Assistant Manager Kim Hates Idols

Seo Yunseop’s arrest on drug charges was so well-known that even non-idol fans knew about it.

 

It wasn’t because Seo Yunseop was particularly famous.

 

It was because he hadn’t done it alone. He’d dragged others into it as well. Worse yet, some of those involved were his own group members.

 

Not one, but a whole bunch of drug users had emerged from a single idol group. One of them was even revealed to be a distributor.

 

Naturally, the K-pop scene was in shambles. Seo Yunseop’s phone became evidence, and every idol in his contacts suffered scrutiny.

 

Among those names was Lee Cheonghyeon.

 

Lee Cheonghyeon and Seo Yuseop didn’t have any obvious connections in the public eye. At most, they had overlapping promotional schedules and appeared on the same shows a handful of times.

 

So, when Lee Cheonghyeon’s name surfaced, people assumed he’d quickly clear his name, just as other idols had. But then…

 

≫ Is L○○ perhaps Lee Cheonghyeon?

 

└ Please tell me it’s not him… I’m so tired of this

 

≫ What’s happening on the trending topics? I just woke up

 

≫ Mr. Lee Cheonghyeon becomes a black sheep due to drug addiction

 

└ Delete this… There are other trending topics to joke about

 

Lee Cheonghyeon was indeed found to be addicted to drugs. Just not illegal drugs.

 

Since he hadn’t abused illegal substances, there were no legal repercussions.

 

However, amidst the arrests of fellow artists, the fact that he was also taking drugs didn’t sit well with the public.

 

‘What kind of drug was it?’

 

I tried to recall, but my memory was blank.

 

Maybe this whole regression thing had turned my brain into a sponge—my head felt full of holes.

 

Moreover, it was also puzzling why Lee Cheonghyeon was in contact with Seo Yunseop in the first place.

 

There didn’t seem to be any reason for them to interact—they had little in common, no real connection.

 

Before, I wouldn’t have cared about this sort of thing, busy making videos like ‘Other Idols Mentioning Spark: A Compilation’, but the situation was different now.

 

What if, even if it wasn’t drugs, that bastard Seo Yunseop had coerced Lee Cheonghyeon into something…?

 

‘We’re screwed.’

 

I didn’t know how much Lee Cheonghyeon’s brilliance had ignited Seo Yunseop’s greed, but it seemed I’d have to attach a 24-hour security detail to Lee Cheonghyeon during this retreat.

 

* * *

 

The bus, laden with surveillance, rivalry, and iron walls, soon arrived at a large pension in Gapyeong.

 

Gapyeong, of all places. It felt like just yesterday I got eaten alive by bugs while hiding treasure hunt clues in the yard of a pension here.

 

The dizzying memory mingled with the humid summer air and clung to me.

 

But I needed to focus.

 

While misplacing a note during the Hanpyeong Industry treasure hunt didn’t make headlines, failing to protect Lee Cheonghyeon properly could put Spark plastered all over the front page of entertainment news.

 

I wedged myself between Lee Cheonghyeon and Kang Kiyeon as they walked towards the pension, each pulling a suitcase.

 

I slung my arms around their shoulders and said,

 

“My maknaes.”

 

“Yes?”

 

“What?”

 

“Don’t get distracted by the crowd and stick close to your hyungs, okay?”

 

Choi Jeho chided me from behind, telling me to take care of my own luggage. I turned to see Jeong Seongbin pulling my suitcase as well.

 

The retreat hadn’t even begun, and I already had a headache.

 

“The first mission is ‘Making Your Own Dinner’!”

 

“Gasp. We have to make everything ourselves?”

 

The cast buzzed as someone received and read the mission instructions.

 

It was understandable. There were over forty mouths to feed here. Even just making ramen would be a huge task.

 

“Wow, with so many people, I wouldn’t even know where to start.”

 

Someone from All Over said, scratching their head.

 

“Then shall we divide into grocery shopping and meal preparation teams?”

 

Moon Yeongyu offered a suggestion.

 

“Having twenty people just focused on meal prep seems a bit inefficient. I think a few people would be enough!”

 

Song Minil chimed in.

 

That b*tch, he was just saying he didn’t want to do it. I saw you kicking around the soccer ball outside the pension earlier, don’t think I didn’t.

 

Suppressing a sigh, I joined the conversation.

 

“How about dividing into grocery shopping, meal preparation, and dishwashing teams? Since we need to clean up afterward, it would be good to divide the roles. Plus, it’ll give us more footage for the broadcast!”

 

Even with this suggestion, some people would still try to slack off. But if they were going to play around, they might as well generate some content.

 

* * *

 

“We’ll be back!”

 

With cheerful goodbyes, the grocery shopping team departed. A member of Log was driving.

 

Meanwhile, I found myself dragged along purely because someone decided I was the greatest intellectual of IDC.

 

‘Writer, how much can we spend?’

 

‘What’s the card limit?!’

 

Watching the idols bounce around like hyperactive rabbits, the writers had begged me to keep an eye on them.

 

I had followed them, thinking pessimistically that my presence wouldn’t make much of a difference, but…

 

“How much ssamjang and gochujang should we buy? Two jars each?”

 

“I saw some gochujang in the cupboard earlier. Let’s just get ssamjang.”

 

“Should we buy ten bags of these leafy greens?”

 

“Since we’re buying in bulk, it’ll be cheaper to buy individual vegetables rather than the pre-packaged mix. Just lettuce and perilla leaves, please.”

 

Watching them toss items haphazardly into three carts, I began to understand why the writers sent me.

 

But did I really need to manage the broadcasting company’s corporate card limit? It was not even a UA card.

 

“Whoa, they sell yukhoe here! Should we go for a full yukhoe bibimbap meal with short rib soybean paste stew for dinner?”

 

“That’s insane. Buy it right now.”

 

…

 

“Hyung, want some beer?”

 

“Ah, I’d grab some right now if it weren’t for the minors. Too bad.”

 

“Why not let the adults drink while the kids stick to soda?”

 

…

 

“Don’t you think we’re buying too many snacks? These are definitely going to go to waste.”

 

“Eh, someone will eat them.”

 

Seriously, do these bastards never learn about how to be considerate of others in ethics class?

 

What if there are people who can’t eat raw meat? Why are they trying to make everything into yukhoe bibimbap?

 

And there are so many minors here, yet they’re seriously considering buying alcohol? Are they trying to get all of us canceled in a teen drinking scandal?

 

Which one of you said someone would eat the leftovers? Do they think other people are garbage disposals for celebrity snacks? What a thoughtless thing to say.

 

My insides burned black. Dealing with Spark was never this maddening, but now I felt like my entire digestive system was being twisted into knots.

 

In the end, I had to sift through all three carts like I was wringing them dry.

 

Using the skills honed from confiscating the clicky keyboard the owner’s son had snuck into the cart, I managed to save up 200,000 won.

 

Consider it a donation to the stage production budget. But this is the last time. Next time, I’m turning a blind eye..

 

* * *

 

Is there anything more meaningless than dividing roles?

 

I used to work in HR. Back then, my tasks included registering new hires, managing leave days, uploading job postings, scheduling interviews, headhunting, purchasing office supplies, processing terminations, managing building cleanliness, appeasing executives, and issuing various documents.

 

But the HR manager at the Hanpyeong Industry had to do a bit more.

 

For example, stanning idols on behalf of the manager, installing building signs, picking locked doors, manually cracking passwords on PCs left locked by former employees, running ramen errands, reading the executives’ autobiographies aloud… F*ck.

 

Anyway, the point was, dividing roles didn’t mean much in practice.

 

Look at me now. I just got back from grocery shopping, and now I was wearing work gloves and arranging charcoal in a drum.

 

Perhaps because there were so many people that one or two slackers weren’t noticeable, most of them just said, ‘What can I do?’ and then proceeded to do absolutely nothing.

 

It was somewhat comforting that Choi Jeho, who learned how to light charcoal from me in the last self-produced video, was handling the torch himself.

 

He skillfully lit the newspaper and transferred the flame to the charcoal. Finally, one member was living up to the group’s name.

 

“Hyung, should I do it?”

 

“A kid shouldn’t play with fire. Kiyeon, go wash the vegetables.”

 

Even amidst this chaos, Spark took the initiative to find tasks. They were a far cry from the Spark of the past, who would freeze up on variety shows.

 

I was proud, but they shouldn’t be the only ones working. I wouldn’t stand for it.

 

Fuming like a raging yaksha, I was startled when Yeo Seongchan appeared with Moon Yeongyu.

 

“Hyung, stop that and go inside! Yeongyu and I will grill the meat.”

 

“You two alone won’t manage. There are too many mouths to feed.”

 

“We’ll just call in reinforcements. Ah, the All Over hyungs said they wanted to try grilling.”

 

“No, I’ll grill. I’m really good at it.”

 

At the mention of All Over, I quickly snatched the plate and tongs from Yeo Sungchan’s hands. I didn’t want to eat drug-laced samgyeopsal.

 

“Wouldn’t it be better to sit down and eat comfortably?”

 

“I take pride in outdoor grilling. Please let me do it.”

 

After pleading with Moon Yeongyu, I finally secured a drum barrel.

 

As I was grilling, inhaling the acrid smoke, Moon Yeongyu spoke,

 

“Hyung, I heard you got scolded by Joowoo after our stage performance?”

 

“Who told you that?”

 

“Seongbin did. We were on the same bus earlier. That’s when I heard it.”

 

It seemed the leaders sat together. Couldn’t they have discussed something more constructive with that positioning?

 

“Don’t even mention it. It was hard to appease him.”

 

“Still, Spark seems really close. Even just chatting with them for a bit, they all seem so kind.”

 

“The members are all kind.”

 

I couldn’t deny that they were kind, even if they caused some ridiculous trouble sometimes.

 

“Aren’t the Berion members close too?”

 

“We’re all the same age.”

 

Do they think there’s a big age gap in Spark or something?

 

…Wait, is there? Is there a big gap between me and them?

 

As I pondered, someone held out a plate of grilled meat. It was Jeong Seongbin.

 

“Hyung, eat while you grill.”

 

“What about you? Have you eaten?”

 

“There’s plenty of meat over there. Don’t worry and eat. You too, Yeongyu hyung!”

 

Jeong Seongbin smiled kindly.

 

As expected of Jeong Seongbin, the true leader of our time, ensuring no one felt left out, even around the charcoal grill.

 

I was enjoying the ssam, even with the scattered ash, when a completely unexpected guest arrived.

 

The Log members arrived wearing gloves.

 

“Here, Mr. Iwol and Mr. Yeongyu, go eat now!”

 

Log members pushed Moon Yeongyu and me toward the tables. They each grabbed tongs, loaded the emply plates with grilled meats, and handed them to us.

 

“Sunbaenim, I can finish grilling…”

 

“No, no. We’ve eaten enough!”

 

“The dongsaengs were worried that Iwol hyung wasn’t eating. Hurry up and eat. Isn’t our maknae watching?”

 

“Come on, hyung always makes sure to eat well!”

 

With Log joining in, the atmosphere became even more boisterous.

 

Glancing toward the table, I noticed Park Joowoo and three others—Choi Jeho was busy eating his own meal—staring intently at me.

 

It had been ages since we had samgyeopsal, they should focus on eating themselves.

 

I trudged over, took off my work gloves, and ate the meat I had just grilled.

 

Perhaps because it had been so long, the fatty, smoky flavor was incredibly satisfying.