Beacon of Light in the Dark Sea

The sea viewed through the cable car was pitch black. This cable car goes from -200m to -50m, up to the first underwater base, right? Holding my nose with one hand, I looked outside through the clear window. Inside the small car racing through the deep blue darkness, there was almost no light, seemingly because the interior of the cable car was kept dark so we could see outside. Under different circumstances, riding this would have been quite fun. Swallowing a lump of blood that entered my mouth, I spoke.

“This is my first time riding an underwater cable car.”

“Same here.”

After uttering those words, Shin Haeryang immediately focused on Baek Ae-Young like a robot with its switch turned on. I opened the bag containing the snake. Inside it, along with a rag-like towel, was a sunset-orange whale toy named Noeul. Seeing the doll and towel, I immediately handed them over to Shin Haeryang. He grabbed them tightly and pressed them against Baek Ae-Young’s waist. The orange toy began to stain a deep red. Shin Haeryang looked up at my face and asked.

“How are you doing, Moohyun-ssi?”

“I’ve got a nosebleed. I’m okay. And Ae-Young-ssi?”

“She needs immediate medical attention.”

Upon hearing that, I wiped my bloodied knuckles and messy nose, then nodded. My nosebleed was almost stopping. But the cable car was crawling at a snail’s pace. The number next to the oxygen concentration, showing -195m, was slowly decreasing, but the speed was excruciatingly slow. I sighed heavily, looking at the snake lying still in the bottom of the bag, and then leaned my head against the glass wall, asking.

“Is the cable car always this slow?”

Asking in case it was broken, Shin Haeryang, who had been looking at the meter counter on the cable car, answered.

“Yes. It must go slowly. Because of the water pressure.”

…It seems that if it went faster, the cable car might explode. Shin Haeryang laid Baek Ae-Young down on the floor properly, and I occasionally clutched my forehead due to the headaches that felt like they were splitting my head. I wish I could take just one aspirin. Shin Haeryang checked his gun and the bullets in the gun Baek Ae-Young was carrying, after looking at me and Baek Ae-Young. Then, with his eyes closed, he said.

“There might be armed personnel waiting for us at the end of the cable car ride.”

I was about to nod in response, but realizing that Shin Haeryang was closing his eyes perhaps due to fatigue, I answered out loud.

“Yes.”

I couldn’t tell if Baek Ae-Young was unconscious or asleep. What was clear was that everyone in the cable car found some mental comfort in seeing Baek Ae-Young’s chest rise and fall. I just hope she doesn’t die anymore. Once we get out of this tiresome underwater situation and she receives quick medical treatment, she’ll be fine, right?

Shin Haeryang, pressing on Baek Ae-Young’s wound, had blood trickling down his cheek from beside his left temple, as if his skin was torn. Even though I tried not to look at the wound, every time I turned my head towards Shin Haeryang, the wound caught my eye. I rummaged through the bag with my left hand, trying to find something to stop it, but there was nothing useful. Most of what was in the bag was trash from the food we ate while climbing up the stairs. Since I felt guilty about littering on the floor, I couldn’t throw it away, so it all remained in the bag.

Looking inside the bag, I sighed and tried to tear off the left sleeve of my long-sleeved hoodie. But no matter how hard I pulled, it just wouldn’t tear. Why won’t this tear? They really make clothes well these days! I suddenly made eye contact with Shin Haeryang, who was looking at me as if asking what I was doing. Seeing me struggling, Shin Haeryang asked.

“Are you trying to rip your clothes?”

“Yes.”

Then Shin Haeryang pulled out a knife strapped to Baek Ae-Young’s thigh with one hand and leaned towards me. I quickly pulled my left arm out of the sleeve and tucked it into the torso part of the hoodie. Shin Haeryang effortlessly sliced through the sleeve with his knife and handed it to me. I shook my head without taking it.

“Press that to your forehead. You’re bleeding from your left temple.”

Instead of pressing the cloth to his face, Shin Haeryang wrapped it around his left forearm. I hadn’t noticed, but it seemed he had been shot in the left arm. I removed my hand, which had been continuously pressing my nose with my right arm sleeve. Blood pooled in my philtrum and dripped down my lips. I wiped the blood off with the cloth on my right forearm and then spat the accumulated blood in my mouth into a corner of the floor. It felt like it would choke me if I swallowed. Watching me, Shin Haeryang asked.

“Is it because of the gunfire?”

“I don’t know. I just suddenly got a nosebleed.”

My sky-blue hoodie was a mess. I had coincidentally put it on at the Central district’s laundromat, but I didn’t know who the owner was. If I ever meet them, I guess I’ll have to buy them a new one. I lifted my head to look towards the cable car door. -170m. It’s ascending very slowly. Thoughts of Yoo Geum-yi and Seo Jihyuk came flooding back to me like the ebb and flow of the tide.

To avoid thinking too much, I looked out into the darkness. The sea was pitch black. Only upon careful observation did I realize it was a deep, ink-like blue. While invisible to my eyes, this hue likely harbored a vast array of marine life. Creatures without gills or swim bladders might be desperately struggling to survive in these depths, and I could only imagine them watching us.

Suddenly, the cable car stopped. It ceased moving at -150m. I watched the numbers for a few seconds, hoping they would change, then spoke to Shin Haeryang, who was looking at Baek Ae-Young.

“Haeryang, it seems like we’ve stopped.”

“…Indeed.”

“Is there anything we can do to get the cable car moving again?”

“No.”

His response was as sharp as a knife. I was about to ask if we were doomed but stopped myself, fearing I couldn’t handle his response. Shin Haeryang glanced around the cable car before saying,

“Let’s wait. It might be an emergency stop.”

“I hope it starts moving again.”

Anxiously sitting, I waited, occasionally wiping the sweat from Baek Ae-Young’s forehead with the cleaner part of my sleeve, and stared hopelessly at the -150m reading on the display. This was worse than being stuck in an elevator. At least then, it wasn’t as difficult and despairing. It was scary, yes, but nothing compared to this. Overwhelmed by the absurdity of being trapped in such a place, I let out an empty laugh and said,

“I never imagined getting trapped like this.”

“Neither did I.”

Shin Haeryang, despite being trapped in a tiny space less than 3 square meters under -150m of sea, with two people in poor condition, seemed completely unfazed. His composure resembled that when we were climbing the stairs, and I couldn’t help but admire it internally. I felt so terrified I was on the verge of losing my mind. I wanted to burst into tears right then and there.

“How can you remain so calm?”

“Do I appear calm to you?”

“Yes.”

“It’s good that at least one of us seems calm in this situation.”

It seems he might be on the verge of losing it too. I tried to divert my despair from the fact that we were trapped in a device suspended in the depths of the sea without any safety measures. Reflecting on my recent past, I couldn’t recall many good memories. Thinking of Yoo Geum-yi, her words came back to me – the lady who didn’t want to live endlessly without her brain and heart. She deserved to live longer. She shouldn’t have died in such a terrible place.

“…What if we were to live an eternal life?”

Shin Haeryang lifted his head to look at me.

“Being trapped at -150m underwater would seem like an easy escape, wouldn’t it? Without dying, I mean.”

“…If we’re unlucky, we could keep drowning infinitely. Over and over again.”

Chills ran down my spine as soon as I heard Shin Haeryang’s words. Damn it. Is it fortunate that we can die? Shin Haeryang rummaged through the bag Baek Ae-Young had discarded in the corner. Empty water bottles and a few candies I had given came out. Does he dislike candy? Then, a cracked pad and a bottle of Valentine’s 50-year-old appeared. Seeing this, I laughed in disbelief. My cat on my back was shot by an unknown gunman, yet Baek Ae-Young’s whiskey bottle was intact without a scratch. As Shin Haeryang opened the bottle, which was more dirt-colored than brown, I exclaimed in surprise.

“You’re not planning to pour that on a wound, are you?”

“…I’m going to take a sip.”

“…Yes. Have as much as you like.”

In movies, gulping down alcohol and pouring it on wounds is something that only works on screen. Unless it’s around 80% alcohol, it will do more harm than good to the wound. At my last comment, Shin Haeryang chuckled, took a sip, made a face, and then offered the bottle to me. I, who usually only drinks beer and not much else, hesitated for a few seconds before taking the bottle and having a sip.

…Damn it. As soon as I took a sip, I read the label. The alcohol content was over 30%. Are they insane? Why would anyone drink this? I never understood people who drink whiskey. It felt like swallowing sulfuric acid, with my throat and stomach burning intensely. Coughing a few times, I paid the price for that single sip.

I watched Shin Haeryang, worried he might get completely drunk, but after taking one sip, he closed the bottle and placed it on the cable car seat. I thought I had barely drunk anything, but surprisingly, heat spread throughout my body, and I felt the intoxication reach the top of my head. Did I really drink that little? With my face suddenly flushed with heat, I was taken aback. Shin Haeryang seemed no different than before he drank. Is it because we’re underwater? Touching my heated face, I asked,

“Is it okay to swim after drinking?”

Suddenly, I remembered a saying that more people die drowned in alcohol than in the sea. Since I was on the verge of drowning in the sea, I asked, looking anxiously at the dark water, and Shin Haeryang slightly shook his head.

“If I had planned to swim, I wouldn’t have drunk.”

“Then why?”

“Because we don’t have any painkillers.”

“Ah…”

Then there was silence. I couldn’t tell if his words meant there was no need to swim or that swimming would be futile and lead to death. I tried to calm my anxious and restless heart. I wanted to get up in the cramped cable car and pace around restlessly, but I restrained myself.

Anxiety is contagious. No matter how tough and difficult it gets, let’s not give up hope. Act composed, as if nothing is wrong. Being scared won’t help this situation. The sea doesn’t spare anyone’s life, and it’s impartial to creatures without gills. If fear paralyzes my reason, then I won’t be able to do anything, so let’s stay calm. It’s okay. I’ve made it this far, haven’t I? Getting here is an achievement in itself.