Worthy Core

Chapter 38: In Memory Of Monster Slayers



Late that evening, Lollyp and Guy found themselves summoned down to Xenia's core chamber. It's a bit more of a walk than usual for Lollyp, as the dungeon master's finally moved herself down beyond the new Floor Three, and unfortunately for her the floor boss has so far failed to talk Xenia into making a secret tunnel that goes directly to her bedroom. When she arrives though, she does at least find a few bottles set out for the occasion - summoned ones for her, and virtual refreshments for Xenia. The woman herself is waiting for them in her chair, one hand petting Sir Flopsy as he rests in her lap.

"Hey, boss. How about a secret pipe? Adventurers can't slide down a pipe, can they?"

Xenia smirks as she leans back in her chair. "Slime adventurers could. And how would you get back up it?"

Lollyp sighs. "It'd uh...be a bit of a workout, I guess. Maybe we just need to unlock more portal types already then. So, what the occasion? The official launch of Floor Three? Decided on a boss yet?"

"A bit of that, but nah. Thought I'd let you two in on a bit of a Reincarnator Extraordinaire tradition. See, most of the time when I die and move on, I figure I'm leaving behind some friends and loved ones who'll miss me, right? ...Okay, some of the time. Once in a while, it might happen. I'm an optimist, so sue me."

Guy chuckles. "Chin up, ma'am, from what you've talked about, I'm sure you've left a positive impact on more than your share of people you've met."

Xenia gasps. "Hey, your job is being the depressing realist, not the cheer-upper! I'll take it though, thanks. So, anyways, I figure odds are, I'm probably getting a funeral or a wake or memorial or whatever at the world I just left, where folks can say goodbye to me. But it occurred to me at some point that...hey, I need my chance to say goodbye to them too. So whenever a new life has settled down enough for me to grab a drink somewhere and make a toast, I like to take an evening to remember the ones I left behind. Even the folks that, I'd hope anyhow, are still walkin' around somewhere alive and well. Hope y'don't mind watching me be all depressing for an hour or so."

Lollyp smiles as she settles into her seat. "I think that sounds sweet! I'd actually like to hear more about them, from the bit I heard your last group sounded...interesting."

"That they were." Xenia pops open a brown bottle, and lifts it into the air. "So! To the monster slayers! And first and fuckin' foremost, to Beatrice the Monster Slayer herself. One of the smartest, strongest, and bravest women I've ever known, and when I'm saying it, it fuckin' means something, because I've known a fair fuckin' few." She takes a drink, letting the taste rush onto her tongue before it evaporates, while Lollyp drinks in a more traditional manner. By slime standards, anyhow, the brown fluid flowing visibly down her neck and pooling to a random point inside her chest. Guy meanwhile hovers about the table, providing moral support in this test to see if a virtual dungeon avatar can get drunk.

Toast finished, Xenia continues. "She found me half-buried in a field, covered in mud and screaming. I was the one screaming, to be clear, getting tossed a couple miles is pretty disorienting even if you ain't got a stomach. God, she was so worried about me, asked if there was some sort of...sword medicine or something she could give me. Then when I told her the local dragon tossed me, I almost thought she was about to climb up and stab him with me right then and there. Talked her out of that, but mostly by talking her into using me to stab other dudes instead. Damn, I was inside so many people and monsters and animals last round..."

Lollyp sighs. "Do you really gotta phrase it like that?"

"Slimes too, actually, especially early on, though I don't think there were any smart ones on that world. But yeah, moving on." She stops to think for a moment, before toasting again. "To those who fell in the battle against Yalrog the Despoiler: Faleen, the Ice Mage, and Yates, the Beastman. Faleen, you were a goddamn goddess with frozen water, those ice sculptures of yours were absolutely breathtaking. And without you to bring Yalrog out of the air and down to the ground, we never would have had a chance. And Yates, you scaly motherfucker...I always joked you could heal from anything, even if you lost your head. I really, really wish that had been accurate..."

Lollyp and Guy pause for a moment, before joining the toast. "To Faleen and Yates."

Xenia nods and continues. "And to those who I really hope made it outta there. To Paladin Tarry. You always gave me and Beatrice so much shit...okay, lets be honest, mostly me, but I know you loved us like we were your own kids. Even when I kept insisting I was way older than you. If it hadn't been for your training, we would have never made it half as far as we did. I know you lost a leg in that last one, but honestly, I bet you can still kick ass without it. And to Ipis, girl, you sneaky little shit. You could hit a bullseye in the middle of a hurricane, and I know you took out at least one of that bastard's eyes before I went. Lost sight of you before the end, but I'm sure you were around there somewhere, lining up a shot on the other one. To you let me say, just one last time, with all of the emotion I can stir inside my shriveled black heart...your name still absolutely sounds like 'I piss' and it's absolutely hilarious."

Lollyp almost chokes on her drink at the last part, or the slime equivalent of choking at least, bubbles forming inside the last gulp of fluid flowing through her. "Wow. They sound amazing, I only wish we got to hear the version they said about you."

"Yeah, that makes two of us. ...So, I don't always get to do this with company, but I don't want to leave anyone out. Anyone have any names they'd like to toast, while I've got the mood all somber and shit?"

Lollyp considers for a moment, then nods. "...I have a few, yeah. I've done this for them already, more or less, but I wouldn't mind sharing a story or two I suppose. ...To Fillyp, my first boyfriend, you taught me so much about the world. Even though I was only four and you were seventeen - "

This time Xenia chokes despite being unable to swallow anything in her current form. "Lollyp! What the hell!?"

The slime sighs like she was expecting this. "Always like this with you rigids. Slimes reach maturity when we're barely even two, you know! It's not weird! I mean, a little, but mostly it's just weird cause the older one's usually only got a few years left at that point, so it's, y'know...a short relationship. I can give you the complicated talk about slime biology and reproduction when we're not drinking, okay, it's just...very complicated. Okay? So, as I was saying...?"

Xenia raises her hands. "Sorry, sorry. I will...try to restrain my ignorant, rigid-based biases for the evening."

"Thank you. So, to Fillyp. You were the best teacher I had for learning about getting around in society. How to play dice, how to cheat at dice, how to swear in Rainlander, where the demons threw their secret orgies at - "

"Jesus Christ, Lollyp!"

"Fine! Moving on then. Prude." She takes a breath and starts over. "...To my brother, Bullyp. For being totally chill about me dating Fillyp, even though you were dating him too - "

Xenia starts summoning bottle after bottle on the table. "Drunk. Drunk. One of these has to be able to get me drunk." Meanwhile, Lollyp leans back and laughs her head off.

"Hahahaha! Okay, that time I was fucking with you. Ahhh...but, for real though. To my brother Bullyp, and my role model. You showed me how awesome it was to be a mage, and practically raised me. There's not a chance in the world I'd have gotten this gig without you. You were the best, bro."

Waiting for a moment to make sure Lollyp wasn't about to tack on anything else, Xenia eventually joins the toast. "To a good brother."

Lollyp continues. "Let's see...to Lessupp, my first girlfriend. You were the one to teach me how to..." She pauses as Xenia half-collapses onto the table.

"Please, I can't take any more, Lolly Pop. My virgin ears aren't meant to know this much about slimes."

The slime boss rolls her eyes. "Fine, fine. I can probably cut it off there, to be honest. Like I mentioned before...I am an old-ass lady these days. Probably like, four out of five people I've ever known are dead at this point, so I could be going at it all night. ...How about you, Guy? Anyone to add to the list?"

The guide shakes in a no. "Fortunately not, I suppose. As it happens, you and Xenia are literally the first friends I've ever had. And given that dungeons have no natural age limit, it could well be thousands of years before we find ourselves separated, if things go well."

Lollyp grins. "Well, that's worth a drink too, I'd say. To good friends, and immortality."

Xenia raises one of her many bottles. "Why not, I wouldn't say no to settling down for at least a little while, for once. To immortality."

 


 

Miles away in the Challengers camp, a figure sitting alone in their tent reads through an ancient tome and smiles to themselves. "So close to immortality..."


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