The Protagonist System

We severely underestimated how vicious horses could be when the clearly one-sided battle was over. The four adventurers were more pulp than people when we checked on them. Only one of them wore an actual armor piece, that was now heavily damaged, while the others settled for leather pelts and thick cloth for the most part.

The cute mage on the other hand wore a thin jacket over short shorts and it was flipping winter! The tanuki tail she had was a bit odd, too. She didn't have the matching ears and that stood out to me. Had she cast a transformation spell and it went wrong somehow? Why didn't she cancel it? Maybe it was contaminated polyjuice potion or something?

In any case, Wiz acted like a mother hen with new eggs as she took control and treated the poor souls while I cleaned up the horses and thanked them for defending us. The female looked pleased and the male huffed and looked proud. I mentally checked my Adventurer's Card from the Guild and both mounts had gained a bunch of skill levels for defeating a group of enemies.

The best part of that was some of my own skills had also risen up. My level wouldn't change until I went to a guild hall to update the card, however. That just meant I could abuse the heck out of being level one and letting the XP gains blow through the roof until I do update the card, just like I had when I wiped out so many of those giant frogs.

“I recognize these guys!” Megumin exclaimed and pointed to the white-haired male when his face healed enough. “That's Dust and his party!”

Darkness looked as well and nodded. “I know him, too. He's a shameless womanizer.”

“I wonder why they attacked the horses?” Cremea asked as she used her sword to move their fighter's sword away from his limp hand.

“It was a distraction.” I said when I realized what had happened and knelt beside the leader and rummaged through his pockets. “They weren't after the horses or the carriage, though.”

The five women gasped when I pulled out the Quest Notice for my bounty and showed them.

“At least now we know the idiot that took it.” Megumin said and used the end of her staff to whack Dust on the forehead. He didn't feel it, being unconscious and all, so she gained no satisfaction from the gesture.

“What do we do with them?” Fio asked. “We can't just leave them here.”

“We could if we wanted to feed the local animals and possibly make them sick.” I joked and the girls laughed. “You're right, though. We can't leave them.” I said as I put the Quest Notice into my inventory and took out some rope to tie up the prisoners. “I'm open to suggestions.”

The debate began and there were some good arguments for turning them over to the authorities for banditry. Accepting a hit on a fellow adventurer was pretty low, even if the payout was fairly high. Still, it was an official quest and hadn't been cancelled yet, even though the man that issued it was dead.

“We're much closer to the capitol than we are to Axel, so we might as well bring them there.” Darkness said and the others nodded. “There's plenty of room in the carriage and we can keep them safely secured and won't have to worry about them escaping or attacking us.”

“Agreed.” I said and picked up the cute mage. “Wiz, want to give me a hand checking this one out? I'm curious about the tail and no other markings or indications she's part animal.”

Wiz walked over to me and gave the young woman a quick once-over. “You're worried it was an accident and she's either suffering or stuck like that?”

I smiled warmly at her. “That's exactly right, my dear Wiz. Will you help me?”

Wiz blushed at the praise. “O-of course I'll help you.”

Darkness and Cremea were the strongest and gathered up the three males and dragged them over to the carriage. We all helped them carry the men inside and we put them into one of the unoccupied rooms that was the farthest away from the common area. When it was locked, Wiz and I took the mage into her room and didn't shut the door.

What we were doing didn't require privacy and only a nice bed to lay the patient down on. The other girls gathered in the doorway to watch as Wiz and I performed a physical examination and Wiz cast several spells. I was only level one and I couldn't really contribute magically to help, so I let her handle that part. I could still see and feel the results, however.

“What's the final diagnosis?” I asked, just so the other girls would know as well.

“It's merged into her spine like a hybrid. Her nervous system is fully integrated into it and she's adapted to using it for balance and the surrounding muscles have changed to support it properly. She must have had it for a while to have it become such a huge part of her.” Wiz said, sadly.

“You can't help her?” Fio asked, sadly.

“Removing it from her wouldn't help her at this point.” I said and pet the tail lightly and it twitched and the end flicked automatically. “It would be like cutting off one of her feet. She would have a hard time walking and would be considered hobbled.”

The girls gasped and their sad expressions made me feel guilty that it couldn't be reversed.

“It's not that bad, really. She seems to have adapted to the mutation and it shouldn't impact her life too much.” I reassured them and they relaxed. “It might help if we talk to her after she wakes up.”

Wiz looked uncomfortable and gave the others a searching look.

Darkness picked up on it right away. “Where do we put her? She can't stay with the men and she might be afraid if she wakes up and they aren't nearby.”

I had to think about that. “Well, she's a mage, so if she needs time to prepare her spells, we'll have anywhere from a few seconds to a few minutes before she can attack us magically. If we tie her up in the room next to the men and cut a window in the wall between the rooms...”

Wiz smiled and nodded, as did the others. So, that's what we did. Unlike the men, we put the mage on the bed and didn't just leave her on the floor. We also left her on her side so she wouldn't hurt her tail.

“With the excitement over, we need to get going.” I said and there was suddenly a line of girls waiting by the carriage door to give me a kiss. I held in my chuckle at the near instant reaction and kissed Darkness passionately, then I kissed Megumin tenderly, kissed Cremea hard, kissed Fio feather light, and kissed Wiz as I suddenly dipped her and made her squeal in both surprise and delight.

The girls giggled and laughed at her reaction and Wiz was blushing hard as I stepped outside and checked the alert wards. Nothing else had come near and I dismantled them and checked the horses were still attached and their bindings to the carriage were still intact and in no danger of coming loose.

I mounted the driver's seat and gently slapped the reins against the horses butts to get them going. Surprisingly, the male horse huffed and looked a little annoyed while the female horse made a soft neigh sound and looked... ahem... a little happier.

Yeah, I wasn't going to think about that too much. Or at all. Nope, nope, nope.

I drove the horses onto the main road and they opened up to their best speed on their own without my prompting. Now both horses looked happy and their breathing was even and not laboured, which was definitely a huge improvement over the last time they had pulled the carriage.

The fight must have given them a few more benefits than my card could show. Maybe I needed another one for mounts or familiars? Did they even have something like that or would I have to be satisfied with the mention on my adventure card and no real details? Eh, it didn't really matter for now. It was time to grind the skills I could while the horses pretty much drove themselves.

*

Dust woke up with a huge headache and he groaned as he opened his eyes. He couldn't remember when he fell asleep and he tried to stretch and see what jail cell he was in this time. The problem was, his hands were secured behind his back and his ankles were tied together. That had never happened before when he was arrested and it confused him... until he remembered the last thing he had done.

His eyes darted around to see where he was and was surprised to see a very nice room and his two male teammates tied up like him on their sides. He did not see Linn anywhere, not even on the bed. He shimmied like a worm over to Kevin and nudged his shoulder with his forehead. Nothing happened and he tried to move around him to nudge Trevor.

Dust was mostly successful and would never tell Kevin his face had been anywhere near his crotch, not even as a joke, despite it being kinda funny. He nudged Trevor a couple of times and quickly retreated to not let anyone see the compromising position he had been in.

“Ughhhh.” Trevor groaned and blinked his eyes. “What... where...”

“We're caught.” Dust told him.

Trevor immediately stiffened and then groaned again, because his arms were behind his back and slightly strained. His eyes darted around and he frowned. “Where's Linn?”

“I don't know.” Dust admitted. “I just woke up myself.”

“If they've hurt her... or worse... I'll make them pay.” Trevor said, his voice deadly.

“Get in line, buddy.” Dust said, his own voice angry.

“I'm fine.” Linn's voice said from nearby and she was glad they couldn't see her blush. She hadn't realized they cared that much.

“Where are you?” Dust asked.

“I'm on the bed in the next room.” Linn said. “I don't know how I got here, though.”

“None of us do.” Trevor said. “How long were we knocked out?”

“How in Eris' name would we know that?” Dust asked with a chuckle.

“Don't use the goddess' name in vain, you scoundrel.” A harsh female voice said from the other side of the closed door. “It's been about 6 hours.”

Dust silently cursed when he heard that voice. He knew it well because he had abused her nature a few times and left her behind on quests without splitting the rewards with her afterwards. It wasn't his fault she kept falling for the same tricks he pulled on her to get her cooperation. She was pretty much useless except as a meat shield anyway. Why wouldn't he abuse the heck out of that?

“What are you going to do to us, Darkness?” Linn asked, getting to the heart of the matter.

“We were tempted to leave you tied up at the rest stop.” Darkness said and the three conscious people shivered in fear, because being left tied up anywhere was dangerous. Being left on the side of the road in clear view? That was just begging to be captured and sold as slaves or used as fodder in some criminal's gang.

“We thank and praise Eris you didn't.” Linn prayed.

“That's much more respectful.” Darkness said. “We're a few hours away from the capitol, so you'll be handed over to the authorities there.”

Dust cursed a lot more in his head after hearing that. He opened his mouth to protest and the words died in his throat. What was he going to say? That he was a previous guard and plead for his life? He hadn't left on the best of terms... and he may have helped himself to some of the payroll of the garrison before he left. Okay, he took all of it. Why wouldn't he? He was leaving anyway.

“How is that possible?” Trevor asked. “The rest stop was a day and a half away from the city.”

“The horses are Kazuma's registered mounts. The more they perform well, the better they get.” Darkness said, proudly.

Dust let out a sigh at hearing that. If he had known... he still would have attacked. He just would have taken it into account first and changed his strategy a little.

“You can't hand us over to the guards. They'll hang us for being bandits.” Linn said, saving Dust from having to try and come up with a different explanation as to why they shouldn't be handed over.

“How is that my problem? You attacked a carriage carrying the Lord of Axel's daughter and her unarmed and unarmored adventurer party that were asleep at the time.” Darkness said and they felt pits form in their stomachs. “What were you going to do to us, hmm? Tickle us and give us treats? We found the quest notice in your pocket, Dust.”

The pits in their stomachs grew and they realized they were in real trouble this time. This wasn't a prank or a trick gone wrong that there would be almost no consequences for. They had attacked a noble's carriage intending to kill the inhabitants to collect the bounty on a fellow adventurer.

“I think that's enough, Darkness.” A strong male voice said and there was a loud smack.

“Ohhh.” Darkness moaned and there was a soft thump against the door. “K-Kazuma...”

“Did you like making them feel despair?” Kazuma asked and there was another smack and a soft moan. “Getting revenge for how they treated you?” Another smack and a louder moan. “Did it make you wet to hold their lives in your hands?”

There was a tearing sound and then a wet squelching sound.

“OHHHH, Goddess!” Darkness shouted. “It did! IT DID!”

“I know.” Kazuma said and then the door was softly pounded on.

Kevin eventually woke to the thumping noise and asked what was going on. He was hushed quiet by the others and they all laid there and listened as whatever was going on at the door continued on for quite some time.

*

Outside the door, the group of girls held a hand over their mouths to muffle their laughs as Megumin kept tapping the end of her staff on the door and Darkness fake moaned occasionally. Kazuma had quickly left after their prank and resumed driving the carriage to the capitol. It was the best way for them to keep Dust and his party from trying to escape.

“How long are you two going to keep doing that?” Cremea asked in a whisper.

“Until my arm gets tired, so about an hour.” Megumin whispered back, her smile tinged with evil.

They all giggled and Darkness felt satisfaction that she could get some measure of revenge on one of her tormentors. It had been really nice of Kazuma to let her handle things and she would make sure he could spank her for real with the paddle later. He deserved to benefit from the prank as much as she did.