Crimson Dawn

For the next week Lex avoided his friends. At night, he hauled ore sacks, and for the first time, it felt okay—because it gave him an excuse not to show up at B17. When he ran into Tayus in the maintenance hall, they only talked about work. In the areas of the crater city that were monitored by TC cameras, talking about the resistance was impossible.

The convicts in Orongu had made it through three-quarters of the long night. In two Earth days, Tau Ceti would rise over the southwestern edge of the crater, and the pale, dead sunlight would spill over Orongu. For now, it was pitch black outside. Methane lakes had formed across the crater basin from the Vortex storm, their smooth surfaces reflecting the lightning in the clouds above. The boy sat in the shuttle to the maintenance hall, leaning his forehead against the cold window. His breath fogged up the glass where he exhaled in quiet frustration. His right arm pressed against the rags of another worker. He was dead tired. They all were. The compartment was dim, with only the floor guide lights glowing faintly, and the blinking trackers behind the workers’ ears shimmered in the dark like green gemstones. The convicts slumped in their seats, drowsy and silent, worn out from too little sleep and a too-short, miserable life.

The shuttle arrived at the workshop. The last workers got off, but Lex stayed in his seat. He had fought for three hours of free time and was heading to the next station. The train stopped halfway up the eastern crater wall, on a plateau near an abandoned tunnel. He got off. Not a single light was burning at the station. Somewhere far above him, a glass dome was barely visible in the flickering lightning. As he walked through the moon dust, it almost felt like he was outside. He hooked his thumbs under the straps of his backpack and strolled toward the edge of the plateau. There, he sat next to Tayus on a metal bench.

The boys wore wool jackets against the cold. They gazed down at the lights of the crater settlement, saying nothing. After a while, Lex undid the strap of his backpack, pulled out a thermos, unscrewed the lid and poured some cold miner's piss into the cup. He took a sip and passed the lid to Tayus. He set the thermos down between his feet in the moon dust.

"So many workers down there," Tayus said, holding the cup to his lower lip. "And that’s just a tiny fraction of the whole picture. There are a hundred more colonies and three more moons full of convicts who aren’t even criminals. And who knows what kind of crap is happening on Cetos V. Will there ever be peace, man?"

Lex didn’t answer.

"Makes your head spin, when you really think about it," Tayus said, taking another sip and passing the cup back.

"So, are you with Mori now? I don’t get what’s going on between you two."

"I think so," Tayus said. "I asked her, anyway."

"And that’s all it takes? You ask, and you’re a couple?"

"Only if she says yes. And she did."

Down in Orongu, a train glided silently through the habitats. Lex watched the lit-up windows, glimpsing shadows of workers inside. He followed the train until it disappeared from view.

"I’m not doing it," he said. "I just can’t. I don’t have the guts to join the rebels. I’m not cut out for that kind of life."

For a while, they sat in silence, staring straight ahead. Then, Lex heard Tayus breathe heavily into his scarf. "It’s alright, man,” he said. "Honestly, I didn’t expect anything different."

Lex swirled the rest of the miner's piss in the cup. "You’re not mad?"

Tayus shrugged. "Nah," he said. "Can’t exactly be mad at everyone who doesn’t have the guts to be a rebel."

"Sure."

"Sure."

Lex looked at his friend, then stared into the distance. "There’s something else."

"Then spit it out. Or are you enjoying keeping secrets?"

"Don’t be ridiculous. Of course not. I just … don’t know how to say it yet."

"Just say it like it is."

His heart pounded.

He took a breath, started to speak, but stopped.

"Dude?"

Lex shrugged. "Have you ever thought about what it’d be like to live a completely different life?"

"What do you mean?"

"I don’t know, like, if you were born in the 20th or 21st century on Earth or something. Or if you lived on Vega Prime."

"It’s the same everywhere."

"Yeah, right. What do you know?"

"I know plenty," Tayus said. "People don’t learn from history. They just keep making the same mistakes." He scuffed his feet in the dust. "And even if it’s different somewhere else, that doesn’t change the fact that I’m here. Does it, man? Doesn’t change that my parents were slaves, and my friends are slaves. There’s so much crap here. So much stuff that’s messed up, I don’t even have time to imagine anything else."

Lex swallowed hard. He still couldn’t get rid of the lump in his throat. Then, holding onto Tayus’s words, he just said it straight: "I’m entering the Selection Program."

"What did you say?"

"It starts in three days. It’s in Bancarduu again, like you probably know. In three days, I’ll be out of here."

For a while, Tayus said nothing. Then he shook his head and spat on the ground between his feet. "Hell," he said. "And you’re telling me this now?"

"I wanted to say something earlier. But …"

"Have you told Mori?"

"Not yet."

"That’s a real low blow."

"I don’t want to live here anymore. And I definitely don’t want to die here."

"So you’re just gonna leave Mori and me behind—after we risked our lives for you? Damn it."

"You guys are my only friends."

"We’re nothing. Absolutely nothing if you just bail on us. Would you rat us out too, if it gave you a better shot in the competition?"

"What the hell, man?"

"Answer me."

"Of course not. I’d never rat you out. Not in a hundred years, not even if it guaranteed I could get out of here."

Tayus chewed on his bottom lip, shaking his head ever so slightly.

Lex studied his friend’s serious face, following his distant gaze outside. The valley below was half-lit by the colony’s lights. In the distance, the mining machines smoked. The steel in the factories glowed. The mines inside the crater never slept. Never.

"I told you I was dead for a minute, right? In the pressure suit."

Tayus didn’t respond.

"You know what I saw when I was dead?"

"No."

"Nothing. I saw absolutely nothing. Just darkness all around me. No sense of time. You know what that means? It means there’s no inherited guilt. No heaven. No hell. It means that when we die, there’s just ... nothing. This is the only life we get. And I don’t want to spend it on a prison moon."

"I get it. But you know what the difference is? I don’t want to spend my life here either. But I’d rather spend it here with you guys than anywhere else without you."

"No one’s more important to me than you and Mori."

"Save it. It’s all been said. If you win, you’ll leave. With or without us."

"You’re still all I’ve got."

Tayus shook his head, then stood up from the bench. They looked at each other for a while. Suddenly, Tayus let out a sob. "Well, man, my shift starts soon."

Lex wanted to stop him. But he didn’t. He looked out over the shimmering valley, his vision slowly blurring.

"We probably won’t see each other again. Well ... good luck in the competition and all."

"Yeah, thanks."

"Think about us when you’re in Vega Prime?"

"Dumb question."

"Take care, man."

Lex swallowed and nodded.

When Tayus left on the next shuttle, Lex looked down at the ground and saw, between the footprints his friend left behind, two sparkling tears he’d dropped there. And as if it still meant something, tears also ran down his face, and he angrily buried them in the dust with the tip of his boot.

"Damn it," he muttered.