NOVEL NEXT “Mika, there’s a mistake in that formula.”
“Uh? Oh, you’re right… Wow—oh…”
After finishing my duties at the T-party as usual, I had been dragged halfway against my will to Nagisa’s house for some private tutoring in ballistics.
Every time I try to solve a problem, it feels like my head might explode, and with Nagisa putting in so much effort, it’s torture that I can’t even give up. Honestly, as I look at these example problems, I wonder why I even need to solve this stuff. It feels like that question in an elementary school textbook where Cheolsu and Younghee are doing something ridiculous, and you’re asked to find the answer.
“…Mika.”
“Ahaha, sorry, sorry! I didn’t mean to!”
Recently, Nagisa discovered that whenever I use “Wow—oh,” it often comes out instead of a curse word. How did she find that out? Well, it’s because “Wow—oh” is the only thing that comes out while studying ballistics. I tend to have a bit of a foul mouth, so it slips out easier, and inevitably, I got caught.
You might think it doesn’t matter since it doesn’t sound like a curse, but after Nagisa learned this fact, she started to feel an inexplicable discomfort.
What can I do? If it bothers my dear Nagisa, I should rein it in. If there’s a friend who is taking the time to teach me while being busy like this, that means they are someone worth keeping around for a long time, and such consideration is totally worth it in a relationship.
I thought I’d try to rein it in…
“Wow——oh…”
Ah, I really can’t take it anymore. Should I just quit?
“Mika, should we just stop?”
“N-Nagisa-chan…! I’m sorry! I made a mistake, so please don’t coldly abandon me! You’re all I have!”
…Upon thinking it over, I will just bear with it and try to work hard. So please, just give me one more chance, Nagisa!
If I don’t have you, I really have no hope, so please…
I’m not joking; if Nagisa isn’t around, I’m done for. It’s not like I can just go and ask the super genius beauty Urawa Hanako for help, who has mastered everything from first to third-year problems since the beginning of my freshman year.
Plus, at this point, Hanako is still a fresh-faced first-year and hasn’t interacted with either the T-party or the Sisterhood. She’s like a land flowing with milk and honey that no one has conquered yet…!
Oh, wait, should I try visiting Hanako sometime later? At the original timeline, she was seriously considering dropping out due to fatigue from reality at Trinity, so even if I approached her as a friend, it probably wouldn’t change much. But, if I could help her even a little, wouldn’t that be a nice thing?
“Why does it feel like I’m the only one you’ve mentioned, yet you seem to be thinking of other people immediately?”
Whoa. Nagisa, why are you so sharp? You gave me chills just now…
“Ahaha, no way. It’s all a misunderstanding, a misunderstanding! How could I do something so terrible as to abandon my second favorite, Nagisa-chan?”
“…Second?”
“Yeah, because my first favorite is me, of course! A person without self-love can never love others☆.”
Sounds like something a narcissist would say? Well, facts are facts. My absolute favorite is still Mika, now and forever.
Hearing that, Nagisa blinked for a moment, looking flabbergasted, then broke into a small giggle, covering her mouth with her hand. She seemed somewhat flustered; I guess my answer pleased her.
“Mika, that’s surprisingly profound… Hmm, I guess I can’t help it. I’ll let it slide this time.”
“Thanks, Nagisa-chan! I promise I’ll do well, so please believe me!”
I wasn’t quite sure what she meant by letting it slide, so I’ll just mumble something vague. Hopefully, it got through to her as me being serious about studying hard!
“Looking at the progress so far, it’s not bad. No, it’s even good enough to say it’s okay. If you keep up this pace, you should be able to avoid failing in ballistics as long as there aren’t any major mistakes during the actual exam.”
Uh, saying that makes it sound like I’m studying well enough to exceed the passing line in such a short time, starting from scratch.
“The reality is that the failing criteria are incredibly low, but yes. Still, seeing some hope is a good thing☆. I guess I’ll try a bit harder too!”
Though her mouth kept talking, her true thoughts were still trembling inside. I dislike ballistics… It’s just too dreadful… I want to quit this right now…
Fortunately, since Mika is a top-tier Trinity student, it doesn’t feel too difficult to hide my true feelings. It’s not unusual for those who appear bright to hide their true thoughts well, so it isn’t surprising at all. As if it was a normal part of life, Nagisa fell for it again.
“So, Mika, who is this student Hifumi?”
Wait a minute, why are you looking at the Momotalk notification on someone else’s phone?! And Hifumi, can you pick up on this!!!
*
This is a strange place.
No, it’s a place that is unfamiliar yet somewhat familiar.
“Mika, what do you think defines a person?”
As the darkness of night gives way to dawn, beautiful star clusters begin to flicker out one by one in the sky. From the corner of the T-party’s office, a girl gazes at the sky.
“Is it the persona formed by that person through their life? Or is it the accumulation of memories since the moment their consciousness awakened?”
A glowing halo in the form of a Canterbury cross casts a bright light above the girl’s head. Her long yellow hair, tied in a way that resembles a tail, shimmers as if it absorbs the fading starlight.
“If a person has lost their persona but retains their memories, can we still call that person ‘themselves’? And if their persona remains but they’ve forgotten everything, can they truly be considered whole?”
The girl naturally turns around, directing her gaze toward me. Then, as always, she gestures for me to sit at the tea table.
“Whichever way you put it, neither side resembles the original person. One is incomplete, and the other has lost its roots.”
“Seiya-chan, your words are unnecessarily long and complicated. There’s no need to throw a big philosophical question like that; there are simpler ways to start a conversation.”
“Even if they’re incomplete, or lost their roots, the fact that they are still the original person remains unchanged.”
“Isn’t it unnecessary to go on about how someone who has lost both their persona and memories isn’t the original person, Seiya-chan?”
Upon hearing my answer, the girl, Yurizono Seiya, smiles slightly and motions to a chair at the tea table.
I can’t help but feel like there’s some hidden meaning behind her gesture, leading to a chuckle escaping my lips. The implications of what she just said and her current action are clearer than ever.
“I’m not a knight or anything.”
As I pulled the chair back, Seiya promptly took a seat on it, harboring certainty instead of doubt.
“While I may not be a knight to me, it’s a bit of a different story for others. Well, this is a trivial matter, so I don’t have the obligation to inform you about it.”
Sliding into the chair across from Seiya, I noticed surprisingly that what was set before me wasn’t tea.
It was Cafe Mocha.
For someone like me, who doesn’t know coffee well, it’s one of the coffees I used to often take out alongside caramel macchiato. I don’t particularly like bitter flavors, but the balance of sweetness and bitterness has been a delightful revelation.
Seeing it in such an unexpected place, I forced a bitter smile as I lifted the cup. The sweet taste of chocolate and the bitter flavor of coffee filled my mouth, evoking long-forgotten memories.
This is quite an extraordinary gift for merely a cup of coffee. Even if I went to a cafe in Kivotos and ordered coffee, I probably wouldn’t feel this way. The fact that someone unexpected in an unpredictable location offered me my favorite coffee means they fully accept me as I am.
“Are you happy in your future?”
When I asked Seiya, her fox ears perked up. I guess she didn’t expect such a question.
“Indeed, you’re quick to understand. Clearly, you’re not Mika.”
“I already know because I’ve heard my answer, so was it really necessary to double-check, Seiya-chan?”
“Hmm, but you are also Mika.”
“Um…? What does that even mean? I don’t quite get it.”
“You’ve taken on Mika’s persona and are building new memories in Mika’s body. I can’t call you the original Mika, but I can say you’re Mika; that’s the conclusion we’ve reached.”
Does this mean someday my identity will be revealed, and that Seiya, and likely Nagisa too, will accept it? I hope it turns out like that. Now that the ‘future’ Seiya has revealed herself to me, it seems fair to say the road back to my original self is already closed.
“I’d like to remind you that this isn’t something we found out, rather, you revealed it first. You can remember it as having reasons why it was revealed. In due time, you will come to understand. Also, even if things get a bit out of whack, you needn’t worry too much.”
“Heh… it’s surprising that I revealed it first☆.”
“It felt unexpected for us too, that you would bring it up… Ah, but let’s leave it at that for now. I invited you here because I wanted to tell you something; if I can’t get to the main point, there’s no reason to have summoned you.”
A small bird lands on top of Seiya’s head. I’m pretty sure Seiya didn’t have a pet bird before. I wonder at what point she started to keep it. It might not even be a real bird but just something that exists only in this space.
“When that critical moment of choice comes for you, don’t hesitate. You must not hesitate. If you hesitate, you’ll ruin everything.”
Somehow, without me noticing, Seiya glided up beside me like a ghost and reached out, gently rubbing my head. It felt a bit strange due to her arm warmer.
“Remember. Doubt your choices meant for yourself all you want, but don’t doubt the choices meant for us. The path you choose will benefit everyone—”
And then, the dream world crumbles.