All the Waifus in This Chat Group… Are Actually Me?!

What would you do if you suddenly found yourself stranded in Japan with no passport, no identity, and absolutely nothing to your name except for your own body?

No money, no phone, no way to prove who you are—just you, lost in a foreign land.

That's exactly what happened to our protagonist, Khan. He was stuck on a worn-out park bench, surrounded by kanji-filled signs and Japanese text that made no damn sense to him.

He couldn't read any of it, and to make matters worse, he couldn't speak a single word of Japanese either.

Every time people passed by, they spoke in rapid, fluent Japanese. He could barely catch a single familiar word, and even if he wanted to do something about his shitty situation, the language barrier was a massive wall in his way.

It was frustrating as hell. He was trapped in a country where nobody understood him, and he didn't understand any of them either.

He only spoke English—just that. Nothing else.

But something was weird. The world around him didn't feel entirely… real. It felt off, almost surreal, as if he had walked straight into an anime or a 2D world.

The differences were obvious—the overly vibrant hair colors, the oddly proportioned bodies, the exaggerated expressions. Everything about the people walking past him screamed "fictional."

Then, on the street, he spotted a familiar face. A massive poster of Hoshino Ai, clear as day.

His stomach twisted a little. That confirmed it. This wasn't just Japan—this was anime Japan.

After aimlessly wandering around for a while, he ended up back at the park. He sat on the same damn bench, pretending like everything was fine, like he had some sort of plan.

But in reality? He didn't know how long he'd last like this. His stomach growled painfully from hunger, and exhaustion was creeping into his bones.

"Hah…" He exhaled tiredly, rubbing his face.

Looks like he was spending the night here. Fucking fantastic.

For now, all he could do was rest.

Maybe tomorrow, he'd figure out a plan—some way to survive.

Just as he was about to close his eyes, a sleek black car rolled up in front of him.

The sight of it alone was enough to put him on edge. This wasn't some random civilian car—it was high-end, expensive, the kind of vehicle that belonged to someone powerful.

The door opened, and stepping out was a maid.

Not just any maid—she was stunning.

A blonde hair, piercing blue eyes, and an air of refined elegance.

She was the kind of woman you'd expect to see in a goddamn mansion, not randomly approaching a homeless foreigner in the park.

Then, she spoke.

"@#$%$#$$*£**"

Yeah. No idea what the fuck she just said. He didn't speak Japanese, remember?

The maid furrowed her brows, clearly confused.

"Ahem… Do you speak English?" Khan asked, his voice a little awkward.

The maid's expression shifted slightly, and after a moment, she responded in fluent English.

"Yes… I do. Ahem. That makes things easier. Miss Kaguya wishes to speak with you, boy. For some reason, she does."

Kaguya?

As in… Kaguya Shinomiya?

Khan blinked. He had no idea why the hell someone like her would want to speak with him, or why she'd even bother acknowledging his existence.

She wasn't exactly the type to go out of her way for strangers—especially not some random, broke foreigner in a park.

But right now?

He wasn't in a position to be picky.

Help was help.

He gave the maid a slight nod, swallowing his questions for now.

"Alright," he said, standing up. "Lead the way."

With that, he stepped into the car, the luxurious interior swallowing him up.

And there she was.

Kaguya Shinomiya.

Sitting right across from him in the backseat.

She was exactly like he remembered—long, dark hair, ice-cold expression, an aura of power and elegance.

But the moment their eyes met, something shifted.

Her crimson gaze softened—just a little, barely noticeable—but it was there.

She didn't speak immediately.

Not until the car started moving, with Ai—the maid—taking the wheel and driving them away from the park.

Then, finally, Kaguya broke the silence.

"Khan…" she said, her voice calm yet firm. "I know who you are. I know you're confused. And, to be honest, so am I. But we'll talk once we get home—without any third parties listening in."

He nodded. For some reason, he didn't know why, but he felt that the girl standing before him was incredibly trustworthy—almost as if she were a mirror reflection of himself.

The only person he had ever trusted was himself, and himself alone.

So, he couldn't comprehend where this unfamiliar trust was coming from.

Nor did he understand why he had this strange instinctual feeling toward her.

His heart and instincts always scream at him to trust her as he trusts himself.

However, Kaguya wasn't entirely silent either.

Without hesitation, she reached out and touched his hand, her fingers gripping it tightly.

Then, in an instant—like a sudden epiphany—his mind was flooded with memories that did not belong to him. No, to be precise, they were her memories.

But it wasn't just the memories.

It was everything.

Her skills in life, her knowledge of martial arts, her expertise in business management, her proficiency in archery, her mastery of multiple languages—everything was absorbed into him, becoming a part of him as if they had always been his own.

Now, he didn't have a problem with the language barrier anymore and could understand and speak Japanese fluently, not just limited to "ikkeh ikkeh kimochi" and "yamete kudasai."

And, he finally understood where this deep sense of trust was coming from. She was him, and he was her, existing as one and the same in this moment.

He knew exactly why Kaguya reached out to touch his hand—because they both understood, thanks to all the fanfiction they had read, that this was how power could be obtained and identities could be confirmed at the same time.

After all, reading countless fanfics had its own perks.

"Yes, just like you're thinking, Khan. You are me, and I am you." Kaguya chuckled, a knowing smirk on her lips.

Before he could respond, another voice interrupted them.

"Miss Kaguya, we have arrived," Hayasaka Ai said as she opened the door for them.

Kaguya, still holding onto Khan's arm intimately, turned toward Ai and spoke in a commanding tone. "Now, leave us, Ai. I want to speak with Khan alone. In private."

Her stern and serious tone was enough to make Ai hesitate. She had wanted to say something, but under Kaguya's sharp gaze, she swallowed her words and bowed instead.

"If that is what you wish, Miss. I will take my leave."

With that, she exited, leaving the two of them alone.

Neither Kaguya nor Khan spoke a single word as they walked toward her private chamber.

A tense silence lingered between them, but when they finally arrived, Kaguya suddenly let out a playful chuckle.

The cold, formal mask she had been wearing disappeared in an instant.

"It must be hard for you, huh? Myself?" she said, tilting her head with amusement. "I don't know why you managed to cross over with your body intact, while I was reborn as Kaguya. But I have a theory—our soul must have split after the car accident. You retained your original body, while I was reincarnated into this one."

She stepped closer, her crimson eyes gleaming with something… mischievous.

"Anyway, I know you always liked Kaguya," she whispered, her voice dripping with temptation. "So, tell me… don't you want to do ecchi things with me? This is your own body, after all. Moreover, we were both virgins for twenty years in our past life. I think it's about time we found out how it feels."

Her words hit him like a truck.

His throat went dry, and he gulped, his mind running wild with thoughts he probably shouldn't be entertaining.

It was a very tempting offer.

Extremely tempting.

But then—

Grrrrooooowllll!

His stomach suddenly let out a loud, embarrassing protest, snapping him back to reality.

Kaguya blinked at him before laughing softly, covering her mouth in amusement.

"Ah… It was inconsiderate of me, indeed," she admitted. "Fine, I'll prepare a feast for you. Eat as much as you want, Khan."

With that, she reached into her bag, pulled out her phone, and started typing something.

After a moment, she looked back up at him.

"Done. Ai will arrive shortly and bring you some meals."

"Okay... Thank you, Kaguya," he said awkwardly. Even though he knew she was his soul—his very self—it still felt strange to process all of this.

"You are me, and I am you. So, there's no need for formality between us," Kaguya replied, gripping his hand tightly. "Don't you feel that you want to get closer to me? And, in doing so, you want to get closer to yourself?"

Her touch was warm, comforting—something he'd never experienced before.

Was this what she meant?

She pouted when he remained silent, staring at her as if struggling to grasp the meaning behind her words.

"It seems the unequal relationship between us is making you awkward... even when you're dealing with yourself, Khan." Kaguya sighed, a mixture of amusement and exasperation in her tone.

Then, without hesitation, she leaned in. Their lips met. A shiver ran down his spine as she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him closer.

Her tongue slipped past his lips, tangling with his as they kissed with a passion that was both restless and consuming.

His body moved on instinct—his hand finding its way to her back, gripping her possessively. His dominant urges took over, and before he realized it, he had thrown her onto the bed, pinning her beneath him.

Kaguya's face flushed a deep crimson, her ruby-red eyes gazing up at him with a mix of desire and dazed anticipation.

"Khan... I..."

Just as they were on the verge of breaking past the final barrier—

KNOCK KNOCK.

The abrupt sound at the door jolted them both, pulling away from each other in an instant, hurriedly straightening their clothes and composing themselves.

"Miss Kaguya, the meal you ordered has arrived."

Kaguya's expression darkened, clearly displeased at the interruption.

"Come in, Ai," she replied in a cold, detached tone.

As the maid entered, she immediately noticed the unusual tension in the air.

Miss Kaguya looked visibly irritated, though Ai had no clue why.

Sensing danger, she quickly placed the food down and hurriedly left, not daring to linger.

Once the door shut, Kaguya turned to Khan, her expression softening. "Alright, Khan. You must be hungry. Let's eat."

Her voice, once commanding, was now gentle—almost tender. He nodded.

His body, still tense from what had almost happened, now focused on another primal need. He was hungry, and he wanted to get this over with.

And so, that was how his first day in this world had gone. Not only had he encountered another version of himself, but he had also come dangerously close to indulging in self-cest.

But life moved on.

And in the end, had he truly lost anything?

No. Because she was beautiful, and she was perfect. She was him, his soul, his existence itself.

This wasn't about lusting after oneself—it was about self-discovery, about the philosophy of life itself.

Only by loving oneself could life be truly meaningful.

No one knew you better than you did. And so, the best companion in life had never been anyone else—it had always been yourself.

This was the understanding he had gained. This was his self-enlightenment.

As he finished his meal, he looked up. Kaguya was staring at him, her crimson eyes unwavering.

And in that moment, they both understood.

Without hesitation, they leaned in once more, their lips pressing together in perfect unison.

There was no need for words.

Only unity.

Only self-embrace.

Because from the very beginning, they were always one.