Carnival - A LitRPG Apocalypse

John stood up straight and raised his right hand, cupped upwards and declared in his best Patrick Stewart voice “Alas poor Yorik I knew him well. Zeeg, a puppy of infinite jests but poor socialisation and recall yet of most excellent fancy... yadda yadda... something about slings and arrows... to magic up the dog or not to magic up the dog. That is the question,” he finished in a more normal voice as he failed to recall the Shakespeare he was forced to read all those years ago.

“Well?” asked Evie in the unimpressed voice of someone who had become immune to non sequiturs from her dad.

“Not sure kid. Not sure. The dog is mental. Imagine her with superpowers. What will she do next time we’re out for a walk and she sees a random SFD and decides to go for it?” John was silent for a few moments. “I think I'll take the level. We can magic Zeeg up when we have a better idea of what's coming and a better chance of stopping her from using flying powers, or whatever she gets, to go and hunt down all the Small Fluffy Dogs or whatever madness takes her fancy. Level up!”

Would you like to use one Essence and advance to Level 2? Y/N

“Yes”

Please select from the following options

Ability

Efficiency

Utility

You have selected Efficiency.

New Status:

Level: 2

Name: John Borrows

Ability: Teleportation

Constitution: 100%

Reserves: 76

Guidelines:

Maximum weight: 100kg

Maximum Distance: 1km

Line of sight required

Modifications:

Level 2: How about we split the difference?

You always were a cheapskate. Maximum cost reduction due to efficiency bonus' increased to 99%

“Ok, this is nuts,” John said before making rocks bounce back and forth across the garden. “That took 1.6 reserves for eight teleports. As long as I keep the objects small I can do... um... what 500 teleports from a full tank?” he looked up at the sky and declared, “you know this is mental right?”

Evie ignored her father ranting at the sky. This wasn't the first time it had happened after all. Usually it was on an evening and he'd had a few glasses of wine though, so this was a bit out of character. “Sooo when are you going to take the plunge?”

“What plunge?”

“You know the 'why don't you stop being a baby and become the Nightcrawler you were always meant to be' plunge?”

“I find your lack of respect… disturbing,” said John in a Darth Vader voice, “but par for the course. Fair point... I guess it's one thing to blip rocks about the garden but to blip me about, what if something goes wrong? What if it isn't ‘folding space’ or whatever and I actually create a duplicate in the new location and something goes wrong and the original isn't destroyed and then he decides to hunt me down because of something stupid I did twenty years ago that ruined his life??? What if...”

“Dad, stop, she held up both hands and made 'chill' gestures, "as usual you're overthinking this. I think there is a limiter or override that stops us hurting ourselves with the powers. There is only one way to find out, so man up!” She poked him in a kidney.

John became very serious. “Please promise me you'll be careful experimenting with your ability? 'I think' doesn't mean it is.”

“Ok Dad, sheesh fine but like I said, I don't think we can hurt ourselves with our own powers. Other people? Stuff? Sure we can hurt them but not ourselves.”

“Nevertheless, Sausage, be careful. There's a pinnacle to climb or whatever the crazy system means, and no one will be climbing anything if they fry their own brain or teleport themselves into a wall. Speaking of not doing the latter... Right. Here we go. Maximum effort. No fear. Fear is the mindkiller, the little death that brings total obliteration...”

“Stop reciting the Litany Against Fear and just do it already Dad.”

And for the first time in his life John did something that would eventually become humdrum and routine but this first time was somehow magical and special. This moment in time, crystalised in his memory, would never be forgotten.

Blip.

John appeared two metres up the garden, slipped on a muddy patch and promptly fell on his ass. Truly a memory to cherish.

Combat log:

Previous entry:

Teleport: Self

Successful

Reserve cost: 20

Cost mitigated by the following factors:

More than 50% of Weight Limit – No reduction

Less than 10% of Distance Limit – cost reduced by half

Final Cost: 10 Reserves

John leapt to his feet and unleashed a rather undignified whoop before realising his dressing gown was now covered in mud at the back.

“Crap. Now I have to go get dressed and it isn't even 7 o'clock. This is not what working from home was meant to be like.” He smirked despite the setback as Evie chortled quietly at his expense.

“Real smooth dad! Looks like you crapped yourself”

Returning to the garden after putting his PJs and dressing gown in the washing machine and now attired in jeans, an old t shirt emblazoned with “Summer of 88” and a hoodie, John briefly thanked the gods that the water and power grids hadn't been affected so far. In minutes he was back in the garden blipping from one end to the other occasionally while making it rain rocks at the far end.

ZAP. Another bamboo pole shattered.

“You know Dad, I think we need to test how effective drain is on a living thing. ZAP of DOOM is brutal but I think you are right about it being a special rather than the usual attack.” Evie had a calculating expression on her face.

John disappeared from her left and reappeared on her right. “Awesome,” he said to himself. He was revelling in the power he had been given and becoming increasingly comfortable at moving without moving.

“Hmm? ZAP of DOOM? You might want to work on that. What else have you got? In terms of powers, not terrible names for powers. Maybe you should call it The Frank? After Frank Zappa? Geddit?”

Evie scowled briefly at her Dad. “Boomer music," she scoffed, "you went down like a tower of cards in a gale when I drew on you so stop tempting me to try again. And it cost a lot less reserves. I need something else to try it on.”

“Leave the dog alone! You are not experimenting with possibly harmful magic powers on the puppy,” said John sternly.

“As if I would. I've got a much better target in mind,” she said as her eyes roved across the nearby rooftops. She fixed her gaze on two pigeons and a faint blue light shot from them to Evie. “Take that sky rats!” The pigeons twitched as they dropped off the roof.

2 Harmless Pigeons Killed

Harmless Pigeons yield 0.05 essence

Total Essence gained: 0.1

“Did you really just murder a pair of pigeons in cold blood to test out your power?”

“Hang on... log says yes, they are dead as a parrot what is nailed to the perch, pining for the fjords, etc. etc. I will purge all the sky rats to gain ultimate powah!!! Bwahahaha!” she cackled.

“Dude, I don't know what pigeons ever did to you but I'm not sure this is healthy.”

“Mum calls them sky rats, I'm really not a pigeon-ist. Much. Anyway they deserve it. Flying flea bags. We both got 0.05 essence from each of them and I got their charge. Not much charge in them though. Maybe a bit of a boost to my next Zap and cost was 2 reserves. I bet it gets higher the further away I drain something from. So I've got 100 shots at anything that gets close. I hope we get slow monsters or whatever in the waves," she said with a worried expression on her face.

“You moved us both towards a new level by murdering pigeons?” he asked, slightly horrified and somehow unsurprised at the same time. A very strange form of ambivalence.

“Seems so. Maybe we should take a trip to the abandoned club and farm some essence from baddies whose only way to attack us is giving us fleas or pooping on us? Whatever happens with the wave the stronger we are at the start the better.”

Evie's enthusiasm was starting to take John aback. Evie had played violent games and watched violent films for a couple of years now, probably starting younger than was strictly acceptable but had always seemed like a calm, easy-going sort of kid. She did prefer it when he killed spiders rather than threw them out the window but that was spiders and she was eleven. Perfectly normal? This bloodthirstiness was very unlike her in John’s mind. The problem was that he largely agreed with her plan for a local pigeon genocide.

“I think whatever this is, it's messing with our heads. We need to take a breath. Let’s go grab a drink and spend a few minutes thinking and getting our reserves back before we make a decision, OK?” John rested one hand on her shoulder.

“You're no fun! But fine, just remember tick tock the clock is ticking,” Evie grumped but went inside and got herself a glass of squash, moving to the living room and making sparks jump around her fingers.

“No powers!” John said seriously, coming through having put the kettle on again.

“I think we are missing a trick here kiddo. It's... ten to seven, we have until quarter to nine. If we stop using powers at 08:45 we will have full tanks when whatever will happen, happens, leaving us fifteen minutes knowing what we are facing to fine tune a plan. So we've got an hour and fifty five minutes. Let's take ten to come up with a plan to take us through till we get the notification. Sounds good?”

“Sure Dad. I've been messing about with “Identify” by the way." Evie mentioned as she gestured to the computer sat on the coffee table., adding, "your laptop is worth two full empowered Zaps to me.”

John was not impressed and shook his head, replying, “do not use my laptop battery as a battery. For you I mean, it works as a battery for the laptop only! I don't want to lose my save games, thanks very much. Some of them have hundreds of hours behind them.”

“Nerd, but fine whatever," Evie rolled her eyes. "I don’t know what you see in those 4X games. Give me a shooter any day of the week. Can I drain the house instead?” she asked hopefully.

“Maybe try to pull power from a plug?" John said, pointing to the wall. "Gladys is a nice landlady and I don't want to upset her by letting you melt all the wires in the walls or something,” he said with a gentle smile.

Teamchat:

Evie Borrows: So this is what I got :)

John Borrows: Oh great now you can project emojis into my brain. This will end well.

Evie Borrows: Shut up and look.

Evie Borrows: Combat Log: Evie Borrows used Identify on 3 Bedroom End Terrace. 3 Bedroom End Terrace: a modest 3 bed house in the small market town of Normanby. Market valuation: £286000, connected to - National Grid, making near infinite power available for someone at your level.

“Called it!” said John, once again smug, “as long as the grid’s up, you're demigod tier. The S Class Kiddo. The Stumpy Lightning Slinger, Zeus' More Annoying Ginger Half Pint Female Clone-”

“Shut up Baldy and don't ever say the names I come up with suck again.” she interrupted, “No idea why it felt the need to include the value of the house, but I am beginning to agree that the system is weird. The point I was trying to make, if I could just get a word in edgewise, Dad." She gave him "The Look" before continuing, "is that I can overcharge Zaps no worries as long as I'm a hundred metres from a house but Zap is expensive in reserves at max strength. Even switching between drain and Zap I'm still very glass cannon-ey and won't have much staying power.”

“The ZAP did a number on the bamboo but unless the first wave is bamboo monsters or very vulnerable to electricity, maybe robots or something." John shrugged. "We don't know how much damage you'll be doing. I think drain is your best bet until we know more. It worked on me and the sky rats. Focus on efficiency for the first few levels until you’ve got more reserves?”

“Yeah I can see that. And you are basically a controller aren't you? Something gets too close you can blip it a kilometre away if you have to. I kill, you keep them off us? You can blip stuff into the sky and hope the fall kills it I suppose. Which means flying stuff is your worst match up... Sooo let's go find some flying stuff to fight?”