Ball-Boy Tactics

I clung to his shoulders for what felt like a long time. As I struggled to catch my breath and our lips parted, I called his name, but Kwon Jungwoo didn’t stop.

I hadn’t even realized I was touching his earlobe. Letting go of the soft flesh, my hand slid down his thick neck and rested on his chest.

“Jungwoo…!”

I tapped his chest lightly several times. Eventually, the tension in his arms, which were wrapped around my back, eased. Just as I tried to sit up, thinking he was letting me go, Kwon Jungwoo pulled me back into a tight embrace. He placed his hand on the back of my head, keeping me from lifting it, and whispered in my ear.

“Just… stay like this for a moment.”

He sounded like he was struggling to hold something back, trying to control his breathing. Pressed against his shoulder, I too panted heavily, my chest rising and falling as my heart raced. Our hearts beat in sync, fast and relentless, refusing to calm down.

This was Kwon Jungwoo, the one who had said he wanted to hold me. Was that why, in the middle of the kiss, he suddenly hugged me so tightly? With desire still simmering, I closed my eyes tightly.

It was then that I realized all the blood had rushed to my center.

“…….”

When did it start? My lower half had grown quite hard, and I hadn’t even noticed because I was so caught up in the kiss. Thankfully, my bent knees kept my condition hidden from Kwon Jungwoo.

Embarrassment and shame made my face flush with heat. No, I’d been hot all over for a while now. I wanted to calm this excitement, but it wasn’t as easy as I thought.

Kwon Jungwoo was still trying to steady his breathing. His hand gently stroked the back of my head, and he swallowed as if holding something back. His grip around me remained tight, making it a little hard to breathe.

“Jungwoo, wait. My body feels a bit cramped…”

I only tried to move my leg slightly to sit up, but my leg buckled, and I collapsed onto him. At that exact moment, my aroused lower half pressed firmly against his thigh.

“Ah…!”

I immediately regretted looking at him.

Kwon Jungwoo’s eyes scanned my face, likely seeing the embarrassment written all over it. Then, as if he had confirmed something, he blinked slowly. Before he could say anything, I hurriedly started to explain.

“S-sorry. I just got a little excited.”

“…….”

“Like I said earlier, the alcohol’s making me horny. And you kiss so well that I just got carried away. It’s so embarrassing…”

“Jiwon, are you having fun?”

“What?”

“Stop testing my patience. You’ve won.”

“Ah!”

Suddenly, the world flipped, and before I knew it, I was the one lying down on the driver’s seat. Kwon Jungwoo had turned me over rather roughly and now pinned me down, straddling my thighs. Something large and hard was pressing against me from where our bodies touched.

“I told you. I’ve lost to you.”

With those words, Kwon Jungwoo captured my lips again.

He kissed me like a starved wolf, pressing down on me with overwhelming force, rendering me helpless as he dove deeper and deeper. My own excitement hadn’t faded either, and I eagerly met his tongue. I was so lost in the heat of the moment that I didn’t even realize when his large hand unzipped my tracksuit or when his knee slipped between my legs.

It wasn’t until his warm hand slid under my thin t-shirt that I became aware of it. My eyes snapped open, and there, right in front of me, was Kwon Jungwoo’s face, gazing down at me intently. His expression was different, more intense, almost intimidating.

“Stop… this.”

When I turned my head to avoid his lips, Kwon Jungwoo naturally started kissing my cheek, then my jawline, and down my neck. His grip on my wrists was tight, and with his other hand, he caressed my bare back.

“Wait, Jungwoo…!”

I tried twisting my body, but it was no use. Kwon Jungwoo’s lips trailed slowly down my neck, and the large hand that had been roaming my side now pressed firmly against my ribs.

“Ah…!”

I gasped as a wave of sensation, both ticklish and thrilling, surged through me. At that, Kwon Jungwoo bit down hard on my neck, and as I shuddered from the sharp sting, his fingers gripped my ribs with even more force. His strength was so intense, it felt like bruises would form where his fingers pressed.

“Jungwoo, don’t… don’t do this.”

I called out desperately, but Kwon Jungwoo didn’t stop. His soft lips continued to trail over the curve of my neck and shoulder.

I thought we’d just kiss. I didn’t think it would go this far. We shouldn’t be doing this. As I lay there, unsure of what to do, his hand, which had been caressing my bare skin, slowly slid higher, brushing against the sensitive spot on my chest.

“Ah…! No, stop.”

It wasn’t an accident. His fingers circled that small, sensitive point over and over. My chest felt like it would burst, and my heart sank. This wasn’t right. The real reason I had pushed Kwon Jungwoo’s confession away came flooding back to me. This was a line I couldn’t cross.

“No, stop. Kwon Jungwoo, don’t do this.”

“…….”

“Kwon Jungwoo! Stop! I said stop!!”

Only when I shouted again, firmly, did Kwon Jungwoo finally withdraw his hand from my shirt. His lips, which had been lingering near my collarbone, also pulled away.

I could feel his eyes on me, but I couldn’t bring myself to meet his gaze. That’s when I realized my entire body was trembling from the tension. Kwon Jungwoo, who had been staring at me silently, let out a deep sigh.

“…I’m sorry.”

As he sat up, the space between us grew. Though our lower halves were still pressed together, I could feel his arousal clearly, but I was too out of breath to move away.

“No, I… I’m the one who’s sorry. I’m really sorry, Jungwoo.”

“…….”

“I’m sorry… I think I’ve ruined everything.”

I felt like I had messed up our relationship. There was no excuse for how things had escalated; it was entirely my fault. The way I had deceived Kwon Jungwoo while pretending to be innocent was revolting, and it made my emotions surge uncontrollably. Kwon Jungwoo neither affirmed nor denied anything as I continued to blame myself.

“Let’s go if you’re sober.”

He only said that as he stopped looking down at me.

It was still raining. Although I had just become aware of the rain again, the silence felt heavy. It was still early summer, before the monsoon, but the air felt frozen.

In the car heading home, there was no conversation. We arrived at my house in no time, even though it had felt so distant before.

Kwon Jungwoo, even though I had only asked to be dropped off in front of the building, silently took me all the way to the underground parking lot, so I didn’t get a single drop of rain on me.

“…Thank you. And about today…”

I fumbled with the seatbelt I had already undone, trying to apologize again. I couldn’t lift my head in embarrassment. When I hesitated, unable to finish my sentence, Kwon Jungwoo spoke up for the first time in a long while. His voice was serious.

“I didn’t give you enough time to think. Time keeps moving, and it only makes you more anxious.”

Kwon Jungwoo sighed softly, running his hand through his hair. His hair, unstyled, fell softly.

“I won’t be a hindrance anymore.”

“…….”

“Be careful going in. Don’t get hurt.”

With his final words, I had no choice but to get out of the car. Until I closed the door, Kwon Jungwoo didn’t call out to me or offer a parting gesture. I was the only one who felt as usual, watching the car drive away.

Since that day, there had been no contact from Kwon Jungwoo.

There were no calls to walk to school together, and he didn’t come by the department building. I didn’t reach out either. Thinking back, I hadn’t reached out first before either.

Kwon Jungwoo was right. I had been playing with him and didn’t deserve this. Asking for time while I intended to refuse was selfish. Even knowing that, I hadn’t stopped.

What is the worst curse in the world? It doesn’t matter if it’s in a foreign language. Regardless, it’s a word born for me, so I kept cursing myself with words I couldn’t even pronounce.

I wondered what Kwon Jungwoo was thinking. What kind of days was he having? Had he given up on me? The possibility seemed high. I would have done the same. To him, I was like (the worst curse in the world), someone who had caused trouble while reeking of alcohol and acting out.

It would be good if he gave up first, but I didn’t understand why I kept feeling disheartened. I became anxious and restless over the lack of contact. I knew full well that our relationship wasn’t even a relationship.

How did it end up like this? Every day was filled with regret and anguish. My insomnia, which I thought had improved, returned. But what tormented me the most was the memory of Kwon Jungwoo’s warm presence.

Soft kisses trailing from my lips to my collarbone. His hand slipping under my shirt to caress my back and then gripping my ribs tightly. Fingers teasing the sensitive part of my chest. …And the firmness of his pants at the front.

Despite my self-reproach, my thoughts kept drifting in that direction, making my lower abdomen heat up several times, and each time, I would tear at my hair in self-loathing. When I discovered a kiss mark on my neck during a shower, it was bizarrely arousing. In any case, I was a person with no shame.

One day, as I was suffering from my own emotional turmoil, Byun Seungjin contacted me in the <Understanding Architecture> group chat.

***

I hadn’t planned to watch the basketball broadcast from the start.

7 PM, exactly when the game began.

I had just finished dinner, with no backlog of assignments or house chores. Finals were in two weeks, but… whatever, it wasn’t urgent.

Anyway, I had nothing to do today, and the apartment felt especially quiet, so I turned on the YouTube live stream. It had only been a few minutes since the game started, but the score gap had already widened by nearly 10 points. As Byun Seungjin had said, the players seemed to be in good condition.

Even in a wide shot of the basketball court, I could easily spot Kwon Jungwoo’s position.

“……”

I missed him.

Despite everything, the reason I had turned on the live stream was ultimately because I wanted to see Kwon Jungwoo. I felt fortunate that Kwon Jungwoo was a basketball player. It was the first time I thought that.

When Kwon Jungwoo filled the screen with a close-up shot, it felt strange. Of course, he hadn’t changed. If anything, he looked even more handsome? Either way, Kwon Jungwoo, dribbling the ball and skillfully cutting through the defense to shoot, looked the same as usual.

That night in the rain. The man who kissed me in the car, our breaths quickening, overwhelmed by the solidness of each other’s bodies—it was hard to believe that he was the same person on the screen.

Because it was an away game, Kwon Jungwoo wasn’t wearing his usual deep blue uniform, but a white one. Every time he touched the ball, three defenders stuck to him, trying to block him. No wonder Kwon Jungwoo was drenched in sweat….

Just when I had forgotten my complicated feelings about his seductive presence, an opponent player attempted a reckless block and ended up elbowing Kwon Jungwoo in the face. Since it happened during his shooting, Kwon Jungwoo couldn’t avoid the blow in midair.

.

The whistle blew, and the game was stopped. Kwon Jungwoo slumped down to the ground, and I stood up abruptly. I was too shocked to even scream.

Soon, the camera zoomed in on Kwon Jungwoo. His face was covered in blood. The crowd erupted in boos aimed at the opposing player. Kwon Jungwoo wiped his mouth a few times with his hand and signaled to the bench that he was okay, though he looked a bit irritated.

I quickly searched the internet for the jersey number of the player who elbowed him. I memorized his face and name perfectly, knowing I’d make sure to get revenge one day—there was no room for mistakes.

Back on the live stream, Kwon Jungwoo was preparing for his free throws.

Though his lips were swollen and there was a hint of bright red blood in his slightly open mouth, Kwon Jungwoo bounced the ball against the court without a care. He nailed both free throws with precision.

Yang Eunoh and Byun Seungjin approached Kwon Jungwoo for a high-five, and the game resumed. As time passed, the point gap widened further, and the game ended with a decisive victory for Korea University.

But my heart wouldn’t stop racing. I wanted to call him immediately to ask if he was okay, but the fact that I couldn’t made me feel deeply powerless. I didn’t deserve to worry about Kwon Jungwoo.

Feeling unsettled, I was about to exit the live stream when the screen replayed the game’s highlights and suddenly cut to Kwon Jungwoo and a reporter. The caption at the bottom read:

.

Standing with his hands behind his back, Kwon Jungwoo answered the reporter’s questions diligently. Judging by his swollen lips, the pain must still have been there, but he smiled and casually assessed today’s game. With the higher-definition camera now filming him, even the beads of sweat on his forehead were clearly visible.

“And lastly, there’s something I’ve been dying to ask you, Kwon Jungwoo. You were recently the talk of the internet due to a dating rumor. Haha. Are you still on good terms with Han Jiwon, the former national team player?”

Hearing my name mentioned was completely unexpected. I froze, clutching my phone.

Kwon Jungwoo had played well, but why was I being brought up now? And of all times, why now…? I often think this, but reporters sure know how to ask the most troublesome questions.

Kwon Jungwoo seemed surprised to hear my name mentioned, his eyebrows raising slightly. Despite that, he tilted his head to the side and smirked, looking incredibly charming.

“Of course. We’re still on very close terms,” he said.

The reporter laughed at his choice of the words “close terms,” while I nervously fidgeted, shaking my legs in agitation.

I had no idea what he was saying on a live broadcast.

But the conversation about me didn’t end there.

“‘Close terms,’ huh? Fans will be thrilled to hear that the two of you are so friendly. Could you maybe share the last conversation you had? Just a little?”

“He said he’s quit drinking. So if you ever catch Han Jiwon drinking, report it to me. Send me a photo and location, and I’ll come right away.”

“Quit drinking? It’s even more shocking to me that someone like Han Jiwon, who’s so familiar as ‘the nation’s grandchild,’ drank in the first place. Was Han Jiwon the type to drink often?”

“Why are you asking something like that? Don’t cross the line. Han Jiwon is known for not being able to handle alcohol, so don’t jump to conclusions.”

“Oh, I apologize if I was rude. Well… uh, then lastly, could you say a few words to Han Jiwon? Please look at the camera right in front of you.”

The reporter, clearly flustered, pointed to the camera, and Kwon Jungwoo casually followed his lead. The dissatisfaction that had been on his face slowly faded as the broadcast continued.

Kwon Jungwoo ran his fingers through his bangs. His voice came through clearly as he asked the reporter, “How’s my hair?”

He said it in a shameless tone, as if he had already forgotten that he’d just put the reporter in his place.

Kwon Jungwoo stood up straight again, hands behind his back. His gaze toward the camera carried both confidence and mischief. It felt like he was looking directly at me through my small phone screen, and I blushed while staring at it.

His lips curved into a crooked smile, as if he was teasing me.

“Jiwon, what are you thinking about right now?”

The small smile slowly spread into his signature, relaxed grin. With that confident expression of his, Kwon Jungwoo casually continued speaking.

“Only two days left.”

His lips, swollen from the injury, moved to deliver words only I could understand.

I don’t even know how the interview ended. The screen, which I had been staring at in a daze, was soon showing an empty shot of the basketball court, and the broadcast ended shortly after.

I was left in a state of shock.

It felt like everything I had neatly put together had just fallen apart.