"

"Karsien didn't want me going around with this," he replied with a bitter shrug. "Though… you just gave me an idea to fix the mess I'm in," he said, a hopeful smile crossing his face. He gave me another nod as he got back to work.

Lawrent Joan

I was pulled from the depths of my sleep by a forceful pulse of mana at my door. It thundered outward, crashing against me and banishing my dreams to oblivion.

I scrambled upward, lightning jumping to my hands as I fought against the blankets that covered my body. I was smothered by them, and I almost felt like they were trying to strangle me. 

I couldn't see out from them. The cloth pulled at my arms, restricting my mobility. I needed to move!

The spell cloaking my fist burned the cloth around me, causing smoke to billow in the air. Once I was out from under the cloth, I forcefully buried the panic I had been feeling, calming my breathing. I was Lawrent Joan. I did not feel fear from simple bed sheets.

But the cool air was a welcome relief from the smothering heat from under my blankets.

Who dared interrupt my sleep?! I thought, ignoring my embarrassment and shame for my earlier weakness. I despised close spaces. I'll have their head!

My chambers were equipped with everything a noble Blood should have. The decor was exquisite, showing the grand power that Blood Joan wielded. One could feel how solid the furniture was just from looking at it, the hardwood polished to reflectiveness.

I powered on the light artifacts above with the flick of a nearby switch, making me wince as the darkness retreated.

In the reflection of my nightstand, I could see my own bloodshot eyes.

And one of the utter necessities that my room held was a sword kept leaning against my bedside. I grasped it, ready to decapitate the fool who had made me shame myself.

Before I could rise, however, Dornar barged into my room. He sported his usual cocky grin, his stride more fit for a prancing swiftsure horse than a man.

Seeing his confidence made my blood boil. Had he awoken me?

"Explain yourself, Dornar! Tell me why you interrupted my sleep or I'll have you flogged!"

Dornar spared a glance toward my still-smoking blankets, causing my grip on my sheathed sword to tighten.

Did he know?

"Word just in, brother!" he said cheerily. "The Rats robbed the Ilasons' warehouse that held our product."

I thought of all the product that was stored in that warehouse, and all the profit it would make my house. The method for creating blithe was a closely held secret amongst highbloods, but I had won it through my own ingenuity and grit a few years ago from a unique person. 

With the product, Blood Joan's failing prospects had seen meteoric recovery. Where before we were the laughing stock of Fiachra, a one-trick Blood who had decimated their rivals in a lucky slaughter, now those around us whispered my name in the shadows in fear. As they should.

It was dangerous to create blithe in Sehz-Clar: Scythe Seris herself had expressed her displeasure regarding the substance openly. But where everyone else cowed to her whims, I saw a true opportunity. True profit.

And the Rats had stolen all of that profit from me.

Lightning erupted from my hands as I struck out at my nightstand, shattering it into splinters. First they ruined the acidbeam paper retrieval, making it impossible to produce more blithe. Then they took my product for themselves.

"Those unblooded bastards plan to sell it themselves!" I snarled, realizing their plan. If no new blithe was entering production, demand would skyrocket while supply plummeted. Those thieves would make a profit off of my work!

"Thing is, brother, they didn't actually steal the blithe!"

My spell fizzled out as I tried to process my brother's words. "But you said the Rats robbed the Ilasons' warehouse!"

"I never said they stole our product," Dornar chided. "They stole from a safe I rigged. It sent a mana pulse alllll the way over here. I went over and checked, and sure enough, none of your product was touched." My brother grinned. "So you can wipe that scowl off your face. It makes you look terribly ugly. Moreso than usual, at least."

I hissed through gritted teeth. "If they didn't steal the product from us, I don't see the point of waking me in the middle of the night!"

"But I've finally confirmed something about how the Rats are getting their information!" Dornar said cheekily. "And with this, they'll finally succumb to us like the rodents they are."