26. Life in Confinement, Hard Ver. (14)
Life in Confinement, Hard Ver. (14)
Sa Hae-geon, who had prepared braised short ribs and sea urchin seaweed soup for dinner, lightly stopped my hand as I was about to pick up my spoon after saying I would enjoy the meal. Then, he quickly snatched my spoon.
“What’s this? Why are you taking my spoon?”
Instead of answering my bewildered question, Sa Hae-geon scooped up a large spoonful of rice from the bowl in front of me. Then he brought it to my mouth. As I looked at him with a dumbfounded expression, he replied nonchalantly.
“Didn’t you want me to feed you dinner as well?”
“When did I…”
“You said it earlier. That at this rate, I’d end up feeding you dinner too.”
“What? No, that’s not what I meant by that.”
“That’s how I took it. Besides, your right arm belongs to me, doesn’t it? And you’re not left-handed or ambidextrous.”
With those words, Sa Hae-geon gestured with the spoon he was holding. I realized he meant for me to open my mouth and eat, but I didn’t want to. It was too embarrassing, especially when there was nothing preventing me from moving my hands. I shook my head at Sa Hae-geon, who kept gesturing and urging me.
“…It’s not like both my hands are injured, and we’re not even dating, so why are you trying to feed me? I can eat with my left hand if needed.”
However, when I met Sa Hae-geon’s gaze, which had a strange intensity, my lips that were about to say “let’s stop this nonsense and just eat” closed weakly. Sa Hae-geon, seeing my reaction, didn’t bother to speak either. There was no urging to eat the food he was offering.
An awkward atmosphere settled over the dining table. Sa Hae-geon was staring at me as if observing me. I had only stated facts, so why had the situation become so awkward? I hadn’t said anything particularly uncomfortable, but Sa Hae-geon’s face seemed to have stiffened slightly.
‘Did I say something wrong?’
I averted my eyes from Sa Hae-geon, who was still staring at me while holding my spoon, even though quite some time had passed. But that didn’t last long. To appease my stomach, which was crying out for food, I had to act shamelessly. Besides, it was torturous to sit still in front of the delicious-smelling braised short ribs and seaweed soup.
Sa Hae-geon must be feeling the same way. It would be best to quickly resolve this uncomfortable situation.
“Ah, haha. I’m hungry. You must be hungry too, let’s eat quickly. I’ll enjoy the meal.”
Even as I forced a smile and picked up chopsticks with my left hand to put food in my mouth, Sa Hae-geon’s gaze, intensely focused on my face, made me feel like holes were being drilled into my face. Although using chopsticks with my left hand was clumsy as it was my first time, it was better than being fed by Sa Hae-geon.
Sa Hae-geon alternately looked at me, trying to continue eating as if nothing was wrong, and the spoon he was holding, then bowed his head deeply. When I glanced sideways to check, his ears were tinged red.
‘…Could he be feeling dejected about being rejected? Or is this some kind of guilt-tripping tactic?’
Either way, it wasn’t something I needed to worry about too much. I turned my gaze away from Sa Hae-geon, who seemed to be hiding his expression by lowering his head, and started eating in earnest. Every time I chewed on the well-cooked short ribs, which fell off the bone without much effort, I couldn’t help but hum.
It was truly blissful to have such high-quality, well-prepared meals at every mealtime. This was the perfect table setting and environment that any overworked ability user would have dreamed of at least once. Except for Sa Hae-geon’s occasional incomprehensible antics, it was a satisfying confinement environment in many ways.
The day passed uneventfully, apart from having my right arm taken away and almost being fed by Sa Hae-geon because of it, and the sun rose on the next day. After finishing breakfast, I sat on the sofa and leisurely watched TV, leaving Sa Hae-geon to do the dishes.
Perhaps because it was a weekday afternoon, there weren’t many interesting programs no matter which channel I turned to. After mechanically pressing the remote control to change channels for a while, my finger stopped on a channel broadcasting an animation I had enjoyed watching quite a bit in my childhood.
It was an animation that many people liked besides me, as it interestingly dealt with the daily life of characters that were simple but charming. Sa Hae-geon, who had finished washing the dishes, came to the sofa and sat right next to me. I was now too lazy to move to create distance between us, so I just fixed my gaze on the TV without saying anything.
“Hyung, you watch animations too? What’s this? Is it fun?”
“…You don’t know ‘Jjorong’s Clumsy Day’?”
“No. I’ve never heard that name before. Is it famous?”
“You really haven’t heard of Jjorong before?”
“Is it something you like, hyung?”
I was at a loss for words at Sa Hae-geon’s reaction. Although it’s quite an old animation, it’s still very popular, and even elementary school students know Jjorong’s name. How could he not know it unless he had been isolated from society or lived his entire life without electronic devices? It’s a character that even people who haven’t seen the animation would have encountered at least once due to its many brand collaborations…
Should I be grateful that this Sa Hae-geon knows my name and existence? I could only give an awkward smile to Sa Hae-geon, who was looking at me with innocent eyes, unable to say anything.
“Hyung, then you can guide me while we watch Ttorong.”
“It’s not Ttorong, it’s Jjorong…”
“Yes. Pporong.”
“…Right. Whether it’s Ttorong, Jjorong, or Pporong, why would that matter to you… Let’s just do the guiding.”
As soon as I finished speaking, I tried to start radiative guiding, ignoring Sa Hae-geon’s hand that was naturally reaching out. However, as if sensing my intention, Sa Hae-geon grabbed my hand. There had been an awkward atmosphere briefly yesterday, and I didn’t want that to happen again, so I had planned to do radiative guiding as much as possible…
Sa Hae-geon held my right hand and smiled shamelessly.
‘…Whatever. Why should I care? If it gets awkward, then it gets awkward.’
Sa Hae-geon was already a lost cause, so I just needed to make sure I didn’t develop any special feelings for him, right? And even if things became awkward between us, that would be beneficial for me in its own way.
Thinking like that, my uneasy feelings suddenly eased. With a more relaxed mind, I held Sa Hae-geon’s hand and started guiding. Although the wavelengths that had been tangled up over several days of guiding had loosened a lot, Sa Hae-geon’s wavelengths were still excessively concentrated.
As I was gently soothing and spreading those wavelengths with my own, Sa Hae-geon suddenly tightened his grip on my hand. A grip strong enough to make the protruding bones tingle enveloped my entire hand. Slightly raising my gaze to check his face due to this unusual behavior, I saw that it was somewhat stiff. He seemed to be uncomfortable somewhere.
“What’s wrong? Are you uncomfortable somewhere?”
Although I asked out of concern, the answer I received was utterly ridiculous.
“No. I just like holding your hand. I want to hold it often like this from now on.”
Being excessively honest with me was both Sa Hae-geon’s strength and weakness. When our eyes met, Sa Hae-geon smiled brightly. I quietly looked at Sa Hae-geon, feeling the appropriate grip enveloping our joined hands. Forgetting even that we were in the middle of guiding.
How long had I been looking at Sa Hae-geon like that? Suddenly, I felt a weight on my lap as if a large watermelon had been placed there. Without even looking, I could tell that Cream had claimed my lap.
“…Ah. Oh, our Cream is here?”
I used acknowledging Cream as an excuse to look away and resumed guiding. I could feel Sa Hae-geon’s warmth and heartbeat from our joined hands. If I listened carefully, I could even hear his quiet breathing. I sent my wavelengths throughout Sa Hae-geon’s body, consciously and unconsciously aware of him. As if pushing away the stray thoughts trying to invade my mind.
“Hyung, you know.”
Sa Hae-geon called out to me as I was concentrating on guiding, shaking off my thoughts.
“Huh? What?”
“How many people have you guided so far?”
I couldn’t say a word to Sa Hae-geon, who was waiting for an answer with innocent eyes. Whether it’s a center or a guild, a guide belonging to any group wouldn’t keep track of such things, right? Especially when they even go out to support other centers.
“Well, I’ve never counted, so I’m not sure.”
“…Too many to count?”
Sa Hae-geon’s voice asking that was somewhat chilly.
“It’s not that, it’s just that there’s no point in counting. It’s not like I’m a pair guide who only guides one Esper.”
Sa Hae-geon’s face looked displeased after hearing my answer. He stared at me with dissatisfied eyes and mumbled.
“You’re my first.”
“And?”
Is he upset that his first guide isn’t new to guiding like him? I could somewhat understand Sa Hae-geon’s reaction, as there were cases where Espers felt intense possessiveness towards their guide, especially their first guide, if they had high compatibility, even if they didn’t form a pair. In fact, compared to other Espers, his reaction was rather late.
At some point, he had returned to an innocent face as if he had never been displeased. Sa Hae-geon stared at me, who was showing an indifferent reaction, with eyes that closely resembled the color of a deep sea, and replied.
“I’m glad that you’re my first. That’s all.”
I couldn’t help but give a hollow laugh at this statement that could be somewhat misunderstood.