All the Waifus in This Chat Group… Are Actually Me?!

He knew he shouldn't laugh at the suffering of others…

But this shit was just too fucking funny.

Especially considering the fact that his most hated protagonist had just turned into a goddamn baby.

Why did he hate him so much?

Honestly, he wasn't even sure anymore. It had been too long since he last watched the anime, and most of the details were blurry in his mind. But one thing remained crystal clear—he despised that bastard with every fiber of his being.

Maybe it was because most of the spirits in that world had suffered indirectly because of this so-called protagonist. And yet, despite all that pain and tragedy, the fucker had the audacity to receive their affection and power like he actually deserved it. That shit didn't sit right with him.

Sure, the protagonist wasn't deliberately responsible for their suffering. It was the Original Spirit who had caused all of it in the first place. But still… something about it rubbed him the wrong way.

Imagine being a victim of some massive tragedy, losing everything because of someone else's actions—only to then be told that you should love and support the very person who benefited from your pain.

The one who gained power, status, and a harem—all because of the suffering you and countless others had to endure. And worst of all, he wasn't even aware of how fucked up it all was.

Everything always worked out in Shidou's favor, not because of anything he actually earned, but because of the manipulation of the Original Spirit.

He was handed everything on a silver platter, acting like the righteous hero while being completely oblivious to the corpses that paved the way for his so-called "destiny." The spirits who suffered and lost so much were forced to love him, to give him their power, and in the end, he faced no consequences. No blame. Nothing.

Instead, this dumbass ended up with a massive harem, loved by everyone, treated as if he had done nothing wrong.

The hypocrisy of it all was what pissed him off the most.

That was Itsuka Shidou in a nutshell.

And that was why he fucking hated him.

That hypocrisy pissed him off more than anything.

If Shidou had been an outright villain, a selfish bastard from the start, it would have been much better. But he wasn't. He had the face of a hero while standing on a throne built on suffering.

Even Issei didn't disgust him as much as this motherfucker did.

Well, calling Shidou a motherfucker is pretty damn accurate—after all, his lover in his past life was basically his own mother. So yeah, he was quite literally a motherfucker.

Watching him get hit by Zafkiel and turned into a helpless baby was beyond satisfying. It was so damn cathartic that he felt like celebrating, throwing a feast in honor of this poetic justice. The sheer joy of seeing that bastard reduced to an infant made his blood sing.

Turning his attention to Kurumi, he grinned.

She was another version of himself—one who had been transmigrated into Kurumi Tokisaki's body in the world of Date A Live.

The full story behind her existence remained uncertain. Had she been transmigrated outright, or had her past life memories suddenly awakened when she witnessed the horrific experiments performed by the Original Spirit on her friends? Had the sheer trauma of that moment unlocked something buried deep inside her? The specifics were unclear, but one thing was undeniable—her hatred wasn't some shallow grudge born from fiction.

It was real. It was personal. It came from firsthand suffering.

How could they not hate the Original Spirit and Shidou?

Those bastards tricked Kurumi into slaughtering her own neighbors, her friends, her family. And for what?

For this piece of shit named Shidou?

His jaw clenched as the memories played in his mind—the absolute bullshit luck Shidou had throughout the anime, contrasted against the relentless suffering Kurumi endured. The more he thought about it, the more his rage boiled over, twisting his face into a mask of barely-contained fury.

That fucker deserved worse than just being turned into a baby.

"Another me, you're too soft," Khan said to Kurumi, his voice laced with disapproval.

"You should've stolen his power and devoured him the moment he was alone. It would've saved us so much time already."

"Ara... Are you mad for me, another me?" Kurumi didn't hurry to answer. Instead, she traced a delicate finger down his chest, her touch slow and teasing.

"I saw it. I saw everything, another me. How you get filthy with all your female selves," she chuckled, her crimson eyes glowing with mischief. "I wouldn't mind, you know. After all… we were one from the very beginning."

Khan deadpanned. "We're here to discuss serious matters, Kurumi."

"Of course, I know that." She smirked, blowing a warm breath against his ear before stepping back, acting as if nothing had happened.

With a playful hum, she picked up a teacup—one conveniently placed on a garden table, a remnant of Nero's brief indulgence in aesthetics when she created this blank space. Kurumi took a slow sip, savoring the moment.

"It seems Kaguya and Nero are busy, and we're the only ones here, another me," she mused, her lips curling into a devilish smile. "Why don't we take this opportunity to… get to know each other better?"

Khan narrowed his eyes. "I knew Kurumi was naughty in canon, but who would've thought another version of me would be just as bad?"

His fingers twitched with temptation, wanting to grab her right then and there, bend her over the table, and fuck that smug attitude right out of her.

But business first. Pleasure could wait.

Kurumi let out a soft giggle, her teasing demeanor shifting into something more sincere. Her voice lowered, turning gentle, almost comforting.

"It's not so bad, is it? You certainly feel better after all of this, don't you, another me?" she murmured. "There's no need to be angry for me. Constantly being angry isn't good for you… or for us."

Khan exhaled slowly, his irritation melting just a bit as he listened.

"Whether it's the Original Spirit or Shidou, they'll pay their dues," Kurumi continued, her tone growing sharper. "And I have a better plan to thwart the Original Spirit's schemes—to make all their efforts amount to nothing."

She placed the teacup down and met his gaze, her eyes gleaming with ruthless cunning.

"They need Spirits, don't they? To date them, to empower Shidou… So let's take them first. Before they can even make a move, I'll transport the Spirits to Ancient Rome… or to Kaguya's world. And once we're done, we'll go back in time and make sure the Original Spirit never becomes a threat to begin with."

She smiled darkly. "So, what do you say, another me? Do you want to hop in?"

Khan's grin was just as wicked. "Is that even a question?"

They both chuckled at the same time.

And Shidou had no idea what was coming for him.

***

Meanwhile, in the Date A Live world, Origami found herself staring at an unbelievable sight. Amidst the ruins of the battlefield, where the elimination of Princess had been abruptly canceled due to her sudden disappearance along with the Worst Spirit, a lone figure remained—an infant.

A baby Shidou lay motionless among the debris, his small form covered in dust. The surveillance footage replayed the shocking moment: the Worst Spirit had shot him with a strange bullet, and in an instant, he had regressed into a helpless child.

Ryouko Kusakabe, one of Origami's comrades in the AST, looked at her with concern. "Origami… do you know who he is?" she asked, her voice tinged with worry.

Origami's expression was unreadable, but her grip on the small body in her arms tightened. Her usually icy gaze burned with something deeper—something far more dangerous.

"I know him," she replied simply, her voice quiet but firm.

Then, as if barely restraining a storm inside her, she clenched her fists, her knuckles turning white.

"And they will pay for it," she hissed under her breath.

Her fury simmered beneath the surface, cold and calculating. First, her parents had been stolen from her. Now, they had turned Shidou into a mere joke, stripping him of his very existence as she knew it.

She was tired of being a victim. Tired of having everything she cared about stolen away.

Ironically, Origami had no idea that the true source of all her suffering—the one responsible for her parents' deaths—was none other than the baby she now cradled in her arms. The very same Shidou Itsuka.

What would happen if she learned the truth?

Only time would tell.

***

After this, Esdeath will be arriving soon, and I will choose my next girl—Krul Tepes. It has been a very, very long time since I've waited for someone to write about Seraph of the End, but no one has ever bothered. I wanted to explore that world after finishing Akame ga Kill, maybe even fusing it with Highschool of the Dead, School Days, and some other hentai worlds.

I need to speed up the updates for this fic. I think it's unbearably slow—two chapters per day is slow by my standards. My ideal pace is four chapters per day. Unfortunately, my fingers still hurt like hell from typing so much. Moreover, this isn't the only story I'm writing. I plan to post another story later after I've stockpiled at least 30 chapters, so I can do a mass release on the first day when the power ranking resets.

There is one thing I need to ask: Krul Tepes' brother is a femboy, and he is indeed very beautiful, looking like a girl. Should we smash, or do you choose not to because you don't like femboys?