Arcane: I have Plasmids F*** YEAAAAAAH!!!

Lukas stood there, arms crossed, watching as his only set of clothes hung over a rock, drying under Zaun's dim, flickering lights.

He was, for lack of a better term, butt-naked.

A sigh escaped his lips.

"What I wouldn't give for the Incinerate plasmid right now."

Burning his clothes dry would be so much faster.

…Then again, knowing himself, he probably would've accidentally set himself on fire.

"Right. Never mind. Bad idea."

And so, here he was.

Waiting.

Completely exposed to the elements, sitting on a rock, feeling like some caveman in the apocalypse.

He leaned back, staring at the ceiling of the Undercity. The occasional drip of water echoed in the distance, mixing with the quiet laughter of the kids still playing in the chemical-infested waterfall.

Life in Zaun, huh?

He never would've thought he'd end up in a situation like this.

Yesterday, he was just a regular teenager, spending his nights gaming and edging like some godforsaken monk of degeneracy.

Now?

Now he was a murderer with a superpower, a dream, and a severe lack of pants.

"Life really comes at you fast."

And that's when he heard it.

A snicker.

Lukas's brow twitched.

The fuck?

Another giggle, this time louder.

He turned his head slowly.

And there she was.

Sitting on a rock a little higher up, swinging her legs and pointing at him like he was the funniest thing she had ever seen.

A blue-haired gremlin with a wide, dumbass grin stretched across her face.

And she was laughing at him.

Lukas blinked.

Then realization hit him like a brick to the skull.

No.

No fucking way.

POWDER.

A cold chill ran down his spine.

And just when he thought things couldn't get worse, the little gremlin turned her head and called for backup.

"Vi! C'mere! You gotta see this!"

Oh, you little shit.

Lukas sat up so fast he almost fell.

"Oi, oi, oi! What the fuck are you doing?!" he barked.

But it was too late.

The reinforcements had arrived.

A new voice chimed in from behind Powder, carrying the casual confidence of someone who had never lost a fight in her life.

"The hell are you yelling about, Powder?—"

Vi stopped mid-sentence.

Lukas froze.

A girl with short, messy pink hair stood beside Powder, arms crossed, a cocky smirk already forming on her face.

Behind her, two other kids followed—

One big, one ugly as shit.

It was them.

The whole damn Troublemaker Squad.

Vi, Claggor, Mylo.

Lukas was staring at the literal main characters of Arcane.

And what was his grand, glorious first meeting with them?

Buck-ass naked, sitting on a rock, with his clothes drying behind him.

Fucking kill me.

Vi raised an eyebrow, her smirk growing as she took in the absolute state of him.

"Holy shit, dude," she scoffed, crossing her arms. "Kinda bold of you to be this confident with your, uh… size."

…

This bitch.

Lukas's eye twitched.

"Wow. Original. Short joke. Never heard that before," he deadpanned. "Tell me, does that hair dye come in 'Not Ugly' or is that just a limited edition?"

Vi's smirk dropped.

Powder wheezed.

Even Claggor let out a snort.

Mylo, ever the opportunist, jumped in.

"Pfft—Vi, he got you good!"

Vi's brow twitched. She jabbed a thumb at Lukas, scoffing.

"Yeah? Well, maybe I'd take him seriously if he wasn't pointing at me with his whole ass out."

Lukas blinked.

Wait.

Wait.

WAIT.

He looked down.

His entire body locked up.

OH FUCK.

In his righteous fury, he had forgotten he was naked.

And now he was standing there—**fully exposed—**while pointing directly at Vi.

A heavy, unbearable silence settled over them.

Powder was dying laughing.

Vi just stared at him, deadpan.

Lukas, for the first time in his life, knew the true meaning of regret.

"…I can explain," he muttered.

Vi scoffed, shaking her head.

"Nah, you know what? I think I've seen enough."

She turned to the others.

"Let's get outta here before this weirdo gives Powder brain damage."

Powder, still cackling, followed after her sister.

Claggor shrugged and went along with them.

And Mylo?

Mylo gave Lukas one last disgusted look before walking away like he had just seen the worst thing imaginable.

Lukas stood there.

Alone.

Defeated.

Humiliated beyond belief.

Slowly, he sank back down onto his rock.

"…That could've gone better."

---

Lukas didn't stick around.

The moment his clothes were dry, he grabbed them, threw them on, and got the fuck out of there.

His face still burned with second-hand embarrassment.

"God dammit," he muttered under his breath. "Of all the people in Zaun, it just had to be them, huh?"

The worst part?

Powder and Vi were gonna remember this forever.

He could already imagine it.

Somewhere, years from now, Jinx was gonna be retelling this story, laughing her blue-haired ass off about the time they found some naked dumbass at the waterfall.

Just fucking great.

He let out a deep sigh as he walked through the streets, tugging his hoodie down lower.

"Alright, let's just pretend today never fucking happened."

He had more important things to worry about.

Like, for example—

Taking over the world.

A smirk pulled at his lips.

Hextech? Pfft. Who needs that?

Piltover? Ha. Overrated.

No gods. No kings.

Only men. (HA! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY)

"Zaun will be my Rapture."

…Then he coughed violently and nearly choked on his own spit.

"—gaughhh, fuck, shit, ow—"

Lukas hunched over, wheezing.

Okay. Maybe one step at a time.