chapter 40
6. Truce
In a way, it was natural.
Because Kyunghee always wanted me to look only at her.
from acquaintance to friend. From friend to lover. After lovers, it was obvious that it would be a couple.
However, even if they reached the stage of marriage, Kyung-hee would never be able to feel relieved.
As the deer said to the woodcutter in an old fairy tale.
Having chained me mentally, it was time to physically chain me.
And if you physically walked the chain, you will walk socially as well.
Of course, it may not be what I think.
It could have been because Kyung-hee just liked being petted by me for the first time in a while.
But one thing was certain. No, there was no doubt about this.
Kyung-hee wanted to establish a more lewd relationship.
Right now, I’m just wrapping my arms around my waist and laughing, ears pricked up, but no one knew what this would turn out to be.
I really had to be careful not to cross the line.
“Come to think of it, you’ve never eaten budae jjigae, have you?”
“Huh? Of course it’s Siwoo. This is a stimulating food.
“yes?”
“Yes.”
Kyung-hee scooped up the gobong rice and put it in a bowl.
He even brought a ladle and bowl to eat, and smiled.
Then, after pricking her ears, Kyung-hee made a gesture to hold the soju glass and sent her eyes.
It seemed to mean that alcohol could not be missing from spicy and salty food.
When I quietly signaled no with my eyes, Kyung-hee, whose ears went down, wept.
Then he looked at me with pitiful eyes, and I couldn’t refuse firmly.
But seeing the goose bumps on my back, I thought I’d have to say no here.
“You need to take your medicine.”
“ah.”
“Can’t we drink for a while? If the doctor says it’s OK, let’s drink together.”
“yes………….”
Kyunghee, whose ears went down, nodded sullenly.
Then, as if he wasn’t going to give up, he secretly gave me a sly look and smiled naturally.
All of a sudden, my ears went up and I was smiling.
I ate budaejjigae as if nothing was wrong, thinking that somehow my anxiety was getting worse.
The bagel stew was very tasty. The seasoning is good, and the ingredients hold the soup well.
Thinking that it was as delicious as selling it, I quickly emptied the ingredients.
However, something was still lacking, so I had no choice but to take out the ramen.
Kyeong-hee was staring at the pot as if she were hungry too, so it seemed like it would be okay to boil it.
It would be nice to buy ramen noodles later. Because it is inconvenient to do soup.
There is a limit to what you can use for cooking, so it would be better to buy ramen noodles next time.
So I put my thoughts together and started cooking.
Kyung-hee was hugging me from behind.
“Why, Kyunghee?”
“No. Are you uncomfortable?”
“No, it’s not uncomfortable.”
“…………”
It was okay because there was nothing to cook anyway.
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Just add soup, add ramen and boil it, and that’s it.
However, Kyung-hee’s reaction was strange, so I was uneasy.
He was holding my collar and rubbing my cheeks as if he was a little sad, I wondered if this had ever happened.
No, I don’t think there was. no, there wasn’t
When Kyunghee hugged me, she always held me with her palms open.
There was no such thing as pulling the collar like now.
“Siwoo.”
“yes?”
“no.”
“Don’t play around.”
“No. Ugh…”
“……………………………”
“I’ll eat and go to sleep.”
“yes.”
After removing her hand from me, Kyunghee touched my right shoulder.
Then, after tidying up the droopy ears, he sat down at the table.
I finished cooking, ignoring the stares staring at me from behind, and walked to the table.
Kyunghee looked at me the entire time I ate.
I wasn’t watching to adjust my pace as usual.
So, I was like a child contemplating whether to eat or not.
It was like blinking your eyes while looking at the marshmallow in your hand.
………… Under the circumstances, the marshmallow was most likely me.
I thought I shouldn’t come home for a while.
Anyway, as written on the paper, I needed time to distance myself from Kyunghee.
I just had to study, and I thought I could just study at the study cafe I went to the other day.
“It’s Kyunghee.”
“yes?”
“I’m thinking of studying somewhere other than my own room for the time being.”
“why!?”
“There’s not much time left before the exam.”
“It is, but…”
Kyung Hee put on a gloomy expression.
I understood it in my head, but it seemed that I didn’t want to leave even for a moment.
I’m glad you understood.
I expected to raise my voice saying that I didn’t want to fall.
Something was ominous, but it seemed like it would work out for now.
So the two of us ate budae stew, washed the dishes, and went into the room.
Kyung-hee said that it would be better to go to bed early while eating, so I saw her just brushing her teeth and lying down in the living room right away.
I said it was okay to sleep in the bed, but Kyunghee shook her head.
I said I didn’t want to interfere with my studies, so I couldn’t ask more.
So after I brushed my teeth, I went into my room and locked the door.
And the video lecture was turned on so that the sound leaked out slightly.
It was because he wanted to prevent Kyung-hee from sleeping and overhearing the sound.
But honestly, I wondered if that was really the case.
Now I’m trying to improve, but it’s because I don’t think I’ll kick that opportunity again.
I wonder if he kept dragging me in the fight for ki, but Kyung-hee lost to me in the fight for ki.
Because I couldn’t win against being treated as an invisible person.
So I wondered if he really came to eavesdrop, but the doorknob moved slightly and made a noise.
“…………………………..”
I had no choice but to stop the lecture for a moment and stare at the door.
Then I started teaching again. Kyung-hee must have known that he couldn’t come in anyway.
It’s not a matter of unlocking, it’s a matter of emotion.
So I just decided to study and opened the book for my major.
I couldn’t pay attention to Kyunghee anyway.
I studied until dawn like that, and since I had to get up and go to school, I unlocked the lock and slept.
But when I woke up, I felt a strange pressure.
Kyunghee was riding on top of me and was burying her face in my chest.
As if he was wary of me waking up, he kept his face on his chest.
After dazedly appreciating the situation, I immediately asked what was going on.
“That’s Siwoo.”
“……………………………”
“We are still lovers…?”
“yes.”
“Jindo, did you hold hands and even kiss…?”
“no.”
“Ugh…”
I knew what was going on.
Whether it was sexual desire or exclusivity, it seemed that he couldn’t stand it and came to my room.
Since I didn’t have the courage to do anything else when I came, it was obvious that I buried my face in my chest to get vicarious satisfaction.
In the end, Kyung-hee, realizing that things were wrong, carefully lay down next to me.
Honestly, it wasn’t that I didn’t want to hug Kyung-hee either.
If I could, I wanted to play with Kyung-hee right now.
But now was not the time.
Kyung-hee was in a very unstable state.
Now, I know what happens when I get angry, and I just restrain myself.
The way I threatened the doctor, and the way I looked while I was being invisible.
I had absolutely no intention of allowing it until I reached the level of a normal person.
At least, I had to show myself getting better day by day.
However, if I explained that, I thought Kyung-hee would start a match, so I checked the time and gave up my arm.
Kyeong-hee, who carefully moved her head and moved her arm pillow, smiled shyly.
The ears were folded in half and came down naturally.
Then, Kyunghee spoke carefully.
“Can I suck your finger?”
“no.”
“Siwoo, you’re not enough.”
“So you let me lie next to you now.”
“It’s not enough to hug…”
“It’s not okay to beg like that.”
“Ugh…”
“It’s embarrassing even if we’re still new to society.”
“……I have a lot of money.”
Kyunghee grumbled.
I already knew. The fact that Kyung-hee’s novel is a huge hit and is doing well on the platform.
It’s a novel that Kyung-hee writes based on her realistic experiences, and there was no way she couldn’t get out.
But I’m not talking about money here.
Narrowly, it was a problem related to society, and broadly, it was a problem about Kyung-hee’s character and ideology.
A harsh word could have made Kyung-hee jealous of the child she gave birth to with a stomachache.
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Just as a child hates his younger brother because love is shared.
I could have been jealous of the child because Kyung-hee did not fully receive my love.
Rabbits attack or eat their young when stressed.
I wanted to avoid something like that, so I intentionally cut off whenever such words came out.
Kyeong-hee nodded while crying.
“Above all, I don’t want to say that I have a child even though I haven’t properly explained it to my parents.”
“Is that so…”
“Yeah. There are procedures and it’s polite. At least we’ll meet once, and after college and the military are settled.”
“army……….”
“By the way, the saying that you are exempted if you have three children is a nonsense.”
“……….yes.”
Kyunghee let out a deep sigh.
Slowly I looked at the time and it seemed that I should have breakfast and go to school.
I had a class from 9 o’clock today, so I had to go in advance and prepare.
So, after asking Kyung-hee for his understanding, I packed my bag and washed it.
Kyung-hee was making breakfast naturally.
Bacon and eggs were grilled, and kimchi was served.
Kyung-hee, who was nervous that I might not eat, was delighted when I grabbed the chopsticks.
After eating breakfast and brushing my teeth, I headed straight to school.