The Porter Has No Interest in the Hero’s Party

There are various advantages to joining a hero’s party as a porter.

First, just the fact that you do dangerous work in the hero’s party makes it easy to seduce village women.

Second, you have an excuse to leave without any lingering attachment after spending a night with a widow.

Third, you can witness the heartwarming romance of young people.

The weight of the luggage fully loaded on my shoulders didn’t bother me at all. What matters is that refreshing conversations and warm scenery that make even my heart, tired from life’s burdens, flutter are unfolding before my eyes.

“Hero! Look at this! This flower is called Elisia! They say if you brew and drink it, it’s good for your skin and health!”

“Oh, really? Then it would be nice to brew it with Mille and share it.”

The hero accepts Mille’s gift with a bright smile, and Mille stamps her feet with a bright red face. This scene, resembling a child giving a gift to an admired adult, made me smile warmly.

“Ashuria, would you like to have some too? Mille picked it for us.”

The hero extends his hand to Ashuria with a smile devoid of any malice. Ashuria blinks as she faces the hero, and with a smile says:

“Thank you for the offer, Hero. I would love to join you.”

Ashuria casts her eyes downward and gives Mille a mysterious smile, causing Mille to frown and mutter in a small voice.

“I wanted to drink it just with the hero, is what she’s saying.”

Lena was walking beside me with an indifferent expression. Since I, as the porter, could get into trouble if left alone to fall behind, one member of the party always walked with me. Usually, it was Mille with her short stride or Lena with her good instincts who walked with me at the back.

“Did you read her lips?”

“Of course. Do you know how hard I’ve worked? When stealing from others, you can’t miss even the smallest clue.”

Lena said this while rummaging through my bag. I tilted my shoulder to make it easier for her to open the bag. When she took out the jerky made by Mille, a fragrant meat smell wafted out. Lena put one piece in her mouth and held out another towards me.

“Ah.”

“Oh my, thank you.”

It was indeed jerky made by a born hunter, an elf. I received the jerky like a pet, bit into it, and while chewing said:

“What do you think, Lady Lena?”

“About what?”

“About the hero. Who do you think he’ll end up with?”

“The childhood friend waiting in the village.”

Lena’s answer was full of coldness toward the party members she traveled with. She didn’t seem to have much interest in the hero, let alone the two women. I asked while tearing off a piece of jerky:

“Don’t you think people’s hearts are unpredictable? He might end up with one of those two. Aren’t you interested in the hero, Lady Lena?”

“No.”

Lena answered firmly as she tore and ate the jerky. Since the flavor had deeply permeated the meat, each tear released a stronger aroma. Lena said to me:

“You’re surrounded by pretty women here, but you’re always looking for widows in the villages. Are you a pervert?”

“Please call it a wholesome preference. In any group, when internal scandals occur, they don’t last long. While serving the hero who will someday defeat the Demon King, how could I cause trouble by doing such things when I should be helping?”

The human heart breaks easily. I had no intention of clumsily jumping into that troublesome, intensity-filled chaos and leaving scars. How many soldiers had gone AWOL just because they broke up with their girlfriends, and how many officers suffered from depression and couldn’t pull themselves together?

I considered the hero both my comrade and the hero who would defeat the Demon King.

“That’s unexpected. You’re actually a very wholesome person, mister. Except for seeking out widows.”

Lena spoke as if my behavior surprised her. She tore the jerky into thin strips and rolled it on her tongue. I momentarily glanced at the snake-like shape before answering:

“Widows are a very wholesome preference. It’s a noble act to give a night of pleasure to a woman who lost her husband on the battlefield. If the hero saves the world by defeating the Demon King, then I can be called a hero who saves a woman’s life in bed.”

“Womanizer.”

“That’s what some people call it.”

Lena nodded with a smile. She said:

“I’m glad you’re a good person. If the porter is strange, it slows down the journey.”

Lena patted the bag and said:

“I trust you, mister.”

Seeing her smile, I looked ahead at the hero, the elf, and Ashuria. With these reliable members, I felt I could follow them even to the demon realm.

“…Is this really okay?”

That’s when I thought they were really great companions, three days ago. I was now standing in a plain, sprayed with a scent that attracts ogres and with meat wrapped around my waist. Beside me, the hero stood with a complex expression, and Mille was humming a tune while evenly spraying the scent on my body.

Lena called from a distance:

“It’s fine, mister. You won’t die, you won’t die. We have the hero here who can beat up ogres.”

“Lena. Isn’t this too dangerous?”

The hero said with a worried expression. But before the hero could express his opinion further, Mille shook her head and said:

“It’s fine! We’ve set traps in front, and if necessary, Ashuria will jump out and stop it!”

“Miss Mille. You seem unusually happy today. Don’t you feel sorry for me?”

Unlike when the deer died, Mille was humming a tune while preparing for the operation. When I asked with puzzlement, she tilted her head and questioned back:

“Huh? Why should I feel sorry for you? You should be happy to sacrifice yourself for us, right?”

“…Right.”

I asked Mille once more, trying to propose a compromise:

“But why me? Can’t we just spray the… ogre-attracting scent on a tree?”

“Female ogres get excited and come looking for male scent, and you have the strongest smell among us, porter mister.”

“Hahaha! She says you smell like a mister!”

Lena, who was up in a tree, laughed loudly. Ashuria was covered in strong-smelling grass to mask her scent and was crouching in the bushes. The hero also smiled awkwardly and said to me:

“It didn’t feel right to ask for volunteers from the village. I’m sorry, mister.”

“No, no. It’s for the village. I’ll gladly sacrifice myself.”

The request we received in the village we reached after days of travel was to eliminate a mid-tier monster, an ogre. The hero’s party, currently on standby at the front line, was deployed as a special tactical unit to catch an ogre that would normally require an entire unit of ordinary soldiers.

Our hero’s party was formed to be deployed either for rear disruption where the front line had expanded, or to cover monster attacks in areas where the front line was thin, like now.

“Well, everything’s ready. Good luck, mister!”

Mille encouraged me by patting my knee. As she left, the joking atmosphere disappeared, and everyone hid in the bushes and shadows. A chilly wind blew, and only the faint shadows and strands of hair visible from my position confirmed that I was with the hero’s party members.

Being like this brought back old memories. The memory of running down a dim corridor and accidentally discovering a room with the lights on. I frowned and focused my vision into the darkness. The beast’s eyes glinted from the forest where no light entered.

“Wooooarrr…!”

The monster twitched its nose and poked its upper lip with its tusks. Its green skin and solid trapezius muscles made me wonder if it could be cut with a sword. It held a massive club in its hands, and enormous breasts jiggled beneath the roughly torn animal hide clothing. The monster twitched its nose, scanned the surroundings, then spotted me, rolled its eyes back, and screamed.

“GROOOOARRR!”

Then it started tearing at its clothes and shaking its body.

“F-f-fuck…!”

I was overwhelmed by the destructive sight and couldn’t move my body. The giant green breasts swinging before my eyes felt like massive green grapes come to life. The monster, now naked, twisted its body and started charging toward me, and its instep broke the wire set on the ground.

Snap.

“Got it!”

Mille rose to her feet and shouted gleefully. With her cry, a sharply carved log rammed into the monster’s abdomen. The ogre’s body was pushed back, and green blood flowed from its mouth.

“GRAA!”

But the ogre didn’t stop there. Despite the log impaled in its abdomen, it pushed forward, breaking the trap’s wire. The sight of it charging forward, driven by lust, despite green blood flowing down the log, was terrifying.

“Damn it!”

I turned around and started running. The ogre raised its arm to catch me.

“GRAAAAAAH!”

But the raised arm rolled on the ground before it could swing at me. Mille, nocking another arrow, gestured for me to keep running. The ogre finally slowed its pace, unable to withstand the pain, and Ashuria emerged amidst the thick dust between me and the ogre. The ogre, seemingly unaware of Ashuria’s appearance due to the strong grass smell, frowned and only looked at its hand.

BOOM!

With a white light, the ogre’s body bent into a C-shape. Unable to withstand the heavy blow, the ogre’s body tilted severely. Before it fell to the ground, Ashuria aimed a straight punch at the stake impaled in its abdomen.

BOOM!

The stake pierced through the ogre’s body like a crossbow bolt and flew across the forest.

Due to the trees splitting left and right with a boom, green leaves fluttered like cherry blossoms.

The ogre, with its side torn away, couldn’t even scream and reached out towards Ashuria with its eyes rolled back.

Ashuria faced the ogre with an indifferent expression, and the monster’s hand tried to grab her.

Ashuria didn’t move despite seeing the approaching hand.

“Sister!”

Just before I turned and grabbed Ashuria, the ogre’s body twitched, then stopped moving.

And starting from the tip of the ogre’s fist, its body began to get cut into pieces as if processed in a butcher shop, then the entire body collapsed in a diced form.

Beyond the heap that was once an ogre, the hero asked Ashuria while wiping blood from his sword:

“Are you okay?”

I sat down on the ground with a sigh, and Ashuria twisted her body and said:

“Thanks to you, Hero.”

The hero also approached me and asked:

“Are you hurt anywhere, mister?”

“Ah, no. I’m fine, Hero. Thanks to you.”