Chapter 40 klara’s Past II [OLD]
[Gundam Nova]
Metalica side 4 I.J.C 192 Klara’s POV.
The Little girl was lost, the soldier buried her mother and little brother she didn’t even get to name yet, the little girl didn’t understand, why is this happening to her. So she cried, she cried day after day, not eating anything to the point that the soldier was pushing food into her mouth and forcing her to eat. She didn’t taste the food.
She didn’t know how long had passed, only that hollow feeling waiting there to remind her of how alone she was. So what did she do now? She was alone, devoid of family, the only people she knows are the soldiers she regularly talked with but they had their duty to attend to, fighting on the front line so that they would not be any more casualty in the Side 4.
The little girl was alone, that is why she did something stupid. She walks out of Side 4. Leaving without looking back, she walked without a destination. She was tired. She slept when she was hungry. She continued to walk to find some food, and of course, it was hard to find food. What was she thinking anyway? Walking out of the safe zone, into a war zone with just a stray bullet or beam would kill her instantly, there were no daily supplies of food too, no safe place to sleep, in this field of endless dust, why did she even come out?
She doesn’t know and she doesn’t want to know. She wants to be ignorant of the world, so she continues to walk. Time passed by fast she didn’t know how long it was but surely, it would be a few weeks now, how she still survive is a miracle, food almost magically appeared to her when she needed it the most, she didn’t encounter any of the rebels at all and right now, she was in front of a gate, a gate to the inside of the side 3, the side that affects the most by this war.
So she decided to go inside, she knew and she wanted to go inside, she could already see what it was like from the other side of the gate, a flame enveloped building, crushed home, blood stains, charring remains and lastly…the faint cry of children.
For some reason, she feels the need to go inside. She felt the need to help them, the little children, maybe it was…the feeling she wanted to have this…sense of being a big sister. So with a firm step, she walks inside, passing through the gate.
Inside was another hellhole, an adult that was sitting on the ground, laying their eyes on her, she could feel her spine become chilly, and just in time, she rushed forward, avoiding the grab of a man. She didn’t think much after that, she ran with all her might, the adults were catching up to her but unlike her, they were big, so she used her body to her advantage, getting past narrow streets, windows, and others.
Once she gets away, the little girl follows her instinct, which leads her deeper into Side 3. The journey is rough, there are little pieces of glass everywhere, almost cutting her foot but thankfully she manages to walk past it. Tunneling through the narrow street, she finds herself in front of a little baby…no not a baby, a little kid younger than her. She was tugged into the arm of a woman, who she presumed to be the mother of the child, crying her eyes out. The girl was weak and alone, lost in this little colony too.
So with a firm step, she mustered up her courage and walked forward. With her footstep, the little girl was cowering in fear. “Don’t worry…I won’t hurt you.” With her broken hoarse voice, she tries to make her voice as kind as possible. The little girl looked up to her, emerald green was shining in those eyes filled with water droplets.
“You hungry? I’ve got a little bit of bread left, also I got clean water.” She moves slowly, closing the gap between them. “Here…come here…don’t worry. I won’t hurt you, I won’t bite.” She tried smiling, showing her tooth, just like how her mother taught. It…works. The little girl moved out from the dead mother's arm, and slowly moved toward her, crawling on the floor.
She was young but not so young that she needed to crawl to move, her leg was injured. So she moved closer, one of her hands was holding the bread that she had left from her last find, and on the other was a bottle of clean water.
With the little girl in her arms, she sighed in relief and watched as the girl took a little nib of the bread. “What’s your name?” She asks, waiting for the little girl to finish.
The little girl looks up at her and stares. Her eyes were full of unsureness, whether she should say anything or not. So she needs to break the ice first. “My name is…Klara. It's a name my mother gave me.”
She said, then the cold looked at her again, with those innocent emerald eyes “Irly…It’s Irly…” The cold voice was soft, she almost couldn’t hear it. But Irly…that is a good name. It sounds very pretty.
“I see…Irly. Do you…want to come with me? I can’t guarantee that you will eat every day but I will make sure that we survive…together, we will survive.” She hugged Irly, holding her as tightly as she could without hurting her.
“But…mama…” Irly looked toward the unmoving corpse.
“Don’t worry…Your Mama just…go to a better place, ahead of you…But Your Mama wouldn’t want you to follow too soon, after all. That place has nothing to do. Your Mama would surely want you to live a little more.” Klara said, holding the girl's hand. “...so come together…with big sis, ok?”
The child gave her mother one last look, before turning her head toward Klara… “Big…sis?” She asks.
“That right…I’m your big sister. So Don’t worry…I will protect you.” She took the child into a hug and the child hugged back while mumbling big sis with a little bit of tearful voice.
March 8th, Metalica’s restricted zone, I.J.C. 200
“That was my first meeting with Irly,” Klara said as she began to renaissance about the past. “After that day, I started to steal from the other Adults. I have a lot of advantages. I'm small, fast, and very flexible. I could pass the narrow gap in a wall, the half-closed window or even duck through a very large dog’s door. I steal a lot and manage to get at least a daily meal for both me and Irly. And before I knew it, I found Ken. He was digging through the trash, you know how he behaved when I first met him?” Klara turns to me with bright eyes, waiting for me to ask her.
“How?” Deciding to humor her, I did what she wanted me to and asked her about it.
“Well, First I try to get close to him, and he suddenly throws a half-eaten rotten fish at me! The smell was horrendous, and what's more, when I dodged it, he just jumped at me and bit my hand! Man, he was such a troublemaker, I got to punch him to make him let go of me then use my secret weapon, a loaf of bread to manage to lower his guard! He was like a dog back then! Ahaha!” She laughed heartily, a sight that was…very beautiful.
Her smile was like a ray of sunshine, she smiled brightly even when telling of her tragedy…and look at me…My own trauma was not even that…harsh…
“You…are strong, Klara. Stronger than me.” My voice became so low that even Klara couldn’t hear. I was… scared…to show my weak side, the side that I despise, the side I want to hide the most, but this girl… managed to make me show her my weak side.
Every day, since that day, I started ‘Acting’, I become a different ‘Person’ so that I can hide my own weakness, so I can justify my weakness. Every day is a new way to ‘act’, a new way to ‘manipulate’. I would put on an act, using the word to manipulate others to my expanse, making them do my bidding, though it wasn’t much, I was just gathering strength but every time I talked to them, the little kids, the rich kid or even the poor…I feel like…I trying to use using them. No, I Was using them.
The only people I never tried to manipulate were Sylvy and Klara…I wonder why? Sylvy was my friend, a good friend…but why not Klara? Why is she…‘Special’? Is it because she…able to look past the ‘acting’ me? Or perhaps…I was just…wanting to know someone else.
“So! Once I took Ken and Irly under my care, we continued to run around the street until we met Mother Claire inside 2. She took us in, and man, I was really a troublesome kid back then!”
Klara’s voice was like sunshine to me, her cheerful demeanor, her very presence…is something…I want, I don’t want to give it away…I want it. I want it, so so…much. I want to keep it…for myself.
“Ne…Klara…” Klara stopped talking the moment she heard my voice.
“Hm? What is it?” She turns her eyes toward me, the Amethyst eyes shine brilliantly in my eyes. Her soft lip…her green hair flowed down just enough to show her neck, the soft and slender neck…
‘Stop that…That's creepy.’ The voice inside my head rang up, it sounded like a mix of both me and the voice of a man I never heard before.
“No… it's nothing. Please continue.” I smile at her, forgetting about what I want to say…no, not forgetting but erasing it from my memory. “I want to hear about how you act when you meet Ms.Claire.”
“Oh! I was about to get to that part but you interrupted me. Well, When I was at the orphanage in Side 2, it was this place by the way. I would sneak out to steal food since it wasn’t enough to feed at the orphanage, and I would always get scolded, she would say that stealing isn’t the way. Even in that old bone of hers, she would go out to work to get us food and such, until help finally came after 2 years…” Her expression changed drastically, turning sour in a few seconds.
“The failure to provide the aid needed for Metalica is a shame that Earth’s Conglomerate will have to bear, their reason for the late response is that the Rebel has full control of Side 1 and is threatening them with the explosion of Metalica, which would result in the moon getting half destroy as its gravity would pull Metalica toward it, resulting in a big environment crisis on earth and the death of millions of people that still reside in Metalica,” I told her the reason, and I was realizing my mistake at that moment. I was letting my logical side overcome me and not considering her feelings.
“Yeah, that's what happened…” unlike what I thought…she wasn’t angry or throwing a fit…just a faint acceptance. “What happened in the past stays in the past, it is the future that matters, Say…Yoha, have you ever truly thought about your future?”
Future…what is a future without Mama…? Why…was I so fixated on her? Why? Isn’t it because she is my world? The only world in my book, the only one I need…but…is it really that reason? I'm making friends now, isn’t it?
Mama wouldn’t want me to… be fixated on her, isn’t it? So… it's alright to let go of her now…
‘No, never, I won’t let you.’ The voice, my own voice, speaking to my ear. I quickly turn around only to see air.
“You alright? You suddenly look pale, come here, give me your head! W-what! Why is your head so cold?! No good, come on, go rest!” Everything happened quickly. Klara’s hand reached my head before I could stop it, and I was quickly taken inside.
“Mother Claire! Yoha got Sick!” She yells out drawing the attention of other children, who then start to flock around me.
“What’s wrong?!” “Big sis sick!” “Is it because of me? Uhwa…waaa!”
“Wait wait… it's ok, I’m not sick. Is it not your fault alright?”
They ask me if I’m ok, if I’m sick because of them, I quickly refute the notion but some of them still cry, especially Ollie, the girl who was bawling her eyes out saying it was her fault for making me read her story till night.
Soon, Ms.Claire comes and clears the commotion away, sending the children to do their own thing before she comes to face me. Her hand quickly reaches my forehead and she sighs in satisfaction.
“You just jump to conclusion, Klara, Little miss over here was fine, Maybe a little bit tired but was fine overall.” She said and Klara quickly hid her face with her hand.
“So It was just my imagination…Good! Well, you should rest, I will go back to the laundry.” When she took her hand off her face, there was a bit of red there.
“No, let me help. Otherwise, I would feel kind of useless. I can rest after this. Besides…I do want to hear more about you.” When I said this, somehow Klara’s face was turning red but she kept it down in just a second and returned to me with a smile.
“Then you better listen carefully! I will tell you every detail there is!” That’s right…that smile…the bright smile like the sun is what I like, I want to see more of it.