When Immortal Ascension Fails Time Travel to Try Again

Clear Eyes and I used obfuscation tokens to blur our silhouettes from the few assassins still looking for us. This allowed us to avoid running into fights we couldn’t handle. It still took us half a day to reach a small grotto near a few thinner trees, the secluded rendezvous point I set up with Little Spring.

After waiting for a few more hours while setting up a defensive formation, the kid finally arrived. His hair was down and he carried a massive egg. He also was wearing brand new clothes and looked suspiciously clean. Like he was trying to get rid of evidence.

I removed my pendant and stepped out of the cave.

“Sister Lin!” He grinned.

With a serious expression, I crossed my arms and asked, “Did you sustain injuries again?”

His eyes widened, then he glanced to the side. “What? No.”

Oh. That little liar better be prepared for the worst hell training of his life. Of course, I wouldn’t embarrass him in front of Clear Eyes, but I sent him a warning glare. He hid his wince behind the egg.

Damn. I’d helped him become too earnest. He now needed lessons on how to lie better. Misleading others believably was a skill that could save his life. Or at least our wallets.

I mean, if a Xianxia protagonist wasn’t a shameless con man, could they even be a main character?

Clear Eyes stepped forward and examined him. “Weren’t you exceedingly injured? How have you grown stronger?!”

Little Spring puffed up his chest and hefted the egg up higher like it weighed nothing. “My martial sister is an amazing physician.”

He glanced at me.

Yeah, he could say the truth all he wanted. He wasn’t getting out of hell training.

I gestured to the egg. “Is that a new special ingredient you picked up along the way?”

Was he planning on making scrambled eggs and tomatoes?

He hugged it closer and held it away from me. “No! This is the treasure I received in the inheritance labyrinth.”

“A treasure?” I leaned over to examine it. Its surface was smooth and white, like a high-quality chicken egg. I sent my divine sense toward it to peek at its contents. When my senses bounced off the shell, I took a step back. Shit.

Liquid dripped down my lips. I hurriedly wiped it away with a handkerchief, only to see red. Shit. The backlash from this damn egg gave me a nosebleed.

“Is this the egg of a spiritual beast?” Clear Eyes asked.

I rubbed my aching temples. “I don’t have much experience with their eggs since they all despise me.” Hell. I didn’t even know if they all came in eggs or if it depended on their species.

“Is that why those crabs chased after us like—”

I flicked the teen’s glabella. He shut up, then winced.

“It’s likely a powerful Mystical beast egg since I can’t look inside it.”

Actually, Bloodsword once brought home a contracted Mystical beast from who knows where. She was a white fluffy Nine-Tailed Fox who hated me. When she eventually took on human form, the creepy dumbass married her into his harem. What was her name again? Fuck, I couldn’t remember. Everyone used Fairy Snow to call her, but that wasn’t her real name.

She was the other person who could have been the culprit behind the spirit rabbit incident. I hadn’t suspected her because she’d been a dumb fox.

There were too many things I’d never know.

This egg could turn out to be a woman. One who, after she takes on human form, ends up corrupting, seducing, and marrying Little Spring just like that fox. And as a Mystical beast, she would loathe me. Even if I had mastered the Not-Giving-A-Shit mindset, it still bothered me when fluffy spirit beasts hated my very existence.

Maybe it would be better to cook it for breakfast.

Before I could make that well-thought-out suggestion, a crack showed up on the pale surface. Light burst from the fissure. A vague silhouette appeared behind the eggshell.

Shit! It was too late.

Was this going to be another fox? Maybe a snake?

When the light vanished, a small white puppy with triangle ears stood on Little Spring’s hands.

A... dog?

It lolled its tongue and barked. “Arf!”

No… The beast inside that egg couldn’t be normal. Right?

I stepped close to the puppy and held out my hand. If it was a spiritual beast, it would growl and bite me. Instead, the canine sniffed my palm, then licked it. I quickly moved my hand back and cast a cleaning technique. It didn’t seem to bother the creature. In fact, the fur became even fluffier.

Could it be a shape-shifted Ascendant beast?

I scanned it with my divine sense and examined it with my spiritual energy. All I picked up was a goddamn mundane puppy of an indeterminate breed.

It wasn’t even a wolf-type beast.

But it couldn't be a normal dog! Shit like that didn’t happen to Xianxia protagonists! Right?

Clear Eyes Mad Tongue said sagely, “That’s a very nice… pet you have there.”

Little Spring hugged the dog. “I’m going to name it Xiao Bai.”

H-he named it a classic generic pet name…

Was it possible that there had been a different creature in the egg? Actually, since we were in Tiger Head Misty Forest, what if this was originally the egg of that white tiger Ascendant beast? Maybe that creature was the actual inheritance of the maze. Could it have become impatient while waiting? Then, in desperation, it switched places with a nearby animal?

Okay. I was grasping at straws here. But Ascendant beasts had above human intelligence before birth. So, while not likely, it was possible.

Or, this creature could be a white tiger shape-shifted into a dog.

“Arf!” The puppy jumped out of the kid’s arms. Its little blue eyes noticed the fluffiness behind it. It tried to bite it and failed. Then the white ball of fluff vigorously started chasing its own tail.

This thing did not have human intelligence.

I cleared my throat. “This is a precious puppy. Raise it well.”

The kid nodded.

“I’ll feed it the best spiritual dishes I can make.”

“Can a mundane pet even eat those?” Clear Eyes asked.

“It might be possible.” It probably wouldn’t work, but I’d never tried it. If I had to guess, it would either be a waste of expensive food or it would cause its head to burst.

The kid pulled out a piece of spiritual jerky and fed it to the puppy. It gobbled it down ravenously... and it didn’t explode.

Maybe it wasn’t a dog, but an experiment?

“How did you find it?” Clear Eyes asked.

“At first, I had been in too much pain to move. Then Sister Lin walked me through healing myself.”

Nice remembering the story, brat. I secretly gave him a thumbs-up.

“And afterward?”

He scowled. “I had to run through maze-like tunnels solving a bunch of puzzles similar to the things you taught me before.”

Thanks to me, the brat had a well-rounded education that included language, math, and even puzzles. While that last subject might not be life and death to know for a regular child, every good Xianxia protagonist needed to learn how to decipher them if they were going to survive.

“When I reached the end of the trials, I was trapped, but I remembered what you said about inheritance spaces being made by someone, which meant that they could be taken apart by someone.”

I nodded and prepared myself for him to tell me that the whole labyrinth collapsed.

“So I started taking the room apart and found a hole.”

Okay, I know that I’d said that, but a Qi Condensation cultivator shouldn’t be able to take an inheritance space apart so easily. How the hell did he do it?!

“I eventually ended up in a dead end that had a game. Once I won, a pedestal appeared with this egg.”

I noticed that he specifically mentioned nothing about the game’s details. It was probably where he became injured. “Okay. So, you ended up in a labyrinth-style inheritance. And the treasure you found was this egg that had a mundane dog in it?”

He nodded.

I rested my hand on the kid’s shoulder and squeezed. I felt bad for him. Usually, Xianxia main characters find the best treasures under the heavens, but, for once, this kid’s protagonist’s luck didn’t work out for him. “You must have messed up solving the puzzles and retrieved the wrong treasure.”

Well, I still hadn't entirely ruled out that this puppy was something weird but it was obviously the little protagonist's pet. It shouldn't be harmful to keep it around for a while.

His mouth opened in shock. “Then should we go back?”

I waved my hand away. “I’d rather sell Shadow Gopher the information since this labyrinth might contain what the sect is looking for.”

The two nodded their agreement to my proposal.

Technically, I could visit the maze myself and see if I could win an inheritance, but I wasn’t that interested in risking my life for a treasure when I could create my own.

Now that I had my tree and had killed off the assassins that needed to die, I was ready to leave.

***

Soon after I contacted the Nascent Soul beast tamer, he arrived with his hair windswept and his robes disheveled like he’d traveled here as fast as he could. “Where is it?”

Little Spring gave him directions.

He nodded and handed me a large stack of expensive, high-quality talismans that he promised in exchange for the information. Thirty of them were Foundation-Establishment-level Blazing Fire spells, six of them were Golden-Core-level Dancing Star spells and three were Golden-Core-level protective talismans. I split them three ways.

He also agreed to escort us back to the sect once he was finished.

This was actually better than what we had asked for. Shadow Gopher was a good guy. Too bad he was a beast tamer or I could help him out a bit more.

***

After several hours, Shadow Gopher returned with a massive grin.

“Did you find something that would bring the group back together?”

He shrugged. “The diviners hinted that the treasure would take the form of a beast. They didn't say what it was. They mentioned that it would be found during the next three days and that our sect couldn’t allow anyone else to get their hands on it.”

“Come on. Show your martial aunt. I don’t steal from my juniors.”

Awkwardly, he held out a silvery-orange statue of a tiger.

All eyes turned to the metal sculpture. Even the puppy, Xiao Bai, looked at it. It tilted its head cutely.

“While this isn’t a spiritual tool, the metal it’s made from is very scarce, called Tiger’s Eye Impossible Steel. The fact that it’s here suggests that the master who created the maze was a grandmaster smith who wanted to leave this statue to someone worthy. The sect will give me a handsome reward for turning this in.”

That was a difficult spiritual metal to find. So rare that medium-sized sects would go to war over it. This was technically a treasure that we couldn’t allow the others to get their hands on.

And the statue itself could be considered a masterwork. Chances were that it wasn’t as simple as a chunk of metal cast in a tiger shape. Frankly, that material was a pain in the ass to work with. That said, it was also what I’d need to upgrade Senior Auspicious Paifang once I reached Immortal Bone Creation. Well, the sect could keep it safe for me. Muahahaha!

Of course, I had my suspicions that this wasn’t the only thing Shadow Gopher found, but I wouldn’t pry.

Actually, if this was the inheritance of a master craftsman then it was possible that the egg from earlier had been a spiritual device that held pets in a time suspension. This one could have been so old that it broke soon after being removed from the maze. Of course, this was merely speculation. My divine sense couldn't even penetrate the surface and there were no leftover pieces after it completely vanished.

“If you’re satisfied with your treasure, let’s go back.”

Little Spring grabbed the puppy right before it could jump out of his arms and pounce on the statue. He grinned. “I agree.”

“By the way, Senior Little Spring. Why do you have a mortal dog?”

I didn’t want to embarrass the kid by saying it was his labyrinth reward, so I just said, “He just found it nearby. Let’s go.”

Clear Eyes Mad Tongue also squeezed the kid’s shoulder with sympathy.

Even though he experienced life-threatening danger, was injured multiple times, and only returned with a dog he could find anywhere in the mortal world, the kid didn’t appear unhappy. I was very proud of him for having cultivated such a good mindset. Then again...

The puppy walked in a circle before laying on the grass. With its head down, it became a very fluffy ball.

... It was a cute puppy.

Regardless, this short mission ended with more positive gains than negatives. Now it was time to return to the sect and confront a bitch.

***

A day later, thanks to Shadow Gopher’s exceedingly fast immortal speed boat, I walked into the cave where the dealer’s father failed his lightning tribulation. The scorch marks on the floor appeared more ominous today. A chill ran down my spine. Then I remembered what Little Spring had been through, thanks to those assassins. My blood boiled.

The black market dealer’s cloaked figure greeted me as if nothing had happened. “Welcome, dear customer!”

I took out a bundle of flag sticks and held it up. When she reached for it. I pulled away.

She froze. “Is there something wrong?”

“You know, I ran into a little trouble while there.”

“Dear Customer, if you’re implying that I sold the information to others, then you’re mistaken. I haven’t revealed the location of the Golden Walnut Tree to anyone here.”

“You say that, but assassins attacked me after I harvested the tree.”

She gasped in shock. “That’s terrible. But you can’t think it’s me. I would never betray such a wonderful customer in good standing.”

“Come on. They knew exactly where to find me.”

I could feel her grin behind the shadows that hid her face. “And yet, you returned alive and well.”

“If you didn’t sell it to anyone in the sect, then it must have been someone outside. Who bought the information?”

“No one. I haven’t sold anybody the same knowledge.”

I took out one of the Foundation Establishment Blaze talismans and tapped it on my chin. “Let me rephrase this. Who did you sell my whereabouts to?”

She cleared her throat. “Dear customer—”

“Don’t ‘dear customer’ me. You sold me out for a profit.”

“It hurts me that you’d think I would dare do something so horrible.”

I activated the Foundation Establishment Blaze spell aimed at her. She held up a protective talisman like I knew she would. My flame bounced off her and hit a nearby wall.

When I took out another, her shoulders stiffened. “Let’s—”

Not bothering to let her speak, I cast it. The flames missed her by inches. It landed in the back of the cave where her escape route had been. Rocks fell. The area at the back collapsed. The mountain rumbled.

She jumped and pulled out several more protective items. “You’re crazy!”

I grinned. “You shouldn’t sell out your Great Martial Aunt!”

With a flick, the Golden-Core-level Dancing Star talisman rested between my two fingers. Something at this stage would obliterate her cheap defensive tokens, killing her.

“Fine! Fine! You’re right. I told someone about where you were heading. But I don’t know who they are or what faction they’re from. They were cloaked better than me. But so what if I did? They were paying me a mountain of spirit stones. More than what I could earn off you in several lifetimes.”

“You didn’t consider giving me a chance to offer you more?”

She snorted. “You wouldn’t have been able to pay what they did.”

“Why would you think that?”

She snorted. “I’ve worked with you enough times to calculate your income.”

I sighed. Some people in this Xianxia universe were too stupid to live. “You know who I am. Couldn’t you guess that I have special contacts that could pay you more?”

She froze as if that thought had just occurred to her.

“Now, what should we do with you? Should I call my Martial Nephew over to take care of you? Or should I just kill you myself?”

“Dear customer!” She jumped forward into a kowtow position and slid up to me. “It was a mistake. I repent. I repent!”